# What Are Soft Skills? Top 8

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hZSARM4VaVs

[00:00] what are soft skills in the workplace?
[00:03] what are soft skills in the workplace?
[00:05] we're going to look at the top eight soft skills that cut across most professional situations.
[00:09] professional situations.
[00:13] one way to understand what soft skills are is by looking at hard skills.
[00:17] these are job specific technical skills.
[00:20] so if you're a software developer your hard skills are your ability to program.
[00:25] if you're an accountant it's your ability to do your clients taxes.
[00:30] every area of specialty comes with certain expectations for technical knowledge and hands-on skills.
[00:36] in contrast soft skills are more general and cut across most types of jobs.
[00:42] soft skills are essentially your ability to work well with others.
[00:45] when a physician takes the time to connect with other doctors with a professional attitude and talk to nurses in supportive ways and really listen to patients.
[00:56] those physicians are
[01:00] physicians are building relationships through their soft skills.
[01:03] When I do consulting and workshops, the most common problem I see is that most of my clients are smart.
[01:08] They are competent, but they have underdeveloped soft skills, and it's holding them back.
[01:14] So, two resources I would suggest are on my website.
[01:19] I have classes at the Communication Coach Academy.
[01:21] Then there's always at least one free class there.
[01:23] I also have a free PDF download on the five essential communication skills that every professional should have.
[01:33] I'll put links to those in the description below the video.
[01:36] To prepare for this video, I looked at five different online articles on soft skills until I started to see clear overlap.
[01:45] Links to those articles are in the description below.
[01:47] And I stopped at five articles because they all started to mention the same skills.
[01:54] I then boiled down those separate lists into the eight most commonly mentioned soft skills across those lists.
[01:59] So roughly speaking, I list these in
[02:02] So roughly speaking, I list these in order of priority.
[02:03] Order of priority based upon those lists and also my own.
[02:06] Based upon those lists and also my own professional experience.
[02:07] Professional experience working with clients in corporate.
[02:09] Working with clients in corporate settings, so here's the list.
[02:10] Settings, so here's the list. Number one, the top soft skill on almost.
[02:13] Number one, the top soft skill on almost every list is leadership.
[02:15] Every list is leadership. Now granted, you could say that all of.
[02:17] Now granted, you could say that all of these soft skills are.
[02:18] These soft skills are part of leadership, and that's accurate.
[02:21] Part of leadership, and that's accurate in one sense, but.
[02:22] In one sense, but here we're talking about perhaps the.
[02:24] Here we're talking about perhaps the difference between.
[02:25] Difference between management and leadership. Managing.
[02:29] Management and leadership. Managing in many ways is about maintaining the.
[02:31] In many ways is about maintaining the status quo.
[02:32] Status quo. Management is usually tied to an.
[02:35] Management is usually tied to an official position.
[02:36] Official position. Leading in a nutshell is your ability to.
[02:39] Leading in a nutshell is your ability to successfully guide a group of people.
[02:41] Successfully guide a group of people from point A to point B, and you don't.
[02:44] From point A to point B, and you don't need.
[02:45] Need an official leadership position to.
[02:47] An official leadership position to demonstrate that.
[02:48] Demonstrate that. I was once working with a client and I.
[02:51] I was once working with a client and I came back a year later.
[02:52] Came back a year later to the same organization, and the guy I.
[02:55] To the same organization, and the guy I had been working with had been promoted.
[02:57] Had been working with had been promoted from individual contributor to.
[02:59] From individual contributor to team leader. He had the same hard skills.
[03:02] team leader he had the same hard skills roughly as everybody else.
[03:04] roughly as everybody else but he showed leadership skills long.
[03:06] but he showed leadership skills long before.
[03:08] before they ever promoted him to the actual.
[03:09] they ever promoted him to the actual leadership position.
[03:11] leadership position so some specific leadership skills he.
[03:13] so some specific leadership skills he was good at.
[03:14] was good at were communicating inspiring goals and a.
[03:16] were communicating inspiring goals and a vision.
[03:17] vision he's also a pretty good coach teacher.
[03:20] he's also a pretty good coach teacher mentor.
[03:21] mentor and motivator to the team leadership.
[03:23] and motivator to the team leadership also means.
[03:24] also means keeping the effort on track by.
[03:26] keeping the effort on track by facilitating.
[03:27] facilitating building consensus and engaging.
