# 認識你腦中的四大人格，用全腦過人生 with 神經解剖學家 Dr. Jill Bolte Taylor｜Sherry's Notes 雪力的心理學筆記

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Iw0UNcodyYs
Translation: zh-TW

[00:00] Everything in our society as human beings is a projection of our characters one, two, three, and four.
  我們社會中作為人類的一切，都是我們性格一、二、三和四的投射。

[00:06] Character one, it organizes, it categorizes, it plans.
  性格一，它組織、分類、規劃。

[00:11] We appear to be neat.
  我們看起來很整潔。

[00:13] Character two, it's holding all of our pain from the past.
  性格二，它承載著我們過去所有的痛苦。

[00:16] Brain number three is right here, right now.
  大腦三就在此時此地。

[00:18] Experiential, connected into my body.
  體驗性的，與我的身體相連。

[00:20] So brain number four, all it is is the love of the universe.
  所以大腦四，它只是宇宙的愛。

[00:24] It sounds like that eight years you were in that constant bliss.
  聽起來那八年你一直處於那種持續的極樂之中。

[00:32] I had the perception that I was perfect and whole and beautiful.
  我曾有種知覺，認為自己是完美、完整且美麗的。

[00:34] Oh, everybody was stressed out and worried.
  哦，每個人都壓力山大且憂心忡忡。

[00:39] Hi everyone.
  大家好。

[00:39] Welcome back to Sherry's Notes.
  歡迎回到雪莉的筆記。

[00:41] We have someone very special with us today.
  今天我們有一位非常特別的來賓。

[00:45] She is a Harvard trained neuroanatomist.
  她是一位受過哈佛訓練的神經解剖學家。

[00:49] At the age of 37, she experienced a severe stroke that left her unable to walk, talk, read, and even recall her own life.
  在37歲時，她經歷了一場嚴重中風，導致她無法行走、說話、閱讀，甚至回憶自己的生活。

[00:58] Through the eight years of recovery, she not only rebuilt her
  經過八年的康復，她不僅重建了自己的

[01:02] Abilities, but also shared with the world a profound new perspective on human brain and the power of resilience.
  能力，但也與世界分享了關於人類大腦和韌性力量的深刻新視角。

[01:10] I've quoted her work many times in my personal life on my previous videos.
  我在個人生活中和之前的影片中多次引用她的作品。

[01:16] So, I'm truly excited and very honored to welcome our guest today, Dr. Jill Bolty Taylor.
  所以，我真的很興奮且非常榮幸歡迎我們今天的嘉賓，吉爾·博爾蒂·泰勒博士。

[01:23] Dr. Jill, welcome.
  吉爾博士，歡迎您。

[01:26] Thank you, Sher.
  謝謝你，雪兒。

[01:28] I'm thrilled to be with you and your audience.
  我很興奮能與你和你的觀眾在一起。

[01:30] Thank you.
  謝謝。

[01:30] Thank you for coming.
  謝謝你的到來。

[01:32] I have so many questions for you as I've said before.
  正如我之前所說，我有很多問題想問你。

[01:35] So, let's start with the easy and silly one.
  那麼，我們從簡單又傻氣的問題開始吧。

[01:39] What is the difference between a neuroanatomist and a neuroscientist?
  神經解剖學家和神經科學家之間有什麼區別？

[01:46] So neuro is the nervous system.
  所以神經是指神經系統。

[01:49] So it's going to be brain, spinal cord, a central nervous system, and then the peripheral nervous system.
  所以它會包括大腦、脊髓、中樞神經系統，以及周邊神經系統。

[01:57] So as a neuroanatomist, I study the anatomy specifically of the nervous system.
  所以作為一名神經解剖學家，我專門研究神經系統的解剖學。

[02:02] A neuroscientist might...
  一位神經科學家可能……

[02:05] Study neuro in a frog or anything neuro related.
  研究青蛙的神經或任何與神經相關的事物。

[02:13] So I am much more specific uh than I am I am a neuroscientist but I am I am a neuroanatomist.
  所以我比一般的神經科學家更專門，我是一位神經解剖學家。

[02:22] Okay.
  好的。

[02:22] So it's just neuroanatomist is more specific niche within the neuroscientist community.
  所以神經解剖學家只是神經科學家社群中更專門的領域。

[02:29] Got it.
  明白了。

[02:32] I think your backstory is very important.
  我認為你的背景故事非常重要。

[02:35] So, can you share a little bit about why you decided to study human brains?
  那麼，你能分享一點為什麼你決定研究人類大腦嗎？

[02:40] Yes, of course.
  是的，當然。

[02:42] So, uh I was the youngest of three children and it turned out that my the middle child was very different from me even though he was only 18 months older than I.
  所以，呃，我是三個孩子中最小的，結果發現中間那個孩子與我非常不同，儘管他只比我大18個月。

[02:53] And you know, as little children, all we know is what's the same and what's different.
  而且你知道，作為小孩子，我們只知道什麼是相同、什麼是不同。

[02:58] We don't know what's healthy or not healthy.
  我們不知道什麼是健康或不健康。

[02:59] And it turned out that my my brother would eventually be diagnosed with the brain disorder schizophrenia.
  結果發現我的哥哥最終被診斷出患有腦部疾病精神分裂症。

[03:07] So I became fascinated in how can the two of us have the exact same experience but walk away with completely different interpretations about what just happened.
  所以我開始著迷於，我們兩個人如何能有完全相同的經歷，卻對剛剛發生的事情得出截然不同的解釋。

[03:21] So um because he was biologically the closest thing to me that exists in the universe, it was like I wanted to understand how does our brain create our perception of reality and what is real and what is normal.
  嗯，因為他在生物學上是宇宙中與我最接近的存在，就好像我想了解我們的大腦如何創造我們對現實的感知，以及什麼是真實、什麼是正常。

[03:35] So that's how I I got driven toward focused on the brain on behavior and then ultimately uh in the lab working with beautiful cells um and looking at how really asking the question which cells are communicating with which other cells with which chemicals and then in what quantities of those chemicals and what are the differences then between how a normal brain processes information versus the circuitry of a brain with schizophrenia or bipolar or OCD or other
  所以這就是我如何被驅使去專注於大腦和行為，然後最終，呃，在實驗室裡與美麗的細胞一起工作，並且觀察如何真正提出問題：哪些細胞與哪些其他細胞用哪些化學物質溝通，然後那些化學物質的數量是多少，以及正常大腦處理資訊的方式與患有思覺失調症、躁鬱症、強迫症或其他疾病的大腦迴路之間又有什麼差異。

[04:10] Uh, severe mental illnesses.
  嗯，嚴重的精神疾病。

[04:13] Right.
  對。

[04:13] That's fascinating.
  那真是令人著迷。

[04:15] I have three kids and one of them is what we called neurodivergent.
  我有三個孩子，其中一個是我們所謂的神經多樣性。

[04:23] Yeah.
  是的。

[04:23] And of course, not knowing that in the very beginning, it was just very frustrating for me as a parent, thinking, why is this kid not getting it right?
  當然，一開始不知道這一點，作為父母我感到非常沮喪，心想：為什麼這個孩子就是做不對？

[04:37] I am giving what I think specific instructions or guidelines, and you'd see the other two understand it, would comprehend it, or they might fight it, but either way, we are understanding each other, right?
  我給出我認為具體的指示或指導方針，然後你會看到另外兩個孩子理解它、會領會它，或者他們可能會反抗，但無論如何，我們彼此理解，對吧？

[04:55] And then just another one where I feel very frustrated that I don't understand what's the misconnect here.
  然後另一個孩子，我感到非常沮喪，因為我不明白這裡的誤解是什麼。

[05:03] And it was only until later I realized it wasn't that he was being naughty or he's intentionally...
  直到後來我才意識到，並不是他調皮或故意……

[05:12] trying to trigger me.
  試圖觸發我。

[05:17] It was just that he had a different perception.
  只是他有一個不同的看法。

[05:20] That's when I began to become very fascinated with our brain, our anatomy, and how that affects us.
  那時我開始對我們的大腦、我們的解剖結構以及它如何影響我們感到非常著迷。

[05:29] because I've shared with you earlier that I was a psychology and sociology major.
  因為我之前跟你分享過，我主修心理學和社會學。

[05:35] So I was very interested in human beings and the dynamics and and the cultures that we create, but I've just always thought of our brain just like another organ, right?
  所以我對人類、我們創造的動態和文化非常感興趣，但我一直把我們的大腦當作另一個器官，對吧？

[05:48] So I was focused on the personality psychology, the social psychology and whatnot.
  所以我專注於人格心理學、社會心理學等等。

[05:53] And but it was only until later that I realized we are so much affected by our biology and that it it really cannot be disconnected.
  但直到後來我才意識到我們深受生物學影響，而且它真的無法分割。

[06:02] And what I thought was okay we would have psychosmatic symptoms because how we feel but it could also be the other way around.
  而我原本想的是，好吧，我們會有身心症狀是因為我們的感受，但也可能是反過來的。

[06:10] And so your work has helped me
  所以你的工作幫助了我

[06:14] Tremendously.
  非常地。

[06:15] So can we talk a little bit about this book Whole Brain Living: The Anatomy of Choice and the Four Characters That Drive Our Life?
  那麼，我們可以稍微談談這本書《全腦生活：選擇的解剖學與驅動我們生活的四個角色》嗎？

[06:28] So before this book, the way we understood it was just left hemisphere, right hemisphere, but you were very specific.
  所以在這本書之前，我們的理解僅止於左半球、右半球，但你卻非常具體。

[06:33] It's almost as if you've written how to use ourselves like a manual.
  這幾乎就像你寫了一本如何使用我們自己的手冊。

[06:40] Can you please give us a bit of explanation of the four characters of the brain, specifically number three, where I personally had a harder grasp on the concept of number three brain?
  能否請你稍微解釋一下大腦的四個角色，特別是第三個角色，我個人對第三個大腦的概念比較難掌握？

[06:55] Interesting.
  有趣。

[06:57] Okay.
  好的。

[06:57] So here I was, I was 37 years old.
  當時我37歲。

[06:59] I was teaching and performing research at Harvard Medical School.
  我在哈佛醫學院教學並進行研究。

[07:05] And I woke up one morning and I had a hemorrhage happen in the left thinking portion of my brain.
  然後有一天早上我醒來，左腦的思考區域發生了出血。

[07:11] And in our society, the left thinking portion of
  在我們的社會中，左腦的思考區域

[07:14] The brain is the conscious brain.
  大腦是有意識的大腦。

[07:17] It is our language.
  它是我們的語言。

[07:21] It is our definition of the social norm.
  它是我們對社會規範的定義。

[07:26] It is my identity as me, an individual separate from the whole.
  它是我作為一個個體、與整體分離的身份認同。

[07:31] It is my ego center.
  它是我的自我中心。

[07:31] So this is the center of who we are and how we communicate with the external world.
  所以這是我們是誰以及我們如何與外部世界溝通的核心。

[07:37] So traditional medicine looks at us as conscious when that portion of the brain is working.
  所以傳統醫學認為，當大腦的那個部分運作時，我們是有意識的。

[07:44] Well, that's where my hemorrhage happened.
  嗯，那就是我出血的地方。

[07:48] So when I wiped out that portion of the brain, which is what I call character one, it also then seeped and wiped out character two.
  所以當我消滅了大腦的那個部分——我稱之為角色一——它也滲透並消滅了角色二。

[07:56] So both of my left hemisphere groups of cells were wiped out because what was considered the conscious mind was wiped out.
  所以我左半球的兩組細胞都被消滅了，因為被認為是有意識的心智被消滅了。

[08:08] I was still conscious.
  我仍然有意識。

[08:08] I was still aware.
  我仍然有知覺。

[08:11] I just thought in a different way.
  我只是以不同的方式思考。

[08:14] So what this experience with a hemorrhage did was it...
  所以這次出血經歷所帶來的影響是……

