# If you want 2026 to be the best year of your life, please watch this video...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vhOV_Od0A3M

[00:00] I've put together the most valuable
[00:01] lessons that have helped me achieve more
[00:02] out of my life. Hopefully, they're
[00:04] useful for you, too. Enjoy. This is
[00:06] brutally honest advice for poor people.
[00:08] I've been there. I had to pay rent.
[00:10] Every night, I would think if I didn't
[00:11] wake up tomorrow, I would be okay with
[00:12] it. And I don't want that for anybody.
[00:14] [music] I get it.
[00:20] I was just going through all these old
[00:21] files yesterday and I saw a goal that I
[00:23] had written, which was to make $10,000 a
[00:26] month income. And so it was 13 years
[00:29] ago. And so like I viscerally remember
[00:33] what that was like. Um and I know I
[00:36] never I was in so much pain during that
[00:39] during that time that I get it. And so
[00:42] like the reason we make this stuff is
[00:44] cuz I I've been there and I don't want
[00:46] that for anybody, you know? Like I
[00:48] missed I missed my 20s. Like I just I
[00:52] didn't have them as people traditionally
[00:54] say it, you know? Like it's it's weird
[00:57] because in today's like internet culture
[00:58] like I started my I I started my first
[01:01] brickandmortar business like storefront.
[01:04] I was 23. Like I didn't know [ __ ] about
[01:06] [ __ ] Like I knew nothing. And like I
[01:09] didn't know you could hire employees.
[01:11] Like it wasn't a thought. Like I didn't
[01:13] know anything. Um, and so like I
[01:18] cleaned, I did the billing, I did the
[01:21] sales, I taught the sessions, like I
[01:23] fixed the equipment, like I did
[01:25] everything because I didn't know you
[01:26] could and I also I did I didn't know and
[01:28] I didn't have the money, frankly, to
[01:30] afford anything else. And so, um, I get
[01:35] it. Like I get I get I get it. Um,
[01:41] but to get out of that, you have to take
[01:44] steps. And the first step is saying that
[01:46] it's my fault. The second step is that
[01:49] you have to use what you have.
[01:52] And so in the beginning I would I would
[01:55] you know I I was reading the self-help
[01:56] books and all this stuff. And um none of
[02:00] them really hit for me because a lot of
[02:02] it was like power of positive thinking
[02:04] and like affirmations and like all this
[02:07] stuff. And the reason I make the content
[02:08] I do now, which has now almost become
[02:09] like a shtick, um, countering that is be
[02:13] is because it didn't work for me. And
[02:15] I'm trying like I'm not trying to speak
[02:16] to everybody. If you if that works for
[02:18] you, then like awesome. Like awesome.
[02:22] Like I people mistake me saying this is
[02:24] what worked for me with this is what I
[02:26] think everyone should do. And it it
[02:28] couldn't be further from the truth. I'm
[02:29] saying if what h what you have been
[02:30] doing hasn't been working, then consider
[02:33] this. which is that like I remember
[02:35] because I just read this yesterday. The
[02:37] intro in the book I say um I wish I
[02:41] could tell you that the reason I was
[02:43] able to make it out of the gym
[02:46] was because I was like really passionate
[02:48] about changing people's lives and I
[02:49] loved fitness and I loved you know my
[02:51] clients faces when they would light up
[02:52] and they'd step on the scale and they'd
[02:54] lose weight. They'd be able to fit in
[02:55] their high school clothes again. It was
[02:57] none of that. It was just the sheer
[02:59] anger that I had, but the idea of being
[03:01] wrong and having the people back home
[03:05] be right about everything. And I just
[03:08] couldn't I couldn't I mean I still can
[03:10] barely tolerate it. And so I mean I took
[03:14] in some ways and this isn't a I don't if
[03:17] woe is me is the right is the right term
[03:19] but like I had an otherwise very
[03:21] successful career. like I was in a white
[03:24] collar job and sometimes it's hard like
[03:27] I mean hey I don't know I haven't been
[03:29] the other situation but taking a step
[03:31] down and humbling yourself to minimum
[03:33] wage after you've been in a white collar
[03:35] situation not easy and I remember I had
[03:38] clients who walk in and be like oh did
[03:39] you did you uh did you go to college and
[03:41] they were saying that um patronizingly
[03:45] um and mind you everyone here at least
[03:48] this channel knows that I don't I don't
[03:49] give a [ __ ] um but they were saying it
[03:52] to basically like when I was going to
[03:53] like write something down, like am I
[03:55] literate?
[03:57] And in those moments again, it was like
[04:00] I could be right or be rich. Like I
[04:01] could try and humiliate them back
[04:02] because the pain of what they just said
[04:04] made me feel. They probably didn't even
[04:05] intend that.
[04:07] Or I can be like, "Yeah, yeah, I went to
[04:10] I went to school. I'm very grateful for
[04:11] it." You know, like so what are your
[04:12] goals? I could just move right past it.
[04:14] And so you develop that skin because I
[04:16] had to cuz I had to [ __ ] pay rent.
[04:18] And so I mean I tell stories about
[04:21] having a kid drawing marker on the wall
[04:23] while I'm trying to close his mom and
[04:25] he's writing in permanent marker and I'm
[04:27] trying not to lose my [ __ ] over the fact
[04:28] that I'm have to repaint the wall
[04:30] because she doesn't know how to parent a
[04:31] child. But I needed to close the card to
[04:33] pay for the paint. And so it's like I
[04:36] can scold the kid and lose the sale or I
[04:38] can close the sale and keep my cool and
[04:40] then eventually clean the clean the
[04:41] wall. And so like you only get that
[04:44] stuff by doing it. Um, and so if you're
[04:47] in if you're in a place right now where
[04:50] you don't have a lot, you only have one
[04:53] thing, which is time. And so you have
[04:56] lower leverage. So I'm not going to lie
[04:57] to you and say that you like you're
[04:59] there there's this one play, this one
[05:01] secret. No, it's just it's sheer brute
[05:03] force. Like you have to will yourself
[05:05] out of it. Like there's you have to do
[05:08] it's it's like a it's a it's a huge
[05:10] amount of of soul driving energy that
[05:14] you have to do outside of what you
[05:16] normally do. So it's like you have to
[05:18] live one person's normal life. You have
[05:20] to do your normal work, your normal job.
[05:21] You have to eat, you have to sleep, you
[05:22] have to clean, you have to do whatever
[05:23] else and then then the workday starts.
[05:28] So that is how you eat today, but you're
[05:30] trying to get ahead and you have to eat
[05:31] tomorrow. And so you have to you have to
[05:33] you have to eat the glass so that you
[05:36] can take the pain today and you're
[05:37] trying to take as much of the pain from
[05:39] tomorrow as you can today so you can get
[05:42] ahead and like the even the concept of
[05:45] getting ahead. I like I think about this
[05:47] visually which is like if you have this
[05:48] this timeline of life that you can pull
[05:51] towards you and it's glass in the
[05:54] beginning and then it's slightly less
[05:56] less coarse and then less coarse and
[05:57] then it gets and then it gets neutral
[05:59] and then it starts to get a little bit
[06:00] sweeter and a little bit sweeter and a
[06:01] little bit sweeter but you have to get
[06:02] through that glass period where you pull
[06:04] it towards you and I do have this theory
[06:06] that like on a long enough time horizon
[06:08] and if we could live a thousand years
[06:10] everyone would eventually be successful
[06:12] but people wait too long and they die
[06:14] too early and I say die too really on a
[06:16] long on a long timeline. And so I want I
[06:20] have to live today and tomorrow and the
[06:22] next day so I can live three days at a
[06:24] time so I can get to my second and third
[06:26] life's benefits now. And so that was why
[06:30] like I remember the only times that I
[06:32] took off when I was when I was at the
[06:34] gym and one of the biggest things that I
[06:36] was grateful for with the gyms is that I
[06:38] moved across the country and so I knew
[06:40] no one. I was in Huntington Beach. I was
[06:41] from Baltimore like no one. And what
[06:44] would happen, so one of the gifts of
[06:45] that was that once the week was over, so
[06:47] my Saturday sessions were done at like
[06:49] noon, my phone didn't ring. No, like in
[06:53] some ways very sad because like no one
[06:56] wanted to see Alex, you know what I
[06:57] mean? Like no one was inviting me out.
[06:59] But I was like, well [ __ ] like I got to
[07:01] make this work. And so I would just I'd
[07:05] sit there and I'd be like, how do I sell
[07:06] memberships? How do I market? How do I
[07:08] everything, you know? But I but that was
[07:10] how I got ahead. And so I I tell the
[07:14] stories of like I remember when I when I
[07:16] stopped watching the Ravens and I was
[07:18] from Baltimore, so that was like like a
[07:21] tie to home.
[07:27] And so um yeah, it's fresh for me cuz I
[07:29] just read the story yesterday, but
[07:31] [sighs] it was like it was tough.
[07:42] I'll catch my breath. So, [sighs]
[07:44] all that to say,
[07:46] the sacrifices that I encourage people
[07:48] to take are not sacrifices I did not
[07:50] make.
[07:51] And I I don't say that there there's
[07:55] there's no ways to to get there. I'm
[07:58] just saying that this is the way I got
[07:59] there.
[08:01] And if this path works for you, then
[08:04] maybe it works better than what you're
[08:05] doing right now, which is I had a lot of
[08:08] pain.
[08:09] And so I I tried to use it. I just used
[08:13] what I had. I just, you know, I was just
[08:15] angry. I didn't I didn't want to fail.
[08:17] And so I just kept going. And so there
[08:21] was no like there just wasn't another
[08:24] option. And so I think that's like
[08:28] that's what I would encourage people to
[08:29] think about was like they're just there
[08:32] I just didn't I didn't allow another
[08:35] option because the other option was just
[08:37] was just worse than dying because
[08:42] I mean I've told this story before and
[08:43] things get hyperbolized mean you know
[08:45] exaggerated romanticized whatever but
[08:47] like when I had my big consulting job I
[08:50] was making good money and I had the
[08:53] approval of my my peers and all this
[08:55] stuff and I just didn't want to wake up
[08:58] the next day every day and it wasn't
[08:59] like I was trying to kill myself. It
[09:00] wasn't that. But I was I every night I
[09:02] would think if I didn't wake up tomorrow
[09:03] I would be okay with it. And so
[09:07] when I knew that that was what I was
[09:10] going back to if I didn't make this
[09:12] work. I just had I had no plan B. I mean
[09:16] I had plan B is that I would drive Uber
[09:18] and strip. I joke about that. But that
[09:20] was very much my plan B if I didn't make
[09:21] it work. Um, but
[09:26] and I I I get I get grilled on social
[09:28] media for saying this because of like
[09:30] [ __ ] race wars, but like there have
[09:34] been slaves for thousands of years.
[09:37] There were slaves in Egyptian times.
[09:38] There were Jews who were slaves. There
[09:40] were Persian slaves. There were white
[09:41] slaves. There are backslaves. Humans
[09:43] have enslaved one another. Period. And I
[09:46] like to think of things in extremes
[09:48] because it allows me to think about
[09:49] what's possible. And so the idea that
[09:52] someone else at some other time in
[09:54] history has worked seven days a week,
[09:57] every hour that they're awake with a
[09:59] threat not of their own death, but of
[10:00] their children's death, because that's
[10:02] what I would do if I were trying to
[10:03] control somebody. I would take their
[10:04] kids and say, "I'll kill them if you
[10:06] don't work." And guess what? They'll
[10:07] probably work. That that capacity
[10:11] exists. And so I would think to myself
[10:14] like
[10:16] I would try and I would try and put
[10:17] myself in that frame so that I wouldn't
[10:20] get into the woe is me cycle and think
[10:24] all these things I could blame for why
[10:26] I'm here right now. Why isn't this
[10:27] working as fast? Like how is it that
[10:30] these guys are making more money than
[10:31] me? Like why don't these people will
[10:33] give me the respect I deserve? Blah blah
[10:35] blah blah blah. Um and just say like
[10:38] well, what can I do now? And so it was I
[10:41] And then just every hour of every day,
[10:47] have to learn how to market. I have to
[10:49] learn how to sell. I have to I have to
[10:51] go to these these groups that where
[10:53] other gym owners are and I got to learn
[10:55] their stuff. I got to I got to go to
[10:57] these seminars. I got to save up so I
[10:58] can learn some stuff. And that's what I
[11:02] did. And so that's how I got out of it.
[11:04] That visual of life as this like bloody
[11:07] game of tugof-war where like most people
[11:09] their hands just get too
[11:11] >> cut to keep holding on to the rope is
[11:13] like it's in it's stuck in my head.
[11:15] >> Yeah.
[11:16] >> It's that's really powerful.
[11:17] >> Yeah. It was tough.
[11:20] >> So I'm I'm
[11:23] the first 100 grand is the hardest. And
[11:26] I know that that sounds like an
[11:27] unfathomable amount of money. It took me
[11:29] five years. Like I get it. So, like
[11:34] you just have to save it $1 at a time.
[11:36] Like that's like that's what it is. Now,
[11:38] obviously I talk about other things.
[11:39] Like
[11:41] there are smarter ways to make money for
[11:43] sure. Like if you can sell expensive
[11:45] stuff, you can just move the decimals.
[11:46] Like I mean like the thing is is
[11:50] it is factually true. It is spiritually
[11:52] false. And I don't even believe in
[11:54] spirituality in general, but like it is
[11:57] it is tough to sell a $10 million
[12:01] building and make a million dollar
[12:03] commission or a $500,000 commission when
[12:06] you are broke as [ __ ] It is very like
[12:09] it is like you would have to become a
[12:11] different person, which is why most
[12:12] people's first sale is not that. But is
[12:14] it technically possible? Yes. A lot of
[12:17] people watch YouTube and the internet
[12:20] for complex money-making skills and they
[12:23] haven't even mastered showing up on
[12:25] time. And so it's like they want to go
[12:28] straight to calculus, but they don't
[12:29] know how to do simple addition. But the
[12:31] thing is is that like simple addition is
[12:33] foundational to that. And none of the
[12:35] other stuff will matter unless you can
[12:37] do the basics. But the basics doesn't
[12:39] make them less important. Usually
[12:41] they're the foundation of a building
[12:42] which make them arguably more important.
[12:44] They just are simpler to understand but
[12:47] not simpler to do. And I think that's
[12:49] the big disconnect a lot of people have
[12:50] is that they think they because they
[12:52] understand something conceptually that
[12:53] they feel like they have already
[12:54] mastered the skill which are two very
[12:56] different things.
[12:58] And so one of the most common traits
[13:00] that people who are poor have is that
[13:03] it's always tomorrow. And so they never
[13:05] talk about anything in terms of today.
[13:07] And so it's about starting tomorrow, the
[13:09] diet tomorrow, the diet on Monday, next
[13:11] year, my New Year's resolution. It's
[13:12] always it's always pushing off. So
[13:14] rather than uh delaying gratification,
[13:18] they delay pain. And so rather than
[13:20] trying taking pain now for pleasure
[13:23] later, they take pleasure now and pain
[13:26] later. And so they flip the equation.
[13:28] And so they're surprised when today is
[13:31] later from yesterday that they're in
[13:34] pain. Because if if last week you were
[13:38] like, I'm starting my diet this week,
[13:41] then it is now this week and you've
[13:43] delayed the pain to today. And that
[13:46] means that the body you have right now
[13:47] is the result of the delayed pain that
[13:50] you are now forcing yourself to endure.
[13:52] And so
[13:54] they're somehow surprised when the bill
[13:56] comes due that they pushed off from the
[13:59] past. And so the first lesson of getting
[14:02] out of poverty is two words. It's my
[14:05] fault. It's I have to own that. And I
[14:08] think my fault you can kind of
[14:09] extrapolate to right now. Not like you
[14:12] basically have to own everything that
[14:14] passed to this moment. So, all the pain
[14:16] that I've gone through, all of the
[14:17] Mondays that I've missed, all of the
[14:19] diets that I've skipped, all of the
[14:20] savings I haven't made, all of those are
[14:24] not my dad's fault, my mom's fault, my
[14:26] circumstances fault, the country I was
[14:27] born in's fault, the zip code, any of
[14:29] those things fault. It's just mine. And
[14:31] the thing is is that people have this
[14:33] belief that because they have a strong
[14:34] argument for why it's something or
[14:36] someone else's fault that that somehow
[14:38] helps them.