[03:30] building consensus and engaging everybody along the way.
[03:31] everybody along the way you can do all those things even if you.
[03:34] you can do all those things even if you don't have the word.
[03:35] don't have the word supervisor in your job title number two.
[03:38] supervisor in your job title number two is communication and.
[03:39] is communication and like leadership this word means a lot of.
[03:41] like leadership this word means a lot of different things so i'll narrow it down.
[03:43] different things so i'll narrow it down to.
[03:44] to being skilled at both verbal and.
[03:46] being skilled at both verbal and nonverbal.
[03:47] nonverbal communication verbal communication often.
[03:49] communication verbal communication often means your ability to communicate.
[03:52] means your ability to communicate clearly and concisely this usually means.
[03:55] clearly and concisely this usually means giving.
[03:55] giving clear updates at group and team meetings.
[03:58] clear updates at group and team meetings it means being good at writing emails.
[04:01] it means being good at writing emails and reports so they are easy to follow.
[04:03] and reports so they are easy to follow and well organized nonverbal.
[04:05] and well organized nonverbal communication often means the vibe that you give off.
[04:07] communication often means the vibe that you give off you are communicating.
[04:10] vibe that you give off you are communicating maybe supportive positive and other kinds of good nonverbal cues like eye contact.
[04:13] maybe supportive positive and other kinds of good nonverbal cues like eye contact.
[04:16] kinds of good nonverbal cues like eye contact.
[04:17] contact facial expressions body language i know a guy used to work with who gave off horrible nonverbals.
[04:19] facial expressions body language i know a guy used to work with who gave off horrible nonverbals.
[04:21] a guy used to work with who gave off horrible nonverbals he used to roll his eyes and make faces when he disagreed and shake his head.
[04:24] horrible nonverbals he used to roll his eyes and make faces when he disagreed and shake his head.
[04:27] eyes and make faces when he disagreed and shake his head his boss finally had to talk to him about it because it was dragging everybody else down and really was holding him back from his own advancement without ever saying a word.
[04:28] and shake his head his boss finally had to talk to him about it because it was dragging everybody else down and really was holding him back from his own advancement without ever saying a word.
[04:30] his boss finally had to talk to him about it because it was dragging everybody else down and really was holding him back from his own advancement without ever saying a word.
[04:32] about it because it was dragging everybody else down and really was holding him back from his own advancement without ever saying a word.
[04:34] dragging everybody else down and really was holding him back from his own advancement without ever saying a word.
[04:35] was holding him back from his own advancement without ever saying a word.
[04:38] from his own advancement without ever saying a word.
[04:39] saying a word you can create a negative or positive impression just based upon your nonverbal cues at more advanced levels.
[04:42] you can create a negative or positive impression just based upon your nonverbal cues at more advanced levels.
[04:43] impression just based upon your nonverbal cues at more advanced levels.
[04:45] just based upon your nonverbal cues at more advanced levels.
[04:46] more advanced levels communication skills would also include good public speaking and presentation skills.
[04:49] levels communication skills would also include good public speaking and presentation skills.
[04:49] include good public speaking and presentation skills.
[04:52] good public speaking and presentation skills.
[04:52] skills stand up speaking is a great way to accelerate your career.
[04:56] stand up speaking is a great way to accelerate your career.
[04:58] to accelerate your career good storytelling skills are also important and can help you make a point in a way that really sticks.
[05:00] storytelling skills are also important and can help you make a point in a way that really sticks.
[05:00] and can help you make a point in a way that really sticks.
[05:02] can help you make a point in a way that really sticks.
[05:03] really sticks and your persuasive communication skills.
[05:06] and your persuasive communication skills will help you.
[05:06] will help you build a case when you're asking for.
[05:10] build a case when you're asking for project approval funding or getting.
[05:13] project approval funding or getting people enlisted into an initiative that.
[05:15] people enlisted into an initiative that you care about.
[05:16] you care about number three are your interpersonal.
[05:18] number three are your interpersonal skills and on some lists this.
[05:20] skills and on some lists this is simply called people skills but.
[05:22] is simply called people skills but generally speaking.
[05:24] generally speaking interpersonal skills include things like.
[05:26] interpersonal skills include things like listening well.
[05:27] listening well to others we get a lot of credit for.
[05:30] to others we get a lot of credit for paying attention.
[05:32] paying attention when other people are talking and.