[08:17] Gave me insight into what is actually going on in the right hemisphere because it wasn't part of my unconscious.
  讓我深入了解右半腦實際發生的情況，因為那不是我潛意識的一部分。

[08:25] It was all I had.
  那是我所擁有的一切。

[08:27] It was now conscious to me.
  它現在對我來說是有意識的。

[08:31] So I then used that portion of my brain to rebuild after surgery to rebuild the circuits in the left hemisphere so I could become whole again.
  所以我後來用大腦的那一部分，在手術後重建左半腦的迴路，讓自己再次變得完整。

[08:43] And um so so that's how we how I came to this information.
  嗯，所以這就是我如何獲得這些資訊的。

[08:45] That's why I'm sharing that.
  這就是我分享這些的原因。

[08:47] So and and you have to consider I'm a neuroanatomist.
  所以，而且你必須考慮到我是神經解剖學家。

[08:51] So I think in terms of cells, I think in terms of circuits, I think in terms of circuits that are wired together, circuits that function together resulting in skill sets.
  所以我從細胞的角度思考，從迴路的角度思考，從連接在一起的迴路、共同運作而產生技能組合的迴路角度思考。

[09:04] And as you look at the brain then we have two emotional groups of cells with two amygdala, two hippocampi and then two singulate gyrie making up the emotional or limbic system.
  而當你觀察大腦時，我們有兩組情緒細胞，包含兩個杏仁核、兩個海馬體和兩個扣帶迴，構成情緒系統或邊緣系統。

[09:19] In each hemisphere.
  在每個半球。

[09:22] So we have a left emotional system and we have a right emotional system and they're completely separate modules of cells that do very specific things result in very specific skill sets.
  所以我們有一個左側情緒系統和一個右側情緒系統，它們是完全分離的細胞模組，執行非常特定的事情，產生非常特定的技能組合。

[09:36] And then as human we share the limbic system with other mammals but in human we have more tissue added on top and that's going to be the thinking higher cortex in the left hemisphere and in the right hemisphere.
  然後作為人類，我們與其他哺乳動物共享邊緣系統，但在人類身上，我們有更多組織加在上面，那將是左半球和右半球的思考高級皮質。

[09:51] So we humans end up with four very distinctively separate modules of cells at the neuroanatomical level and each of those groups of cells does something very specific.
  所以我們人類最終在神經解剖學層面上擁有四個非常獨特分離的細胞模組，而每一組細胞都執行非常特定的事情。

[10:03] Mhm.
  嗯。

[10:03] So, so when I lost my left thinking rational brain, I call that character one, right?
  所以，所以當我失去我的左側思考理性大腦時，我稱之為角色一，對吧？

[10:11] Character one is what we call our, you know, it's like the A type personality.
  角色一是我們所謂的，你知道，就像A型人格。

[10:16] It has language.
  它有語言。

[10:16] So, I have the ability
  所以，我有能力

[10:19] To create sound and then to comprehend when sounds are made.
  創造聲音，然後理解聲音何時被發出。

[10:26] Inside of there, I'll be able to read and write.
  在那裡面，我將能夠閱讀和寫作。

[10:28] I also have arithmetic.
  我也有算術。

[10:31] I also have a group of cells that defines the boundaries of where I begin and where I end.
  我還有定義我從哪裡開始、在哪裡結束的邊界的一組細胞。

[10:36] So that I know that this nose is mine, but these glasses on top of my nose are not of me.
  所以我知道這個鼻子是我的，但鼻子上的眼鏡不屬於我。

[10:44] And I know that because I have a group of cells in my left hemisphere right there in that character one that does that.
  我知道這一點，因為我在左半球的那個角色一裡有一組細胞負責這件事。

[10:50] So, character one, it organizes, it categorizes, it plans, it likes to control people, places, and things.
  所以，角色一，它組織、分類、規劃，喜歡控制人、地方和事物。

[11:00] It can manipulate times.
  它可以操控時間。

[11:02] It likes to be punctual.
  它喜歡準時。

[11:06] It likes um to create order in the external world because it's good at order.
  它喜歡嗯在外在世界創造秩序，因為它擅長秩序。

[11:08] It's very punctual.
  它非常準時。

[11:11] Um you know, everything has a place and everything belongs in its place.
  嗯你知道，每樣東西都有其位置，每樣東西都歸屬於其位置。

[11:17] So, it we appear to be neat.
  所以，它我們看起來整潔。

[11:19] We appear to be uh we like
  我們看起來呃我們喜歡

[11:21] to be the boss.
  成為老闆。

[11:24] Um so we know that part of who we are.
  嗯，所以我們知道那是我們的一部分。

[11:26] You know, you can look on your desk and if your desk is very neat and it's got, you know, the stapler goes right where the stapler belongs, then that's your character one that cares about that.
  你知道，你可以看看你的辦公桌，如果你的桌子非常整潔，而且訂書機就放在它該放的位置，那麼那就是你性格中在乎這件事的那一面。

[11:38] No other part of your brain cares about that.
  你大腦的其他部分並不在乎這件事。

[11:41] And so I encourage people to identify who that is.
  所以我鼓勵人們去辨識那是誰。

[11:44] It's got a to-do list.
  它有一張待辦事項清單。

[11:46] It likes to get it done.
  它喜歡把事情完成。

[11:49] It's very efficient.
  它非常有效率。

[11:50] It's very critically judging.
  它非常嚴苛地評判。

[11:54] It's very mechanical, very um hierarchical.
  它非常機械化，非常嗯，有層級性。

[11:57] It is authority and it respects authority.
  它就是權威，並且它尊重權威。

[11:59] And so I encourage people to give this part of their brain a name.
  所以我鼓勵人們給他們大腦的這一部分取個名字。

[12:01] I call mine Helen.
  我稱我的為海倫。

[12:04] She gets it done.
  她會把事情搞定。

[12:05] And um I'm guessing you have a pretty strong character one yourself.
  嗯，我猜你自己也有一個相當強大的性格一。

[12:07] Oh yes.
  哦，是的。

[12:09] And I like the name I gave her.
  而且我喜歡我給她取的名字。

[12:13] Um, it's Anna Athena and Anna from Anna Wintor, the devil wears Prada, the the editor of Vogue, and Athena obviously is the the female warrior.
  嗯，是安娜·雅典娜，安娜來自安娜·溫圖，《穿著Prada的惡魔》中的《Vogue》主編，而雅典娜顯然是那位女戰士。

[12:20] So, when you
  所以，當你

[12:22] We're talking about the left brain number one, it just sounds like our society is governed by the rules of brain number one.
  我們正在談論左腦一號，聽起來我們的社會是由一號大腦的規則所支配。

[12:32] Yes.
  是的。

[12:32] And thank goodness because it is character one that establishes what is the social norm and a part of the social norm is hierarchy and where am I on that hierarchy and in government we need to have hierarchy in order to create order and in schools school systems we need to have order in order to be able to to have function.
  而且謝天謝地，因為正是性格一號建立了社會規範，而社會規範的一部分是階級制度，以及我在那個階級制度中的位置；在政府中，我們需要階級制度才能創造秩序；在學校系統中，我們需要秩序才能正常運作。

[13:00] So, it is the character one that comes out into the world and says, "Okay, we're going to create order in the world."
  所以，是性格一號走進世界並說：「好了，我們要在世界上創造秩序。」

[13:04] And that's fantastic.
  那真是太棒了。

[13:07] Except the problem with that is that there's no genius in character one.
  但問題在於，性格一號中沒有天才。

[13:13] All character one is doing is manipulating data and information.
  性格一號所做的只是操縱數據和資訊。

[13:19] So, the genius is over in the right hemisphere.
  所以，天才存在於右腦。

[13:19] And often
  而且常常

[13:23] The left hemisphere doesn't have much respect for the right hemisphere, especially in, uh, the western society.
  左半球對右半球沒有太多尊重，尤其是在西方社會。

[13:32] We are so skewed to the values of the left, which is around me, me, the individual.
  我們如此偏向左半球的價值觀，也就是圍繞著我、我、這個個體。

[13:36] I know where I begin.
  我知道我從哪裡開始。

[13:39] I know where I end.
  我知道我在哪裡結束。

[13:41] I know where I am on the hierarchy.
  我知道我在階層中的位置。

[13:43] And I want more and I want more and I want more.
  而且我想要更多、我想要更多、我想要更多。

[13:46] And so I keep achieving, achieving, achieving.
  所以我持續達成、達成、達成。

[13:49] But there's no end to achievement.
  但成就沒有盡頭。

[13:51] I still want more.
  我仍然想要更多。

[13:54] And so this is our stress circuitry.
  而這就是我們的壓力迴路。

[13:57] And so you know, stress is — we cannot live in a constantly stressful environment.
  所以你知道，壓力是——我們無法生活在持續緊張的環境中。

[14:03] We need to have the pause, and the pause comes over in the right hemisphere, which we'll get to.
  我們需要暫停，而暫停來自右半球，我們稍後會談到。

[14:07] Okay.
  好的。

[14:10] I don't know who said it, and I remember hearing about it.
  我不知道是誰說的，但我記得聽過這件事。

[14:13] Someone said our society is living as if we all had a right brain stroke.
  有人說我們的社會活得像我們都得了右腦中風一樣。

[14:21] Yes, we are — that we're not balanced in such a way.
  是的，我們就是——我們在這種方式下不平衡。

[14:25] Completely completely skewed out of balance.
  完全完全失衡了。

[14:28] But I would argue the younger generation, Gen Z or Gen A, their idea of hey, don't label me or I mean that sometimes is very obscure for older generations for us to understand.
  但我認為年輕一代，Z世代或A世代，他們那種「嘿，別給我貼標籤」的想法，有時對我們老一輩來說非常難以理解。

[14:43] Yeah.
  是的。

[14:46] But I almost feel like it's a rebellion against this very left hemisphere structured society where they're fighting back and say, you know, everything's fluid.
  但我幾乎覺得這是對這個非常左腦結構化的社會的一種反抗，他們在反擊並說，你知道嗎，一切都是流動的。

[14:57] There's I don't want any structure.
  就是我不想要任何結構。

[14:58] There's a reason.
  這是有原因的。

[15:00] But there's a reason for that.
  但這是有原因的。

[15:03] So, so let's make a note to loop back to that near the end.
  所以，所以讓我們記下來，到接近結尾時再回頭討論這個。

[15:05] Okay?
  好嗎？

[15:05] Because there's a reason why.
  因為這是有原因的。

[15:07] Got it.
  明白了。

[15:08] Okay.
  好的。

[15:10] So, character one is the left thinking tissue.
  所以，角色一是左腦思考組織。

[15:13] Character two is what I call the left emotional tissue.
  角色二是我所謂的左腦情緒組織。

[15:16] Same left hemisphere emotional amygdala, amygdala, hippocampus, singulate, gyrus.
  同一個左腦半球的情緒杏仁核、杏仁核、海馬體、扣帶回、腦回。

[15:21] So that portion of the brain, this is a genius, genius group of cells that is
  所以大腦的那個部分，這是一群天才、天才的細胞，它正在

[15:27] Capable of stepping out of the experience of the present moment.
  能夠跳出當下時刻的體驗。

[15:33] Now, first of all, just consider how is it that here I am a biological creature made up of 50 trillion cells.
  現在，首先，請思考一下，我這個由50兆個細胞組成的生物是怎麼回事。

[15:42] I mean, all I am are cells and I'm not just in the present moment having an experience and having life.
  我的意思是，我不過是細胞，而且我不僅僅是活在當下、擁有體驗和生命。

[15:48] These cells step out of the present moment and take the information from the present moment and compare it to every past experience we ever had.
  這些細胞跳出當下，從當下獲取資訊，並將其與我們過去的每一次經歷進行比較。