[14:40] And it just doesn't because whatever you
[14:43] cast blame to is where you also cast
[14:46] power to. And so if I say I can't
[14:50] succeed because my mom didn't love me,
[14:52] guess who controls me? My mom. And so if
[14:56] you also like replace my mom with a
[15:00] race, a gender, a political party,
[15:04] whatever the thing like I can't succeed
[15:05] because of Trump's laws. I can't succeed
[15:08] because of the radical left, because of
[15:10] wokeism, because of whatever. You
[15:12] actually give that thing more power in
[15:14] your life than you give yourself. And so
[15:17] it's completely it the thing is is that
[15:19] and this is what's so deceiving about it
[15:21] is it's very it's very um
[15:23] self-fulfilling is that you get more
[15:25] evidence and you get more confirmation.
[15:27] You get more evidence, you get more
[15:28] confirmation, and the more your life
[15:29] sucks, the more you're confirmed that
[15:30] you were right. But like, do you want to
[15:34] be right about the fact that your life
[15:36] sucks
[15:38] or would you rather like there's a
[15:40] there's I think it's an old Zig Ziggler
[15:41] saying he said you can either be right
[15:42] or you can be rich. And I mean it's
[15:45] simple, but this is what he was getting
[15:46] at is that you can say, you know what,
[15:49] you are right. Your dad kicked the [ __ ]
[15:50] out of your whole life and you don't
[15:51] have any confidence because he told you
[15:52] a piece of [ __ ] every day. You're right.
[15:56] But in order to be rich, you need to let
[15:58] that go. Because every day you say that
[16:00] I'm not successful because of this, it
[16:03] means because this now owns you. And for
[16:07] me personally, that realization that the
[16:10] thing that I hated most in the world,
[16:12] the things that I blamed for why my life
[16:14] wasn't the way it was, I was their
[16:17] [ __ ] And just realizing that um made
[16:21] me angry. But through that anger, I was
[16:24] able to say, "Well, [ __ ] them." like I
[16:27] will succeed despite the fact that my
[16:29] dad said this or my mom said this or
[16:31] Barack Obama said this or Trump said
[16:32] this or the woke left says what? Despite
[16:36] that, despite the fact that the chips
[16:37] are stacked against me, I will still
[16:40] win. Why does saying my fault and taking
[16:43] that accountability begin to set someone
[16:44] down the path of making more money?
[16:47] >> And so if you think about if we think
[16:49] about success in terms of layers like
[16:50] foundations, right? the the the base
[16:55] level like when you're digging the
[16:56] building where you put the hole and you
[16:58] pour the concrete and the base of the
[16:59] entire thing is who is in power? Who is
[17:04] source? Because if it's anything but you
[17:07] in that base layer, all of the other
[17:09] things on top of them will topple down.
[17:12] It's it's a foundation of sand.
[17:14] Otherwise, you can't build on top of
[17:16] blaming other people. There's nothing
[17:18] that stands on it. You see like I want
[17:20] to learn sales but I can't learn sales
[17:23] because I didn't get hugged enough as a
[17:26] kid and so I don't like people. And so
[17:28] as long as you keep holding on to that
[17:29] you have sand as your foundation. But if
[17:32] you want to learn how to sell or you
[17:33] want to learn how to market or you want
[17:34] to learn how to do whatever until you
[17:37] say well it's my fault that I don't know
[17:39] it
[17:40] and because of that it's within my power
[17:43] to change it.
[17:44] >> So it's not sales books. It's not it's
[17:47] not reading offers. It's not it's not
[17:48] even your books
[17:49] >> at the at the very beginning you have to
[17:51] accept that which is the first two words
[17:52] my fault my responsibility all me I am
[17:57] source
[17:58] and then once you can accept that one
[18:00] thing and what's crazy is that that one
[18:02] foundation is where 90% of people
[18:04] literally aren't they're not there they
[18:07] can't do it the reason my girlfriend
[18:10] left me is because of this not me the
[18:12] reason I lost my job is because my my
[18:13] employer was a dick my boss sucked
[18:15] whatever the economy Like but like it
[18:19] never serves you. Like give me one
[18:22] instance, one example. This is to anyone
[18:25] who's listening to this. One example of
[18:27] when you blame something else and it
[18:30] made you better.
[18:32] One. You can't find it because it's
[18:34] fundamentally not true. And so you
[18:37] cannot both desire to get better and
[18:40] also maintain blame. You have to pick.
[18:43] >> When did this really hit home for you?
[18:45] Was it when you lost money?
[18:47] >> No, when I was 19 years old, I had to
[18:49] write an essay about uh depression in an
[18:52] intro to sight class. And I used to I
[18:55] don't talk about my mother my mother
[18:56] very much, but I used to harp a lot. I
[18:58] was an equal I was an equal opportunity
[19:00] angry person. I was angry at everybody.
[19:03] In other words, I blamed everyone. And
[19:05] so I blamed her for X, Y, and Z. And I
[19:09] remember having to write this
[19:13] essay on depression and you had to do it
[19:16] from someone else's perspective. And so
[19:17] you had to say how would they how would
[19:20] the environment and their upbringing
[19:21] things like that contribute to
[19:25] the outcomes in their life. And so by
[19:27] writing the essay, true or not, to be
[19:30] clear, about my mother's upbringing and
[19:33] how hard she had as an immigrant coming
[19:35] here, getting beat up as a kid, getting
[19:36] made up for not being able to speak the
[19:37] language, all that kind of stuff. And
[19:39] this was in the [ __ ] 50s. It's when
[19:41] like it was more accepted to beat up
[19:43] foreigners rather than let them in.
[19:45] Anyways, um
[19:48] so she had a tough time and so it made
[19:51] sense and and when I framed it like
[19:53] that, I was like, you know, maybe she's
[19:54] actually a massive success given where
[19:57] she started. And so then I thought to
[20:00] myself, now mind you, I still wasn't
[20:03] over it. But it was in this process that
[20:06] the first thing that happened is when I
[20:07] went back home for fall break or winter
[20:09] break, I remember she said something to
[20:11] me which would normally just like be the
[20:12] beginning of some big fight. you know,
[20:14] you get into these routines. Like, I'll
[20:15] say this thing that we both hate and
[20:16] then we'll just get in a nice fight
[20:17] about it. And she said the trigger and I
[20:19] was just like,
[20:21] I understand you. I'm sorry you went
[20:24] through the stuff you went through. And
[20:26] she just like looked completely shocked
[20:28] and then just like started balling. And
[20:31] so I was like, we're cool. Like you
[20:35] don't anger me anymore. And I think for
[20:37] the most part since then, like that's
[20:38] been more or less the dynamic that
[20:40] shifted.
[20:42] But leading into that was also the idea
[20:44] that all the relationships that I had
[20:48] had that id blamed for not working
[20:50] because of the dynamic that I had with
[20:51] my mother. I was like I am giving her
[20:56] this power over my love life.
[21:00] That's gross. And so I was like well I
[21:03] I'd rather just say it's on me to change
[21:05] and not have my mom or parents at all
[21:08] involved in my relationships. And so
[21:11] that was me taking it's her fault that I
[21:14] can't make these things work. I have
[21:16] commitment issues. I don't want to get
[21:17] close to people. I've been hurt before.
[21:19] Blah blah blah. To like, okay, well,
[21:22] let's take it to the next extreme.
[21:23] Great. You're right. You'll never be
[21:26] close to anyone. You'll never have a
[21:28] relationship that'll last. You're right.
[21:31] Now what?
[21:33] I remember I was at a conference and I
[21:36] had this lady stand up in the crowd and
[21:40] I had just done a thing on like I don't
[21:42] remember what it was called offers and
[21:44] she stood up [sighs] and said let me
[21:46] give you six reasons why this isn't
[21:47] going to work for my business and so she
[21:50] went down her list and I was like uh-huh
[21:52] uh-huh uh-huh. So I got to the end of
[21:53] the whole thing and um she said and
[21:56] that's why this isn't going to work for
[21:58] my business and I was like you're right
[21:59] you'll never be able to make this work
[22:01] for your business. And she looked at me
[22:04] like angry and she lashed back. She was
[22:07] like, "Yes, I yes I will. I'll be able
[22:09] to make this work for my business for
[22:10] this reason, this reason." And so the
[22:12] thing is is that like if the victim
[22:14] frame is just taken to the natural
[22:16] extreme, you realize that you're right,
[22:18] you win the game. And by being right the
[22:20] entire time, you lose everything. And so
[22:23] it's one of these frames that I love.
[22:24] Dr. Cashy says this. He says, "You're
[22:26] 99% right, but 100% wrong." And what
[22:30] that means is like
[22:32] for example, if I every time I bring a
[22:34] girl home and I want my parents
[22:36] approval, I bring her home and they say,
[22:38] "This isn't the one. This isn't the one.
[22:40] She's not good enough." Whatever it is,
[22:41] every time it's easy for them to say
[22:43] that because every single person you
[22:45] date, except for the one you marry, they
[22:47] are right on. And so they're 99% of the
[22:50] time they're right. And they're
[22:51] confirmed by saying that that person
[22:53] that you bring home is not good enough.
[22:54] Because every time eventually you break
[22:56] up, oh, it's not going to last. This
[22:58] isn't the one. and it keeps going,
[22:59] right? But if you keep doing that all
[23:01] the way to the natural extreme, you're
[23:03] 100% wrong because you will be wrong
[23:05] eventually. It's the same thing as like,
[23:07] I want to start this business, it's not
[23:09] going to work. It's not going to work.
[23:10] The second one will work. The fifth one
[23:11] won't work. The seventh one work won't
[23:13] work. And they're right, but they're
[23:15] just wrong on the long enough time
[23:17] horizon because one of them will [ __ ]
[23:19] work. And one of the girls or one of the
[23:21] guys that you bring home will be the one
[23:23] that you are going to be with. But it's
[23:25] so much safer for them to be right and
[23:27] right and right and you and they get
[23:31] deceived by their short-term rightness
[23:33] that they miss the long-term wrong. And
[23:35] we do this to oursel too when you're in
[23:37] the victim frame. I don't even like
[23:39] using the victim frame, but when you're
[23:40] in the powerless frame, you give the
[23:42] power away and you get to be right over
[23:44] that's why it didn't work. This didn't
[23:46] work. This relationship won't work. This
[23:47] job won't work. You keep it's not going
[23:48] to work this time either. Because you
[23:49] get to be right over and over again. and
[23:50] it makes you feel good in the short
[23:51] term, but in the long term, you
[23:53] guarantee the loss.
[23:55] >> I think there's also like social
[23:56] reinforcement. Like we love to complain
[23:58] about the weather and
[23:59] >> it's literally the same thing as never
[24:01] investing. Like if you want to invest
[24:03] your money, right, and you like you have
[24:05] all this big pile of savings. If you
[24:08] ever invest, there's always the
[24:09] possibility that it goes down in the
[24:10] short term. It's just the nature of
[24:12] markets in general. But if you never
[24:14] invest, you guarantee that you will
[24:16] never get rich over the long haul. And
[24:18] so every day you could make this risk.
[24:21] You take a small risk, but you guarantee
[24:23] a macro win. So you take a small risk
[24:26] today, potential for loss today for the
[24:28] guarantee over the long haul that it
[24:29] grows and it makes you money. But the
[24:32] flip side is you don't take the small
[24:34] risk of loss today. You take the comfort
[24:36] today for the guarantee that you get the
[24:38] long loss. And so so many people flip
[24:40] their life to that same thing is that
[24:42] they have they flip the pleasure for
[24:45] today and they and they they just forget
[24:47] the second half of this which is pain
[24:49] for tomorrow and that today is also
[24:52] yesterday's tomorrow and we're living
[24:54] through the pain that you cast like you
[24:56] own this and until you're like this is
[24:58] my fault that I'm in pain today because
[25:00] of decisions that I put off pain for
[25:02] tomorrow where today is tomorrow. When
[25:04] you're broke, every dollar means so much
[25:07] to you.
[25:09] But
[25:11] and you want to see the dollars in your
[25:13] bank account go up. But I never made
[25:16] that my goal. I made the amount of money
[25:19] I made every month my goal because I saw
[25:22] that as my like potential energy versus
[25:24] stored energy. Not to get I mean
[25:27] whatever physics people, you get what
[25:28] I'm saying. And so I was willing to take
[25:31] that stored energy and reinvest it to
[25:34] take $5,000 a month in income to make it
[25:36] $6,000 a month because I knew that over
[25:38] a year I was going to make 12. And so if
[25:40] it cost me two to make the 12 in income,
[25:42] I would make that trade every time. And
[25:44] so whenever I'd save up a small like
[25:46] nut, now obviously I've always been
[25:49] pretty good at about spending money.
[25:50] Like I I' I haven't had that that habit.
[25:53] So like again foundations like first
[25:55] it's your fault. Second spend less than
[25:57] you make. Third, take all of the excess
[26:00] and spend it on making more because if
[26:02] you're making minimum wage, I'm gonna
[26:06] say what you probably already know.
[26:08] You're not going to get ahead. Like,
[26:10] you're not going to save your way there.
[26:12] You're not like, everyone loves to tell
[26:13] the story of that one girl at
[26:14] McDonald's, but you know, they don't
[26:15] tell the other 100 million people who
[26:17] worked at McDonald's over over the world
[26:19] who didn't make it. And like the outcome
[26:21] they're talking about is like she made
[26:22] $8 million over 40 years working
[26:24] McDonald's. like you can shoot for more.
[26:28] And so like take the money you make,
[26:31] live on nothing, and the hard part is to
[26:33] swallowing the pride for the fact that
[26:34] in the short term, everyone's going to
[26:36] be right when they say that you're
[26:37] amounting to nothing. And that's the
[26:39] tough part. That's the glass that you
[26:41] have to you have to swallow that. You
[26:42] have to pull towards you. And there's
[26:46] just no other way. Like you have to
[26:48] learn the skills. Now, I mean, to be
[26:50] fair, YouTube didn't exist [laughter]
[26:53] when I was doing this. And like
[26:55] Instagram was like a new platform. So
[26:57] like all this stuff like the stuff we
[26:59] have today is crazy. Like the fact that
[27:00] these videos and this podcast like all
[27:02] the stuff didn't ex like I remember when
[27:03] podcasting came out like I was already a
[27:05] business owner. Like none of this stuff
[27:07] existed. But at the time I just took all
[27:10] the money I had. And I I want to I want
[27:11] to make this point again is that people
[27:14] think that the money is about buying
[27:15] courses and stuff like that. And you can
[27:17] like there's nothing wrong with that.
[27:18] I've learned a ton from a lot of the
[27:19] stuff that I've bought to be really
[27:20] honest with you. But I think that I've
[27:22] always had an amazing return on
[27:23] education because I always did it. And I
[27:26] think like I always wanted to be the
[27:28] best student in every class and I was
[27:29] good at school and I and I I just took
[27:31] business as a different another another
[27:32] type of school. But part of the expenses
[27:34] that come into like what you take that
[27:36] money for is experiments that fail. And
[27:38] so one of the things that happens when
[27:40] you're broke is that you bet on stuff
[27:42] and then it doesn't work and people feel
[27:44] like they're back at zero. But you're
[27:45] not back at zero. you're at where you
[27:47] were plus one experience, plus two
[27:50] experiences, plus three experiences,
[27:51] plus four experience. But when you have
[27:52] plus 18 experiences, all of a sudden,
[27:55] boop, you level up one. You get
[27:57] experience points. There's a reason in
[27:58] video games call experience points. So,
[28:00] you didn't trade it for nothing. You got
[28:01] an experience point. And with enough
[28:03] experience points, you get to the next
[28:04] level. And so, I think if you just even
[28:06] thought about it like that, it's not a
[28:07] loss, but an experience point. It could
[28:08] get you could bridge the gap between
[28:10] your current income level and the income
[28:11] level that you want to get to. And then
[28:12] guess what? There's more experience
[28:14] point that you have to get there. And
[28:15] those experience points also cost more
[28:17] money. Because when you take a bet in
[28:19] the beginning, and when I say it costs
[28:21] money, it's like if you run an ad and it
[28:23] doesn't work, it costs money. If you
[28:25] want to set up a Shopify store or an
[28:27] e-commerce store and you spend 30, 40,
[28:29] 50 bucks a month, whatever, it costs
[28:30] money. Um, and it does, you know, like
[28:33] all of these things cost money to start.
[28:35] Now, mind you, it cost a lot less than
[28:36] it did in the 20s when you had to
[28:37] mortgage your house and guarantee that
[28:38] you'd win or you'd lose everything
[28:40] forever. Um, so like the bar hasn't
[28:42] never been lower than it is now, but
[28:44] there still is a bar and you have to get
[28:45] over it. And I still think that the vast
[28:47] majority of the [ __ ] that people trying
[28:48] to get over has nothing to do with the
[28:50] difficulty of business. But the first
[28:52] step, the foundation, which is it is my
[28:53] fault that I am here and in it being my
[28:57] fault, I am the one who can get me out
[28:58] of it. It sounds like in that stage
[29:01] three when you start experimenting and
[29:02] investing in that and let's say the kid
[29:05] who has a failed drop shipping
[29:06] experiment or starts a school group and
[29:07] they want to win the school games but
[29:09] they don't. Their measuring stick for
[29:10] whether or not they're doing [snorts]
[29:11] well shouldn't be how much money they're
[29:13] making
[29:14] >> or should like should they be thinking
[29:16] about money at that point or
[29:19] >> so the wealthiest people I know
[29:22] only think about skills. They think
[29:25] about what can I learn and then what can
[29:26] this skill get me? And so they will
[29:30] always
[29:32] take any money they can to buy more
[29:34] skills.
