# Watch Me Coach a Closer Through the Hardest Objection in Sales (Full Breakdown)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FW1zxvy4kzg

[00:00] You're about to watch me coach a closer.
[00:01] You're about to watch me coach a closer through the hardest objection in high ticket sales in real time.
[00:03] No slides, no theory, just me breaking down exactly what to say and why you should say it.
[00:08] The objection is, I need to talk to my partner.
[00:10] And we're going to go six reframes deep, okay?
[00:12] So most closers, what they do is they try one angle, it doesn't land, and then they fold the booking and follow up.
[00:16] In this session, I'm going to walk you through all six layers that has helped me close over 90% of the prospects that I talk to.
[00:21] How to actually [music] push it to money first, how to attack responsibility, the emotional argument that works especially well when you're selling to women, and how to reframe words like respect using NLP, and then the moment where you just go for the jugular and see what happens.
[00:27] If you've ever lost a sale to this objection, watching this training will completely rewire how you handle it permanently.
[00:36] So let's go ahead and dive into the training.
[00:39] So, couple things when we're going about partner objections, for example, the very first thing, like step number one, okay?
[00:41] Always push it to something else, okay?
[01:00] Always push it to something else, okay?
[01:01] So you want to push it to something else, whether it be money, whether it be time, whether it be fear, whether it be value.
[01:08] The reason is, if we push it to something else and then we handle it, then that objection just goes away.
[01:12] Yeah.
[01:16] So we handle it like, for example, nine times out of 10, why do they need to talk to their partner?
[01:19] Finance.
[01:20] Right, they need to talk to their partner about money.
[01:22] But then, if we solve the money issue, a good chunk of the time the partner objection will go away.
[01:28] Not always, but a good chunk of the time.
[01:30] So that's why always, first things first, are we pushing it to something else first?
[01:35] Yeah.
[01:37] That's what I'm doing.
[01:37] So when I say, "Why invest in yourself?" but why actually, and then does it fit in your budget?
[01:43] And when I talk about money, I go to money.
[01:45] Okay, cool.
[01:45] So there there's more there's new levels, right?
[01:48] So then we go into responsibility.
[01:51] Mhm.
[01:53] Okay.
[01:53] So that is like the basic frame that I have on there.
[01:56] Of like, once we get the the the money and everything set aside, there's nothing else holding them
[02:01] aside, there's nothing else holding them back but partner, right?
[02:03] We always want back but partner, right?
[02:03] We always want partner to be the last thing.
[02:06] Then we go partner to be the last thing.
[02:06] Then we go and we attack responsibility.
[02:08] Like and we attack responsibility.
[02:08] Like ultimately, whose responsibility is it to go out and do this thing?
[02:10] ultimately, whose responsibility is it to go out and do this thing?
[02:12] to go out and do this thing?
[02:14] And then from there, like once we tie them up in a responsibility, you always want to shift to like not not talking to your spouse, but like what conversation do you want to have?
[02:16] them up in a responsibility, you always want to shift to like not not talking to your spouse, but like what conversation do you want to have?
[02:19] want to shift to like not not talking to your spouse, but like what conversation do you want to have?
[02:22] your spouse, but like what conversation do you want to have?
[02:24] do you want to have?
[02:24] Right?
[02:24] Like you go to them with all these problems and a big bill to pay, or you go to them leading them to whatever outcome that they want.
[02:26] to them with all these problems and a big bill to pay, or you go to them leading them to whatever outcome that they want.
[02:28] big bill to pay, or you go to them leading them to whatever outcome that they want.
[02:31] leading them to whatever outcome that they want.
[02:32] they want.
[02:32] Which one would you rather do?
[02:35] do?
[02:35] Why that one?
[02:35] What if you don't?
[02:36] And if they And then from there, I'm always always always, okay?
[02:40] always always always, okay?
[02:40] I'm going to take away um just any type of buyer's remorse or anything along those lines.
[02:45] take away um just any type of buyer's remorse or anything along those lines.
[02:47] remorse or anything along those lines.
[02:47] So I'm going to diffuse it with humor.
[02:50] So I'm going to diffuse it with humor.
[02:51] Okay?
[02:52] Yeah.
[02:54] And just basically say like, "Hey, if you go to them and like they're not on board, like we'll give you a refund."
[02:55] you go to them and like they're not on board, like we'll give you a refund.
[02:57] board, like we'll give you a refund.
[03:00] Right?
[03:00] So it's a really easy way to get a bit of buyer's remorse back.
[03:00] So it's,
[03:02] a bit of buyer's remorse back.
[03:05] So it's, "Hey, ultimately whose responsibility is it?"
[03:07] Okay? So is it fair, given it's your responsibility, to go to them and have them make this decision?
[03:13] No, obviously.
[03:15] Why not? Then from there, it's, "Okay, so I'm not saying don't have the conversation.
[03:19] We just have to talk about which conversation are you going to have?
[03:23] Either go to them with a problem and a big bill to pay, or you go to them showing them how you solved the your problem and you lead them to that decision?
[03:31] Which conversation would you rather have?
[03:32] "Oh, I'd rather lead to that decision."
[03:35] "Okay, why though?"
[03:37] And again, if you go to them and you and then they like they they tell you like, "Hey, no, you're going to make way too much money, buy a Porsche, leave me for a 21-year-old."
[03:43] Like if she tells you that, man, like dude, we'll refund you your money.
[03:47] Money's not the important thing right now.
[03:48] The only important thing is just your commitment to change.
[03:50] Are you committed to change?
[03:52] Yes.
[03:54] Okay, so the next steps is this.
[03:56] So that is the first loop.
[03:58] Do you feel like we're generally speaking getting through the first loop pretty good?
[04:00] Yeah, I'm I'm getting up, yeah.
[04:03] Yeah, I'm I'm getting up, yeah.
[04:03] Just Okay.
[04:03] Okay.
[04:03] They they just buy it.
[04:03] Yeah.
[04:03] Okay,
[04:05] They they just buy it.
[04:05] Yeah.
[04:05] Okay, perfect.
[04:08] So this is perfect.
[04:11] So this is I would say this works 50 plus percent of the time, but you're
[04:13] 50 plus percent of the time, but you're going to have people who are more
[04:14] going to have people who are more entrenched in the partner objection.