[16:03] Wow.
  哇。

[16:05] To me, I mean, that's just mind-blowing that that's even a model for an animal, right?
  對我來說，我的意思是，這簡直令人難以置信，甚至能作為動物的模型，對吧？

[16:10] So, so what this means is that this little character too, as genius as it is, it's holding all of our pain from the past.
  所以，這意味著這個小角色，儘管它如此天才，卻也承載著我們過去所有的痛苦。

[16:19] It recognizes pain.
  它辨識痛苦。

[16:21] It recognizes trauma.
  它辨識創傷。

[16:25] It recognizes and holds on to our craving of for our addictions.
  它辨識並緊抓著我們對成癮的渴望。

[16:30] So and what does it do?
  那麼，它有什麼作用？

[16:34] Information coming in through our sensory systems is information.
  通過我們的感官系統進入的資訊就是資訊。

[16:37] It's energy.
  它是能量。

[16:41] And when the information comes into the present moment and I don't like it, I don't want it because it feels familiar and it feels bad and wrong, I want to push it away.
  而當資訊進入當下，我不喜歡它，我不想要它，因為它感覺熟悉、感覺糟糕且錯誤，我想要把它推開。

[16:50] I want to I going to call that a threat.
  我想要——我打算稱之為威脅。

[16:52] I'm gonna call that danger and I'm gonna get loud and I'm gonna get ugly or I'm gonna play dead or I'm gonna flee, but I'm gonna have an automatic emotional reactivity.
  我打算稱之為危險，然後我會大聲、我會變得難看，或者我會裝死，或者我會逃跑，但我會產生自動的情緒反應。

[17:02] So, our emotional reactivity is information being processed and I don't really know what to do with it because those cells are emotional cells.
  所以，我們的情緒反應是正在被處理的資訊，而我並不知道該如何處理它，因為那些細胞是情緒細胞。

[17:15] They're not rational thinking cells.
  它們不是理性思考的細胞。

[17:18] So, they're going to have a reactivity and they're never going to mature.
  所以，它們會產生反應，而且永遠不會成熟。

[17:22] And so that's why I, a woman in my 60s, can throw a fit just like I did when I was two.
  而這就是為什麼我，一個六十多歲的女人，可以像兩歲時那樣發脾氣。

[17:28] It's because those cells when
  這是因為那些細胞當……

[17:30] Triggered are just going to have an emotional reactivity in response to the information.
  被觸發時，只會對資訊產生情緒反應。

[17:40] So character two, it's kind of the beauty of this material of this these cells is it's all of our really deep emotions.
  所以角色二，這正是這種材料、這些細胞的美妙之處，它承載了我們所有真正深刻的情感。

[17:48] I feel grief because someone I loved has passed and I can pull into the memories of that person, bring them into the present and I can just gush and be enveloped by this deep deep feeling of grief.
  我感到悲傷，因為我愛的人去世了，我可以沉浸在那個人的回憶中，將它們帶到當下，然後盡情傾訴，被這股深沉的悲傷感包圍。

[18:03] Or if something happens and it triggers my anger, then anger is energy that needs to push something away.
  或者如果發生某事觸發了我的憤怒，那麼憤怒就是一種需要推開某物的能量。

[18:09] So I might rage.
  所以我可能會發怒。

[18:13] Or if I feel uh guilt over something that I said in the past or shame over something that I did in the past.
  或者如果我對過去說過的話感到內疚，或對過去做過的事感到羞愧。

[18:21] So this little character too is all these really really really deep emotions and can behave in with emotional reactivity and the secret to this information is that um this is
  所以這個小角色也包含了所有這些非常非常深刻的情感，並且會以情緒反應的方式表現出來，而這個資訊的秘密在於，嗯，這是

[18:34] Information, it's not to be a lifestyle.
  資訊，它不該是一種生活方式。

[18:37] So if I receive information, then I can have my reactivity.
  所以如果我接收資訊，我就能擁有我的反應性。

[18:44] I can recognize I have a problem with this.
  我能辨識出我對此有問題。

[18:47] Every time I think of that person over the last 20 years, I still get mad.
  每次我想到那個人，過去二十年來，我仍然生氣。

[18:52] Well, what is that about?
  嗯，那是怎麼回事？

[18:55] Why, why am I doing that?
  為什麼，為什麼我要那樣做？

[18:55] And so I can use other parts of my brain to help analyze this, and then I can grow.
  因此我可以運用大腦的其他部分來幫助分析這個，然後我就能成長。

[19:02] I can learn, and then I can grow, and then I can heal.
  我可以學習，然後成長，然後痊癒。

[19:08] Gee, what a concept.
  哎呀，真是個概念。

[19:08] I can heal, and then I can transform.
  我可以痊癒，然後轉變。

[19:11] What is, what am I now without that pain?
  那是什麼，沒有那份痛苦的我現在是什麼？

[19:14] So, it's, we're very, very complex in each of these characters.
  所以，我們在每個角色中都非常非常複雜。

[19:20] And, uh, and that's the gift of character 2.
  而且，呃，那就是角色二的天賦。

[19:22] So, character two, if I were to summarize based on your description, it's almost like a very motherly protective figure, too.
  所以，角色二，如果我根據你的描述來總結，它也有點像一個非常母性的保護形象。

[19:32] Um, it's, hey, I need to protect you.
  嗯，就是，嘿，我需要保護你。

[19:32] This is scary.
  這很可怕。

[19:35] is shocking.
  是令人震驚的。

[19:38] That's why I need to fight back.
  這就是為什麼我需要反擊。

[19:41] I got to protect me.
  我必須保護自己。

[19:41] But at the same time, it also contains a lot of data of our emotions.
  但同時，它也包含了我們大量的情緒數據。

[19:47] And I think in our society and even I realized later on in my life that that's a part of that contains the data that I try to forget or I try to suppress a lot of times.
  而且我認為在我們的社會中，甚至在我後來的人生中，我意識到那是包含了我試圖忘記或經常壓抑的數據的一部分。

[20:00] Exactly.
  正是如此。

[20:00] Right.
  對。

[20:03] because whatever I was feeling was not rational.
  因為我當時感受到的一切都不理性。

[20:05] So I wanted to put it aside where I think a lot of times we try to distract ourselves from what this part of our brain is telling us.
  所以我想要把它擱置一旁，而我認為很多時候我們試圖分散自己的注意力，不去理會大腦這部分告訴我們的事情。

[20:17] So that's brain number two.
  所以那是第二個大腦。

[20:21] And and and I loved what you said to protect me.
  而且而且而且我喜歡你所說的保護自己。

[20:25] This is the group of cells that defines me as an individual.
  這是定義我作為一個個體的細胞群。

[20:31] I am now separate from the present moment flow of of eternal energy that is big is the universe.
  我現在脫離了當下那永恆能量的流動，那能量廣大即是宇宙。

[20:39] So these cells step out of the

[20:42] consciousness of the present moment

[20:44] where where I literally am an energy

[20:47] ball to my right hemisphere open to the

[20:50] possibilities of everything. As those

[20:53] cells step out of the consciousness of

[20:56] the present moment, they also form me.

[20:59] Me, me, the individual. Now I'm

[21:02] separate. And because I'm separate, then

[21:05] I can look at it and it can look at me

[21:08] and now there's an other. And that

[21:11] means, oh my gosh, I could die and talk

[21:14] about Yes, exactly. self-p protection.

[21:18] It gets completely turned on uh in

[21:21] little character too.

[21:23] So it's not sometimes not pleasant but I

[21:27] do it it is there to protect us and

[21:30] provide us with information of who we

[21:32] are and what we need to do

[21:34] and we have to have that in order to to

[21:37] learn and in we have to learn in order

[21:40] to grow. So, you know, so many people

[21:43] say, "Oh, can't we just cut that out?

[21:45] You know, give me a labbotomy." And it's

[21:46] like, "No." You know, you you actually

[21:49] need that tissue to learn, to grow, to

[21:52] heal, to transform into the next whoever

[21:56] you are without that fear and that pain.

[21:59] You just spoke about my question later

[22:03] on is that that's where trauma is

[22:07] retained. And there are so many people

[22:10] that I've talked to about your work who

[22:12] said, "Wish you could shut this part

[22:14] down."

[22:15] Exactly. That's what people want to do.

[22:18] But that's not what what you want to do.

[22:20] What you want to do is you want to know

[22:23] how do I love this part of me?

[22:26] How do I love this part of me? And that

[22:28] part is not designed to love itself.

[22:32] It's not that girl.

[22:33] It's designed to be trauma. Ring, ring,

[22:37] ring. We got a problem down here. It's

[22:40] the alarm, alarm, alert, alert. We've

[22:42] got something that we don't feel safe

[22:44] with that we need to focus on. And so,

[22:47] character one comes in and says, "Well,

[22:49] I'm busy. Let's shut that down because I

[22:51] can't process that right now." Right?

[22:53] But, but the beauty of having these four

[22:56] characters in the brain is that they,

[22:59] the other three, are really healthy.

[23:02] They're healthy and they're strong and

[23:04] they're able. And so we're never alone.

[23:07] That little character too feels isolated

[23:09] and alone because now it's separated

[23:12] from the consciousness of the universe,

[23:14] whatever you want to call that. and and

[23:17] it is separate from that and it

[23:18] constricts and it holds on and it's

[23:20] tight and it's mine and it's my pain and

[23:23] and and and don't take it away from me

[23:25] because I know who I am because I know

[23:27] my trauma from the past and and so I'm

[23:30] going to regurgitate over on my trauma

[23:32] of my past which only makes it stronger

[23:34] because the more you run a circuit the

[23:36] stronger that circuit becomes. So, so it

[23:39] let it let it and love it that it is

[23:43] capable of doing what it does and then

[23:46] use the other parts of the brain to hold

[23:50] that and to help that heal and to love

[23:53] that and to learn to self soothe. That's

[23:56] the beauty of whole brain living is that

[23:58] character number four, which we haven't

[24:00] spoken of yet, all it is is the love of

[24:03] the universe. So why can't I hold my own

[24:06] pain from the past with my love of the

[24:10] universe that I'm constantly connected

[24:12] to? So that's the power of whole brain

[24:16] living.

[24:17] That's wonderful. And what doesn't kills

[24:20] makes us grow, right? Um makes us

[24:23] stronger. So moving on to number three.

[24:27] Okay, so we've talked about characters

[24:29] one and two. They're both in the left

[24:31] hemisphere. And so in the left

[24:33] hemisphere, little character 2 steps out

[24:36] of the present moment. So it we are able

[24:40] to have a past, a present and a future.

[24:42] So the left thinking brain then has what

[24:45] we call linearity across time which

[24:48] means A happens then B then C then D

[24:51] then E and it goes up and down and then

[24:54] we have hierarchy. We have above, we

[24:57] have below. Now we have these very

[24:59] direct relationships

[25:01] and and then we have goals around

[25:05] around who we are in relationship to

[25:08] everyone else. So the left hemisphere

[25:10] has me the individual and I have

[25:12] linearity across time. The right

[25:15] hemisphere doesn't have any of that. I

[25:17] Joe Bolty Taylor that girl died that

[25:20] day, the day of my stroke. It wiped her

[25:22] out. I had no recollection of my life. I

[25:25] had no recollection of her. I had no

[25:28] recollection of what my name was or that

[25:30] I even needed a name. I had no idea who

[25:32] my mother was.

[25:35] I had no idea who my I couldn't have

[25:37] picked her out of uh maybe I could have.

[25:39] I don't know. But I don't think I could

[25:41] have. I didn't know what a mother was,

[25:43] much less who my mother was. So the

[25:46] right hemisphere. So I wiped out

[25:48] characters one and two. They were gone

[25:50] with the hemorrhage. All I had was the

[25:52] right hemisphere. And so all I had was

[25:55] the right here, right now, present

[25:56] moment. Well, the thing about the

[25:58] present moment is if it's not right here

[26:00] in front of me. I don't remember what's

[26:03] back there. So, I'm here. I'm present.