[29:36] And in the beginning, you have to buy
[29:38] all the skills yourself. Once you have
[29:41] enough skills that you can generate an
[29:42] excess of income, you can start buying
[29:44] other people's lives. And what I mean by
[29:46] that is like everything comes down to
[29:47] buying time. And so at some point you're
[29:51] 10 years into your career and you have a
[29:52] handful of skills, but you can buy
[29:54] someone else's 10 years of skills by
[29:56] just paying them to do something, too.
[29:57] is you don't have to learn all those
[29:58] things. And so you do need to get good
[30:00] at stuff and then eventually you
[30:02] generalize to being good at people. And
[30:03] that's pretty much always the path for
[30:04] everyone.
[30:05] >> Maybe the framing is like a lot of
[30:07] people who are wanting to make more
[30:08] money just don't know what the avenues
[30:10] are.
[30:10] >> Yeah. So a lot of people who want to
[30:13] make money don't understand how money is
[30:15] made. And so it's made by getting it
[30:19] from someone else and they have to give
[30:21] it to you voluntarily or it's theft. And
[30:23] so assuming you don't want to steal,
[30:25] then you have to give something to
[30:27] someone else first. And then by doing
[30:30] that, they give you money in exchange,
[30:32] which is why I love capitalism. It's
[30:34] voluntary exchange between two parties.
[30:36] And both parties say thank you at the
[30:38] end because both parties think they're
[30:39] better off from the trade. And so the
[30:42] idea is what you want to be able to do
[30:44] is find something valuable to trade. And
[30:47] so you can either trade stuff, you can
[30:50] find a place where you can get stuff and
[30:52] then bring it to other people where it's
[30:54] convenient for them so they pay you more
[30:56] than you did when you had to go find it
[30:57] at some back alley cuz you know suburban
[31:00] mom doesn't want to go into back alley
[31:02] to get x y and z but you'll give it to
[31:04] her. Man, it sounds like I'm explaining
[31:05] drugs, but [laughter]
[31:08] well, there's a reason they make money.
[31:09] But anyways, point is is that you can
[31:11] sell stuff at a mar at a margin and a
[31:14] part of that margin is going to be the
[31:15] convenience that you deliver them. And
[31:17] either you're selling stuff that someone
[31:18] else manufactures or you create your own
[31:19] stuff. Now, if you're starting out,
[31:20] you're probably going to sell someone
[31:21] else's stuff. And I do think and I I
[31:23] mean I'm saying this right now,
[31:26] I do love the concept that the first
[31:29] thing you sell is not the last thing
[31:30] you're going to sell. And so learning to
[31:33] sell in and of itself, the best way to
[31:34] learn to sell is sell something. And
[31:36] that's why uh referral referral uh
[31:39] programs, ambassador programs, affiliate
[31:41] programs for different types of
[31:42] businesses, almost every business I've
[31:44] ever owned has an affiliate program. Um
[31:46] it's great to enroll in those. I'm not
[31:48] even going to say any of the names of
[31:49] the companies that that we have because
[31:50] I want you like it's not about that. I
[31:52] want you to if you can just because then
[31:54] you you only have to figure out one
[31:56] skill. Like if I just sell someone, if I
[31:57] just promote, I get paid. Cool. And I
[31:59] can just do it over and over again. Now
[32:01] over time you're like, man, I want to
[32:02] make more of the nut. Cool. Then you
[32:04] just you eat up more of the
[32:05] responsibility.
[32:07] So you can either sell stuff or you can
[32:11] sell skills. You can scale sell
[32:13] outcomes. And so that's where you
[32:15] develop a certain expertise. So like in
[32:17] the beginning for me and like the first
[32:18] time this ever like the first money I
[32:21] ever made from a stranger was that I had
[32:23] a lady at the gym. It's a real story. I
[32:26] was in really good shape. I like to
[32:28] think so. And she said,"Will you meet me
[32:31] uh and do a nutrition consultation for
[32:33] me?" And she didn't even say that. She
[32:35] said, "Will you help me with my food?" I
[32:36] think is what she said. And I said,
[32:37] "Sure." Um, and so we met at a at a
[32:40] pizza place, ironically.
[32:42] >> No, this was after college. This is
[32:44] after I graduated from college um when I
[32:46] was still consultant. So I I went we met
[32:48] at a pizza place. And I was like, "Okay,
[32:51] well, what are you currently eating?"
[32:53] And she was like, "This." And I was
[32:54] like, "Well, what do you want to do?"
[32:55] She's like, "I'm trying to lose weight."
[32:56] And I was like, "Well, this is something
[32:58] I eat for breakfast that's less calories
[33:00] than your thing. It's pretty good." And
[33:01] try this and try this and try this. And
[33:02] it took like an hour. And then um I had
[33:05] like a notepad and I gave her the the
[33:07] notes or whatever. And she took out her
[33:08] purse and she wrote $200 on a check and
[33:11] she handed it to me. She was like,
[33:12] "Thanks so much." And I was like
[33:17] looked I was just like looking at the
[33:19] check, looking at her, looking at the
[33:20] check, looking at her. And I was like,
[33:21] "Okay, don't act surprised." And I was
[33:22] like, "Uh, thanks." And then she left
[33:25] and I was like, "Holy shit." I was like,
[33:27] "I just got paid for." But like
[33:29] realistically, I'd been in at this point
[33:30] I was competing. So I'm winning. I'm
[33:32] like I had a state record at that point.
[33:33] Like I was in I was in shape, you know
[33:34] what I mean? Um and I think she knew I
[33:37] was a state record holder cuz the gym
[33:39] that I was powerlifting gym. Um but I
[33:42] had done some stuff. I had gotten some
[33:44] level of authority on some tiny thing
[33:46] and people were like, "Oh, can you help
[33:49] me with that, too?" And to be really
[33:51] honest with you, my entire life, and I'm
[33:53] saying like there's many paths, but like
[33:55] my life has been
[33:57] learn something, get good at it, have
[33:59] evidence that you were good at the
[34:00] thing, and then people ask you for help
[34:02] on that thing. And so, in the beginning,
[34:03] people asked me how to get in shape. And
[34:05] then I started a business around getting
[34:06] people in shape. And then people who had
[34:08] businesses around getting people in
[34:09] shape asked me how I was getting my
[34:11] businesses that were getting people in
[34:12] shape to work. And then people who had
[34:14] businesses that were national scale that
[34:16] helped people in a specific niche or
[34:17] industry started asking me how I was
[34:19] helping people in a specific niche or
[34:20] industry. And then people who had really
[34:22] big businesses just started asking me
[34:23] how did you get a really big business?
[34:24] And so like my entire life been simply
[34:27] doing as hard as I [ __ ] could to get
[34:29] good at something and then do it enough
[34:31] times. And to be really like very clear
[34:33] with you, every time I did it, it was
[34:35] not to move on to the next step. It was
[34:37] to just get good at the thing. And then
[34:39] by getting good at the thing, people
[34:40] asked me about it. And so it wasn't like
[34:42] I lost 10 pounds and then tried to start
[34:44] selling, you know, weight loss advice. I
[34:47] had multiple state records and I like
[34:50] I looked good, you know what I mean?
[34:52] Like I was in very good shape. And then
[34:55] people started asking me about it. And
[34:56] then I didn't have one gym and start
[34:59] telling people, hey, here's how you run
[35:00] a I had six gyms by the time I was 26.
[35:03] And then people were like, okay, you're
[35:04] 26 and you have six gyms and you did all
[35:06] cash flow. Like you're doing something
[35:07] right. And then people started asking me
[35:10] about the stuff. And then and then when
[35:12] I had the licensing business doing 4
[35:14] million a month, people who had other
[35:16] bigger businesses are doing a million a
[35:17] month or 500,000 a month. They're like,
[35:18] "How do you get to 4 million a month?"
[35:19] And I was like, "Well, this is what I
[35:21] did." And so, like, I've just tried to
[35:23] figure it out. And it's it's like the
[35:26] path has always been revealed as I took
[35:27] more steps. And so, I think a big
[35:30] fallacy in the early on days is trying
[35:31] to think that you're going to figure out
[35:32] the entire path before you even take the
[35:33] first step.
[35:34] >> It's just not true. Real quick, I have
[35:36] the most amazing offer for you, which is
[35:39] all three of my books for free. Uh, just
[35:43] cover the shipping. I think it's like
[35:44] five or six bucks in shipping uh per
[35:46] book. Um, you get the actual hardback
[35:48] shipped to you. And the reason for that
[35:50] is because some of you guys may know we
[35:52] had 3.6 million copies that were donated
[35:53] from entrepreneurs. And I'm doing my
[35:55] part to give the books away, but I'm
[35:57] also giving the other two books uh to
[36:00] anyone who want them, who choose to
[36:02] redeem it. All right. Last time I made
[36:03] this offer, uh, it sold out in like 10
[36:06] days. Uh, so I did buy a lot more books.
[36:08] Um, so if you see this, you know, go
[36:10] check it out. Go grab them. Um, these
[36:11] are obviously while supplies last. Um,
[36:13] because this lives in the video forever.
[36:15] And if you get there and it's not there,
[36:16] then, you know, don't get upset. All
[36:18] right, back to the video.
[36:20] >> I was going to ask, how important is it
[36:21] for someone to have that moment with the
[36:23] check where they just make their first
[36:25] Oh,
[36:25] >> I mean, in some ways, I think it's
[36:26] everything. In other ways, it's nothing.
[36:27] Like one of the cool um shameless plug
[36:30] for school, the um
[36:33] 30.44% of people who finish their first
[36:35] month of school make their first dollar
[36:36] online. And that's like so like
[36:41] like that's why we do it. You know what
[36:43] I mean? Like I know how hard that first
[36:46] dollar is. Like there's so much to get
[36:48] the first dollar across the because the
[36:49] second dollar comes so much faster after
[36:51] that. Um that I mean that's why that's
[36:54] why I invest in the company. That's why
[36:55] I'm so adamant about it. But um anyways,
[37:00] the the point is is that yes, I think
[37:03] having the first dollar get across is
[37:04] very important. But if you can reframe
[37:07] it from that experience points
[37:08] perspective, that there's there's
[37:09] there's probably three levels before
[37:11] that. You have to like level one is that
[37:13] you have to understand that it's my
[37:14] fault. Level two is that you have to use
[37:17] what you have, not what you wish you had
[37:19] to get to where you want to go. And
[37:21] where you want to go isn't 100 steps
[37:22] forward. It's just the next step. And so
[37:24] like I don't think that anger drives me
[37:26] as much as it used to,
[37:29] but it was everything that I had when I
[37:31] started. And so if I had listened to the
[37:34] positivity mantra when I started, I
[37:36] never would have gotten going because
[37:37] nothing made me feel happy. And so they
[37:40] were like, "Follow your passion." I was
[37:41] like, "My passion is to not be poor and
[37:44] to not be here in Baltimore. That's my
[37:47] passion is not be here." And so that's
[37:50] what drove me. And so I think that it
[37:52] just needs to be restated that like
[37:55] is that the goal? Sure. But is that
[37:58] necessary to start? No, it's not. And so
[38:02] I can tell you that even when I was
[38:03] angry um and getting through that,
[38:06] making more money did make my life
[38:08] better. Like I had more ability to deal
[38:10] with inconveniences, hassles, health
[38:12] issues from family members that I had to
[38:14] foot the bill for. Like all these things
[38:15] like money can provide value. And so,
[38:19] um, I'll say this thing that a mentor
[38:21] told me. He said, "Money does not buy
[38:22] happiness, but it can help you avoid
[38:24] pain."
[38:25] And so, like, I think there's nothing
[38:28] wrong with getting with making money.
[38:30] Obviously, I like doing it. Um, but I
[38:34] just hate
[38:36] the people who espouse that you have to
[38:38] feel a certain way to win or that or
[38:42] that winning when you are angry or sad
[38:45] or in pain or ashamed is somehow wrong.
[38:49] And so I just like you have to meet
[38:51] success where you're at. And if the
[38:53] first step you have to take out of anger
[38:54] and the next step you have to take out
[38:56] of sadness and the next one you have to
[38:57] take out of shame and use that to to
[38:59] propel yourself forward. All that
[39:00] matters you take the step.
[39:03] And one of the things that I always like
[39:04] is for a very long time I didn't
[39:05] consider myself a good person. I mean, I
[39:07] still probably don't, but um in terms of
[39:10] like I I always identified with the
[39:12] villain um and the oppressor in most
[39:15] scenarios, which is bad. But anyways,
[39:18] but I there's a point to this is that I
[39:22] never thought that I deserved
[39:25] the good life. I never thought I didn't
[39:26] think I deserve the happy ending. I'll
[39:28] put it that way. And so
[39:32] the thing that got me through that was
[39:35] the idea, and this felt like honestly
[39:36] like gaming the system. So like from the
[39:39] evil side, was that I could still get
[39:42] the good guy's ending if I just did the
[39:45] thing that they do to get the ending. So
[39:49] I didn't have to do it with pure
[39:51] intentions. I didn't have to do it as a
[39:53] great guy, but if I just still did the
[39:56] things, I could still get the getting.
[39:58] And I think for me that that realization
[40:01] has been why my ruthless focus on like
[40:04] well what did you do? And to everyone
[40:06] who listens to my stuff like it's like
[40:07] great throw the emotions out. Throw the
[40:11] spiritual energy vibrations out. What do
[40:13] you do?
[40:15] Patience is just figuring out what to do
[40:17] in the meantime. Like courage is acting
[40:20] as though you weren't afraid. Like like
[40:23] what do you do? And then eliminating
[40:25] everything else and then just doing that
[40:26] and then doing whatever mental tricks
[40:28] you have to do which is like there were
[40:29] slaves who work seven days a week. So
[40:30] can I like and then alternatively
[40:35] catastrophizing
[40:37] the alternative path which is that if I
[40:39] do not do anything
[40:41] this is what will happen eventually that
[40:43] pain in the future will be my pain today
[40:46] and then actively thinking about what
[40:48] that pain would be like and then seeing
[40:50] if that can make you more uncomfortable
[40:52] than the comfort that you're in. And I
[40:54] think I mean I think Tony Robbins says
[40:55] this. He says change happens when the
[40:58] pain of staying the same sorry when the
[41:00] pain of change is less than the pain of
[41:02] staying the same. And so if you're
[41:03] comfortable in staying the same the
[41:05] point is to make yourself more in pain
[41:08] to get yourself to move. And so I think
[41:11] there's a skill in being able to future
[41:13] pace and think through what pain you're
[41:16] going to go through. Like if you're like
[41:17] man okay I have gained 5 pounds a year
[41:20] and it has been four years so I'm 20
[41:22] pounds up. Well, if four years from now
[41:25] I'm another 20 pounds heavier and
[41:27] imagining the snide comments at the
[41:30] holiday party or the if you're a girl,
[41:33] the guy who says, "Man, she'd be really
[41:35] cute if she lost 40 lbs." Or like even
[41:39] like I'm I'm going girls perspective
[41:40] here. A guy who says something that's
[41:42] like, "Um,
[41:44] I would be with her, but she's just
[41:46] she's just too fat. She's just not cute
[41:48] enough." And you're like, "Wow, that's
[41:50] so politically incorrect." Deal with it.
[41:52] It's [ __ ] life.
[41:55] But the thing is is like your thoughts
[41:57] don't need to be politically correct.
[41:58] They're your thoughts. They're no one
[41:59] else's thoughts. And so whatever you
[42:00] have to do to get yourself there. And
[42:02] for me, the idea that a girl that I
[42:04] would want to be with would be like, I
[42:05] just don't think he's ambitious enough.
[42:06] I don't think he's successful enough.
[42:08] Like that those ideas killed me. And so
[42:10] I never wanted to be denied entry to
[42:12] somewhere because I didn't have these
[42:14] things. Now, do I believe that people
[42:17] should be denied entry? No. But I also
[42:18] realize that's the way the world is. And
[42:20] so you I think you can balance both
[42:21] beliefs. Like I'd love things to be
[42:22] different, but I accept the fact that
[42:24] they're not.
[42:24] >> Does this feel like a good argument for
[42:26] getting rid of other broke friends?
[42:27] Because I bet other broke friends reduce
[42:29] the pain of staying the same.