[04:16] entrenched in the partner objection.
[04:16] Now, pre-handling it is just getting more pain and getting more leverage.
[04:18] Now, pre-handling it is just getting more pain and getting more leverage.
[04:20] Bringing up partner, especially in the discovery, I've noticed just it induces more partner objections than it handles.
[04:23] Bringing up partner, especially in the discovery, I've noticed just it induces more partner objections than it handles.
[04:26] So not really worth it, in my opinion.
[04:29] So not really worth it, in my opinion.
[04:33] Mhm.
[04:33] So what's number three?
[04:36] Now, I have two other tactics that I'll go.
[04:39] Part of it is just going to depend on the rapport you have and how straightforward you want to be.
[04:42] rapport you have and how straightforward you want to be.
[04:44] Okay?
[04:44] Now, when it comes to women, I'm I tend to go the more emotional route first.
[04:46] to women, I'm I tend to go the more emotional route first.
[04:49] Okay?
[04:49] So I'm tugging at the like the emotional strings.
[04:52] So I'm tugging at the like the emotional strings.
[04:54] So I'm going to go the emotional route.
[04:55] So I'm going to go the emotional route.
[04:55] So what is that frame?
[04:58] Now, I I loop through for whatever reason they're not buying through, they're not buying in.
[05:00] Now, I I loop through for whatever reason they're not buying through, they're not buying in.
[05:01] All your This is
[05:03] they're not buying in.
[05:03] All your This is all you're thinking about, okay?
[05:05] I use one tactic and I probably got some hooks in, but they're not enough hooks in to get this person across the line.
[05:09] I need to take a different angle to overcome this belief.
[05:16] Like we had mentioned before, all it is the a belief is like a table, we're taking out the legs.
[05:22] And the best guess, generally speaking, is responsibility.
[05:26] The next best guess, especially for women, is going to be the more of the emotional argument.
[05:29] Okay, [snorts] so it goes something a little bit like this.
[05:30] It's like, "Hey, I I appreciate you really want to talk to your partner, right?
[05:32] Like it makes sense.
[05:36] I do have to ask, and this is more just like on a hypothetical level, if you were looking to achieve, you know, like your dreams, and you I know you really want this.
[05:46] If anybody, not not even your partner, if anybody were to stop you from achieving your dreams, how would you feel about that person?
[05:56] So you need to get them to answer the [ __ ] question.
[06:01] Because like and what what can happen?
[06:03] 50/50, they'll push back on it.
[06:05] 50/50, they'll push back on it.
[06:05] It's like, "Oh, no, they're not doing that."
[06:06] like, "Oh, no, they're not doing that."
[06:06] I'm like, "I don't know."
[06:07] I'm like, "I don't know."
[06:07] That's why I'm always like I always preframe it like,
[06:08] always like I always preframe it like, "Hypothetically, it doesn't have to be your partner, just if anyone did."
[06:12] your partner, just if anyone did."
[06:12] So if they push back, I'm like, "Oh, no,
[06:14] and I'm not saying they will.
[06:14] I'm just saying hypothetically,
[06:17] if somebody did do this, how would you feel about them?
[06:20] feel about them?
[06:20] Why would you feel that way about them?
[06:24] Why would you feel that way about them?"
[06:24] "Oh, cuz of this this and this."
[06:27] "So can I be super straightforward with you without you getting upset at me?
[06:28] If you truly care about this and you truly care about your partner, why would you even put them in a position that you could feel that way about them?
[06:32] about your partner, why would you even put them in a position that you could feel that way about them?
[06:40] feel that way about them?
[06:40] Why would you do that?
[06:43] Why would you do that?
[06:43] And God forbid, if you had to feel that way about them, what do you what type of relationship what like what do you feel like that would cause in the relationship?
[06:44] And God forbid, if you had to feel that way about them, what do you what type of relationship what like what do you feel like that would cause in the relationship?
[06:49] like that would cause in the relationship?
[06:49] Do you even want that possibility to even happen?
[06:52] possibility to even happen?
[06:52] Okay, so what do we need to do to make sure we're doing everything in our power, well, given that it's our responsibility, and we don't even put our partner in the position that we could feel this way towards them?
[06:54] Okay, so what do we need to do to make sure we're doing everything in our power, well, given that it's our responsibility, and we don't even put our partner in the position that we could feel this way towards them?
[06:57] sure we're doing everything in our power, well, given that it's our responsibility, and we don't even put our partner in the position that we could feel this way towards them?
[07:01] responsibility, and we don't even put our partner in the position that we could feel this way towards them?
[07:03] our partner in the position that we could feel this way towards them?
[07:06] way towards them?
[07:08] You see how it builds?
[07:08] I need like the responsibility is a good one cuz it's like it's very logically coherent, but I need the emotional stuff to build on top of it.
[07:13] So that's why, generally speaking, I won't go the emotional route first.
[07:19] Like sometimes I might, but most of the time I'm going to do it after I tie off responsibility.
[07:27] Okay.
[07:27] Yeah.
[07:30] Does that make sense?
[07:30] That makes sense.
[07:30] Yeah.
[07:32] Okay, cool.
[07:32] Now, when you have like you can go this route with men as well, okay?
[07:38] But uh I will I'll usually I'll usually have this one be the last thing I do for guys.
[07:48] Okay?
[07:49] The the one I generally speaking, like after I go responsibility, is I'll talk about trust.
[07:56] Now, this one in general does not work as well on just women, just because relationship dynamics are going to be a bit different.
[08:07] bit different.
[08:07] Yeah.
[08:07] Yeah.
[08:10] So what we're really attacking, we're like with with 3A, we're attacking the emotional argument.
[08:12] Why would you Why would you even put them in a position for you to feel this way about them?
[08:17] With 3B, we're really attacking the idea of why does your partner not trust you to make these decisions by yourself?
[08:28] Okay?
[08:28] And the reason, if they're honest, and And this is a very very straightforward, okay?
[08:32] So this is why I'm not going to uh go to this right away, cuz it's very straightforward.
[08:39] And it cuts to the heart of the issue.
[08:44] But if you need to get somebody across the line and it's a partner objection, you need to cut to the heart of the issue.
[08:50] So we talk about trust.