[26:07] I'm bringing in information. And then I

[26:09] turn and I look that way. And you don't

[26:12] exist for me anymore because you're in

[26:15] my past, right? You're

[26:16] So, that object permanency is

[26:19] gone. I mean I mean all I had was what

[26:22] is right here right now present moment.

[26:25] Now the beauty of the present moment is

[26:28] that it is expansive. It's billions of

[26:32] bits of data and they're all connected

[26:34] to one another. And the left brain then

[26:36] comes in and starts picking it apart and

[26:38] it wants details, details, more details

[26:41] about those details. But the right

[26:42] hemisphere doesn't care about details.

[26:45] It's about how does it all fit together?

[26:48] And then there's that group of cells in

[26:50] the back of my left hemisphere that

[26:52] defines the boundaries of where I begin

[26:54] and end so that I know where what is the

[26:58] holographic image of me. It's gone. I

[27:01] don't have any perception of myself

[27:04] ending where my skin meets air. It's

[27:07] gone. So, all I know is I'm this massive

[27:11] amazing biological

[27:13] conglomeration of 50 trillion molecular

[27:17] geniuses called the cells that make up

[27:20] my form. And it's like, wow. All of a

[27:24] sudden, I'm just wow. And I'm in the

[27:28] experience of the present moment. What

[27:31] does it feel like to be alive right

[27:34] here, right now? What does what does it

[27:36] feel like to have the clothes on my

[27:38] body? What does it feel like? What does

[27:40] it feel like? How much humidity is in

[27:42] the air? I can detect that. What does it

[27:45] feel like when I dive into the water and

[27:47] I feel the pressure of the water against

[27:50] my body and the temperature? Oh my gosh,

[27:53] I can experience temperature in my body

[27:56] and and oh my gosh, wetness. Wet. I I

[28:00] know what wetness feels like. You don't

[28:02] feel wetness in the past or the future.

[28:05] You feel wetness right here, right now.

[28:08] So I low wet and dry and hot and cold

[28:11] and possibility and oh my gosh, there's

[28:14] no right and wrong and there's no good

[28:16] and bad because that's all defined by

[28:18] the left hemisphere. So I'm open to all

[28:21] possibility. So I'm automatically

[28:25] creative because because I have no idea

[28:28] what that tool is for. Uh maybe it looks

[28:32] like a fork to my left brain, but to me

[28:34] it I'm looks like a good back scratcher,

[28:36] right? There's no definition of

[28:40] anything. So I'm creative, I'm

[28:42] innovative, I'm entrepreneurial, I'm

[28:45] musical, I'm I'm athletic, I'm I'm I am

[28:51] experiential. So that's what's going on

[28:53] in character three. That's going to be

[28:56] then instead of the emotional the deep

[28:59] emotions of the left brain of my past,

[29:03] it's going to be experience. What does

[29:05] it feel like in this body now to feel to

[29:09] feel whatever it is I'm doing?

[29:12] So, it's a is it right that it's

[29:14] extremely connected to the senses that

[29:19] it's it's just your sensory information?

[29:24] Well, I've got both. But the left

[29:26] sensory information is defining the

[29:29] holographic image of me. The right

[29:32] hemisphere is experiential.

[29:36] Got it? So, this is the experiential

[29:39] sensory.

[29:40] This is experiential sensory. And what's

[29:43] going on in my gut? So, how does my body

[29:46] communicate with me when I'm making big

[29:48] decisions? And it's not in my left

[29:50] character one saying, "Oh yeah, let's

[29:53] weigh the pros and cons and make the

[29:55] list." Right? Everybody says, "Okay,

[29:57] let's make the pros and cons list." And

[29:59] it's like, "Well, yeah, but my gut is

[30:01] telling me I need to not do this." Or my

[30:04] gut is telling me I need to do this, but

[30:07] I'm listening to my gut because my gut

[30:10] is is embodying the experience. it has

[30:13] taken me and placed me in that

[30:16] possibility and it doesn't like the way

[30:18] that it feels.

[30:20] So, it sounds a lot like the present-

[30:22] day yoga classes I go to, right? It's be

[30:27] present,

[30:28] right? And it's a lot of meditation

[30:31] guidance. It's it's guiding you to feel

[30:34] this part of your brain.

[30:36] What it's doing is it's guiding you to

[30:39] quiet your characters one and two. M

[30:42] okay. So that is a very useful um one of

[30:46] the useful tools is meditation yoga

[30:48] because really it's it's trying to

[30:50] awaken your right he hemisphere

[30:53] but when you're there you can't you

[30:55] can't analyze it

[30:56] right

[30:57] and that's that's what the left

[30:58] hemisphere wants to do. It wants to

[31:00] analyze okay okay I'm doing this move

[31:04] I've got my body here is my chief

[31:06] flowing oh I got to pick up bananas on

[31:09] the way home. Oh, that was a thought.

[31:10] I'm supposed to just not pay attention

[31:12] to that. Am I even doing this right? How

[31:15] much is this costing me? You know, I

[31:18] mean,

[31:18] you've just described my experience at

[31:21] my yoga class. Thank you. That was

[31:23] exactly it.

[31:25] That was exactly it. What are we doing

[31:28] again? Yeah.

[31:29] Yeah. And what's happening is your you

[31:32] what you're ultimately trying to do is

[31:34] use yourself, your character three, to

[31:39] let characters one and two fade

[31:44] into the background. This really becomes

[31:46] about focus. Think about your brain as

[31:49] like your little cute brain there. Think

[31:51] about it. There's a little flashlight in

[31:53] there. And where which part of the brain

[31:56] are you going to shine the flashlight

[31:58] on? Because flashlight is light. It is

[32:00] energy. And so whatever group of cells

[32:03] of these four groups you shine that

[32:05] flashlight on, that's what's going to

[32:08] run.

[32:10] And the more you run circuitry, the

[32:12] stronger the circuitry becomes and then

[32:14] the more habitual that that group of

[32:18] cells becomes no matter what it is. So

[32:20] that's why practice makes perfect. And

[32:22] if perfect is the goal and the only part

[32:25] of your brain that perfect is important

[32:27] is character

[32:28] right and I think that's why it's so

[32:30] important that we understand these parts

[32:33] of our brain. So we we're we're

[32:35] conscious intentional in shining that

[32:38] light.

[32:39] That's right. And so now when you go and

[32:41] you do your yoga as you go in there

[32:44] you're going to say okay my goal is to

[32:48] get into my experiential. I know what it

[32:52] feels like. Remember what I was like

[32:55] when I was four years old and I knew how

[32:57] to play. What was fun for me? And I feel

[33:00] that little energy ball in my chest and

[33:03] it's like, "Oh yeah, I remember what it

[33:05] was like to have fun. I remember that

[33:08] friend who we'd have belly laughs with

[33:10] when we'd have slumber parties. Oh yeah,

[33:12] I know what joy feels like. Oh yeah, one

[33:14] of my best experiences." And I just, you

[33:17] know, when I was learning how to do this

[33:19] and I just laughed and laughed and

[33:21] laughed because it was just just

[33:22] hilarious because I couldn't do it or

[33:25] whatever, you know. So that kind of

[33:28] experiential, put yourself in that

[33:30] little girl the next time you go to yoga

[33:33] and go have fun on the mat. So what I'm

[33:36] saying is embody the feeling of little

[33:40] you when you were giggly. Go embody it

[33:43] because because all that joy is in here.

[33:47] So go find it

[33:49] to invoke automatically. What happens?

[33:52] Just watch me. What happens to me? I'm

[33:54] over here bouncing

[33:56] because my little character three is

[33:58] bouncing. She's right there. She's

[34:00] always right there. She's so in my body.

[34:03] I cannot be my charact I cannot be my

[34:06] character three and talk like this. It

[34:08] just doesn't happen.

[34:10] Got it. Got it.

[34:11] See what I'm saying? My my my little

[34:14] character three is a little tiger,

[34:16] you know? So, who was one of your

[34:17] favorite cartoons? And why were they one

[34:19] of your favorite cartoons, you know? And

[34:22] and think about think because cartoons,

[34:25] music, everything in our society as

[34:29] human beings is a projection

[34:32] of our characters one, two, three, and

[34:34] four. So go through a whole list of

[34:37] movies and say, "Oh yeah, that's

[34:38] definitely a character two movie or a

[34:41] character three movie or a character

[34:43] four movie or a character one

[34:44] documentary."

[34:46] Right. So So everything is a projection

[34:50] of our four characters because that's

[34:52] what we are anatomically.

[34:54] Right. Right. Understood. So let's talk

[34:58] about brain number four.

[35:00] So brain number four. So if brain number

[35:02] three is right here right now,

[35:05] just just present moment literally big

[35:07] as the universe experiential connected

[35:11] into my body the right amygdala

[35:13] hippocampus singulate gyrie. The

[35:16] character for is the thinking tissue

[35:19] added on top of that. Now this tissue I

[35:24] want you to consider that you are

[35:29] standing on a beach. You can do that.

[35:31] You live on an island. You're standing

[35:33] on a beach. It's a beautiful day. The

[35:37] temperature is perfect. The dawn, the

[35:40] sun is rising or the sun is setting. And

[35:43] you feel the expansiveness of your whole

[35:46] chest go open.

[35:49] And you take a big inhalation.

[35:53] And you think to yourself,

[35:56] I am so in awe that I exist at all.

[36:04] Wow. I am alive.

[36:09] I am so grateful

[36:11] that I am alive.

[36:15] And then you see little dolphin

[36:19] and you there's something about dolphin

[36:21] that make my whole heart go, "Oh my god,

[36:26] it's dolphin." You know,

[36:28] I love dolphins, too. sea creatures,

[36:31] whales,

[36:33] creatures, beautiful life that leaps and

[36:38] it's like in slow motion and it's like

[36:41] and I become the motion and I feel the

[36:46] tide and the tide breathes in

[36:51] and the tide breathes out

[36:55] and I match my breath to the breathing

[36:58] in

[37:00] and breathing out and I literally become

[37:04] at one with the consciousness of the

[37:07] universe and the awe and the wonder

[37:10] of my existence and of your existence

[37:14] and of our existence as humanity.

[37:18] So that's I think what monks would call

[37:20] nirvana where you hit that place where

[37:23] you really feel oneness with

[37:26] all. So when you did have that stroke

[37:30] and it sounds like that eight years you

[37:33] were in that constant bliss.

[37:36] Yeah.

[37:36] Is that true? So it was

[37:39] people around you that were probably a

[37:42] little stressed out and worried.

[37:44] Oh, everybody was stressed out and

[37:45] worried.

[37:47] But you yourself, but little did they

[37:49] know you were in this beautiful place. I

[37:53] had the perception that I was perfect

[37:55] and whole and beautiful just the way

[37:57] that I was. And it was never my goal to

[38:02] go back to being the woman I had been

[38:05] because I no longer was her. I'd already

[38:08] gained something new, a new awareness,

[38:12] an un an uninhibited, unfiltered

[38:15] experience of being the love of the

[38:18] universe. And I perceived myself as a

[38:22] fluid instead of as a solid because we

[38:26] are fluid. We perceive ourselves to be a

[38:29] solid because of that tiny little group

[38:31] of cells. But we are fluidity in a fluid

[38:35] environment in a fluid world of

[38:38] electromagnetic radiation and all of

[38:41] these little molecules and we're just in

[38:44] the flow of it all. And then uh you know

[38:48] then that left hemisphere comes online

[38:51] and says okay I'm a single I'm a solid

[38:53] I'm separate again now I want to be the

[38:55] boss. And that's what happened when my

[38:57] character one was because I used my left

[39:00] he my right hemisphere over eight years

[39:03] to rebuild the circuitry of my left

[39:07] brain because I'm a neuroanatomist. I

[39:09] knew what I lost. I know what it looks

[39:11] like. I cut them cut brains up. Uh, I,

[39:14] you know, I just have a relationship in

[39:17] every way with brains. And so I used

[39:21] what I what I knew about neurons to work

[39:25] with my cells, even the ones that were

[39:29] in trauma in order to help give them

[39:33] what they needed in order so that the

[39:35] cells could heal. And once the cells

[39:38] could heal, then they could become

[39:39] functional again. And then I would

[39:42] regain ability. I can't have ability if

[39:45] I don't have the cells that perform the

[39:47] function.