[42:30] >> A friend who supports you is someone who
[42:34] deliberately
[42:36] decreases the possibility of failure.
[42:40] And so if you look at your friends and
[42:43] you ask yourself, does this person
[42:45] increase or decrease the possibility of
[42:47] failure with my goal? It's very easy to
[42:49] answer that question. It's yes or no.
[42:51] It's increase or decrease. There's no in
[42:52] between. Do they increase or they
[42:53] decrease my possibility that I get to my
[42:55] goal? If the answer is decrease,
[42:59] then get rid of them. Because imagine
[43:01] that you have a 100% chance of hitting
[43:04] your goal and you have three friends
[43:05] that have a 30% decrease. Like you might
[43:08] now have a have a [ __ ] you know,
[43:10] whatever a third times three is,
[43:11] whatever. You have 27% chance of hitting
[43:13] your goal now because you have three
[43:14] terrible friends.
[43:15] >> Like negative experience.
[43:16] >> Yeah. Yeah. They're they're they're it's
[43:19] like getting in video games. It's like
[43:21] you've got somebody who's casting like a
[43:22] slow spell on you and you're like moving
[43:24] so slow and you're like weak and like
[43:26] all your all your hits have like half
[43:27] power. Like
[43:30] a lot of people need to shed
[43:33] friendships, but the thing is it's more
[43:34] that they call them friends, but they're
[43:36] not really friends. They're just there.
[43:39] And they're there because they've always
[43:40] been there, but not because they should
[43:42] be there, but because they're going to
[43:44] help you get to where you want to go.
[43:45] They just they're just there. They
[43:47] exist. They're not going anywhere. They
[43:49] don't have goals and they're at a
[43:51] different part in their journey. There's
[43:52] nothing wrong with that. But if you're
[43:53] going to start the path of of of
[43:56] drinking glass and starting to to to
[43:58] double time, you got to live your life
[43:59] and you got to live tomorrow's life and
[44:00] the next day's life and start dragging
[44:02] that towards you, they're going to
[44:05] they're going to be upset about it. And
[44:08] so one of the sayings I recently have
[44:10] that I like a lot which is there are no
[44:13] social obligations only social
[44:15] consequences.
[44:16] And the people who want to deliver those
[44:19] consequences often do it by talking to
[44:22] you less and by avoiding you more. They
[44:25] try to spend less time with you and talk
[44:27] to you less to punish you for the fact
[44:29] that you missed the party. You missed
[44:30] the going out. You didn't show up to
[44:31] their wedding. You didn't show up to
[44:32] their dogs christening or whatever.
[44:36] But the crazy thing is is that if you
[44:38] felt obligated to go, then it means you
[44:41] didn't want to go. And if it mean that
[44:44] means that if you didn't want to go and
[44:45] the punishment of not going is that you
[44:47] don't have to go more in the future
[44:48] because they avoid you. They don't
[44:49] invite you anymore. Then to me that's a
[44:51] win-win. You save time today and you
[44:54] save time tomorrow. And I don't
[44:55] understand why people are not willing to
[44:57] deal with that. Like just looking at
[44:58] what happens rather than whatever
[45:00] emotional noise they make with their
[45:01] face at you like moving past that.
[45:03] Great. You expelled air at me.
[45:05] Understood. Got it. But the outcome is
[45:07] you will no longer invite me, which is
[45:09] what I want. Great. I feel like we won
[45:12] here. And so thinking second and third
[45:16] order outcomes from what happens when I
[45:19] quote break up with this friend or what
[45:21] happens when I offend this friend. A lot
[45:23] of times it's you closer to your goal.
[45:26] And I've always been okay with that. And
[45:29] like if someone if someone like
[45:34] the moment I have seen somebody as
[45:36] decreasing the likelihood to hit my
[45:37] goal, I am happy to tell them that like
[45:41] I think I think you are not good for me.
[45:44] I don't think you help me hit what I
[45:45] want to hit. And they be like, well then
[45:47] they'll try and downgrade your goals and
[45:49] say you shouldn't believe this way. And
[45:50] then they'll cast their beliefs on you.
[45:52] And for me it's like that's amazing that
[45:54] you believe that. I don't believe that
[45:55] and I don't really want to believe what
[45:57] you believe because then I would have
[45:58] your life and I certainly don't want
[45:59] that. And so like again I I you I make
[46:03] these tweets about this but it's like if
[46:05] you don't like their life don't listen
[46:06] to what they say. Like don't take their
[46:08] advice if you don't like what you see.
[46:10] And so if everyone around you has a life
[46:14] you don't want then don't listen to any
[46:16] of their advice. Like, and hopefully
[46:18] you're listening to this and you're
[46:19] watching. If there's some element of my
[46:21] life or whatever that you find awesome,
[46:22] cool. Then maybe some element of what I
[46:24] can share is helpful for you. Um, but
[46:27] you have to put blinders on because
[46:28] there is a period of time where you, and
[46:30] I mean, I've said this, but you you're
[46:32] not going to be successful enough for
[46:33] the next tier of friends, but you're too
[46:35] different from the friends that you used
[46:36] to have. And so, that middle path is
[46:39] very lonely. But the good thing about
[46:41] loneliness is you've got time. And right
[46:42] now, time is what you need because you
[46:44] got to learn stuff. You got to get the
[46:45] skills so you can start trading that for
[46:46] more and more money. And then you can
[46:47] take the money and trade that for more
[46:49] money. But in the beginning, you just
[46:50] have time and that's what you have to
[46:52] spend. And so if you are broke or you
[46:55] are poor and wish to no longer be broken
[46:57] poor,
[47:00] the first is owning the fact that
[47:03] everything that has to do with your life
[47:04] is your fault.
[47:06] And a lot of people will reject that.
[47:08] And you're right. Stay poor. You're
[47:10] totally right. You'll never be
[47:11] successful. You're totally right. I
[47:14] believe you.
[47:16] The next step is being willing to use
[47:21] what you have rather than what you think
[47:22] you should have or what you wish you
[47:24] had. The circumstances, the connections,
[47:26] the money, whatever, the passion, the
[47:29] purpose, the meaning behind the work.
[47:32] You can wish for all that stuff, but you
[47:34] don't have it. So, you have to use what
[47:35] you have, which could be anger, could be
[47:37] shame, could be pain, whatever.
[47:41] And then
[47:43] as soon as you start taking action,
[47:45] everyone around you will collapse and
[47:48] try to pull you down. And so the only
[47:50] way to protect yourself against that is
[47:52] to increase
[47:54] your own approval of self and decrease
[47:58] how much their opinion of you matters.
[48:01] Which means that you have to be you have
[48:03] to be proud of you for taking the step
[48:06] and actively look at their lives and
[48:09] think do I want what they have? If the
[48:12] answer is no, then do not listen to what
[48:14] they say.
[48:17] And then when you do that, you keep
[48:20] walking. You keep taking steps
[48:22] no matter how painful it is. And you
[48:24] never stop.
[48:26] And if you do that, you will get there.
[48:30] That's it. Cool.
[48:33] >> In your 20s, you don't need to find
[48:34] yourself. You need to build yourself.
[48:36] Here are 18 tactical lessons I learned
[48:39] about achieving early success.
[48:40] >> I made my first million at 26. I crossed
[48:42] 100 million in net worth at age 31. And
[48:44] this is my road map for things that I
[48:45] learned along the way. I'd like to
[48:47] normalize a 6 day a week, 12-hour per
[48:51] day work week for men between 16 and 28.
[48:55] And despite all the self-worth voodoo
[48:58] that social media and society will tell
[49:00] you, you are valued based on your
[49:02] utility. And when you're young, you have
[49:05] none. But you have a lot of energy. And
[49:08] so trade that energy for experience
[49:09] points and become useful. The first rule
[49:12] of entrepreneurship according to Alex is
[49:14] use what you've got. And the reason I
[49:16] like that is because many people always
[49:18] don't start things because they don't
[49:21] have the capital. They don't have the
[49:22] connections. They don't have the
[49:24] whatever insert insecurity or projection
[49:27] of blame and power they want to put on.
[49:29] But the first rule is you use what you
[49:31] have. And so it's about resourcefulness,
[49:34] not resources. And so if you have
[49:36] energy, you use the resource you have.
[49:38] You use what you've got to trade to
[49:41] develop experience, to develop proof
[49:43] that you can get good at a skill. And
[49:45] you only get good at the skill by not
[49:46] being good at a skill and repeating it
[49:48] and then failing at each time and then
[49:50] making incremental improvements which
[49:51] take many many repetitions until you
[49:53] actually get good. And this may be a
[49:55] little controversial, but I'm not here
[49:57] to be nice to you. I'm trying to be
[49:59] kind, which might mean that it hurts a
[50:01] little bit. So, let's make this
[50:02] practical. If you have less than
[50:04] $100,000 in savings and you would like
[50:07] to have $100,000 or more in savings,
[50:09] these are the things that I would
[50:10] recommend doing. And that means that you
[50:11] have to check out your ego. It's your
[50:13] ego is gone for this. All right? You
[50:14] don't care what other people think
[50:15] because they're not going to be there in
[50:17] 10 years. All right? Because you have a
[50:18] whole new group of friends that are way
[50:19] [ __ ] better and cooler. So, one, stop
[50:21] eating out. Discount groceries only.
[50:23] That's if you're super poor. If here's
[50:26] my caveat, if you know how to make
[50:28] money, you already have a base level of
[50:30] skills, then eating Chipotle and
[50:32] whatever, whatever you can Door Dash it
[50:34] in so that you can keep working. The
[50:36] moment I realized I can make $500 every
[50:38] 30 minutes by selling, I was like, "Oh,
[50:40] I'm never buying I'm never cooking food
[50:42] or grocery shopping ever again."
[50:43] Anything that was less than $500 an hour
[50:46] was was now immediately outsourced. All
[50:48] right? But this advice is for people who
[50:51] are super broke. Okay? So, if you don't
[50:53] have the skill set yet at all and you're
[50:57] struggling to just get things going,
[50:59] then you need to be completely on the
[51:00] defensive so that you can have enough
[51:02] money so that you can start taking bets.
[51:04] Because the only way that you're going
[51:05] to get ahead is that you have to make
[51:07] bets. You got to make bets on education.
[51:09] You got to make bets on opportunities.
[51:10] You got to make bets on inventory. You
[51:11] got to make make bets on software. or
[51:13] you want to start a Shopify store, you
[51:14] want to start a school community, you
[51:16] want to start something, it's still
[51:17] going to cost some money, right? You
[51:19] might have to buy a camera, you have to
[51:20] buy some software that helps you edit
[51:21] videos, like there's some expenses. All
[51:23] right? And so having a big stockpile
[51:26] allows you to be patient. The the more
[51:28] money you have, the longer you out you
[51:30] can think because you don't have to
[51:31] worry about tomorrow. You know that next
[51:33] month and the month after and the month
[51:34] after taking care of because even if you
[51:35] made no money, you've got enough. That's
[51:37] how you can start thinking long term.
[51:38] People are like, "Think think long term.
[51:40] Think long term." But like unless if you
[51:41] have payroll and you've got or you've
[51:43] got rent or you've got you've got
[51:44] groceries to pay, you can't think long
[51:46] term because you're in survival mode.
[51:48] And so I'm trying to get survival to be
[51:50] as low as humanly possible for you so
[51:52] that you could get into thrive mode. But
[51:54] it's all relative. If you make 40 grand
[51:56] a month and spend 40 grand a month,
[51:57] you're going to be in the same survival
[51:58] mode. But if you make 40 grand a month
[52:00] and spend four, you're going to have
[52:01] you're going to have every month you
[52:03] make 10 months worth of income. And so
[52:05] in two months, you've got you've got 20
[52:07] months saved up. You're good. And then
[52:08] you can get super aggressive with that
[52:10] other 36 and start really betting to to
[52:12] double down. All right, so here's the
[52:15] very broke five, six things that you can
[52:18] do to immediately spend way less. One,
[52:21] stop eating out. Discount groceries
[52:22] only. Two, stop buying new clothes. Go
[52:24] to Goodwill only. Three, only attend
[52:27] free friend events. All right, so think
[52:29] of what I just said. Think about all the
[52:31] events that friends will tell you to
[52:32] come to. weddings, bachelor parties, uh
[52:35] birthdays, um just nights out because
[52:38] it's Thursday, whatever. Only attend
[52:41] free friend events. And if they don't
[52:43] support your goals, they are not your
[52:44] friends. Think about that. If I said,
[52:47] "Hey, I've got this goal." And I said,
[52:49] "Hey, there's this human being and he
[52:50] wants to get you to not have that goal.
[52:51] Would you describe them as a friend or
[52:52] an enemy?"
[52:54] Think about it. Some of you, some of the
[52:57] people in your life that you call
[52:58] friends are actually your enemies. You
[53:01] just don't know it.
[53:03] Now, four, take the rest of the time
[53:04] that you have to A, apply to jobs that
[53:07] make more than your current job. B, pick
[53:09] up side hustle work. C, learn skills
[53:12] that you can trade for a higher hourly
[53:14] rate than you currently do.
[53:17] When I say trade, I mean you make more
[53:18] per hour than what your current current
[53:20] skills pay you. All right? And then
[53:22] five, find the hardest worker in the
[53:24] room when you enter that new job or that
[53:26] new place and then double their level of
[53:29] input. So if they knock on a 100 doors,
[53:31] you knock on 200. They make a 100 dials,
[53:33] you make 200 dials, right? When I had
[53:35] Jacob, my young neighbor, I gave him
[53:37] this exact advice. And he was expected
[53:40] to on his team do a $100 a day. He did
[53:42] between 300 and 400. And so guess what?
[53:45] He got better faster. And then once you
[53:47] follow all of those steps, this is what
[53:49] you need to do next. Wait 36 months. And
[53:52] this is what I mean by patient with your
[53:54] outputs, impatient with your inputs. And
[53:57] the crazy thing is that you can change
[54:00] your life in one decision. I can get
[54:02] drunk, drive in a car, and change my
[54:04] life forever. Right? I can happen like
[54:06] that. But it can happen just like that
[54:08] the other way. It's just that the
[54:09] outcome's delayed. That's the only
[54:11] difference. You can change your life
[54:12] today in this moment by making these
[54:14] decisions and the and your life path
[54:17] will have veered. You will have changed
[54:19] direction. Your tree of of life will
[54:21] move. It's just that it takes time for
[54:23] that new direction to bear fruit.
[54:25] Whereas you can poison the fruit in a
[54:26] second. You can kill a tree real fast.
[54:28] You just can't grow one real fast. But
[54:30] it doesn't mean that if a seed's planted
[54:31] and you're watering it, it's not
[54:32] growing. It just takes a second to get
[54:34] above the surface. I think you can solve
[54:36] a lot of male problems by getting in
[54:38] shape and making money. You'll still
[54:40] have problems. They'll just be smaller
[54:43] and you'll have more resources to handle
[54:44] them. So, let's talk about the making
[54:46] money part first.
[54:48] Fundamentally, in order to make money,
[54:50] you have to provide value to some
[54:51] someone, either an employer or
[54:53] customers. But either way, you have
[54:55] utility which you exchange for money.
[54:57] And so by making that a goal, then it
[55:00] means that you're going to increase your
[55:02] own usefulness. And so somebody who is
[55:05] more useful all of a sudden develops
[55:07] other ancillary skills around that
[55:09] utility that they can use in other parts
[55:11] of their lives. If you're good at sales,
[55:12] guess what you can do when you're
[55:14] talking to girls? You can use the same
[55:16] conversational skill set. If you're
[55:18] trying to negotiate uh a purchase for a
[55:20] car or a house or whatever, like those
[55:23] skills generalize. They transfer across
[55:26] domains. And so a lot of people think
[55:27] it's like, well, when would I ever be a
[55:29] salesperson or when would I ever be a
[55:31] outbound what like it doesn't matter.
[55:33] It's not about that thing. The thing is
[55:35] it's like real life skills actually do
[55:37] generalize. Like this isn't elementary
[55:39] school or or middle school when you're
[55:41] learning calculus or algebra or whatever
[55:43] and thinking like what am I going to use
[55:44] this in real life? One, it is real life
[55:46] right now. Two,
[55:48] these skills do get used across domains.
[55:52] Of all of my friends who are sent to
[55:53] millionaires and billionaires to a
[55:55] person, they started in what I would
[55:58] consider a high volume sales
[56:01] environment. So that's either
[56:03] door-nocking, cold calling, or some sort
[56:07] of in-person business where they had
[56:09] many, many, many conversations with
[56:11] strangers on a daily basis. And I think
[56:13] there, and I'm talking not like a a a
[56:16] month or six months. I'm talking like
[56:18] three, five years where no one knew
[56:20] their name. They were just some faceless
[56:22] representative that stood there at the
[56:25] door, saw people, sold memberships, sold
[56:28] insurance, sold solar, sold whatever.