[08:50] So if they're like, "Oh, no, I just I need to talk to her I need to talk to her."
[08:54] It's like, "Yeah, dude, I I get where you're coming from.
[09:00] Why do you feel like for you that your wife doesn't trust you to make these decisions by yourself and trust your judgment?"
[09:08] That's like, "Oh, no, she does trust me."
[09:11] Well, hey man, like if she if she really did trust you, you wouldn't have an issue like actually making these decisions without her.
[09:17] And I can I can appreciate that right now you don't feel like you can.
[09:21] So why do you feel like there's not that trust there?
[09:25] Okay.
[09:26] Okay.
[09:26] Yeah, that's all.
[09:27] So I'm cutting to the heart of the issue.
[09:31] Why is this trust not there?
[09:33] Then I'm going to go like that's that's just bridging into it.
[09:35] Then I'm going to go even a step deeper.
[09:38] It's like, "Hey man, can I just be super straightforward without you getting upset at me?"
[09:43] Now, you you don't always have to use that phrase, but that's a real easy phrase to start to talk directly at somebody without them getting Okay?
[09:50] So I'm always going to be like, "Hey man, can I can I be super straightforward with you without you getting upset at me?"
[09:58] They're like, yes.
[10:00] Hey, if I was your wife, I wouldn't trust you either.
[10:05] But it's because how you've shown up to this point.
[10:08] How are we ever going to show her we can
[10:10] How are we ever going to show her we can be trusted if we never do the actions?
[10:13] be trusted if we never do the actions and we never start making the money we truly need to make to make sure her mind's at ease and she can actually trust that we can make these decisions.
[10:17] truly need to make to make sure her mind's at ease and she can actually trust that we can make these decisions.
[10:22] trust that we can make these decisions.
[10:23] How are we ever going to do that if we don't show her?
[10:25] don't show her?
[10:26] What if you never show her?
[10:28] What if she never trusts you on the level that you need to for the rest of your life?
[10:31] need to for the rest of your life?
[10:33] Yeah.
[10:35] Are you going to allow that to happen?
[10:37] So, what do we need to do to show her you can be trusted?
[10:40] Okay?
[10:42] So, that is the blanket framework.
[10:45] Now, other things that I can do to bridge into this, I will and and and and since you
[10:49] And and maybe just because like you are in a different country, maybe you you need to use a different example, but I'll use like uh Warren Buffett as an example.
[10:51] in a different country, maybe you you need to use a different example, but I'll use like uh Warren Buffett as an example.
[10:57] So, I'm like, hey man, so this can be something to bridge into the to bridge into the frame.
[10:59] example.
[11:02] So, I'm like, hey man, uh can can I make a suggestion, dude?
[11:04] the to bridge into the frame.
[11:06] I'll just like, hey man, uh can can I make a suggestion, dude?
[11:08] So, do you feel like Warren Buffett has
[11:10] So, do you feel like Warren Buffett has to go and talk to his wife to go and talk to his wife about the investments he makes even about the investments he makes even though they're worth billions of though they're worth billions of dollars?
[11:18] Like, no, right?
[11:18] Because like he he Yeah, cuz he's got that, right?
[11:21] Like he she trusts him.
[11:23] So, why do you feel like your wife doesn't really trust you or you don't feel comfortable enough with that level of trust to make this decision without her the way like someone somebody like Warren Buffett would?
[11:33] So, that it's a it's a easy way using an example to bridge into it or using an example if we get pushback allows you to go ahead and um just make it make a little bit more sense.
[11:47] Okay?
[11:47] So, any questions on this in terms of attacking the partner objection?
[11:54] No questions.
[11:54] This is really Do you do you have a typed out somewhere so I can just study it or do you Yeah, I have it uh yeah, I have it typed out.
[12:02] If you go into the the school, I have it under like the partner.
[12:06] Okay, great.
[12:06] All the frames the the free frames?
[12:08] I'm pretty sure.
[12:08] They should be there.
[12:12] I'm pretty sure.
[12:12] They should be there.
[12:13] If they're not, just tell me and I'll I'll I'll find I have them somewhere.
[12:15] I'll I'll find I have them somewhere.
[12:17] Um Okay, so those those are like generally speaking the the way I'll go about it
[12:21] and for example, if I have a guy and just like very rarely do they ever break out of this trust thing, but if I can't get them on the trust thing, then I'll go the emotional route.
[12:33] For women, generally speaking, the trust thing it doesn't make as much sense.
[12:38] Okay, just because of how relationship dynamics are, so I normally don't really I don't I don't really use that on women.
[12:45] It's just um you know, push it to something else responsibility and emotional.
[12:49] And then from there, if all else fails, okay, after we made like logically coherent arguments, there's really nothing for them to actually say or do to get out of it.
[13:00] We just go straight to fear.
[13:02] So, four is just like we we just go straight to fear and uncertainty.
[13:07] Okay?
[13:09] And that's all we're handling at that point.
[13:11] I'm like, hey bro, we both know you should do this.
[13:11] What's really
[13:12] you should do this.
[13:12] What's really holding you back?
[13:13] And we're just pushing holding you back?
[13:13] And we're just pushing it to fear and we just, you know, do uh you know, the different fear re-frames,
[13:17] you know, the different fear re-frames, continue to raise the intensity and then we're just going for the sale.
[13:20] we're just going for the sale.
[13:24] Yeah.
[13:24] Okay.
[13:26] And after that, we're just going to we're lost.
[13:28] we're lost.
[13:29] No.
[13:31] Well, it's like after that, right?
[13:31] Like if I if generally speaking, this is what I'll do on like fear re-frames,
[13:33] what I'll do on like fear re-frames, right?
[13:35] So, I have I'll do three to four fear re-frames.
[13:38] Okay?
[13:43] And then from like each time the intensity is raising.
[13:45] And then from like each time the intensity is raising.
[13:47] intensity is raising.
[13:49] Okay?
[13:51] Like I'm raising the intensity like just more like just daddy's home energy.
[13:53] energy.
[13:55] Yeah.
[13:56] Okay, so like by the end like I'm bullying these people into it.
[13:57] bullying these people into it.
[14:00] But it's like it always needs to come from the place of like uh they're they're your younger brother.
[14:02] from the place of like uh they're they're your younger brother.