[39:48] Right. What you're what what you just

[39:50] said was fascinating because it sounds

[39:53] like you intentionally

[39:56] helped yourself rebuild

[39:58] 100%. 100% a thousand times a day.

[40:02] Absolutely. I mean, just think about it.

[40:05] I mean, here I am. I've had a

[40:07] hemorrhage. I'm 37 years old. My left

[40:09] hemisphere is wiped out. Character 3 is

[40:12] wiped out. I have no oomph in my body.

[40:14] My body just feels like a ton of lead

[40:16] laying in the bed. I have no idea the

[40:18] position of my body in space because

[40:21] that group of cells is offline. And all

[40:24] I have is this awareness that I didn't

[40:28] die that day. I didn't die that day. And

[40:32] that was all I needed. I did not die

[40:35] that day. I was not dead. I was still

[40:40] alive. And because I was still alive,

[40:44] I had possibility.

[40:46] And what I really needed, and I had the

[40:50] best mother in the world who let me, I

[40:52] needed sleep. And she let me sleep. And

[40:56] because when we sleep, that's when all

[41:00] the garbage cleaning system of of the

[41:04] brain comes out. And because my brain is

[41:07] nothing but cells. Well, what are cells?

[41:09] They're little living creatures. What do

[41:11] living creatures do? They eat and they

[41:14] create waste.

[41:16] So, and when we sleep, these other

[41:18] little cells go in and they flush out

[41:21] the waste so that I can function again

[41:25] so that the cells can come back online.

[41:27] And I had all this trauma in there. I

[41:30] had broken cells. I had broken blood

[41:33] vessels. I had fluid edema that didn't

[41:37] belong in there. I had to have all that

[41:39] get cleaned up. I needed sleep. So my

[41:43] mother let me sleep and then when I

[41:45] would wake up, she would feed me. And

[41:48] what did she feed me? She fed me real

[41:50] food, you know. She fed me vegetables.

[41:52] She fel fed me fruit. She fed me what I

[41:55] needed to eat. And then uh she'd take me

[41:59] to the bathroom and if I had any energy

[42:01] left over, she knew I was an infant. And

[42:04] we began again. And she taught me how to

[42:07] walk, how to talk. Uh she taught me how

[42:10] to read. She taught me how to do

[42:12] everything. Uh and I only had so much

[42:14] energy because I was wounded. I was

[42:16] severely wounded person.

[42:19] And so if I had energy, I had to choose.

[42:23] Am I gonna try to take a walk? Am I

[42:26] gonna learn how to walk up and down some

[42:28] steps? Or am I going to walk around this

[42:31] track with my mom in order to get my

[42:34] body back again? Or am I going to use

[42:36] that energy to look at at a book and try

[42:41] to point to yellow?

[42:44] I had to learn my colors again, you

[42:47] know, and everything takes energy and I

[42:49] didn't have any energy. So, um, uh, I

[42:53] had to let the brain go through its

[42:56] recovery before I can actually regain

[42:59] function. And then because we did do

[43:02] that, then when I did begin to learn, I

[43:05] could learn very quickly.

[43:07] Got it. So, what you said about sleep

[43:11] and having nutritionist foods, it sounds

[43:14] like two recipes to help to keep your

[43:18] brain healthy, if not to help heal your

[43:21] brain. So,

[43:22] and number three and number three,

[43:23] Sherry, let me add movement.

[43:26] Move your body. The body, there is a

[43:30] direct correlation between the amount of

[43:33] movement we have in our body and how

[43:35] close we are to death.

[43:38] When we stop moving, we die.

[43:41] So, this is why wearing watches that

[43:43] tells you to stand up every once in a

[43:45] while is so important. You know, got to

[43:48] got to get moving. But, um, I'd like to

[43:51] diving a little bit about sleep because

[43:53] people around me and myself included,

[43:57] women at this age, um, going through

[44:00] pmenopause or menopause,

[44:02] a lot of insomnas. So I have this

[44:05] argument with my friends who are like no

[44:08] sleeping pills because that's addictive

[44:11] that's bad you know it's it's it you

[44:13] know chemicals whereas I sort of feel

[44:17] like well I know if I don't sleep for a

[44:19] couple of days or I don't sleep well it

[44:22] affects my mood. I've had postpartum

[44:25] depression from it. I just would pick

[44:28] the the least of the two evils. To me,

[44:33] having a sleepblade sometimes is more

[44:36] helpful. So, we have this constant

[44:38] debate and while I have you here, I'd

[44:41] like to hear your opinion on that.

[44:43] I think that that you have a third

[44:46] option is to take a real close look at

[44:49] your life and look at the energy that

[44:52] you are putting into your brain and why

[44:56] is your brain wanting to be awake at 2

[44:59] o'lock in the morning

[45:02] probably going to be because you had

[45:04] caffeine after 12 noon or 2 in the

[45:08] afternoon. There should be no caffeine.

[45:11] Pay attention to what you're eating. If

[45:13] you're eating anything that's got sugar

[45:15] in it, what's it going to do? It's going

[45:17] to wire you up. If you're watching

[45:20] dooming doom scrolling through the news

[45:23] and it's upsetting, what's it going to

[45:26] do? It's going to routinize and keep

[45:28] running. So, I'm going to say put

[45:31] yourself for a week of paying really

[45:34] close attention to what are you doing

[45:36] the last six hours before you want to go

[45:39] to bed. Do you have to have on the TV?

[45:42] Do you have to have music in the

[45:44] background? Do you have to what do you

[45:46] have to be doing? You know, what are you

[45:49] doing? And take some responsibility for

[45:53] yourself as a biological creature

[45:55] because you can either put in something

[45:59] that is I don't advise. I'm a PhD. I'm

[46:02] not an MD. So, I'm not a doc who's going

[46:04] to give you a pill. But I'm going to say

[46:07] to you, I'm a I'm a whole brain living

[46:11] whole body person. Look at yourself as

[46:14] this magnificent collection of cells.

[46:18] Did you give them enough movement today

[46:21] so that they are are in the mood to be

[46:24] rested? You know, be tire yourself out

[46:28] and pay very close attention to what

[46:30] you're taking in. Pay very close

[46:33] attention to the light coming in and

[46:36] your circadian rhythm. Pay very close

[46:38] attention to your own emotions and how

[46:42] much time you're spending upset in your

[46:45] character too that just wants to scream

[46:47] all night, make you worry. And character

[46:50] one, I mean, this is one of the beauties

[46:52] of whole brain living is once you know

[46:54] these different parts of yourself, you

[46:56] can say, "Character one, I know you

[46:59] really want to set a plan tonight."

[47:01] Well, I got time in the morning for you

[47:03] to do that. So, we're not going to plan

[47:06] all night long, okay?

[47:08] We're not going to take any notes on our

[47:10] phone in the middle of the night, wake

[47:12] up and make a note. No, you get your

[47:14] time tomorrow morning uninhibited. So,

[47:18] we'll make that plan so we don't have to

[47:20] do it tonight. You're absolutely right.

[47:22] And I love that. It was it's almost a

[47:25] confrontation

[47:27] because everything you said deep down I

[47:30] know to be true but I think this part of

[47:33] my brain is just like efficiency

[47:36] you know let's get to the end the end

[47:39] goal is so that you have enough rest for

[47:41] work tomorrow so all that woo woo you

[47:46] know let's look into yourself stuff

[47:48] that's we don't have time for that

[47:51] right

[47:52] so let's just get on with it. And I

[47:55] think that's very much this part also

[47:57] right now wants to justify my behavior

[48:00] and say, "Hey,

[48:02] let me see if I could get Dr. Joe to

[48:04] endorse this." And of course, you were

[48:06] like, "No,

[48:08] no." So, well, you already said earlier

[48:11] you have a hard time getting into your

[48:12] character three, and you just told us

[48:15] why you have a hard time getting into

[48:17] your character three because your

[48:19] character one thinks it's a waste of

[48:21] time. But you need to inform your

[48:24] character one and let me inform your

[48:26] character one that your character three

[48:29] is your play and it's your power. All

[48:32] character one can do is be efficient.

[48:35] But character three can be loving. It

[48:38] can be supportive of others. It can be

[48:41] joyful. It can be the pause in the push

[48:45] push push. You are not a robot. You need

[48:48] to recognize you are not a robot. And

[48:52] character one plugs in and it says, "I'm

[48:55] plugged in. Efficiency, efficiency,

[48:57] efficiency, efficiency." And then it

[49:00] dies. And what do we do? We go get a new

[49:02] one.

[49:03] Right? You're not that. You are a

[49:06] biological creature. And the joy inside

[49:09] of you, the love inside of you, the

[49:13] experience, the meaning of your life is

[49:17] not in your character one. Your

[49:19] character one is a good operator. you

[49:21] want it. It's a great secretary. There's

[49:24] a fantastic book by Ian McGillst. I

[49:26] don't know if you're familiar with it.

[49:28] It's called The Master and it and his

[49:30] Emissary. And the master is the right

[49:34] hemisphere and his emissary is the tool

[49:38] of the left brain in the world to get

[49:41] stuff done.

[49:43] But the master needs to be your right

[49:47] brain. And the reason why is because

[49:49] that's where your meaning is,

[49:51] right?

[49:52] That's where purpose is. You know, who

[49:54] are you? You are a human woman. You have

[49:58] children. You have a life. You have

[50:02] friends. And the meaning in your life is

[50:04] those relationships.

[50:07] I mean, right now, if you had a typhoon

[50:09] blow through and you lost all the people

[50:12] in your life, but you kept kept your

[50:14] job, where would be the meaning?

[50:16] That's That's

[50:18] the the thing that we need to be

[50:21] reminded of every day. Um so that

[50:24] yoga

[50:25] that's why I try to do yoga. I try to

[50:29] activate this part of my brain and I I

[50:31] honestly think now that I'm my age, I'm

[50:35] 52 and I think I started to see the

[50:38] importance of brain character three and

[50:42] four and understanding how important it

[50:46] is and learning to activate it are quite

[50:50] different. Right. So I think we start on

[50:53] this journey of discovering how to be

[50:56] our whole self and you talk about your

[50:58] work and and and kind of refer to Carl

[51:01] Yun's psychological framework as well

[51:05] and Carl Yun talks about individuation

[51:07] and some other psychologists talk about

[51:10] midlife crisis and before I just always

[51:14] thought midlife crisis or that

[51:17] individuation

[51:18] is triggered by the enough experience

[51:21] experiences we had in the world um where

[51:24] we start to understand and know that we

[51:28] are both part of the world but also

[51:31] different.

[51:32] So at a certain age you want to become

[51:34] whole and an individual but just not

[51:37] part of that culture one culture. But

[51:42] I'm wondering if it has something to do

[51:45] with our brain and how our brain age or

[51:49] matures that triggers us into that

[51:53] midlife crisis state that we start to

[51:56] re-evaluate and rethink or learn to want

[52:00] to activate our right brain.

[52:04] Well, first of all, I I do believe and I

[52:06] rarely ever say this, but I do believe

[52:09] there are gender differences in what's

[52:12] happening for midlife crisis between

[52:14] males and females.

[52:15] Oh, love to hear about that.

[52:17] Well, you know, the left brain, males

[52:21] tend to have stronger left brains. The,

[52:24] you know, the engineering brain, the

[52:26] hierarchy, the value of of

[52:28] individuality, the value of me and mine.