[56:32] And the thing is is like skill
[56:34] development happens through volume and
[56:36] feedback loops. So it's the number of
[56:38] repetitions you have times the amount of
[56:40] improvement between repetitions. Brute
[56:42] forcing the amount of volume definitely
[56:44] will help if you can give yourself
[56:45] feedback. I've seen people say, "Hey,
[56:47] I've actually made a hundred pieces of
[56:49] content." Now, this is like 1% of people
[56:50] because most people do nothing. But of
[56:53] the 1% of people who say, "Okay, I post
[56:55] it every day for a year." The thing is
[56:56] is they didn't do the most important
[56:58] part, which is you don't just like make
[57:00] a video and post it and just every day
[57:01] like, "Hey, make a video, post it, make
[57:03] a video, post it." You have to look at
[57:04] what you did and what you could do
[57:06] better. Fundamentally, that is the the
[57:08] cornerstone of feedback. And so you look
[57:10] at the top 10 videos you made over the
[57:12] last month and you say, "Okay, how do I
[57:14] do more of that and how do I do less of
[57:15] the bottom 10%." And you just pick one
[57:17] thing that you did well there and you
[57:18] try and do it in every video going
[57:20] forward. And that develops a checklist
[57:22] of things to do so that you develop a
[57:24] skill. And so speaking from my own
[57:26] experience, the first sales conversation
[57:28] I ever had, first off, I had zero sales
[57:30] training. No one was like, "Hey, this is
[57:32] the script. This is how you go over."
[57:33] They're like, "Hey, here's a new lady.
[57:36] Go sign her up." And so I was like,
[57:39] "Okay." And I didn't even know this was
[57:41] a sale. I didn't know the I didn't know
[57:42] the term sales. I just he said, "Go sign
[57:45] her up." And I said, "Okay." And so I
[57:47] walked over and I and she was like,
[57:49] "Hey, you know, I want to know more
[57:50] about the gym." And I said, "Well, what
[57:52] do you want to know?" [laughter]
[57:54] And she was like, "Well, I mean, like,
[57:56] how much is it?" And I was like, "Oh,
[57:58] it's uh whatever, 150 bucks a month."
[58:00] And she was like, "Okay." And I was
[58:02] like, "You want to sign up?" And she
[58:04] said, "I left my credit card at home."
[58:07] And I was like, "Okay." And she was
[58:08] like, "I'll be back with the credit
[58:10] card." And I was like, "Cool." And so I
[58:12] walked out and uh it was like 2 minutes,
[58:14] right? And I walked out and the owner
[58:17] Sam was there with a few of other other
[58:18] gym owners. He had bought a few gym
[58:20] owners in. So it was like three or four
[58:21] gym owners there. And [snorts] uh he was
[58:23] like, "Damn." He was like, "That was
[58:25] fast." And I was like, "Yeah." And he's
[58:26] like, "You closed her?" And I was like,
[58:27] "Yeah." And and he was like, "With a
[58:30] credit card?" And I was like, "Oh, no.
[58:33] She's she's going to go get it and
[58:34] she'll be back." And they just looked at
[58:36] each other and then looked back at me
[58:38] and then just started laughing at me
[58:40] uncontrollably, like couldn't breathe at
[58:42] how dumb what I had just said was. And
[58:44] the thing is is I had no experience. And
[58:46] I and I tell that story because so many
[58:49] people assume that like I walked out of
[58:51] the womb closing deals, you know what I
[58:53] mean? Like, hey nurse, what are you
[58:54] doing later? You know what I mean? Like,
[58:56] [laughter]
[58:58] but it wasn't like that, right? Like I
[59:00] didn't know I I didn't I didn't even
[59:02] know the term. And so, you know, over
[59:05] time, I just started developing like,
[59:06] okay, well, what do you do? And I
[59:08] watched other people. So, I was like,
[59:09] okay, they start with asking them why
[59:10] someone's there. Ask them about their
[59:12] goals, ask them things that they've done
[59:13] in the past that didn't work. I like,
[59:14] okay, that that that seems to work.
[59:16] Okay. And then when they ask them to
[59:18] buy, then if they don't want to say yes,
[59:20] they ask them more questions rather than
[59:22] just saying, okay. So, I started to
[59:23] develop at least an understanding of the
[59:25] framework of how sales occurred. But I
[59:26] still wasn't good, right? And so then I
[59:29] went through like that rocky cut scene
[59:30] period where this is where I'm very
[59:32] grateful for this is that uh Facebook
[59:34] ads is when I started running them in
[59:35] 2013 were super cheap. And so it
[59:38] actually gave me so many repetitions cuz
[59:42] not only was I taking 15 to 20 consults
[59:45] a day in person, I was also working
[59:47] leads. And so I'm talking to strangers
[59:48] over the phone to set the appointments.
[59:50] And so all I got was just names on a
[59:51] list and I would call them set the
[59:53] appointment like who's this again? You
[59:55] know, all of that. Um, and then, and by
[59:58] the way, if you are local, um, you just
[01:00:00] say the name pause with a question mark
[01:00:02] at the beginning. You're like, "John."
[01:00:04] And then they'll be like, "Yeah." You're
[01:00:06] like, "This is Alex." I'd pause and
[01:00:08] they'd be like, they're like, "Who the
[01:00:10] [ __ ] is Alex?" I'd be like, "From
[01:00:12] Facebook. You signed up for blah blah
[01:00:14] blah blah blah our thing." Yeah. I'm
[01:00:16] just calling to make sure that you're
[01:00:18] not a crazy person from the internet.
[01:00:19] And neither am I. I was like, "We're
[01:00:20] actually on the corner of X and Y." I
[01:00:23] was like, "Right next to the 7-Eleven."
[01:00:24] They're like, "Yeah." I'm like, "Okay,
[01:00:25] cool. I just wanted to see what time you
[01:00:27] want to come come by. I was like, we
[01:00:28] have the sweetest facility in the world.
[01:00:30] Not really, but it's uh at least pretty
[01:00:31] decent for this area, but we have five
[01:00:33] out of five coolness. And they were just
[01:00:35] laughing. They be like, I can make it at
[01:00:37] six. And I'm like, six works. I was
[01:00:38] like, do you want a picture of me or
[01:00:40] just of the address? And they're like,
[01:00:41] just the address? I'm like, all right,
[01:00:43] sounds good. I'll text it to you and
[01:00:44] I'll see you later today. Right. So that
[01:00:46] kind like notice the like half giggles
[01:00:48] between each word. like it's it's
[01:00:50] showing that you're a positive tone
[01:00:52] person, high energy, and someone's like,
[01:00:54] "Man, this guy seems cool or this gal
[01:00:56] seems cool, right?" And so they're more
[01:00:58] likely to show up. They're more likely
[01:00:59] now if I maintain that tone. If they
[01:01:02] give me an objection, I can pivot really
[01:01:04] easily. If I'm like neutral or like,
[01:01:06] "Hi, I saw that you signed up on the
[01:01:07] internet for our thing. Uh, would you
[01:01:09] like to come in?" They're like, "Uh,
[01:01:11] well, tell me more about it." Like,
[01:01:12] well, it's just you have no you have no
[01:01:14] room for messing up. And so I always
[01:01:17] tried to have more rapport and bring a
[01:01:20] lot of energy. And the thing is is like
[01:01:21] if you've seen any of my content, I'm
[01:01:23] not naturally like a high energy person.
[01:01:25] Um I will continue to work, which is
[01:01:27] different than being like up here. And
[01:01:30] so I developed a lot of things to try
[01:01:31] and keep myself energized. And so I had
[01:01:35] a small trampoline that I would bounce
[01:01:37] on uh before and between every sales
[01:01:40] appointment. It sounds ridiculous, but
[01:01:42] if you I'm telling it's it's like a
[01:01:44] hundred bucks if you buy one of those
[01:01:45] little trampolines and you bounce either
[01:01:47] between sales calls or between people
[01:01:50] like I'd have people coming in as I was
[01:01:52] still bouncing and I'd be like I know
[01:01:53] this is ridiculous. I was like but try
[01:01:55] and be in a bad mood on a trampoline.
[01:01:57] You can't do it. You can't do it. You
[01:01:59] can't do it. And I challenge you too.
[01:02:00] You can be in a bad mood if you try
[01:02:01] jumping around like you feel like such a
[01:02:03] child. It's ridiculous. But what would
[01:02:05] happen is like I would rel I would also
[01:02:06] get a little bit exercise. My blood
[01:02:07] would keep moving. But it's also just
[01:02:09] like mentally um literally bouncing
[01:02:13] gave me a lot of energy for these
[01:02:14] appointments. And so I say this because
[01:02:17] I developed all of these things over
[01:02:18] time. And so if you're starting out,
[01:02:21] you're not going to be good. That's why
[01:02:24] you're new. You have no experience. But
[01:02:26] there's a difference between there's a
[01:02:28] story that um shoot I can't remember
[01:02:30] where it is, but there was a foreign kid
[01:02:32] who had never seen a banana before. And
[01:02:35] so the adult gave the kid a banana and
[01:02:39] so the banana so the kid took the banana
[01:02:41] and then bit right into it with the skin
[01:02:43] and everything and another child was
[01:02:46] like you're such an idiot and then the
[01:02:48] adult yelled at that child and said no
[01:02:51] he just doesn't know any better and
[01:02:53] there's a very big difference between
[01:02:54] being dumb and being inexperienced right
[01:02:57] now you just don't have reps and so
[01:03:00] you're going to make a lot of mistakes
[01:03:01] like biting into the banana like at for
[01:03:03] just walking letting someone walk away
[01:03:04] assuming it's a close and they say that
[01:03:06] they're just going to come back and call
[01:03:07] you with their credit card, right? By
[01:03:09] the way, that never happens. Um, very
[01:03:11] rarely, but instead, uh, you want to
[01:03:15] just peel that banana. You want to bite
[01:03:16] into the banana, bite into the orange,
[01:03:18] all of those mistakes as quickly as
[01:03:21] possible and not judge yourself for
[01:03:23] making the mistake and see the mistake
[01:03:25] as part of the process of being like
[01:03:27] that didn't work, that didn't work. And
[01:03:29] if I develop enough of these doesn't
[01:03:30] works, then you just kind of walk the
[01:03:32] the minefield and you get to where
[01:03:35] you're trying to go and people are like,
[01:03:36] "Wow, you're so good at this." And
[01:03:36] you're like, "Oh, no, no, I actually
[01:03:38] just know all the things not to say in a
[01:03:40] sale." And then they end up buying. I
[01:03:42] just avoid all that and then they buy.
[01:03:44] And to be clear, I think I have a
[01:03:46] similar piece of advice, but for very
[01:03:48] different reasons of telling young men
[01:03:50] in general or men to work harder. And
[01:03:53] it's not because I think it's some sort
[01:03:55] of, you know, beating your chest, I'm an
[01:03:58] alpha, whatever thing. It's just that
[01:04:00] for me, the point of my life is to
[01:04:02] become the best version of me. And in
[01:04:04] order to do that, I need to learn
[01:04:05] because there's a huge discrepancy
[01:04:06] between where I am and where I want to
[01:04:07] go. And the discrepancy is going to get
[01:04:10] filled with skills, which means that I
[01:04:12] need to do repetitions to acquire
[01:04:15] failures that I can learn from, to get
[01:04:18] better from. And if I can do more of
[01:04:22] that in a shorter period of time, I will
[01:04:24] learn more skills and by definition, I
[01:04:26] will shrink the distance between myself
[01:04:28] and my ideal self. And so that is pretty
[01:04:31] much the only thought process I have
[01:04:34] around this. And I also believe that you
[01:04:37] need to be patient with outputs and
[01:04:40] impatient with inputs. So let me unpack
[01:04:43] that. Patience in general is figuring
[01:04:46] out what to do in the meantime. So when
[01:04:48] someone says, "Hey, be patient," what
[01:04:49] they just mean is figure out something
[01:04:50] else to do in the meantime. And so if
[01:04:52] I'm telling you to be patient with
[01:04:54] outputs, it means that you basically
[01:04:55] just have to figure out something else
[01:04:56] to do in the meantime while you wait for
[01:04:59] outputs to occur because you can't
[01:05:00] output. You can't money doesn't appear.
[01:05:03] You have to do something and then money
[01:05:04] happens, right? But the doing something
[01:05:06] part is the thing that you can control.
[01:05:08] The money happening is the part that you
[01:05:10] don't control that comes afterwards.
[01:05:11] It's an outcome, right? And so when I
[01:05:14] say patient with outputs, that's the
[01:05:17] first part. The second part is impatient
[01:05:19] with inputs. And so if being patient is
[01:05:21] figuring out what to do in the meantime,
[01:05:23] impatience is doing the thing in the
[01:05:25] meantime, right? And so it's the
[01:05:28] opposite of that. It's the thing you do
[01:05:29] in the meantime. And so if you want to
[01:05:31] be impatient with the input, the input
[01:05:33] is the thing. That's the action you do.
[01:05:35] And so by delineating that, if you hear
[01:05:39] yourself thinking, man, why hasn't this
[01:05:40] happened yet? You're talking about
[01:05:42] outputs. And that means great, if I
[01:05:44] think that thought, I need to do more of
[01:05:46] this input, right? And so use your
[01:05:48] input, your action, your doingness, the
[01:05:51] thing you use your hands for as your
[01:05:55] coping mechanism for your impatience
[01:05:59] with outputs. I want to say that one
[01:06:01] more time. Whenever you have that
[01:06:03] feeling that things should be happening
[01:06:04] faster, use action as your coping
[01:06:08] mechanism. I used to write this down a
[01:06:11] lot uh and say it, which was action
[01:06:14] alleviates anxiety. And so when I would
[01:06:16] have this anxiety about the future of
[01:06:18] like why haven't I made it yet? Why are
[01:06:20] these other people doing better than me?
[01:06:21] Like is is this not going to work? What
[01:06:24] if I'm on the wrong path? Action
[01:06:26] alleviates anxiety. The only thing I
[01:06:28] could control with that I was is that I
[01:06:29] would work is that I would get better.
[01:06:30] And the key point there was that it
[01:06:32] wasn't just working for work's sake. It
[01:06:34] was working with the intention to
[01:06:35] improve. And so you want to do
[01:06:38] repetitions because by doing things more
[01:06:40] times you get better at them typically
[01:06:42] just by accident. But if you're
[01:06:44] deliberate about the point of doing
[01:06:46] this, when I started working at a gym,
[01:06:48] going from a white collar job, it wasn't
[01:06:50] because I wanted to become a trainer for
[01:06:52] the rest of my life. It was because I
[01:06:53] wanted to learn the skills.
[01:06:56] And then I knew that once I learned
[01:06:57] those skills, if I owned a gym, then I
[01:06:59] would know how to do the training part
[01:07:01] as well. And that would be good for me.
[01:07:03] And so then when I was a gym owner and
[01:07:05] when I started and started working at a
[01:07:06] gym, I wanted to own a big chain of
[01:07:08] gyms. That was my that was my whole goal
[01:07:10] to start with. I wasn't getting into
[01:07:11] this for one. Like I never had the goal
[01:07:13] of only owning just one gym. And so even
[01:07:15] when I started that gym, the whole point
[01:07:17] and I worked all the time because I
[01:07:18] thought of all the things that I didn't
[01:07:19] know how to do yet. And so it wasn't
[01:07:22] about great, I've made it. I own a gym.