[05:34] when other people are talking and signaling to them that we're following.
[05:35] signaling to them that we're following along.
[05:36] along we also want to communicate a positive.
[05:38] we also want to communicate a positive attitude we want to be friendly.
[05:40] attitude we want to be friendly courteous to others and i'm thinking of.
[05:43] courteous to others and i'm thinking of a guy i used to work with who had.
[05:45] a guy i used to work with who had an excellent ability to build rapport.
[05:48] an excellent ability to build rapport with others to.
[05:49] with others to show empathy he used light humor when it.
[05:52] show empathy he used light humor when it was appropriate.
[05:53] was appropriate and this made it much easier and.
[05:55] and this made it much easier and enjoyable.
[05:56] enjoyable for him to bond with others and to get.
[05:58] for him to bond with others and to get the work done.
[05:59] the work done interpersonal skills also count our.
[06:02] interpersonal skills also count our ability to communicate.
[06:03] ability to communicate assertively and say what we mean but do.
[06:06] assertively and say what we mean but do it in a way that does not come across as aggressive or hostile.
[06:10] and you have to learn to be diplomatic especially when you disagree and that also may include giving criticism in supportive ways and accepting criticism with composure and maturity.
[06:23] number four is work ethic.
[06:25] self-motivation we want to demonstrate that we have a strong work ethic an internal drive a dependability other people should know for example that they can count on us.
[06:37] that means taking self-responsibility for our work taking initiative and showing good self-direction.
[06:42] when i receive calls from employers for references most employers will ask me about an applicant's ability to meet deadlines.
[06:50] their attendance time management these are the basics and i think what they're really asking about is the work ethic and self-motivation.
[07:00] employers don't want to hire people they have to micromanage and wonder if they're going to be working hard.
[07:05] number five is teamwork.
[07:07] working hard number five is teamwork and again this is another big word that
[07:11] can certainly include many of the skills we've already mentioned but specifically teamwork
[07:16] often means our ability to collaborate work cooperatively with others on joint projects
[07:23] part of teamwork is knowing how to connect and put your heads together with other people on your actual team and also work with people in other departments in larger organizations
[07:34] i'm thinking of a boss a former supervisor i used to work for who had very high marks on teamwork
[07:41] she was able to work with a diverse group of stakeholders who often did not share her area of expertise she took a good collectivistic view of the team the team outcomes and the entire effort
[07:54] she came up out of her silo you might call it her own little area of expertise and jargon and she learned how to talk to everybody
[08:01] we probably all know people who do the opposite they are too individualistic and only concerned about their own tasks
[08:08] their own tasks and their own individual projects but if
[08:11] and their own individual projects but if you want high
[08:12] you want high marks for soft skills and working with
[08:15] marks for soft skills and working with other people on a team is really
[08:16] other people on a team is really critical
[08:17] critical number six is problem solving i was
[08:20] number six is problem solving i was talking to a friend of mine the other
[08:21] talking to a friend of mine the other day
[08:22] day he works behind the scenes in television
[08:24] he works behind the scenes in television and he said that his job
[08:26] and he said that his job is essentially solving one problem after
[08:29] is essentially solving one problem after the next
[08:29] the next all day long they start with a plan but
[08:32] all day long they start with a plan but there's never enough
[08:33] there's never enough money or help and there's always
[08:35] money or help and there's always obstacles they didn't see coming
[08:37] obstacles they didn't see coming and our ability to find a way to move
[08:40] and our ability to find a way to move forward and solve those problems is
[08:42] forward and solve those problems is really important
[08:43] really important problem solving usually involves
[08:45] problem solving usually involves critical thinking
[08:46] critical thinking logical reasoning and we have to have
[08:49] logical reasoning and we have to have the ability to think through an issue
[08:51] the ability to think through an issue clearly and reasonably problem solving
[08:54] clearly and reasonably problem solving also involves making good decisions
[08:56] also involves making good decisions informed decisions we can't just do
[09:00] informed decisions we can't just do what we feel like doing we have to come
[09:02] what we feel like doing we have to come up with a solution that
[09:03] up with a solution that actually is going to work not just the
[09:06] actually is going to work not just the first idea that comes to mind
[09:08] first idea that comes to mind or just go with our favorite way of
[09:10] or just go with our favorite way of doing things.
[09:11] doing things and that takes preparation and a systematic approach.