[14:05] they're your younger brother.
[14:07] Yeah.
[14:07] >> siblings?
[14:09] I have a big sister. No no brothers.
[14:12] >> Okay.
[14:12] Do you have like little cousins or
[14:13] Okay. Do you have like little cousins or something like that?
[14:15] Yeah, but my relationship isn't the best with them.
[14:18] So yeah, no worries.
[14:19] The way you got to think about it is yeah, no no.
[14:21] The way you got to think about it is yeah, no no no.
[14:22] The way you got to think about it is like if you truly cared about somebody,
[14:24] like if you truly cared about somebody, but it's like you don't accept their
[14:26] but it's like you don't accept their
[14:28] Yeah, I have a friend.
[14:30] I know him for like 16 years.
[14:32] So, I I bully him sometimes cuz he's still
[14:33] sometimes cuz he's still
[14:35] And I'm pretty sure you can say some pretty
[14:37] pretty straight-forward and rocky
[14:39] rocky and get away with it cuz he knows you care about him.
[14:41] knows you care about him.
[14:44] Yeah, yeah.
[14:44] Like I that's that's the understand like that's the frame we take
[14:46] out.
[14:46] It's yes, we increase the intensity.
[14:48] Yes, we're a lot more straight-forward, but it's always for
[14:49] straight-forward, but it's always for their best intention at heart.
[14:51] their best intention at heart.
[14:54] Okay?
[14:54] That's how it comes across.
[14:56] That's how we can say pretty rocky
[14:58] rocky without having the stink on it.
[15:01] it.
[15:02] Like honestly, I don't care whether the person buys, whether they don't buy, I'm
[15:03] person buys, whether they don't buy, I'm just going to hold up a mirror and tell
[15:06] just going to hold up a mirror and tell them what needs to be said.
[15:08] And because I don't care whether they buy or don't
[15:11] I don't care whether they buy or don't buy, they don't there's not a stink like
[15:13] buy, they don't there's not a stink like
[15:15] buy, they don't there's not a stink like I need something from from them.
[15:16] Like I need something from from them.
[15:16] Like I don't care.
[15:18] don't care.
[15:18] Yeah.
[15:20] Like I care about them.
[15:20] I don't care about the sale.
[15:22] care about the sale.
[15:24] So, that's how you can say like pretty straight-forward stuff without the stink.
[15:27] So, you you just want to make sure like you don't have the stink.
[15:30] After the three to four fear re-frames and and to be fair, you can do this, you know, [ __ ] for like three plus hours.
[15:33] After the three to four fear re-frames and and to be fair, you can do this, you know, [ __ ] for like three plus hours.
[15:37] Okay?
[15:39] If you want to do.
[15:42] Like I'm not.
[15:44] Well, you just keep looping.
[15:45] You just keep going.
[15:47] But what do you mean?
[15:49] Just the same re-frames again and again or Yeah, no, you use different re-frames.
[15:51] Right?
[15:53] It's cuz like each re-frame if you really are doing what you should be doing, you're tying it down, you're getting pushback, you're getting the buy-in, like each of them will probably at least take 10 minutes.
[15:55] Right?
[15:57] You're going through everything.
[15:59] So, you can just w-
[16:01] Once you get to a certain point, you stop like using like, you know, perfect
[16:02] Once you get to a certain point, you stop like using like, you know, perfect
[16:04] Once you get to a certain point, you stop like using like, you know, perfect
[16:07] Once you get to a certain point, you stop like using like, you know, perfect
[16:11] Once you get to a certain point, you stop like using like, you know, perfect
[16:12] Once you get to a certain point, you stop like using like, you know, perfect
[16:13] Once you get to a certain point, you stop like using like, you know, perfect
[16:15] stop like using like, you know, perfect re-frames and you just start talking.
[16:17] re-frames and you just start talking very directly at them and still making.
[16:19] very directly at them and still making the same thing where you're still using.
[16:21] the same thing where you're still using the re-frames and you're still using the.
[16:23] the re-frames and you're still using the same type of structure where it's uh you.
[16:26] same type of structure where it's uh you know, like the the re-frame.
[16:29] know, like the the re-frame binary.
[16:31] binary Okay, then you.
[16:34] Okay, then you What?
[16:35] What? No, I.
[16:37] No, I This is what happened like a week ago.
[16:39] This is what happened like a week ago. Yeah, so I just want to say it.
[16:41] Yeah, so I just want to say it. I did all the frames and then I did the.
[16:43] I did all the frames and then I did the the the last frame so I can be really.
[16:45] the the last frame so I can be really straight-forward to him and I said,
[16:47] "Okay, can I be honest with you without being upset with me?"
[16:49] being upset with me?" Yeah, of course.
[16:51] And then and then he said I said, "Okay, when you go off this call, 10% of the.
[16:54] Okay, when you go off this call, 10% of the people that actually talk to their.
[16:56] people that actually talk to their partner come back and buy and you're not.
[16:57] partner come back and buy and you're not one of them. You're going to you're.
[16:59] one of them. You're going to you're going to be a loser [laughter] in your.
[17:01] going to be a loser [laughter] in your time."
[17:02] If if you're going off this call, you're.
[17:04] If if you're going off this call, you're never going to do [ __ ] and you're just.
[17:06] never going to do [ __ ] and you're just going to stay in this loop and not going.
[17:07] going to stay in this loop and not going to lie, you're going to be a loser. And.
[17:09] to lie, you're going to be a loser. And then he said,
[17:11] then he said, "Yeah, okay, that's true."
[17:13] "Yeah, okay, that's true." And then he bought.
[17:14] And then he bought.
[17:16] bought.
[17:16] Something.
[17:17] Something.
[17:17] I don't know.
[17:17] Yeah, and it's like when I don't know.
[17:19] Yeah, and it's like when you have that level of rapport,
[17:21] you have that level of rapport, you can get away with like that.
[17:23] you can get away with like that.
[17:23] And that level of straight-forwardness, some people need that.
[17:25] And that level of straight-forwardness, some people need that.
[17:27] So, that's why I won't I won't sit here for 3 hours.
[17:29] So, that's why I won't I won't sit here for 3 hours.