[52:31] I'm going to fight you for for mine. The

[52:34] tribal, the waring, you know, I mean,

[52:37] that's all very masculine kinds of

[52:39] things. It's me and mine or or not. And

[52:42] women have more fibers running between

[52:47] the two hemispheres, you know, and some

[52:49] of the descriptions by some of the

[52:51] different psychologists that I've heard

[52:52] over the years is is that the male was

[52:54] the one that went out and he had to

[52:57] bring home the meat. And so he had to go

[53:00] out and he had an arrow and he had an

[53:03] animal and he had to wait and pinpoint

[53:07] the animal and get the animal and do

[53:10] what boys do, right? Uh in the meantime,

[53:13] the girls are at home watching the kids

[53:15] and the kids are everywhere. kids are

[53:17] running in the forest and we need girls,

[53:20] we need to know which bushes have uh uh

[53:23] things that are edible and things that

[53:25] are going to kill our children, right?

[53:28] So, so we have to have both where are my

[53:31] children and the bigger picture of the

[53:34] homestead. So, we're more naturally more

[53:38] fibers running between the two

[53:40] hemispheres. So, there are some real

[53:43] biological differences. I um I I'm not

[53:46] going to speak to what the males do when

[53:48] they go through their midlife crisis

[53:50] because I'm not a male and I haven't had

[53:51] that experience. But as I work with

[53:54] women, um and having been a a woman

[53:57] going through process, you know, there's

[53:59] something about being a woman, having

[54:02] children,

[54:04] uh running the nest, being in my

[54:06] character one because I've got I'm in

[54:08] charge. I've got to organize the food.

[54:11] I've got to organize every detail of

[54:14] every child, you know, and I gota I just

[54:16] gota I gota I gotta and so character one

[54:20] needs to come online. There needs to be

[54:22] a plan and uh and then we give, you

[54:25] know, dad his lunch and say go be a

[54:28] warrior in the world and bring home the

[54:30] meat, right? Whatever. So, but we women,

[54:33] we're about the nest. And so we do the

[54:35] nest and then you know we reach what 40

[54:38] and the kids are starting to go out of

[54:40] the nest and as that happens we we go

[54:44] through a real process of the empty

[54:47] nest. I mean, there's there's what are

[54:49] we losing, but also what are we gaining?

[54:51] And what we're gaining is a little bit

[54:53] more time, a little bit more freedom to

[54:56] put our energy into. Well, well, you

[54:58] know, before I had kids, how many times

[55:00] have we said that? Well, before we I had

[55:03] kids, I used to love to sing in a choir

[55:05] or I used to like um uh do a sport or I

[55:10] used to love to do yoga. You know, what

[55:13] was it that I I used to do before I had

[55:16] kids? and I sacrificed everything. So

[55:19] then we start doing more of those things

[55:22] and there's something that happens at

[55:23] the age 50. Uh when women turn 50, it's

[55:27] like, you know, I've been on this planet

[55:29] a half a century and now it is time for

[55:31] me to do what I feel I need to do,

[55:34] right? I've done that. I'm done with

[55:36] that. I don't have grandb babies yet

[55:39] probably yet. Uh so I got time to focus

[55:42] on what do I want to do? How do I want

[55:45] to put my mark on life that is mine, not

[55:49] just of my children or of my spouse?

[55:52] And so we become more more

[55:55] purposedriven, which is more character

[55:58] 4. and and so and embodying that more as

[56:03] character 3 because as character 3 now

[56:05] now we start going to conferences or

[56:08] going to retreats or going to sessions

[56:12] where we're hanging out with other women

[56:15] finding meaning in as women what are we

[56:19] how do we bring the power of all these

[56:22] skills that we've developed over our

[56:24] lifetime and by the time we reach 60 we

[56:27] are really on tread. I mean we are

[56:30] moving right along. And so there is this

[56:34] shift of what is my priority? How do I

[56:36] want to spend my time? Who do I want to

[56:39] be? How do I want to be in the world? Uh

[56:42] and then you know grandb babies start

[56:44] popping out and that becomes a piece of

[56:46] joy. But we have more access to joy at

[56:50] about the time the little joy balls come

[56:53] in that we get to then send home when

[56:55] we're done with them. Right. So, so we

[56:58] we actually go through these cycles

[57:00] through these different decades of our

[57:03] lives and early 40s is a tough one.

[57:06] Yeah. Early 40s definitely.

[57:09] Yeah. Late 30s, early 40s is uh you know

[57:12] menopause is now let me say this about

[57:14] menopause having being a neuroanatomist,

[57:18] a cellular worshipper of what I am as a

[57:22] biological creature. I'm going to

[57:25] encourage any woman who is having hot

[57:27] flashes to instead of just think, "Oh,

[57:32] dear God, another one." I want you to

[57:33] think about where is it starting in your

[57:35] body? How do you know you're going to

[57:37] flash? And different women will flash in

[57:40] different ways. And it'll start, you'll

[57:43] start feeling the rumble of energy

[57:46] inside of like your spine or in your

[57:48] belly or in your thighs. Some women have

[57:51] it in their thighs. Um, some women have

[57:54] it in their necks and then it's an

[57:56] explosion. Watch it. Pay attention to

[57:59] it. It is a fascinating physiological

[58:03] experience. And I can guarantee you that

[58:06] if you look at it with that kind of

[58:09] loving admiration of what you are

[58:12] capable of, then it makes it a whole lot

[58:16] more palatable. And then it gets to the

[58:18] point where you're actually kind of

[58:19] looking forward to it because it's like

[58:21] and then there I get that prickliness in

[58:24] the back of my neck and then it's like

[58:26] the hair on the back of my hair just

[58:28] explodes and because now you're

[58:30] analyzing it it's like oh give me a new

[58:32] one. I missed something. You know what I

[58:34] mean? Um it's a completely different

[58:37] perspective.

[58:38] Thank you so much because you made

[58:40] menopause sound like fun that symptom.

[58:43] Oh, I had a I had and I had serious hot

[58:47] flashes. Uh, so it was like either they

[58:50] were going to win or I was going to win.

[58:52] And it was like um I was going to win

[58:55] because I it's like my body you take

[58:59] care take out some hormones in my body

[59:03] and and the whole thing

[59:07] erupts like a volcano and it's like let

[59:10] it let it explode. let it go. Don't try

[59:14] to hold it in because um you know, as

[59:16] soon as you try to bypass or be negative

[59:21] toward it, then you're just having a

[59:24] horrible day. So, right. No, I encourage

[59:27] people to really embrace it. Pay

[59:29] attention to it. Compare with your pals.

[59:32] You know, when I have one, uh it

[59:34] explodes literally on my on my back. My

[59:38] whole back explodes. And other people

[59:40] it'll explode out their heads and and

[59:43] some people put your hand on your head

[59:45] and try to like like act like it's a

[59:47] funnel and just let that energy out

[59:49] because that's all it is. It's just

[59:51] energy. Work with it. You can work

[59:54] against it

[59:55] as a little character two or you can

[59:57] really welcome it with enthusiasm as a

[01:00:00] character three and then just be a

[01:00:02] character four and say, "Oh my god, I'm

[01:00:05] alive. I made it to menopause. Wow." Oh,

[01:00:09] that's a wonderful way to look at it.

[01:00:13] Um, fortunately and unfortunately, I

[01:00:15] never had that symptom. So, I thought I

[01:00:18] was getting away with menopause

[01:00:21] scot-free until I realized all the other

[01:00:24] stuff, right? Skin irritation, vertigo,

[01:00:27] frozen shoulder, all of that. Had no

[01:00:31] idea. I just thought I hurt myself doing

[01:00:34] weightlifting, yoga, or whatnot.

[01:00:37] vertigo, maybe I didn't sleep well.

[01:00:40] I did not realize it until way after

[01:00:43] that. They were all symptoms. Yeah.

[01:00:45] So, um, but thank you for explaining

[01:00:48] that because I do have friends who are

[01:00:50] currently going through that

[01:00:52] and it is to them it's a horrible

[01:00:54] experience.

[01:00:56] But you made it sound so wonderful and

[01:00:59] that sort of it's a reminder whatever we

[01:01:02] go through if we can activate character

[01:01:05] number four

[01:01:07] and just watch it in awe because I'm

[01:01:10] alive. I'm able to experience this and

[01:01:13] it is beautiful. It is part of the

[01:01:16] process. If we could just activate that

[01:01:20] um we would see things differently.

[01:01:23] Um so there are techniques you talk

[01:01:25] about in your book. You have a a 90

[01:01:28] second rule and you have an acronym

[01:01:30] brain. I find them very helpful. So can

[01:01:34] you quickly explain it to um our

[01:01:37] viewers? But I do want them to to get

[01:01:39] your book to get the the details and

[01:01:42] learn to practice it daily.

[01:01:44] Yeah. The beauty of the book is that

[01:01:46] those chapters that are there's a whole

[01:01:49] chapter on character one. It's written

[01:01:51] by character one. Character one respects

[01:01:53] itself. It's you'll know your character

[01:01:56] one. Name it. Know who that is. Know

[01:01:59] your character two. Know your character

[01:02:02] three. What does it feel like inside of

[01:02:04] your body? And then what is character

[01:02:06] four? And I particularly I don't know

[01:02:08] what it's like in your translation, but

[01:02:10] when I wrote character for chapter in

[01:02:13] English, oh my god, I went there and I

[01:02:16] became that and that's who wrote that

[01:02:19] chapter. So it was really beautiful. Um

[01:02:22] so so the the 90 rule is that you know

[01:02:26] at any moment in time we're doing one of

[01:02:29] three things. One, we are having

[01:02:31] thoughts jittering through our brain. we

[01:02:34] are experiencing emotions flitting

[01:02:36] through us or we are having a

[01:02:38] physiological response to what we are

[01:02:42] thinking or what we're feeling. That's

[01:02:44] all that's ever going on in there

[01:02:46] really. So if I think a thought, let's

[01:02:49] say I'm going to think a thought of

[01:02:50] someone who uh 30 years they did me

[01:02:53] wrong. And every time I think of that

[01:02:56] person, it turns on my anger. I just I

[01:02:59] hold a grudge. I feel resentment. I'm

[01:03:02] just all stirred back up in my little

[01:03:05] character two negative energy toward

[01:03:07] that and then I'm having some

[01:03:09] physiological response dump into my

[01:03:12] bloodstream. It floods through me. It

[01:03:14] flushes out of me in less than 90

[01:03:17] seconds.

[01:03:18] Okay. So from the moment I think a

[01:03:20] thought, it stimulates an emotion like

[01:03:23] rage, like anger or fear, adrenaline or

[01:03:26] no adrenaline gets dumped into my

[01:03:29] bloodstream. It floods through me. I

[01:03:32] have that emotion and then within 90

[01:03:35] seconds it's gone. So what that means

[01:03:37] it's called the 90 second rule. So if

[01:03:40] you know that you run in 90 second

[01:03:43] circuits 90 second periods of time the

[01:03:46] next time you feel yourself emotionally

[01:03:49] triggered look at your watch and watch

[01:03:52] it. You'll see literally within 90

[01:03:56] seconds it'll be gone flush through you.

[01:03:59] Now, I say look at your watch because

[01:04:02] then you become the observer

[01:04:05] watching the circuit, letting it do what

[01:04:08] it's doing instead of rethinking the

[01:04:11] thought about that person that still

[01:04:13] stimulates that anger. So, you know,

[01:04:16] because I know your audience is saying,

[01:04:17] "Oh, no. I can stay angry for a whole

[01:04:19] lot longer than 90 seconds." But think

[01:04:22] about it when you're doing it. Watch

[01:04:24] yourself. you're rethinking the thoughts

[01:04:26] that are then restimulating that. And so

[01:04:29] you're running another 90-cond loop.