[01:07:24] It was like I'm so deprived of where I
[01:07:26] want to be. I have I have to fill this
[01:07:28] gap as fast as I possibly can. And so
[01:07:30] that's why I spent so much time on this
[01:07:32] and got feedback from as many human
[01:07:35] beings as I possibly could who were
[01:07:37] ahead of me. So, I want to say this
[01:07:39] clearly. Once I started my gym one, I
[01:07:42] paid for a mastermind for gym owners
[01:07:44] before owning a gym. And I did that
[01:07:46] because I figured, well, why would I
[01:07:48] start a gym until I learn all the stuff
[01:07:49] that you guys did wrong? I was like,
[01:07:51] I'll just learn from all y'all's
[01:07:52] mistakes. It sounds like a great deal
[01:07:54] for me. It almost felt unfair. I was
[01:07:56] like, "Yeah, okay." He said, "Don't
[01:07:58] start at one of those locations." He
[01:07:59] said, "Have good storefront." He said,
[01:08:00] "Make sure that you have, you know, good
[01:08:02] parking." I was, "Oo, these are all
[01:08:03] good, you know, good things." They're
[01:08:04] like, "Don't go too big." I was like,
[01:08:05] "Okay, that's good." and they're like,
[01:08:06] "Make sure your rent's under this per
[01:08:08] foot." I was like, "All right, make sure
[01:08:08] I got that right." And so, I took all
[01:08:10] these notes in that I would have just
[01:08:11] made huge mistakes on the on the
[01:08:13] upfront. Now, once I did start my gym,
[01:08:15] what a lot of people don't know is that
[01:08:17] every weekend I would either be on phone
[01:08:20] calls or I'd be driving out to other gym
[01:08:22] owners and I would, and thankfully,
[01:08:24] because I was so young when I started my
[01:08:25] business, they were just like, they felt
[01:08:27] bad for me. And so, they would just sit
[01:08:29] there and I'd be like, "Hey, why do you
[01:08:31] do that? Hey, why do you do that? Hey,
[01:08:32] why do you do that?" And it was like,
[01:08:34] you know, they'd be like, "God, you're
[01:08:36] such a pain in the ass." [laughter]
[01:08:38] But I just wanted to learn, right? But I
[01:08:39] was always like willing to help them
[01:08:40] with anything they had. You know what I
[01:08:41] mean? I was like, "Let me show you the
[01:08:42] stuff that's working well for me." And I
[01:08:43] would always just share it. Um, and the
[01:08:45] thing is is I would go there and they
[01:08:47] would say they did something and I'd be
[01:08:48] like, "Huh, that's weird. That's
[01:08:49] different than the other guy." And I I
[01:08:50] like that way better. It didn't mean I'd
[01:08:52] take everything as as fact. But I got a
[01:08:54] lot of ideas from that. And then I would
[01:08:55] use them. And if they didn't work, I
[01:08:57] would just toss them out. And if they
[01:08:58] did, I kept it. And that's how I quickly
[01:09:01] iterated the gym model to become much
[01:09:03] better than a lot of people's models
[01:09:05] despite me being younger because I was
[01:09:07] able to leverage everyone else's
[01:09:09] experience as fast as I could and gym it
[01:09:11] into my own. And so I think like the
[01:09:13] people who move faster than life learn
[01:09:15] faster and the only way you learn is by
[01:09:18] changing your behavior with the same
[01:09:20] conditions. Which means that if a person
[01:09:22] walks in I say this is my six-point
[01:09:24] script. A person who's identical walks
[01:09:26] in right afterwards. If I've learned
[01:09:28] something, that script changes means
[01:09:30] same condition, new behavior. And so if
[01:09:33] you keep doing the exact same thing
[01:09:35] every single day, then you may not be
[01:09:37] learning. And this is a key point. It's
[01:09:39] good to work hard, but it's good to work
[01:09:41] hard and smart, which means that the
[01:09:43] work you do gets better because you
[01:09:45] tweak things. And so if you're not
[01:09:47] documenting the process that you have,
[01:09:48] and I'm not saying you're making content
[01:09:50] about it, but literally looking back at
[01:09:51] game footage, looking at the calls you
[01:09:53] did, looking at the content you did. I
[01:09:55] do this today. People ask me like, "What
[01:09:57] are the masterminds you're into? What
[01:09:58] are the courses you learn from?" I have
[01:10:01] now broken apart the learning process
[01:10:04] that I have that works best for me
[01:10:05] because I see the biggest gains and
[01:10:07] improvement haven't come from advice for
[01:10:09] me for the most part. They came from
[01:10:10] looking at data, which was, let me look
[01:10:13] at the last 2,000 ads I made. Let me
[01:10:15] look at the top 50. Let me look at what
[01:10:17] these ones have in common. Let me look
[01:10:18] at what they don't look like compared to
[01:10:20] the bottom 50. Okay, these ones have
[01:10:22] these characteristics. These don't. I'll
[01:10:24] do more of this and less of that. And
[01:10:25] then I do another hundred ads and I look
[01:10:27] at the top 10 again. I say, "What do
[01:10:28] these ones have that these ones don't?"
[01:10:29] And I do that for sales calls. I do that
[01:10:31] for content. I do that for meetings. I
[01:10:32] do that for for businesses in general
[01:10:35] when you start zooming out. And so that
[01:10:38] process of do a lot of volume. Then look
[01:10:42] at the outcomes that were good. Look at
[01:10:44] the activities that led to those
[01:10:45] outcomes that are positive. Do more of
[01:10:48] those activities. Look at the bottom
[01:10:50] percentages. Look at the things that led
[01:10:52] to not having that happen. and do less
[01:10:54] of those. And if you're younger, and
[01:10:57] this is specific for everyone who's
[01:10:58] listening to this video, if you're
[01:10:59] probably sub 30, sub 28 maybe, right? If
[01:11:02] you're in your 20s or less, you can
[01:11:04] probably get away with this, which is
[01:11:06] that people ahead of you are more
[01:11:09] willing, believe it or not, to feel like
[01:11:11] they have status. So, you can give them
[01:11:14] status by saying, "Be a mentor." And the
[01:11:17] thing is, a lot of young guys have a lot
[01:11:18] of ego, right? Because you're trying to
[01:11:19] prove yourself, trying to be a man,
[01:11:20] whatever. The thing is is that if you
[01:11:23] humble yourself, it's not like there's
[01:11:25] some [ __ ] massive scoreboard where
[01:11:27] it's like who humbled themselves to whom
[01:11:29] across the whole US. It doesn't it's not
[01:11:31] not exists. It's just it's within one
[01:11:33] dynamic, right? And so if you go and
[01:11:35] say, "Hey, I don't know anything. I'm
[01:11:37] happy to learn." If you do that, then a
[01:11:39] lot of people are like, "Oh, well, he
[01:11:40] humbled himself." Well, yeah, I'm happy
[01:11:42] to teach you. And the thing is is
[01:11:43] they'll give you advice that's worth
[01:11:44] thousands of dollars, years of your life
[01:11:47] for free if you just say, "You're better
[01:11:49] than I am at this." But the thing is is
[01:11:51] at the end of the day none of it matters
[01:11:53] but scoreboard would be the thing that
[01:11:56] matters in business right and so the
[01:11:58] only thing that precedes the scoreboard
[01:12:01] is your learning I've spent ego points
[01:12:04] I've spent dollars I've spent time I've
[01:12:08] spent social capital I spent every
[01:12:10] resource that I had to get more learning
[01:12:13] faster because fundamentally the only
[01:12:16] thing and I think this is probably one
[01:12:17] of the biggest gifts my father gave me
[01:12:19] is believing that I am the asset I am
[01:12:22] investing in. And the cool thing is is
[01:12:24] like you are the permanent hold, right?
[01:12:27] You can't sell you like you're you until
[01:12:30] you die. And so this is the one asset
[01:12:32] you've got because you compound. Skills
[01:12:34] compound. When you get really good at
[01:12:36] sales and really good at finance, guess
[01:12:37] what? You can raise a billion dollars
[01:12:38] because you know how the finance world
[01:12:40] works and you know how the sales world
[01:12:42] works, right? If you know how to you
[01:12:43] know how to code and market, then guess
[01:12:46] what? You can build software and sell it
[01:12:47] to gazillions of people because you have
[01:12:48] the product and the acquisition. Like
[01:12:51] skills stack disproportionately. If you
[01:12:53] only know one, you might not be able to
[01:12:54] make a tenth as much as if you know two.
[01:12:57] Now, obviously those are big bucketed
[01:12:58] terms that have many, many, many skills
[01:12:59] underneath of them. But fundamentally,
[01:13:01] when you think about it that way, you
[01:13:02] become a weapon. Real quick, I have a
[01:13:04] gift for you. This is the $100 million
[01:13:06] scaling road map. It's something that my
[01:13:07] team and I put 200 plus hours into
[01:13:09] building and breaking the stages of
[01:13:11] scaling into 10 steps. All right? All
[01:13:13] right. And so what we did is we broke
[01:13:14] down everything that got us basically
[01:13:16] got us stuck and what we did to break
[01:13:17] free at each level of the business. And
[01:13:20] if you'd like to know what product,
[01:13:21] marketing, sales, customer service, IT,
[01:13:23] recruiting, human uh resources, and
[01:13:25] finance look like at the stage that
[01:13:27] you're currently at, this is a free
[01:13:29] gift. So all you have to do is go to
[01:13:30] aquis.com/romap. You can plug in your
[01:13:32] business information. And if you want
[01:13:33] our help, you want my help to help you
[01:13:36] break through whatever level of scaling
[01:13:37] you're at. This is not a promise. I'm
[01:13:38] just saying we'd love to help. Um on the
[01:13:40] thank you page, you can book a call. Uh,
[01:13:42] every month we have a workshop out here
[01:13:43] at my headquarters. You actually talk to
[01:13:45] my real team that does does our
[01:13:47] marketing, does our emails, does our
[01:13:48] ads, does our copy, does our does our
[01:13:50] does our sales, does our finance, does
[01:13:52] our recruiting, the real people are
[01:13:53] doing this at a very high level. And
[01:13:55] what's really cool about that is that
[01:13:56] they can typically find and spot what
[01:13:58] the constraints are in a business like
[01:13:59] that. And so it's one of the most
[01:14:01] valuable things that I could possibly
[01:14:02] do. Obviously, you know, space is
[01:14:03] limited based on our actual
[01:14:04] headquarters. Um, but if that's
[01:14:05] interesting on the thank you page, you
[01:14:06] can book a call. No pressure. This is a
[01:14:08] gift either way. It's absolutely free.
[01:14:09] So, let's tackle the second part. I said
[01:14:11] you can solve a lot of male problems by
[01:14:13] getting in shape and making money. And
[01:14:15] so let's talk about the getting in shape
[01:14:17] side. So you can avoid tons of problems
[01:14:21] in life by doing one thing, going to bed
[01:14:24] on time. And so instead of setting
[01:14:27] alarms to wake up, set alarms to go to
[01:14:29] sleep on time. It's hard to wake up late
[01:14:31] when you go to bed at 9, right? And so
[01:14:33] the thing is is that that one simple
[01:14:35] behavior actually can eliminate a lot of
[01:14:37] the things that derail men, especially
[01:14:39] young men. And so Charlie Mer talks
[01:14:41] about this a lot, which is like all I'd
[01:14:43] want to do is find out where I'm going
[01:14:44] to die and never go there. The whole
[01:14:47] point is he thought so much more about
[01:14:50] avoiding stupidity than trying to be
[01:14:52] intelligent. It's kind of like the
[01:14:53] stupidities are very easy to identify.
[01:14:55] The intelligence is hard, but if you
[01:14:57] avoid all stupidity, you just become
[01:14:59] intelligent by default. And so if you
[01:15:02] define intelligence the way I do, which
[01:15:03] is rate of learning, so how quickly you
[01:15:05] pick things up, that is intelligence. If
[01:15:07] you can avoid all of these things that
[01:15:10] make you look like an idiot, [laughter]
[01:15:12] right? Then you become more intelligent.
[01:15:14] And so let's let's talk about this from
[01:15:16] the from the the getting in shape
[01:15:17] perspective. Show [snorts] me a
[01:15:19] situation where you have two groups of
[01:15:21] men. One group of men that is really out
[01:15:23] of shape and fat and another group of
[01:15:25] men that's really in shape that are
[01:15:27] going to outperform one another. And
[01:15:30] this is generalized. You have to take
[01:15:31] random sampling of the population. A
[01:15:32] bunch of inshaped guys, a bunch of
[01:15:34] overweight guys. Who's going to do
[01:15:36] better at any task over and over again?
[01:15:37] If we pick 10 tasks that are completely
[01:15:39] different, the inshaped guys are going
[01:15:41] to do better than the out of shape guys.
[01:15:42] Period. They're going to have more
[01:15:43] energy. They're going to be more
[01:15:44] focused. If it's anything interrelated,
[01:15:46] like inter relations based, like those
[01:15:48] guys are going to close higher
[01:15:49] percentages. If you're better looking,
[01:15:51] you will close more. If you're better
[01:15:53] looking, you get paid more. If you're
[01:15:55] better looking, you get more promoted.
[01:15:57] If you're better looking, you do better
[01:15:59] in content. Period. Fight me. And so the
[01:16:03] thing is is like if you have this one
[01:16:05] thing that affects every way that people
[01:16:07] see you and the only thing you have to
[01:16:09] do is control what you put into your
[01:16:11] mouth, then don't you think it's worth
[01:16:13] developing that most basic skill of
[01:16:15] discipline at this point in your life?
[01:16:17] Because the thing is is that you want to
[01:16:19] get in shape young because if you're not
[01:16:21] in shape, guess whose fault that is?
[01:16:25] So get in shape now. Thing is is it
[01:16:28] costs time, not money. And right now
[01:16:31] you've got time and not money. And time
[01:16:34] only becomes more expensive as you age.
[01:16:38] So buy it now while time cost you the
[01:16:40] least and you have the fewest
[01:16:42] responsibilities. It'll help you no
[01:16:44] matter what life path you choose. The
[01:16:46] thing that no one recognizes is that
[01:16:48] drinking cost you two days. The day you
[01:16:50] drink and the day you recover. and
[01:16:51] sometimes the weeks afterwards for the
[01:16:53] stupid thing you did while you were
[01:16:54] drunk that everyone else saw. It reminds
[01:16:56] me of this quote from Muhammad Ali and I
[01:16:59] asked my team to pull it up cuz I think
[01:17:00] it's so good also cuz he was the
[01:17:01] greatest of all time and just a cool
[01:17:03] dude.
[01:17:03] >> What's the the central part of your
[01:17:05] training? Is it running? Is it sparring
[01:17:07] or
[01:17:08] >> central part is [music]
[01:17:10] dodging the nightclubs and the parties
[01:17:12] and the girls?
[01:17:15] >> You want the truth? and being in the bed
[01:17:18] by yourself 9:00 at night.
[01:17:22] >> And [music] if you can get by that,
[01:17:23] you'll make it.
[01:17:26] >> That's the truth. Now, I tell you the
[01:17:27] truth. You talk all that running and
[01:17:29] [music] hitting the bags and jogging and
[01:17:30] biting them. You won't
[01:17:32] >> dodging ladies is the main thing.
[01:17:35] >> Especially when you're pretty like me.
[01:17:37] >> And I'll speak to myself personally.
[01:17:39] When I had my intense periods of work, I
[01:17:43] would take off for a long, long time. So
[01:17:46] the longest I took off was two years
[01:17:48] while I was scaling gym launch from, you
[01:17:50] know, the 20 months we went from zero to
[01:17:51] 4 and a.5 million a month, 4.4 to be
[01:17:54] technical. I didn't drink that whole
[01:17:55] period. And once things settled out, I
[01:17:57] was like, "All right, I'm willing to
[01:17:58] drink again." And right now,
[01:18:00] Acquisition.com is scaling like crazy.
[01:18:02] And so Leila and I both said, "Let's
[01:18:04] just stop drinking for the foreseeable."
[01:18:06] And same thing now. So that was when I
[01:18:08] was in my 20s. This is now when I'm in
[01:18:10] my 30s. And I'll probably continue this
[01:18:12] until I feel like I'm at a place where
[01:18:14] things feel chill again. and then like
[01:18:15] maybe I'll I'll partake again. But the
[01:18:17] thing is is like if you're hungry, argue
[01:18:19] me the opposite, which is me drinking
[01:18:22] more will make it more likely for me to
[01:18:23] hit my goals. I think you'd have a tough
[01:18:25] time making that argument. And so right
[01:18:27] now everything's compounding is
[01:18:29] amplified, right? The stuff you do now
[01:18:31] amplifies throughout your career and
[01:18:32] your life. And so I would want to stack
[01:18:36] as many advantages as I can to my
[01:18:38] favorite, which is like I'm going to go
[01:18:40] to sleep on time. I'm going to not
[01:18:42] drink, right? I'm going to get in shape,
[01:18:46] right? I'm going to do as many
[01:18:47] repetitions as I can. I'm going to
[01:18:48] humble myself with people who are more
[01:18:50] experienced than I am. Even if I think
[01:18:51] I'm smarter than them, they still know
[01:18:54] more. And there's a big difference, and
[01:18:55] this is what I think is really tough for
[01:18:57] younger guys, is that your brain at 25
[01:19:00] to, you know, like 25ish, 25 to 30 is
[01:19:03] like peak processing power. But I'm way
[01:19:07] [ __ ] smarter now than I was then
[01:19:09] because I've still learned more. And
[01:19:11] that's the thing is is that you may be
[01:19:13] smarter than someone in sheer processing
[01:19:15] power, but they still might know more
[01:19:17] than you. And so you can't live their
[01:19:20] life. And especially if somebody is
[01:19:21] further ahead, then they it still means
[01:19:23] that they have knowledge that you don't.