[17:31] I'll do three to four re-frames and then again, if you need to, a lot of the re-frames I'll use are like, yeah, the re-frames I have back there, but a lot of them I'll come up with like on the go or like just something I I've thought through before and it's just using the same type of framework.
[17:33] I'll do three to four re-frames and then again, if you need to, a lot of the re-frames I'll use are like, yeah, the re-frames I have back there, but a lot of them I'll come up with like on the go or like just something I I've thought through before and it's just using the same type of framework.
[17:36] again, if you need to, a lot of the re-frames I'll use are like, yeah, the re-frames I have back there, but a lot of them I'll come up with like on the go or like just something I I've thought through before and it's just using the same type of framework.
[17:38] re-frames I'll use are like, yeah, the re-frames I have back there, but a lot of them I'll come up with like on the go or like just something I I've thought through before and it's just using the same type of framework.
[17:40] re-frames I have back there, but a lot of them I'll come up with like on the go or like just something I I've thought through before and it's just using the same type of framework.
[17:42] of them I'll come up with like on the go or like just something I I've thought through before and it's just using the same type of framework.
[17:44] or like just something I I've thought through before and it's just using the same type of framework.
[17:46] through before and it's just using the same type of framework.
[17:46] It's a re-frame binary option, why that one, consequence sale.
[17:48] same type of framework.
[17:48] It's a re-frame binary option, why that one, consequence sale.
[17:51] binary option, why that one, consequence sale.
[17:51] Okay?
[17:51] Just like the framework that I have back there.
[17:53] sale. Okay? Just like the framework that I have back there.
[17:55] I have back there.
[17:55] So, it's it's the same thing.
[17:55] It It really helps to have like a like you thinking through a lot of these things by yourself in terms of like how you think.
[17:58] same thing.
[17:58] It It really helps to have like a like you thinking through a lot of these things by yourself in terms of like how you think.
[18:00] like a like you thinking through a lot of these things by yourself in terms of like how you think.
[18:02] of these things by yourself in terms of like how you think.
[18:02] Because if you can convey how you think, you'll come across very authoritative and you'll come across very convicted rather than just cuz a lot of the re-frames are how I think, right?
[18:04] like how you think.
[18:04] Because if you can convey how you think, you'll come across very authoritative and you'll come across very convicted rather than just cuz a lot of the re-frames are how I think, right?
[18:06] convey how you think, you'll come across very authoritative and you'll come across very convicted rather than just cuz a lot of the re-frames are how I think, right?
[18:08] very authoritative and you'll come across very convicted rather than just cuz a lot of the re-frames are how I think, right?
[18:11] across very convicted rather than just cuz a lot of the re-frames are how I think, right?
[18:13] cuz a lot of the re-frames are how I think, right?
[18:14] think, right?
[18:14] And it's like they're great to use someone else's re-frames,
[18:16] great to use someone else's re-frames, but ultimately you want to get to the point where they're your re-frames.
[18:19] This is how you think.
[18:20] This is how you view the world.
[18:22] Even though it might be very similar to the way that I view the world, you're going to say it in a different way and it's going to come across in different way and it's going to come across much more authentic to you.
[18:30] So, that's what we do there.
[18:33] After three to four re-frames, then I'll just go the the nice versus kind.
[18:41] Okay?
[18:44] So, you can use a ton of different examples of what this is.
[18:47] It's just like I go through, I realize I'm not getting anywhere.
[18:49] I'm like, hey man, can I can I share you a quick thing?
[18:52] It's uh it kind of reminds me of like the difference between being nice and being kind.
[18:56] If we're out of the bar and we're talking to some girls and if my breath stank,
[19:01] if you're nice, you wouldn't say anything to me because you'd be worried about what I would think and you'd be worried about any type of repercussions.
[19:11] Another on other end, if you're a really good friend and you were kind to me, you'd pull me to the side and you'd say,
[19:16] you'd pull me to the side and you'd say, "Hey bro, your breath stinks.
[19:17] Hey bro, your breath stinks.
[19:17] Here's some gum.
[19:19] Let's get back in there.
[19:19] Let's talk to the honeys.
[19:20] talk to the honeys.
[19:21] Right?
[19:21] Do you mind if I'm a little bit kind right now?
[19:25] right now?
[19:25] So, you you show them the difference being nice versus being kind because the stuff that you said to him like, hey bro, you're going to be a loser for the rest of your [ __ ] life if you don't do anything about this, that's when you just you go for the jugular.
[19:26] So, you you show them the difference being nice versus being kind because the stuff that you said to him like, hey
[19:29] stuff that you said to him like, hey bro, you're going to be a loser for the rest of your [ __ ] life if you don't do anything about this, that's when you
[19:30] bro, you're going to be a loser for the rest of your [ __ ] life if you don't
[19:31] rest of your [ __ ] life if you don't do anything about this, that's when you
[19:32] do anything about this, that's when you just you go for the jugular.
[19:34] just you go for the jugular.
[19:37] You just you just go for it.
[19:39] you just go for it.
[19:39] Yeah.
[19:43] Okay?
[19:43] Whatever it is that you have that is like you know it you're like you're talking directly at him, like you just you just go for it.
[19:45] that is like you know it you're like you're talking directly at him, like you
[19:47] you're talking directly at him, like you just you just go for it.
[19:50] just you just go for it.
[19:50] And like it's buy or die situation.
[19:53] And like it's buy or die situation.
[19:53] Especially in a B2C environment, those guys aren't coming back.
[19:56] Especially in a B2C environment, those guys aren't coming back.
[19:58] guys aren't coming back.
[19:58] You know they're not coming back.
[20:00] they're not coming back.
[20:00] They're not coming back.
[20:00] So, it's buyer die, nice versus kind.
[20:02] coming back. So, it's buyer die, nice versus kind.
[20:02] It's a really easy way to then transition into hey, I've done my three to five, whatever fear re-frames.
[20:04] versus kind. It's a really easy way to then transition into hey,
[20:06] then transition into hey, I've done my three to five, whatever fear re-frames.
[20:08] I've done my three to five, whatever fear re-frames.
[20:08] I'm not getting anywhere.
[20:10] I'm not getting anywhere.
[20:10] Let's just [ __ ] go for the jugular and see what happens.
[20:12] anywhere. Let's just [ __ ] go for the jugular and see what happens.
[20:15] jugular and see what happens.