[01:04:32] And um and so then let's say I haven't

[01:04:34] thought about that person in in a couple

[01:04:37] of years. And then boom, all of a sudden

[01:04:39] I think of that person and bam, there we

[01:04:42] go again, you know, and it's just like

[01:04:44] circuitry. That's what we are. We are

[01:04:46] this magnificent collection of cells.

[01:04:50] And every ability we have is because we

[01:04:53] have brain cells that perform that

[01:04:55] function.

[01:04:56] So I can get angry because I have

[01:04:59] circuitry in my brain that knows what

[01:05:03] that is in my body. Um just like joy.

[01:05:07] Same thing for joy. When was the last

[01:05:09] time you had a belly laugh? And time it.

[01:05:11] There's no way your belly laugh is going

[01:05:13] to last uh more than 90 seconds unless

[01:05:16] you keep giggling with the person and

[01:05:19] reiterating what it is you're giggling

[01:05:22] about.

[01:05:23] So when we are triggered, especially

[01:05:26] when we talk about childhood trauma, in

[01:05:28] your example, you know, 30 years ago,

[01:05:31] someone did me wrong. And so something a

[01:05:35] picture of that person or seeing that

[01:05:38] person again triggers number two, right?

[01:05:41] And so when that does happen, put a stop

[01:05:45] to it and let it run its course for 90

[01:05:48] seconds. and

[01:05:49] let it runs its course. Unless unless

[01:05:51] you want to be miserable for a while. I

[01:05:54] mean, the thing about misery is it's

[01:05:55] addictive, right? Character 2 loves

[01:05:58] being miserable. That's what it does. It

[01:06:02] loves being addicted. It loves craving.

[01:06:06] It loves its past trauma because that's

[01:06:09] what it is.

[01:06:10] So,

[01:06:11] so it's not going to heal itself. And

[01:06:14] you will never heal that trauma.

[01:06:18] it cannot heal its trauma. What we can

[01:06:20] do is we can use character one to come

[01:06:23] in and love or to support and say,

[01:06:26] "Okay, Jill, uh, you're addicted to

[01:06:29] cigarettes, so we're not going to buy

[01:06:31] any cigarettes, and we're not going to

[01:06:32] keep them around the house, and we're

[01:06:34] not going to ask other people if we can

[01:06:36] bum a cigarette. We're going to nip it

[01:06:38] in the bud." So, character one comes in

[01:06:40] and says, "Here's the new rules we're

[01:06:42] going to work inside of." Because that's

[01:06:44] what it does, and I'm going to set you

[01:06:46] up for success, and we're not going to

[01:06:48] have cigarettes in the house. And then

[01:06:50] character four comes in and says, "Oh

[01:06:52] gosh, little character two, I know that

[01:06:54] craving, it is so powerful, isn't it?

[01:06:58] Where do we feel it? Oh my gosh, we feel

[01:07:00] it in our belly." And and and then what

[01:07:03] do we do when we feel it in our belly?

[01:07:05] Because every time we have a thought or

[01:07:07] a feeling doesn't mean we have to act on

[01:07:09] it. It just means we're capable of

[01:07:12] having it. And so it's like, okay, how

[01:07:15] long does a craving last? Generally less

[01:07:18] than 90 seconds because it's a cellular

[01:07:21] circuit. Now, if I keep thinking about

[01:07:22] that cigarette or I hang out with other

[01:07:25] people who are smoking and blowing that

[01:07:26] into my face or I smell it on my clothes

[01:07:30] and I thought that that was a good

[01:07:31] smell, then you know it's like, oh, I

[01:07:33] want more of that. So, what do we do? We

[01:07:36] go back to character one and say,

[01:07:38] "Character one, we're not going to hang

[01:07:39] out with these people anymore for a

[01:07:41] while or they're going to go out and

[01:07:42] they're going to have a smoke break and

[01:07:44] then they're going to brush their teeth

[01:07:45] when they come back in or we're not

[01:07:47] going to hang out with them for a few

[01:07:48] weeks." So, I think that's very

[01:07:50] interesting because you asked us to name

[01:07:52] all four parts of our brains. So, they

[01:07:54] each have a character. So when that when

[01:07:58] you are so miserable and you think

[01:08:01] you're the victim of your circumstances

[01:08:04] and I think a lot of people do and

[01:08:06] they're stuck in their trauma. It's not

[01:08:09] that we're not acknowledging you have

[01:08:11] trauma

[01:08:12] or that we're victim blaming,

[01:08:15] but you're saying understand your

[01:08:18] hardware because you can activate

[01:08:20] different parts of your brain to work

[01:08:22] together to pull yourself out of it and

[01:08:25] you are not defined by your trauma.

[01:08:28] Because I think people who are there

[01:08:31] just stuck in their trauma, they may not

[01:08:35] necessarily have their brains user

[01:08:37] manual

[01:08:38] to know how to get out of that. And and

[01:08:41] that also speaks to substance abuse.

[01:08:43] Simple things you can do is one, stop

[01:08:45] talking about it

[01:08:48] because you're just rerunning the

[01:08:50] circuit. And the thing about circuits is

[01:08:51] the more you run them, the more they be

[01:08:53] the stronger they get, the more they run

[01:08:55] on their own as habitual thinking and

[01:08:58] feeling. So stop talking about your

[01:09:01] trauma. We are all traumatized just

[01:09:04] coming out of the womb. Oh my god.

[01:09:07] Imagine from being a single cell to two

[01:09:10] cells to four cells to eight cells to 50

[01:09:13] trillion cells for over nine months. I'm

[01:09:16] in my mother's womb. I'm protected from

[01:09:20] the light and the sounds and the touch

[01:09:23] and I have this beautiful heartbeat as

[01:09:25] the soundtrack of my existence. And then

[01:09:28] I'm born and bam, in that moment we all

[01:09:32] get our trauma circuitry turned on. And

[01:09:35] then we're just constantly being

[01:09:37] retraumatized by other stuff. Now your

[01:09:40] trauma may have been horrific in

[01:09:43] comparison to my trauma and for that I

[01:09:46] am so sorry. But you are not your

[01:09:50] trauma. Your trauma is information now

[01:09:54] that your brain can use to say, I'm

[01:09:57] going to protect myself now as best I

[01:10:00] can from having that retraumatized

[01:10:04] and I'm going to use the other parts of

[01:10:06] my brain to hold me as a team because

[01:10:10] I'm not just little Jill trauma in here.

[01:10:13] I've got character one and that girl,

[01:10:16] man, she's a monster. And I got

[01:10:18] character four, and oh my god, she's the

[01:10:21] love of the universe. And oh my god, I

[01:10:23] got character three, and she is so much

[01:10:26] interesting, fun, and excitement. Okay,

[01:10:29] team, hold me in my trauma,

[01:10:34] and lift me out of it so that I can look

[01:10:37] at it and use it for information and not

[01:10:40] make it a lifestyle.

[01:10:42] Right? So, at first when you first said

[01:10:44] it, let's move on and stop talking about

[01:10:47] trauma. And in my head, I'm thinking,

[01:10:48] well, that's a little bit different or

[01:10:51] the opposite of what psychotherapy is

[01:10:54] about. A lot of it,

[01:10:56] so the opposite. I am not. Whole brain

[01:10:58] living is not therapy,

[01:11:00] right?

[01:11:00] Let's be clear. This is the neuroanatomy

[01:11:03] of your brain.

[01:11:04] And you have these four parts and you're

[01:11:07] supposed to be using them. That's the

[01:11:09] evolution of humanity and what we're

[01:11:12] doing as a society, as a world society

[01:11:15] now. And it used to be I don't know how

[01:11:17] much of this came from the western, but

[01:11:19] the western world shifted into a

[01:11:22] leftbrain dominant value structure. And

[01:11:25] that's going to be character one and

[01:11:26] character two. So that's all hierarchy.

[01:11:30] And character two is alone and in pain.

[01:11:32] And character one is more, more, more. I

[01:11:34] want, I want, I want. I value money. and

[01:11:36] I value uh stuff over materialism over

[01:11:40] life and and and capitalism and all

[01:11:44] those wonderful things. Well, they are

[01:11:46] wonderful when they're in balance,

[01:11:48] but we're not in balance,

[01:11:50] right?

[01:11:50] And so what what whole brain living does

[01:11:52] is it says this is not therapy.

[01:11:55] Psychoanalysis goes in and it's going to

[01:11:57] analyze to death your trauma. Well, your

[01:12:00] trauma is not your character too cannot

[01:12:03] heal itself. It cannot do that.

[01:12:06] because that that's not what it is. It

[01:12:09] is the trauma.

[01:12:12] Let the trauma be okay.

[01:12:15] I'm asking us to be grateful that we

[01:12:18] have trauma

[01:12:21] because it is through the trauma that we

[01:12:24] can reflect and grow. If we don't have

[01:12:28] trauma, we're not going to grow. Trauma

[01:12:31] has come and gone.

[01:12:33] Come and gone. It's not now. It's not

[01:12:36] now. I don't want to be laying on my

[01:12:39] deathbed

[01:12:41] with nothing left in my left brain

[01:12:44] because my world is now on my last few

[01:12:47] breaths

[01:12:48] and think to myself, I just spent the

[01:12:51] last 50 years of my life all about

[01:12:55] something that happened 50 years ago and

[01:12:58] I missed my life. the present

[01:13:02] I was told about. Yes. I kept going back

[01:13:06] into the pain. The pain

[01:13:10] we're we're programmed for the pain. We

[01:13:12] experience trauma because we're

[01:13:14] programmed for it. Well, what good does

[01:13:16] it do us? It's information.

[01:13:19] Whatever those circumstances were, it

[01:13:22] was information and it's come and gone

[01:13:25] and it's now behind us. But it sells in

[01:13:28] circuit. So the more I run that circuit,

[01:13:31] and this is what I have against against

[01:13:33] psychoanalysis, is if you keep taking me

[01:13:36] back into my trauma, you're making it

[01:13:39] stronger again.

[01:13:42] And and it's not supposed to be. I'm not

[01:13:44] supposed to go back and remember all the

[01:13:46] horrible things that happened to me when

[01:13:48] I was a child. What I'm supposed to do

[01:13:50] is recognize that that happened. And

[01:13:54] what can I do now to learn from that to

[01:13:57] set myself up for a non-traumatic

[01:14:01] current present moment experience

[01:14:04] that's closer to Adleran. It's I'm not

[01:14:07] trapped in the past, but I do recognize

[01:14:10] it did happen as opposed to I don't want

[01:14:12] to think about it. It I'm going to try

[01:14:14] to block it up.

[01:14:16] I mean, look at my experience. All

[01:14:17] right, here I was brain scientist at

[01:14:20] Harvard, top of my game, Golden Girl,

[01:14:22] climbing the ladder. Everything was

[01:14:24] fantastic. And then boom, within four

[01:14:26] hours, I am uh completely vegetative

[01:14:31] with a major hemorrhage in the left half

[01:14:33] of my brain. You know, wow, if that

[01:14:35] wasn't a blow to the ego, right? Because

[01:14:37] now I'm completely non-functional. I

[01:14:39] don't remember anything about anything

[01:14:41] and all I have is the present moment and

[01:14:44] my whole life just got destroyed.

[01:14:47] Right?

[01:14:48] I'm just perfect and whole and beautiful

[01:14:52] just the way that I am. And I'm not what

[01:14:56] that used to be anymore. But I'm okay

[01:14:59] with that. And I'm willing to look at

[01:15:02] those brain cells and say, "What do you

[01:15:04] need in order to heal and recover?"

[01:15:10] If I focus on the trauma, I'll never get

[01:15:12] past the trauma to the heal.

[01:15:15] Right? want to hear,

[01:15:17] right? No, that you bring a very

[01:15:19] important point and I think it's going

[01:15:22] to be tough for my audience and my

[01:15:25] viewers to hear, but it is something

[01:15:27] that we need to hear because it's in

[01:15:30] this day and age.