[01:19:26] And so listen and humbling yourself to
[01:19:29] somebody even if you think you are
[01:19:31] smarter will teach you more because
[01:19:33] again argue the opposite. I will learn
[01:19:36] nothing from no one. How does that help
[01:19:39] you? It helps you your ego feel good,
[01:19:42] but at some point your ego is going to
[01:19:43] have to rectify its good feeling with
[01:19:45] reality, which is that you're broke as
[01:19:46] [ __ ] and no one cares. And so, I would
[01:19:49] rather humble myself rather than have
[01:19:52] the world humble me. This is a Bible
[01:19:54] quote that I just really like a lot.
[01:19:55] It's Matthew 23:12. He said, "Those who
[01:19:56] are humble will be exalted, and whoever
[01:19:59] exalts himself will be humbled." I
[01:20:00] actually told that to one of our our
[01:20:02] team the other day because I felt like
[01:20:03] his ego was getting a little bit bigger
[01:20:05] than it probably should have been. And I
[01:20:06] said, "Listen, man." I was like, "If you
[01:20:08] want to get humbled, keep doing what
[01:20:09] you're doing." I was like, "But if you
[01:20:11] want people to talk you up," I was like,
[01:20:13] "Humble yourself. Let your work work for
[01:20:16] you and then everyone else will exalt
[01:20:19] you." And so, I think most men want to
[01:20:21] be respected. They don't have respect.
[01:20:23] And so, they compensate by exalting
[01:20:25] themselves because it makes them feel
[01:20:26] better in the short term, but you look
[01:20:27] like an idiot in the long term. And
[01:20:29] think about it like this. Like, for some
[01:20:30] reason, I don't know why we're wired
[01:20:31] this way, but we say nice things about
[01:20:33] ourselves and we feel good, but everyone
[01:20:34] else feels bad, right? If everyone else
[01:20:38] says nice things about you, it doesn't
[01:20:39] make them feel bad to say it, but it
[01:20:40] makes you feel good. Think about those
[01:20:42] people in your life who always like talk
[01:20:44] themselves up. It's like, what do you
[01:20:46] see? You're like, "This guy's so
[01:20:47] insecure. It's obvious." And you look
[01:20:49] that way. You don't feel that way, but
[01:20:51] you look that way. And some of the
[01:20:52] things that you develop as you get older
[01:20:54] is the separation between how I look and
[01:20:56] how I feel, which is like, "Oh, even
[01:20:58] though this feels good, I look dumb
[01:21:00] doing this." Your feelings can lie to
[01:21:02] you in terms of how well this behavior
[01:21:05] is serving you with your goals in the
[01:21:07] long term. And while we're talking about
[01:21:09] your friends exalting you and your
[01:21:10] friends saying you're cool, how much do
[01:21:13] their opinions of you really matter? Cuz
[01:21:15] now this is going to take a completely
[01:21:16] different direction than you expected,
[01:21:17] which is you being humble is a
[01:21:20] description that other people would give
[01:21:21] to you. But it relies on you caring a
[01:21:24] lot of what they think, which is a
[01:21:25] double-edged sword. And the younger you
[01:21:27] are, actually at all points, it hurts
[01:21:29] you. It's kind of like the stock market.
[01:21:31] One person, two person. One day or two
[01:21:33] days in the stock market, it's just
[01:21:35] about sentiment. But how big the stock
[01:21:37] goes over a decade is about how good the
[01:21:40] intrinsic stock is. And so if a few
[01:21:43] people say you're an [ __ ] no big
[01:21:45] deal. If everyone says you're an
[01:21:46] [ __ ] probably a problem, right? And
[01:21:48] so it's understanding the nuance between
[01:21:50] that. But your friend group has a
[01:21:52] disproportionate sway over your
[01:21:54] behavior. And so your reference group is
[01:21:57] one of the number one correlations with
[01:21:59] how big your life gets or rather the
[01:22:03] goals you achieve. Now they've done the
[01:22:04] studies in terms of finance because it's
[01:22:06] easy to quantify but your reference
[01:22:07] group the five people you compare
[01:22:09] yourself to not necessarily spend the
[01:22:11] most time with but compare yourself to
[01:22:13] are the ones that determine your future.
[01:22:17] And so sometimes you have to like your
[01:22:20] goals more than you like your friends.
[01:22:23] And every person who wants to do
[01:22:25] something in their life or has done
[01:22:27] something with their lives is going
[01:22:28] through the exact same chapter that
[01:22:30] you're going through right now. And it's
[01:22:32] the lonely chapter. It's the chapter
[01:22:34] where you don't fit in with your old
[01:22:35] friends, but you don't have the
[01:22:37] achievements yet to fit in with a new
[01:22:39] group of friends. And you're doing all
[01:22:40] the stuff, right? The fruit tutorials.
[01:22:42] You're watching these videos and you're
[01:22:43] reading everything you can get your
[01:22:44] hands on. And you're trying to set up
[01:22:46] whatever your podcast is or your content
[01:22:48] thing, right? And you're going through
[01:22:50] it and you're thinking to yourself like,
[01:22:51] "Is this even worth it?" because you're
[01:22:52] not seeing any signs of success. But the
[01:22:54] sign of success is the hate that you get
[01:22:56] along the way. It is the leading
[01:22:58] indicator. And what you can't do is bend
[01:23:01] the knee to their hate and try and fit
[01:23:03] back in and conform because it's
[01:23:05] comfortable and it's warm. It's like the
[01:23:08] scene in the Matrix when Trinity opens
[01:23:09] the door, the very beginning in the
[01:23:11] first Matrix when Neo is about to take
[01:23:13] the red pill and he wants to get out of
[01:23:15] the car and Trinity says, "You've been
[01:23:17] down that road, Neo. you know that road
[01:23:19] and you know exactly where it ends and I
[01:23:22] know that's not where you want to be.
[01:23:24] And then he closes the door and he gets
[01:23:26] back in and he goes they they go to go
[01:23:28] take the red pill. So right now this
[01:23:30] moment that you're going through is
[01:23:31] Trinity opening the door and saying you
[01:23:34] could go back. You could go party. You
[01:23:36] could go to the nightclubs. You could
[01:23:38] say that this was just a hobby. You
[01:23:39] could downplay what you're doing like
[01:23:40] I'm just trying it out. Oh yeah. I'm not
[01:23:42] I'm not really that into it. It's just
[01:23:43] like just something I found. Right. But
[01:23:46] then as you're saying, you feel like a
[01:23:48] fake because you're lying to yourself.
[01:23:50] You're lying to them about what you what
[01:23:52] your real intentions are. And in that
[01:23:54] moment when you're trying to think about
[01:23:56] having that conversation, you'll
[01:23:57] remember exactly why you left, why it is
[01:23:59] that road. And you know exactly where it
[01:24:01] ends. And that's not where you want to
[01:24:02] be. And the thing is is that your goals
[01:24:06] will stick with you longer than these
[01:24:08] relationships. Your goals will serve you
[01:24:11] more than these relationships. And this
[01:24:13] is what this is the stuff that no one
[01:24:14] will tell you. I can tell you
[01:24:16] personally, I don't talk to I talked to
[01:24:18] one friend that I have from middle
[01:24:20] school and high school. All right? I
[01:24:22] talk to one person, two people from
[01:24:27] college. And it's not like we talk all
[01:24:29] the time. I talk to him every six months
[01:24:30] or so. And so I say this because
[01:24:32] although these relationships feel like
[01:24:34] they're incredibly important in your
[01:24:36] life right now, they will disappear. The
[01:24:38] majority of these of these friendships
[01:24:40] are based on convenience. you're only
[01:24:42] friends with them because they lived in
[01:24:43] your dorm, they lived in your
[01:24:44] neighborhood, they went in to English
[01:24:45] class with you. But as soon as your
[01:24:47] conditions change, you change where
[01:24:49] you're at. All many of them will fade
[01:24:51] away because you'll develop new skills.
[01:24:54] You'll develop new context. You'll meet
[01:24:55] new people who are upskilled from them.
[01:24:58] And then you'll compare them to compare
[01:25:00] to these people and you'll be like,
[01:25:01] "Man, these are better friends. These
[01:25:02] are people who are more aligned with my
[01:25:04] goals. They're trying to grow. When I
[01:25:05] want to work all day Saturday, they're
[01:25:07] like, cool, I'll work with you." Rather
[01:25:08] than being like, "Dude, we're going on a
[01:25:10] pontoon boat. like where are you going
[01:25:11] to be? And you have to accept that as
[01:25:15] the price. And the thing is is like it's
[01:25:17] only if you want that like if you if you
[01:25:20] want to live a life that is the same as
[01:25:23] everyone else's then you can do what
[01:25:24] everyone else does. The only issue is
[01:25:26] when you want to do what everyone else
[01:25:29] does but get what none of them have. If
[01:25:31] you want to be exceptional by definition
[01:25:34] you will be the exception. You will not
[01:25:36] be normal. You will be unlike the
[01:25:38] others. And so it makes sense that you
[01:25:41] would be in the out groupoup. And it
[01:25:43] hurts as a human being because you want
[01:25:45] to be in the in-group. It's part of our
[01:25:46] DNA. Shame is a real thing. And we don't
[01:25:49] want to feel that because in in the real
[01:25:51] in the in the n natural world, if you're
[01:25:53] outside of the group, you have a much
[01:25:55] lower likelihood of living and
[01:25:56] procreating. So it's strong in our DNA
[01:25:59] to be in group. But the thing is is that
[01:26:02] you're actually not in group or out of
[01:26:04] group. You're transitioning. You're
[01:26:06] between groups. And so in that lonely
[01:26:09] chapter, that's where you can do a
[01:26:11] disproportionate amount of work because
[01:26:13] you have no distractions. So you listen
[01:26:14] to the podcast, you read the tweets, you
[01:26:16] watch the videos, you consume the
[01:26:17] content because you know deep down, I
[01:26:19] can do more than this. And you begin to
[01:26:22] see the person that you could be and
[01:26:24] realize how far you need to go to get
[01:26:26] there. But despite how far away it
[01:26:28] seems, your goals, the best version of
[01:26:30] you, you look back down the dead end
[01:26:32] road and you know that's not where you
[01:26:33] want to be. And so you keep going and
[01:26:35] realize that there's no turning back.
[01:26:37] Once you see the promised land, once you
[01:26:39] see what you could become, you can't go
[01:26:41] back. And if you're not sure who your
[01:26:43] real friends are, one, ask, is it more
[01:26:46] likely or less likely that I hit my
[01:26:48] goals with this person in my life? Just
[01:26:50] think about it. Like, if this person
[01:26:51] isn't in my life, is it more likely my
[01:26:52] goals? Then remove them. Because it's
[01:26:54] better to have friends who force you to
[01:26:56] grow than ones who accept you as you
[01:26:58] are. Because the biggest risk to your
[01:26:59] future isn't your future competition or
[01:27:01] your rivals. It's the distraction that
[01:27:03] you insist on keeping in your life
[01:27:06] rather than doing the things you know
[01:27:08] you should be doing but aren't. Think
[01:27:09] about it like this. Imagine a competitor
[01:27:12] that you'd never want to go against.
[01:27:14] Focused, persistent, always learning,
[01:27:16] always improving, relentless, says no to
[01:27:19] everything but that which makes them
[01:27:21] stronger. You know what he looks like.
[01:27:23] You know how he acts. You know who he
[01:27:24] associates with. Great.
[01:27:28] That's future you. Now become him. You
[01:27:30] have to kill your current self for your
[01:27:33] new self to have room to grow. And so
[01:27:35] it's this constant appraisal of your
[01:27:37] skills and activities and saying which
[01:27:40] of these makes me stronger? Which of
[01:27:42] these makes it more likely for me to hit
[01:27:44] my goal? And I just want to give you
[01:27:46] that frame because that like that single
[01:27:47] frame of is this person being in my life
[01:27:50] make it more likely or less likely to
[01:27:51] hit my goal? Is this activity or this
[01:27:53] behavior that I do make it more or less
[01:27:55] likely to hit my goal? And I
[01:27:56] consistently just ask that question over
[01:27:58] and over and over again. And that is
[01:28:00] because for me, I do love my goals more
[01:28:02] than I love my friend because my goals
[01:28:04] will be with me long after they are. And
[01:28:07] so if you think about your relationship
[01:28:09] with your goals and you put it on the
[01:28:11] same pedestal or higher than your
[01:28:13] relationship with your friends, you're
[01:28:15] going to lose one of the relationships.
[01:28:17] And the question is which one is the one
[01:28:19] that's going to serve you more in the
[01:28:20] long term? That's a decision for you.
[01:28:22] But for me, I can tell you personally,
[01:28:23] achieving my goals has served me more
[01:28:25] than any one person has. And because
[01:28:28] achieving your goals is a generalized
[01:28:30] thing, it can open all doors to new
[01:28:32] relationships. And so you do have to
[01:28:35] burn sometimes what you have in order to
[01:28:36] have what you want. If you want to
[01:28:38] impress poor people, outspend them. If
[01:28:41] you want to impress rich people, outwork
[01:28:44] them. And I can tell you this being in
[01:28:46] the position that I'm at because I have
[01:28:48] tons of young men who work for me and I
[01:28:50] mean they hear all the content that I
[01:28:52] make and they know that. And so if you
[01:28:54] lease a Ferrari for $5,000 a month or
[01:28:56] whatever, I know you're not rich. And
[01:29:00] every rich person isn't impressed by
[01:29:02] that because we know what it costs. You
[01:29:04] only impress poor people. And if you do
[01:29:06] it really early in your career, every
[01:29:08] rich person's like, "Man, you should be
[01:29:09] reinvesting that to get way [ __ ]
[01:29:10] bigger." Now, if you're like an
[01:29:12] afficionado and you want to have lots of
[01:29:13] cars, and that's like, again, that's
[01:29:14] different. It depends on the reason
[01:29:15] you're doing it. It's like you shouldn't
[01:29:17] be cooking your own food unless you love
[01:29:19] cooking. But if you don't love cooking,
[01:29:21] then you should outsource that [ __ ] as
[01:29:22] fast as possible so that you can get
[01:29:23] your time back. It's understanding the
[01:29:24] context of this, which of course this
[01:29:26] will be taken out of context. But
[01:29:27] hopefully you watching or listening to
[01:29:30] this can at least get it. Leila and I
[01:29:32] both collectively started buying nicer
[01:29:34] things. So living in nicer places,
[01:29:36] having nicer cars, I bought my home,
[01:29:38] which was a nice house in Austin. I
[01:29:40] think it cost me 1.7 million. I bought
[01:29:42] it in cash and I bought it off one
[01:29:44] month's paycheck. And so I want to put
[01:29:46] that in context to like was it a ball
[01:29:48] and house? Totally. It was sick. I was
[01:29:50] super happy to be there. But where I
[01:29:53] lived before that cost me 1,200 bucks a
[01:29:55] month. And so you're like, wait, 1.6,
[01:29:57] right? We spend money, but by
[01:29:59] percentage, the amount of money we spend
[01:30:01] is inconsequential. If you want to buy
[01:30:03] the toys and you want to buy that stuff,
[01:30:05] I would say sure, understand one,
[01:30:07] whatever you spend, you're taking away
[01:30:08] from the future. Now, there is always a
[01:30:10] point you have to balance between
[01:30:11] consumption and investment. If you never
[01:30:13] spend anything, you live you live your
[01:30:14] entire life and you end up with a big
[01:30:15] pile of money and you didn't enjoy any
[01:30:18] moment of that. I don't think that's the
[01:30:19] way to do it. But I do think there's a
[01:30:21] ratio there and I think that ratio
[01:30:22] depends on you as an individual. I tend
[01:30:24] to always overindex on investment
[01:30:25] because I just I want to become a really
[01:30:27] like great version of me and I think
[01:30:30] that's going to cost money and it's
[01:30:31] going to cost time and I like to be
[01:30:33] ready for those opportunities because
[01:30:34] the opportunities get bigger and have
[01:30:35] more zeros next to them and there's no
[01:30:37] masterminds you get to at a certain
[01:30:39] level. you just do a deal with someone
[01:30:40] and if for me to pony up for the deal
[01:30:41] might be like, "Hey, you got to write a
[01:30:42] check for 10 million." I'm like, "All
[01:30:43] right, I got to have that ready for just
[01:30:46] like on the sidelines waiting for
[01:30:47] opportunities, right?" And so the idea
[01:30:51] is being on the defensive so that you
[01:30:54] can be on the offensive. It's living far
[01:30:56] below your lifestyle so that you can
[01:30:58] more heavily invest in the growth of the
[01:30:59] business. And so your lifestyle is your
[01:31:02] competitor's opportunity. There's you
[01:31:04] and other version of you. There's
[01:31:05] bizarro you, right? And Bizaru wants to
[01:31:08] live this great lifestyle and has the
[01:31:09] Ferrari and the nicer place and
[01:31:11] whatever. But when an opportunity comes
[01:31:12] along, Bizarro doesn't have any savings
[01:31:15] because he's trying to to show face,
[01:31:17] right? But the thing is is that
[01:31:18] everybody who's trying to show face for
[01:31:20] hates him anyways cuz it looks like he's
[01:31:21] bragging. But also, they know how much
[01:31:24] he makes relatively and they're like,
[01:31:25] "God, he's got to be spending his whole
[01:31:26] paycheck. He looks irresponsible."