[20:15] Right?
[20:15] You'll get a couple people to
[20:17] Right? You'll get a couple people to hang up on you. They'll complain.
[20:18] hang up on you. They'll complain. Doesn't [ __ ] matter. If you're not
[20:20] Doesn't [ __ ] matter. If you're not getting any complaints ever, you're not
[20:22] getting any complaints ever, you're not going hard enough.
[20:24] going hard enough. Yeah.
[20:24] Yeah. >> Right? So, you'll you'll find the line.
[20:27] >> Right? So, you'll you'll find the line. Okay? So, don't be nasty towards people,
[20:29] Okay? So, don't be nasty towards people, but you get to be direct to people if
[20:31] but you get to be direct to people if they need to hear it, if it's in their
[20:32] they need to hear it, if it's in their best interest. So, that is going to be
[20:36] best interest. So, that is going to be the structure there.
[20:38] the structure there. Any any questions on all that?
[20:41] Any any questions on all that? No, the part
[20:42] No, the part the the last one is I I know that one,
[20:44] the the last one is I I know that one, but the partner is really good. So, the
[20:47] but the partner is really good. So, the I didn't I didn't look at partner yet in
[20:49] I didn't I didn't look at partner yet in the school. So, this is great.
[20:52] the school. So, this is great. Great, cuz I was just focusing on on
[20:54] Great, cuz I was just focusing on on fear and money this week. So,
[20:57] fear and money this week. So, it's going to be really nice. This will
[21:00] it's going to be really nice. This will In terms of partner, is there any any
[21:02] In terms of partner, is there any any type of thing like you you run into that
[21:04] type of thing like you you run into that you have like a hard time? Is it just
[21:07] you have like a hard time? Is it just like oh, like when they I get push back,
[21:09] like oh, like when they I get push back, I don't know where to go?
[21:11] I don't know where to go? Sometimes it's just they say, "Yeah, but
[21:14] Sometimes it's just they say, "Yeah, but I I know all of the It's just a
[21:16] I I know all of the It's just a respect." They say respect. And they
[21:19] respect." They say respect. And they just I want to respect my my my partner,
[21:22] just I want to respect my my my partner, but so
[21:24] but so sometimes I don't know where to go from
[21:25] sometimes I don't know where to go from there because it's not trust. They say,
[21:28] there because it's not trust. They say, "Yeah, but they trust me. I can do it.
[21:29] "Yeah, but they trust me. I can do it. And
[21:31] And if I want to, I can do it right now, but
[21:32] if I want to, I can do it right now, but it's just respect." I'm like, "Fuck
[21:35] it's just respect." I'm like, "Fuck you."
[21:36] you." >> [laughter]
[21:37] >> [laughter] >> Yeah, go [ __ ] yourself. Um okay, so
[21:40] >> Yeah, go [ __ ] yourself. Um okay, so we're talking about respect.
[21:43] we're talking about respect. So, um
[21:47] So, respect equals waning and talking.
[21:51] So, respect equals waning and talking. Okay. So, this is their belief. So, this
[21:53] Okay. So, this is their belief. So, this is why like again, the these these
[21:56] is why like again, the these these things are going to be the things that's
[21:57] things are going to be the things that's like most common. But when it's
[21:59] like most common. But when it's something like this, like hey,
[22:01] something like this, like hey, uh respect equals waning and talking to
[22:04] uh respect equals waning and talking to my partner. So, we understand what this
[22:07] my partner. So, we understand what this is. This is the fundamental
[22:09] is. This is the fundamental understanding of what their belief is.
[22:11] understanding of what their belief is. Okay? So, if I hear this on a sales
[22:13] Okay? So, if I hear this on a sales call, what I'm really wanting to do is I
[22:16] call, what I'm really wanting to do is I need to change what the meaning of
[22:19] need to change what the meaning of respect is.
[22:21] respect is. So, I need to change and this is just so
[22:23] So, I need to change and this is just so you can conceptually understand it.
[22:25] you can conceptually understand it. Okay?
[22:28] Okay.
[22:30] Okay. Respect actually equals like going for
[22:32] Respect actually equals like going for it. Okay? So, this is what I need to
[22:36] it. Okay? So, this is what I need to make.
[22:37] make. So, when you go back into the objection
[22:39] So, when you go back into the objection handling, you can do a lot more in terms
[22:42] handling, you can do a lot more in terms of like the study on like changing the
[22:44] of like the study on like changing the meaning or changing the cause to NLP
[22:46] meaning or changing the cause to NLP techniques back there. But this is the
[22:48] techniques back there. But this is the fundamental shift we need to make when
[22:50] fundamental shift we need to make when you hear something like this. So, when
[22:52] you hear something like this. So, when somebody says like hey, I
[22:54] somebody says like hey, I like our frames aren't landing, we just
[22:57] like our frames aren't landing, we just really need to pay close attention to
[22:59] really need to pay close attention to their language because we're probably
[23:02] their language because we're probably saying the right things with the wrong
[23:04] saying the right things with the wrong words.
[23:06] words. And that's an issue because they could,
[23:09] And that's an issue because they could, you know, think something about the
[23:11] you know, think something about the words we're using that's totally
[23:12] words we're using that's totally different than what we mean by them. So,
[23:14] different than what we mean by them. So, that's why we're always like we always
[23:16] that's why we're always like we always want to be really big on using their
[23:19] want to be really big on using their words. So, if they said something like
[23:21] words. So, if they said something like this early on when I'm like handling
[23:23] this early on when I'm like handling partner, I'm going to layer it into
[23:26] partner, I'm going to layer it into these things.
[23:28] these things. Right? I'm going to layer it into these
[23:30] Right? I'm going to layer it into these things in terms of instead of just like
[23:32] things in terms of instead of just like trust, right? Like why does like why do
[23:35] trust, right? Like why does like why do you feel like you don't have the respect
[23:38] you feel like you don't have the respect from them and the trust from them to be
[23:40] from them and the trust from them to be able to just do this by yourself. I'm
[23:41] able to just do this by yourself. I'm going to add in the word respect.
[23:44] going to add in the word respect. Because that's what they're focusing on.
[23:46] Because that's what they're focusing on. Okay? But let's just talk about it by
[23:47] Okay? But let's just talk about it by itself.