[01:15:32] But that's the power of knowing whole

[01:15:33] brain living,

[01:15:34] right?

[01:15:35] If I know what my choice is, my trauma

[01:15:38] is my trauma. Okay, let's say I had a

[01:15:41] terrible, terrible trauma, years,

[01:15:44] decades of trauma in my life. But this

[01:15:47] evening, I've been invited to dinner

[01:15:50] with you at a nice restaurant, and

[01:15:53] you're going to introduce me to some of

[01:15:55] your favorite foods, and we're going to

[01:15:58] get to know one another. For this

[01:16:00] evening, I can make the decision to set

[01:16:03] my trauma aside.

[01:16:06] It's still there. It's still a part of

[01:16:09] me. But tonight, I'm going to step into

[01:16:12] the other parts of my brain and be

[01:16:15] present with you.

[01:16:18] That's the beauty of our trauma. It's

[01:16:20] not right here, right now. It will

[01:16:24] always be in formation for me. It will

[01:16:27] always be a way for me to hook into and

[01:16:31] feel that pain in an instant. But right

[01:16:34] now, I'm going to set that aside and I'm

[01:16:38] not going to worry about it and I'm not

[01:16:39] going to think about it and I'm not

[01:16:41] gonna fuel it. I'm gonna go out and I'm

[01:16:44] going to have a lovely evening with you

[01:16:46] and then we might take in a show or go

[01:16:49] out afterwards and it's like, "Oh my

[01:16:51] gosh, I just had six hours without my

[01:16:54] trauma or my worrying worry." So, how

[01:16:57] many of us are worriers? It's like,

[01:16:59] well, worry is a waste of your energy.

[01:17:02] So, I'm going to set my worry aside

[01:17:05] because you don't want me to sit there

[01:17:06] over dinner and tell you all about my

[01:17:08] trauma and all about my worry. You want

[01:17:10] me to tell you the exciting things in my

[01:17:13] life that bring me life

[01:17:17] because you want to share life with me

[01:17:19] and then you're going to share your life

[01:17:21] stories with me. And it doesn't all have

[01:17:24] to focus on the trauma. And if by chance

[01:17:28] in that evening a topic comes up and

[01:17:32] something triggers your trauma then use

[01:17:34] the 90 second rules.

[01:17:36] Well the 90 second rule. Yeah. I mean we

[01:17:39] are making choices all the time either

[01:17:41] consciously or unconsciously. And it's

[01:17:44] like, well, in this moment, do I want to

[01:17:46] ruin this evening now and go into all

[01:17:49] that dribble uh that just is on

[01:17:52] automatic for me because it was 40 years

[01:17:54] ago or am I going to stay conscious with

[01:17:58] you and present and right here right now

[01:18:01] and make a connection in the present

[01:18:04] moment? That's the difference between

[01:18:05] the right hemisphere and the left

[01:18:07] hemisphere. And that may be the best

[01:18:09] easiest way for people to manage

[01:18:12] themselves. How much time are you

[01:18:14] spending in the past? How much time are

[01:18:17] you spending worrying about the future?

[01:18:19] And how much time are you actually

[01:18:21] connecting with another human being in

[01:18:24] the present moment, not running on

[01:18:27] automatic being present and open and

[01:18:32] vulnerable and curious. So, so I think

[01:18:36] most people have a hard time doing that

[01:18:38] when number two is in charge and that

[01:18:42] the

[01:18:42] by definition

[01:18:44] so we're basically this book and I think

[01:18:46] it's wonderful is that in our society or

[01:18:50] I think the trend is now when number two

[01:18:52] is in charge and you feel all sorts of

[01:18:54] emotions is not to deny it and not to

[01:18:58] suppress it but we're thinking of it

[01:19:01] differently. It's you don't have to give

[01:19:04] it the light,

[01:19:05] right? It's not suppressing it, per se.

[01:19:08] It's that it's not the time or place to

[01:19:12] shine a light on it.

[01:19:14] Yeah.

[01:19:14] Um it's there. It's part of us.

[01:19:18] It does not It's important part, right?

[01:19:21] Because because of that because that

[01:19:24] happened, you will never catch me in

[01:19:26] that situation again.

[01:19:28] I can learn because of it. I have to

[01:19:31] have those what we would call negative

[01:19:33] experiences in order to know. Here's an

[01:19:36] easy example.

[01:19:38] If I'm just in the happy go-lucky

[01:19:40] present moment of my character three, uh

[01:19:43] the ball runs out goes out into the

[01:19:45] street. I'm chasing the ball out into

[01:19:47] the street. But because I have a

[01:19:49] character two, I know that I don't want

[01:19:52] to run out into that street because

[01:19:54] there's a bus coming and the bus and and

[01:19:57] my life are not compatible, right? So, I

[01:20:00] need that information. It's important

[01:20:02] information. All the trauma, it's

[01:20:05] important information for me to learn

[01:20:07] from, but I don't need to keep bringing

[01:20:10] it back up into my conversation and my

[01:20:13] present moment. I don't need to do that.

[01:20:16] Now, I can in an instant because it's

[01:20:19] always right there,

[01:20:21] but do I want to or do I want to give

[01:20:23] the microphone to where I go for yoga?

[01:20:27] Right? So looping back to what we talked

[01:20:29] about in the very beginning of the new

[01:20:32] generation of of kids, they're very

[01:20:35] resistant in labeling, right? Everything

[01:20:38] is fluid. They don't want structure. But

[01:20:41] at the same time, so I think that's a

[01:20:43] pro. That's their rebellion against the

[01:20:47] solid, rigid structure. But at the same

[01:20:50] time, you can see it in their

[01:20:53] vernacular. You know, they're triggered

[01:20:56] a lot. So they like to talk about how

[01:20:59] they're triggered and that's the number

[01:21:02] two brain. So you you said you want to

[01:21:05] talk about why that is happening. And so

[01:21:07] we're very curious why you think that's

[01:21:10] a new phenomenon for like the new

[01:21:12] generations

[01:21:13] because

[01:21:15] So I'm a boomer. I'm 66 years old. I'm

[01:21:17] near the tail end of a of the boomers.

[01:21:20] Uh you're how

[01:21:22] X. I'm 52. I'm a Gen X. And boy are you

[01:21:26] ever, you know, the Gen X is that alpha

[01:21:30] type personality.

[01:21:32] Boom, go digital world.

[01:21:36] Do it. You know, I've never met a Gen

[01:21:39] Xer that wasn't a success. Seriously,

[01:21:42] because that was just part of that's how

[01:21:44] they were wired. They were not afraid of

[01:21:47] technology. The boomers were terrified

[01:21:50] of technology, right? Especially if I'm

[01:21:53] not so much, but I'm at the tail end and

[01:21:56] I'm smart enough to know if I don't know

[01:21:58] technology, I lose my world, right? I

[01:22:01] get left behind. But the 70 year olds,

[01:22:04] the 80 year olds, the 90 year olds, they

[01:22:06] they're terrified of, oh my god, if I

[01:22:09] push the wrong button, I'm going to wipe

[01:22:11] out my hard drive and everything's going

[01:22:13] to explode. Because that's how it used

[01:22:15] to be

[01:22:17] the early days, right?

[01:22:18] I remember that. I mean, it was

[01:22:20] terrifying to push the wrong button. So,

[01:22:23] so we don't do that. But Gen X come

[01:22:25] along and they say, "Oh, just push the

[01:22:27] buttons. Figure it out." You know, the

[01:22:28] only way to figure it out is push the

[01:22:30] buttons. And they were not afraid of the

[01:22:32] buttons because by your generation, they

[01:22:34] had fixed it so that it didn't all get

[01:22:36] exploded, right? It was just cool. So

[01:22:40] you guys, but you learned mathematics is

[01:22:43] 2 + 2 equals 4 and 4 + 4 equals 8. Well,

[01:22:47] that's a very leftbrain training. So,

[01:22:51] you learned all these different skill

[01:22:54] sets, leftrain and rightbrain skill sets

[01:22:57] using leftbrain dominant teaching

[01:23:00] because we the boomers, that's all we

[01:23:03] had and that's how we taught and that's

[01:23:06] how we learned. Okay. So, then the

[01:23:08] boomers end up having the millennials

[01:23:11] and so and you have you're like gen a

[01:23:15] alpha, right? I have I have one kid that

[01:23:18] would be Gen Elver and the other two I

[01:23:21] would say Gen Z.

[01:23:24] Gen Z, right?

[01:23:25] Gen Z. Yeah.

[01:23:26] Okay. So, we the boomers were like

[01:23:29] playing with all this technology and

[01:23:31] then you guys who are really good with

[01:23:33] technology, you're playing with

[01:23:35] technology and somebody comes up with

[01:23:37] this little teddy bear that that

[01:23:40] snuggles and talks and makes sound. Yes.

[01:23:42] And so we all think, "Oh, we're going to

[01:23:44] take this little teddy and we're going

[01:23:46] to put it in the the crib of our babies

[01:23:49] who are the millennials." And then

[01:23:51] everybody after that gets more

[01:23:53] sophisticated, right? So our

[01:23:55] millennials, their first significant

[01:23:57] relationship as infants is with a robot.

[01:24:02] A robot that communicates in robotish

[01:24:06] like things, right? And then and then we

[01:24:09] give them these little computers and we

[01:24:13] teach them that two chickens and two

[01:24:16] roosters make four mammals.

[01:24:20] Well, that's very right brain. That's

[01:24:21] not 2 plus two equals four, which is

[01:24:24] leftrain training. Now we're training

[01:24:27] them leftrain skills using right.

[01:24:32] So millennials are rightrain dominant.

[01:24:36] Oh, that's

[01:24:38] and then everybody after them is right

[01:24:41] brain dominant because of technology. So

[01:24:44] in the book, one of my last chapters is

[01:24:46] over the last hundred years of tech, how

[01:24:50] technology has impacted the brain, the

[01:24:54] human brain, and h and these different

[01:24:56] generations, and why there's such a miss

[01:24:59] between the boomers and the gen Xers,

[01:25:03] you guys, and then the millennials and

[01:25:06] everybody after. So now you say to me

[01:25:09] your language is now they are um they

[01:25:14] don't want to be identified

[01:25:17] left brain they don't want they want

[01:25:19] things to be fluid right brain they

[01:25:22] don't want to be whatever rule boxes

[01:25:26] left brain um and so so that's what

[01:25:30] they're rebelling against and when

[01:25:31] they're triggered we all still have a

[01:25:33] character too so they still have that

[01:25:36] right

[01:25:37] And to some to some extent by that

[01:25:39] explanation the oh I'm triggered and

[01:25:42] everyone's okay with it. It's number

[01:25:45] three and four like oh let that person

[01:25:48] be present and and and it's fine like

[01:25:52] being triggered is okay. There's no

[01:25:54] structure. You can be triggered

[01:25:56] judgment. Um there's no judgment.

[01:25:58] Exactly.

[01:25:59] No negative judgment because it's

[01:26:01] character one that's going to negatively

[01:26:03] judge and say that's not appropriate

[01:26:05] behavior.

[01:26:06] Right. Right. That is fascinating. Thank

[01:26:08] you so much for helping us understand

[01:26:11] our brain and because only by

[01:26:14] understanding it can we learn how to use

[01:26:17] it properly and really design or

[01:26:22] intentionally live the life that we

[01:26:24] want.

[01:26:25] Um like you said by understanding our

[01:26:27] hardware. We got to know our hardware

[01:26:29] right. So thank you. Thank you so much

[01:26:32] Dr. Jill. This has been very helpful

[01:26:35] conversation and your book it's it's

[01:26:38] helped me a lot as well. So thank you so

[01:26:41] much. Thank you Sher. Thank you

[01:26:42] everybody. All right.