[09:14] and that takes preparation and a systematic approach research creativity and a good dose of personal resourcefulness.
[09:15] research creativity and a good dose of personal resourcefulness number seven is flexibility.
[09:18] personal resourcefulness number seven is flexibility and adaptability.
[09:21] flexibility and adaptability most of us work on a variety of tasks with all sorts of different people.
[09:22] and adaptability most of us work on a variety of tasks with all sorts of different people.
[09:25] work on a variety of tasks with all sorts of different people and that means we have to be flexible and open to change.
[09:27] sorts of different people and that means we have to be flexible and open to change.
[09:29] and that means we have to be flexible and open to change and find new ways of doing things.
[09:31] and open to change and find new ways of doing things oftentimes.
[09:33] and find new ways of doing things oftentimes and this is really hard for some people.
[09:35] oftentimes and this is really hard for some people.
[09:37] and this is really hard for some people i worked with a client for a while who was very inflexible and once she got an idea in her head she would protect it.
[09:39] i worked with a client for a while who was very inflexible and once she got an idea in her head she would protect it.
[09:40] for a while who was very inflexible and once she got an idea in her head she would protect it and she would shoot down any other suggestions.
[09:43] once she got an idea in her head she would protect it and she would shoot down any other suggestions.
[09:44] idea in her head she would protect it and she would shoot down any other suggestions well that's not a good example of soft skills.
[09:46] and she would shoot down any other suggestions well that's not a good example of soft skills.
[09:48] any other suggestions well that's not a good example of soft skills we need to have the self-awareness to realize that we have our own personality quirks.
[09:51] well that's not a good example of soft skills we need to have the self-awareness to realize that we have our own personality quirks.
[09:53] soft skills we need to have the self-awareness to realize that we have our own personality quirks.
[09:54] the self-awareness to realize that we have our own personality quirks our own mental boxes.
[09:57] have our own personality quirks our own mental boxes we have to do our best to put that aside.
[09:59] our own mental boxes we have to do our best to put that aside.
[10:01] we have to do our best to put that aside we have to get better at adapting to others and responding to uncertainty and change with flexibility.
[10:03] best to put that aside we have to get better at adapting to others and responding to uncertainty and change with flexibility.
[10:06] we have to get better at adapting to others and responding to uncertainty and change with flexibility and that means at times to.
[10:07] others and responding to uncertainty and change with flexibility and that means at times to.
[10:09] to uncertainty and change with flexibility and that means at times to.
[10:12] flexibility and that means at times to be open trainable and work well under pressure on deadlines and somehow still get described as someone who is easy to work with.
[10:21] we have to learn how to roll with changes and keep moving forward even when the situation is ambiguous.
[10:28] number eight is our ability to manage and resolve conflict and even negotiate a little bit and this begins of course by being the kind of person who does not create conflict.
[10:40] i honestly believe that when people say they're looking for someone with good conflict management skills that's another way to say we don't want someone who is going to cause conflict who has a tendency to create drama and you can usually tell because this type of person has a win-lose philosophy in order for them to win somebody else must lose so they act competitive in times and in places where it's not necessary at all in my experience people with a win lose or conflict conflict-driven.
[11:13] lose or conflict conflict-driven approach usually brought that with them from their own personal life and they brought it into the workplace.
[11:19] they are like that every place they work in other words and you don't want to be this person so first don't be a source of conflict.
[11:28] and next when conflict comes up between you and others around you learn to deal with it appropriately and productively.
[11:36] that means looking for common ground finding ways to get everybody's interests met and somehow using a disagreement to make things even better in the end.
[11:48] and this might mean drawing on negotiation skills or facilitation skills to hear everybody out make sure everybody feels understood you want to take a win-win approach and look for a satisfactory outcome for everybody involved not just you.
[12:04] it often means being the bigger person the more mature person in other words question of the day.
[12:14] which of these top eight soft skills do you need the most work on personally
[12:16] you need the most work on personally and feel free to check out my free
[12:18] and feel free to check out my free download of the five essential
[12:20] download of the five essential communication skills that every
[12:21] communication skills that every professional should have
[12:23] professional should have and there's always a free class at my
[12:25] and there's always a free class at my communication
[12:26] communication coach academy links to all of those
[12:28] coach academy links to all of those resources and more
[12:29] resources and more are in the description below so thanks
[12:32] are in the description below so thanks god bless and i will see you next time