[23:49] itself. So, for example, when you said that guy
[23:52] So, for example, when you said that guy is like oh, it's it's not a trust thing,
[23:54] is like oh, it's it's not a trust thing, they trust me, it's more about a respect
[23:56] they trust me, it's more about a respect thing.
[23:57] thing. The way we got to think about it is like
[23:58] The way we got to think about it is like how do I change the meaning? And
[24:00] how do I change the meaning? And generally speaking, how I'm going to
[24:02] generally speaking, how I'm going to change the meaning on how they go about
[24:05] change the meaning on how they go about viewing this and and their belief often
[24:08] viewing this and and their belief often times is going to be connected with what
[24:11] times is going to be connected with what they want.
[24:13] they want. Okay? So, for that person in particular,
[24:16] Okay? So, for that person in particular, what did they want?
[24:18] what did they want? Like what's the outcome? What Why do
[24:20] Like what's the outcome? What Why do they want to change?
[24:21] they want to change? So,
[24:23] So, she was working
[24:25] she was working from Monday to Friday at the location.
[24:28] from Monday to Friday at the location. She did
[24:30] She did customer service.
[24:32] customer service. And she wanted to you to learn
[24:35] And she wanted to you to learn appointment setting so she can make more
[24:37] appointment setting so she can make more money, be location free, and travel the
[24:39] money, be location free, and travel the world, and just not be in that slur of 9
[24:43] world, and just not be in that slur of 9 to 5 every day. And she didn't see
[24:45] to 5 every day. And she didn't see herself doing that for the rest of her
[24:47] herself doing that for the rest of her life. And it was making her upset.
[24:50] life. And it was making her upset. So, it sounds like she she just wants
[24:51] So, it sounds like she she just wants like more freedom.
[24:53] like more freedom. Right? Um
[24:55] Right? Um Married?
[24:58] Married? Uh no, boyfriend for like 5 years.
[25:01] Uh no, boyfriend for like 5 years. Okay. Just like 5 years.
[25:03] Okay. Just like 5 years. Um are they Do you know if like she
[25:06] Um are they Do you know if like she didn't mention anything about family,
[25:07] didn't mention anything about family, did she?
[25:09] did she? No, she didn't.
[25:10] No, she didn't. Okay.
[25:12] Okay. So, then that one's going to be a little
[25:14] So, then that one's going to be a little bit interesting. Actually actually she
[25:16] bit interesting. Actually actually she did. She did she did mention about But
[25:20] did. She did she did mention about But it was the purpose. Her her father was
[25:23] it was the purpose. Her her father was really successful and
[25:25] really successful and he had a lot of
[25:27] he had a lot of uh
[25:27] uh houses. How do you say it? Houses. You
[25:30] houses. How do you say it? Houses. You You sell your houses.
[25:32] You sell your houses. Uh real estate. Thank you.
[25:34] Uh real estate. Thank you. And
[25:35] And she can just get houses from her father,
[25:38] she can just get houses from her father, but she doesn't want to get houses from
[25:40] but she doesn't want to get houses from the father because she wants to earn the
[25:42] the father because she wants to earn the respect of the father that she can do it
[25:44] respect of the father that she can do it on her own. That was one of the things
[25:46] on her own. That was one of the things as well.
[25:48] as well. That
[25:50] That is the key.
[25:51] is the key. Cool.
[25:53] Cool. Okay.
[25:54] Okay. So, we just need to shift, right? Like
[25:57] So, we just need to shift, right? Like So, the first thing I was thinking about
[25:59] So, the first thing I was thinking about if I didn't have any type of leverage,
[26:01] if I didn't have any type of leverage, right? Cuz a lot of the times the people
[26:02] right? Cuz a lot of the times the people you're talking to when they talk about
[26:04] you're talking to when they talk about respect, they talk about family. Often
[26:06] respect, they talk about family. Often times the reason they want to do things
[26:08] times the reason they want to do things is for their family.
[26:10] is for their family. Okay? They want to give their family a
[26:12] Okay? They want to give their family a better life. So, is it actually
[26:14] better life. So, is it actually respectful to your family you not doing
[26:16] respectful to your family you not doing the things you need to do and you not
[26:17] the things you need to do and you not making the money you want to be making?
[26:19] making the money you want to be making? Generally speaking, when I hear respect,
[26:21] Generally speaking, when I hear respect, that's where my mind goes immediately.
[26:22] that's where my mind goes immediately. With this conversation in particular,
[26:24] With this conversation in particular, you didn't have that leverage. You
[26:26] you didn't have that leverage. You didn't have that hook in there cuz it
[26:28] didn't have that hook in there cuz it just what She didn't have it. She didn't
[26:30] just what She didn't have it. She didn't care about it. Yeah. So again, it's
[26:32] care about it. Yeah. So again, it's about having the flexibility. Now, part
[26:34] about having the flexibility. Now, part of it as well, if like let's just say
[26:36] of it as well, if like let's just say for example, there there's two ways that
[26:38] for example, there there's two ways that my mind goes immediately.
[26:40] my mind goes immediately. If I didn't have the father information,
[26:43] If I didn't have the father information, I would shift to
[26:45] I would shift to um
[26:47] um like respect is taking care of yourself.
[26:51] like respect is taking care of yourself. Right? It's like
[26:53] Right? It's like ultimately I I appreciate like you want
[26:55] ultimately I I appreciate like you want to go ahead and respect them, but how
[26:58] to go ahead and respect them, but how does not respecting yourself and not
[27:00] does not respecting yourself and not respecting your dreams on getting to XYZ
[27:03] respecting your dreams on getting to XYZ outcome actually give them the respect?
[27:06] outcome actually give them the respect? How does it do that?
[27:08] How does it do that? I'm going to attack why she needs to put
[27:11] I'm going to attack why she needs to put like again, with women a lot of times
[27:13] like again, with women a lot of times it's the emotional argument, especially
[27:14] it's the emotional argument, especially with partner.
[27:16] with partner. Okay? So, that's where my mind goes
[27:17] Okay? So, that's where my mind goes immediately. But with the father
[27:20] immediately. But with the father information because it sounds like if if
[27:22] information because it sounds like if if respect is a big thing that comes up
[27:24] respect is a big thing that comes up over and over again, let's just use it.
[27:26] over and over again, let's just use it. Like let's just use the fuel that she
[27:28] Like let's just use the fuel that she gave you. So, the the very first thing
[27:30] gave you. So, the the very first thing I'll be like, "Okay. Well, how would
[27:32] I'll be like, "Okay. Well, how would this be any different from the respect
[27:34] this be any different from the respect you're trying to get like from your
[27:35] you're trying to get like from your father? Cuz it seems like you want to be
[27:38] father? Cuz it seems like you want to be able to do things like by yourself and
[27:40] able to do things like by yourself and show the people around you like you're
[27:42] show the people around you like you're capable. So, how are you going to show
[27:45] capable. So, how are you going to show them the respect and get the respect
[27:47] them the respect and get the respect that you truly deserve if you can't make
[27:49] that you truly deserve if you can't make this decision on your own and actually
[27:52] this decision on your own and actually show them that you're worth respect? I
[27:54] show them that you're worth respect? I would loop in the respect from her
[27:55] would loop in the respect from her boyfriend and the respect from her
[27:57] boyfriend and the respect from her father into one thing and it has to be
[28:01] father into one thing and it has to be oh, you have to go ahead and make this
[28:02] oh, you have to go ahead and make this decision by yourself and get to to get
[28:04] decision by yourself and get to to get the outcome."
[28:06] the outcome." Yeah.
[28:07] Yeah. This is really good, but you have to So,
[28:10] This is really good, but you have to So, I I wouldn't think about this on the
[28:11] I I wouldn't think about this on the spot. So, when I heard this, I'm like
[28:13] spot. So, when I heard this, I'm like she would have she would have bought.
[28:15] she would have she would have bought. >> [laughter]
[28:16] >> [laughter] >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
[28:16] >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. No, and and it's good to and
[28:19] Yeah. Yeah. No, and and it's good to and and this is what you should always do.
[28:20] and this is what you should always do. This is what you should always do. And
[28:21] This is what you should always do. And And just understand, thinking like this,
[28:23] And just understand, thinking like this, it is a skill. It is a muscle and it is
[28:26] it is a skill. It is a muscle and it is something that you build over time. So,
[28:29] something that you build over time. So, each each time each time I would get an
[28:31] each each time each time I would get an objection, like I'll go back and I'll
[28:33] objection, like I'll go back and I'll like I'll do call reviews
[28:36] like I'll do call reviews on objections that I didn't overcome.
[28:38] on objections that I didn't overcome. And then I'm going to look at like what
[28:40] And then I'm going to look at like what the actual belief was and um
[28:45] like what the belief was and I always
[28:46] like what the belief was and I always want to put it into A equals B.
[28:50] want to put it into A equals B. Okay? And then I'll go through and I'll
[28:53] Okay? And then I'll go through and I'll see how I can change this. And what's
[28:55] see how I can change this. And what's the most effective way to change this so
[28:58] the most effective way to change this so that way I'm like this is the way now I
[29:00] that way I'm like this is the way now I think about beliefs.
[29:02] think about beliefs. Do I need to change A? Do I need to
[29:04] Do I need to change A? Do I need to change the equal sign? Do I need to
[29:05] change the equal sign? Do I need to change B? That's why studying the NLP
[29:07] change B? That's why studying the NLP techniques we're talking about like
[29:10] techniques we're talking about like changing the meaning.
[29:12] changing the meaning. Okay, so we change the meaning.
[29:15] Okay, so we change the meaning. Okay, I think like two is changing the
[29:17] Okay, I think like two is changing the cause.
[29:19] cause. Uh three is like logical levels.
[29:22] Uh three is like logical levels. I always forget number four.
[29:25] I always forget number four. Okay? But actually going through and
[29:27] Okay? But actually going through and studying this stuff,
[29:28] studying this stuff, >> [snorts]
[29:28] >> [snorts] >> you start to understand exactly how we
[29:31] >> you start to understand exactly how we attack these beliefs. The easiest ones
[29:33] attack these beliefs. The easiest ones to do are always going to be changing
[29:35] to do are always going to be changing the meaning.
[29:37] the meaning. Right? Of like what does respect
[29:38] Right? Of like what does respect actually mean?
[29:40] actually mean? And changing logical levels. Okay? Hey,
[29:43] And changing logical levels. Okay? Hey, we're not even talking about respect
[29:45] we're not even talking about respect right now. We're talking about the
[29:46] right now. We're talking about the person who we want to be.
[29:48] person who we want to be. Two easiest things to do. So, if you're
[29:50] Two easiest things to do. So, if you're ever lost and you're like, "Oh, I don't
[29:52] ever lost and you're like, "Oh, I don't really understand this belief." Just
[29:53] really understand this belief." Just change the logical levels.
[29:55] change the logical levels. Right? It's the easiest one to always
[29:57] Right? It's the easiest one to always do. It's like, "Hey, we're not talking
[29:59] do. It's like, "Hey, we're not talking about this. We're talking about that."
[30:00] about this. We're talking about that." Hey, we're not talking about like really
[30:02] Hey, we're not talking about like really respect right now.
[30:03] respect right now. That's not even the main focus. The main
[30:06] That's not even the main focus. The main focus we should be looking at right now
[30:07] focus we should be looking at right now is going to be the type of person who
[30:09] is going to be the type of person who we're going to be when we go to bed
[30:10] we're going to be when we go to bed tonight.
[30:12] tonight. Because we have two options. And you
[30:13] Because we have two options. And you just go right into it. So, you just you
[30:16] just go right into it. So, you just you basically you push them into an
[30:18] basically you push them into an objection that you're much more
[30:19] objection that you're much more comfortable handling. All right, so
[30:21] comfortable handling. All right, so hopefully this training has been
[30:22] hopefully this training has been helpful. And if you want help for me
[30:23] helpful. And if you want help for me one-on-one to go ahead and get to the
[30:25] one-on-one to go ahead and get to the point where you're doubling, tripling
[30:26] point where you're doubling, tripling what you're doing, check out the first
[30:28] what you're doing, check out the first link in the description. If not, leave a
[30:30] link in the description. If not, leave a comment on your biggest takeaways and
[30:31] comment on your biggest takeaways and I'll see you guys on the next one.