[01:31:28] There's zero advantage to being
[01:31:31] accurately judged. If you are strong,
[01:31:33] you want to appear weak. You want to
[01:31:35] have more money than people expect you
[01:31:37] to have. And so for me, when we did buy
[01:31:40] the Bentley, which I bought because I
[01:31:42] got, I'll be honest, I got pressured
[01:31:44] into it. They're like, "Dude, come on.
[01:31:45] You make all this money. Like, buy
[01:31:47] something nice for yourself." And I was
[01:31:48] like, "I guess people buy nice cars."
[01:31:49] So, I bought a car. I bought a Bentley.
[01:31:51] And um I returned it 6 months later. Uh
[01:31:54] and I lost 20 grand on it. And I was
[01:31:55] like, "This was just a complete waste of
[01:31:57] everything." Like, I just don't care at
[01:31:59] all about this because you only need
[01:32:00] three things to win. You can write this
[01:32:02] down. the balls to start, the brains to
[01:32:05] learn, and the heart to never quit. And
[01:32:07] the good news is you already have all
[01:32:09] three. You're just not using them.
[01:32:10] Because fundamentally, if you found
[01:32:12] somebody and they started and they
[01:32:13] continued to get better and they never
[01:32:15] stopped, they would win. Just think
[01:32:16] about it from fundamental basics. Like
[01:32:17] if I said, okay, think of a person who
[01:32:20] only did one thing and all they
[01:32:22] dedicated their entire life to is doing
[01:32:23] that one thing and getting better and
[01:32:25] better at that thing and they did it for
[01:32:26] 50 years. Do you think that person would
[01:32:28] not be incredibly successful? Of course
[01:32:30] they would be. then why aren't you doing
[01:32:32] it? The problem is it's never been
[01:32:34] easier to start a business. It's also
[01:32:37] never been easier to do nothing at all.
[01:32:39] And this is what I mean by your
[01:32:40] distractions are the things that are
[01:32:42] getting in your way, preventing you from
[01:32:44] doing the things you already know you
[01:32:45] should be doing but aren't. Right now,
[01:32:46] if I were to say, "Hey, go get in shape.
[01:32:48] What do you need to do?" What you want
[01:32:49] to say is, "I'm going to go do some
[01:32:50] research to find the best program and to
[01:32:52] find the best diet." But if I just said,
[01:32:53] "No, no, no. You can't look." Make a
[01:32:55] guess. What would you say? You're
[01:32:56] probably like, "Well, I need probably
[01:32:57] like go to the gym, probably do some
[01:32:58] weights, probably do some cardio, move a
[01:33:00] little bit." Or would I say, "Do you
[01:33:01] want to stay at the same weight? Do you
[01:33:03] want to stay at the same cardio pace or
[01:33:04] do you want to move those up over time?"
[01:33:05] You probably say, "I want to move those
[01:33:06] up over time." Like, okay. And then
[01:33:08] food-wise, like, do you want to probably
[01:33:09] eat more protein and eat like [ __ ] You
[01:33:11] probably be like, "Yeah." Like, well,
[01:33:12] why don't we just start there? Most of
[01:33:14] the things you need to do, you already
[01:33:16] know what to do, and you delay doing
[01:33:17] them by under the guise of having a
[01:33:19] better plan. But the reality is that
[01:33:21] your plan is always going to change as
[01:33:22] soon as you get new information. And so
[01:33:24] the point is to start period and learn.
[01:33:27] And it's giving yourself permission to
[01:33:29] have the humility to start a role that
[01:33:32] you know is not going to be your endgame
[01:33:34] because you just see it as one tile on
[01:33:36] the painting that's going to become the
[01:33:38] version of you that you want. It's like
[01:33:39] I got to start at this corner. I'm going
[01:33:41] to paint this corner up because I know
[01:33:42] that this cornerstone of experience in
[01:33:45] doortodoor or cold calling or media
[01:33:49] buying, whatever, is going to be
[01:33:51] something that I can build my whole
[01:33:52] career off of. There are maybe trillions
[01:33:55] of dollars, but at least hundreds of
[01:33:57] billions of dollars that are being made
[01:33:59] and dedicated every day to getting you
[01:34:00] to do nothing. It's not a fair fight. I
[01:34:02] want to be clear. It's not a fair fight.
[01:34:04] And they're winning. And so, I love this
[01:34:06] from from Andy Fcell. said personal
[01:34:09] excellence is the ultimate rebellion.
[01:34:11] And so I think like you want to be a
[01:34:13] [ __ ] rebel, be excellent and do it
[01:34:15] for you. Like you want to stick it to
[01:34:17] the man now, just be great.
[01:34:19] Fundamentally, the point of
[01:34:20] entertainment is to get someone to pay
[01:34:22] attention to it. That's all
[01:34:24] entertainment does is pay attention to
[01:34:25] me, right? And so that means that you're
[01:34:29] not paying attention to the thing that
[01:34:31] matters more to you in the long term.
[01:34:33] And so every dollar, every minute of
[01:34:35] attention you pay to entertainment,
[01:34:37] whether that's porn, alcohol, going out
[01:34:39] to clubs, uh, all of social media in
[01:34:41] general, motivation, porn, if you will,
[01:34:44] all of that is you not doing what you
[01:34:48] need to do to get to where you want to
[01:34:49] go. You just have to be able to do
[01:34:50] things without seeing an immediate
[01:34:52] reward. Like, if there's one meta skill
[01:34:54] that that overshadows all of this, it's
[01:34:57] your ability to delay gratification. Is
[01:34:59] to delay a moment of reward. That's it.
[01:35:02] Like that's all you have to do. And in
[01:35:04] the beginning, you just have to be able
[01:35:04] to do it long enough that you get one
[01:35:06] reward. And that reward is typically
[01:35:07] outsized in its strength. And then that
[01:35:09] will reinforce you sticking with it.
[01:35:11] Because the people who do work really
[01:35:12] really hard, it's not like they're made
[01:35:13] of different flesh and blood than you.
[01:35:14] It just means that they had a short
[01:35:15] period at some point where they said,
[01:35:16] "I'm going to shut everything else off
[01:35:17] and I'm going to go all in on this." And
[01:35:19] then when they do get that first
[01:35:20] feedback loop like, "Holy [ __ ] I made
[01:35:21] my first sale. Holy [ __ ] I I got my
[01:35:23] first lead from from ads. Holy [ __ ] I
[01:35:25] got my first, you know, 100 followers."
[01:35:27] Whatever. It doesn't matter. like you
[01:35:28] have some feedback loop for whatever it
[01:35:30] is that you're trying to go after that
[01:35:32] then encourages you to do more and
[01:35:34] you're like, "Oh, this could work." And
[01:35:35] then as soon as that turns on, you can
[01:35:36] get obsessed with it. If I had you sign
[01:35:38] a contract right now to be that you the
[01:35:40] guaranteed that you'd be a millionaire
[01:35:42] in 10 years, but you couldn't make any
[01:35:44] real money between now and then, would
[01:35:45] you sign it? Every person I've asked
[01:35:47] says yes. And so maybe if you are
[01:35:50] listening to this and you're nodding
[01:35:51] your head like, "Okay, if I'm 30, I'm a
[01:35:52] millionaire." Yeah, it sounds like a
[01:35:53] great deal. By the way, that's like 0
[01:35:55] whatever 1%. Like no one is. But if
[01:35:57] that's you, a lot of stuff takes much
[01:36:00] longer. And the problem is that when
[01:36:01] you're 20, you've only been an adult for
[01:36:03] like 3 seconds. And so the thing is that
[01:36:04] 3 seconds feels like a very long time.
[01:36:06] But I have this belief that older people
[01:36:10] are more patient, not because they're
[01:36:13] actually more patient. It's just because
[01:36:15] your perception of time speeds up. I can
[01:36:17] be more patient than a 5-year-old
[01:36:19] because for me, one year is not 20% of
[01:36:22] my life. So my perception of time
[01:36:24] shrinks. I might have the same patience
[01:36:26] as a 5-year-old. It's just that more
[01:36:28] time passes. And so, if you are younger,
[01:36:31] then you have to just understand that
[01:36:33] your perception of time will speed up.
[01:36:34] And so, you will be able to exhibit
[01:36:38] patience. You'll keep being able to do
[01:36:39] something else in the meantime because
[01:36:41] the meantime will pass faster. And so,
[01:36:44] you have to overindex on it when you're
[01:36:46] starting. I mean, I've got guys on my
[01:36:47] team who are like, "Hey, what's my next
[01:36:49] career move?" And they're like 30 days
[01:36:50] into their job. And I'm like,
[01:36:53] "Give it a second." like you still suck.
[01:36:57] >> Like you went from suck to proficient,
[01:36:59] like you're not great yet. Calm down.
[01:37:00] The real world is very different from
[01:37:01] school, which you've already, if you're
[01:37:03] watching my stuff, you already kind of
[01:37:04] have an idea about that. But I want to
[01:37:05] give you the more of the behavioral
[01:37:06] definition around it is that with
[01:37:08] school, you have very clear directions
[01:37:09] and a clear outcome with a clear
[01:37:11] timeline and you get a grade
[01:37:12] immediately. So that's kind of like the
[01:37:13] reward or feedback loop, right? And
[01:37:14] sometimes it's pop quiz, same day, next
[01:37:16] day, you get the the feedback loop. Or
[01:37:17] even you get you finish the quiz, you go
[01:37:19] outside and you're like, "Hey, would you
[01:37:20] answer for six?" And you're like, "Ah,
[01:37:21] [ __ ] I got it wrong." Or whatever,
[01:37:22] right? But the thing is is the world is
[01:37:24] completely opposite of that. And so the
[01:37:25] re the thing is that beginners are
[01:37:26] paralyzed to make a decision because
[01:37:28] they assume the real world works like
[01:37:30] school and only has one right answer.
[01:37:32] But reality is is that there are many
[01:37:35] right answers with only one wrong answer
[01:37:37] which is doing nothing. And that's the
[01:37:39] answer that most people pick. So I was
[01:37:41] talking to Neil Patel who's a friend of
[01:37:42] mine and he just made this uh this big
[01:37:44] tweet about this but he and I had had a
[01:37:45] conversation about it earlier. He has
[01:37:46] two friends. One who's a public uh CEO,
[01:37:50] found a company, took it public. He's
[01:37:52] got another friend who found a company,
[01:37:53] took it public, took it back private,
[01:37:54] and then now only does private deals.
[01:37:56] The guy who does public and made all his
[01:37:58] money public is like, you got to go
[01:38:00] public. And the other guy who took his
[01:38:02] company public and it was a big mess and
[01:38:04] then took it private again is actually
[01:38:05] richer than the guy who made his company
[01:38:07] public. Both those guys are billionaires
[01:38:09] and both gave advice and they had
[01:38:11] differing advice. And so I don't see it
[01:38:13] as one is right or wrong. It's that
[01:38:15] there are many right paths, but only one
[01:38:18] thing will prevent you from achieving
[01:38:20] all of it, which is the only thing I'm
[01:38:21] trying to conquer in this video is
[01:38:23] getting you to not do the one wrong
[01:38:24] path, which is fear. Fear of not making
[01:38:28] it work. Fear of of other people's
[01:38:30] disapproval who don't matter anyways.
[01:38:33] That you aren't cool anymore or because
[01:38:36] you don't show up to social events or
[01:38:38] because you don't blow money on stuff
[01:38:39] that doesn't matter anymore or you're
[01:38:41] not wearing the brands that they think
[01:38:42] are cool. Is all of that worth you for
[01:38:45] the rest of your life having the
[01:38:47] crushing feeling of mediocrity knowing
[01:38:49] you could do more? And I say, and I can
[01:38:52] describe this because I've lived it.
[01:38:54] It's why I say it. I'm not saying that
[01:38:55] that stuff's not going to happen. It
[01:38:57] absolutely will happen. And it might
[01:38:58] even be worse than you imagine. But you
[01:39:01] will not die. And if you use the frame,
[01:39:04] does me losing all of these
[01:39:06] relationships and having more time
[01:39:08] increase the likelihood that I get to my
[01:39:09] goal or decrease the likelihood that I
[01:39:11] get to my goal?
[01:39:13] All of a sudden, when you use the goal
[01:39:14] frame of the best version of you, all of
[01:39:17] a sudden it starts to it starts to make
[01:39:20] things a lot clearer. It's like, no, me
[01:39:22] going to this bachelorette party does
[01:39:24] not increase the likelihood to hit my
[01:39:25] goals.
[01:39:27] And I'm not saying that you have to to
[01:39:29] make that sacrifice every time, but the
[01:39:31] thing is is you're making a sacrifice
[01:39:33] either way. You're either sacrificing
[01:39:34] your goals or you're sacrificing that
[01:39:36] relationship. And so some of you guys
[01:39:38] are like, "Oh, Alex, that sounds
[01:39:40] unbalanced." I'm going to get a couple,
[01:39:41] you know, comments from uh the [ __ ]
[01:39:43] online therapists of like, I think
[01:39:45] emotional well-being and mental health
[01:39:47] is super important. Well, first off, the
[01:39:49] pendulum swinging back. No one gives a
[01:39:50] [ __ ] about the soft stuff anymore. Thank
[01:39:52] [ __ ] God. But at some point everyone
[01:39:55] who wants to achieve great things
[01:39:57] realizes that balance is a myth. And
[01:39:59] once they realize that they become
[01:40:01] someone who achieves great things. At
[01:40:04] some point every person who wants to
[01:40:06] achieve great things realizes that
[01:40:08] balance is a myth. And once they realize
[01:40:11] that they become someone who achieves
[01:40:14] great things. And so there's this whole
[01:40:17] misnomer this whole idea. Think about
[01:40:19] what mediocrity is. It's about being in
[01:40:21] the middle. It's the medium. That's
[01:40:23] being right in the middle, right?
[01:40:24] Balance.
[01:40:26] But anybody who is imbalanced is another
[01:40:29] way of saying more focused on the one
[01:40:32] thing will be better at that thing than
[01:40:34] you. And the question is just whether or
[01:40:35] not that thing that they choose to be
[01:40:37] better at will give them more leverage
[01:40:38] over all that other stuff later.
[01:40:41] And so if you work very hard and you
[01:40:44] create something that's very valuable
[01:40:45] for society, I promise you, you will be
[01:40:47] able to find a hotter wife. I promise
[01:40:50] you, you will have the money that you
[01:40:51] want. I promise you, you can buy the
[01:40:52] time that you want to have. You'll have
[01:40:54] all of that at your disposal. But if you
[01:40:57] choose the balanced life, there's
[01:40:59] nothing wrong with that. I just see that
[01:41:01] there's balance over a lifetime rather
[01:41:03] than balance at every moment of life.
[01:41:06] And so, you might have seasons like I
[01:41:08] took basically a year off during the
[01:41:10] last year of gym launch. I just didn't
[01:41:12] really do a lot. So, I had more time
[01:41:14] than anybody and money, right? But I had
[01:41:17] seasons before that where I didn't take
[01:41:19] any time off. And so I think if you
[01:41:20] expand your time horizon for what
[01:41:21] balance really means that this is a
[01:41:23] softer way of explaining it. Uh then I
[01:41:26] think that that will you know make you
[01:41:28] sleep well at night. But real talk I
[01:41:30] work all the time because I like to do
[01:41:32] it. And I think that once you get a fast
[01:41:34] feedback loop with the work that you
[01:41:36] like that also propels your goals then
[01:41:38] you're not going to want to do anything
[01:41:38] else. And that's it's not like I or some
[01:41:41] of the people that all right it's not
[01:41:43] like the people that you look up to have
[01:41:44] some sort of herculean work ethic or
[01:41:46] discipline that you don't. They like
[01:41:48] things that happen to also bring them
[01:41:50] status. And that means that they went
[01:41:53] through a small period where they
[01:41:54] started doing that thing when they
[01:41:55] weren't good at it and it didn't bring
[01:41:56] them status, but they were able to make
[01:41:58] it through that bridge until eventually
[01:41:59] did start working and did bring them
[01:42:01] status and then they just kept going. So
[01:42:03] you just need enough gusto to start and
[01:42:06] just get through that period to just get
[01:42:08] through your friends saying you suck for
[01:42:10] a little bit. And everything you start
[01:42:11] will not be fun because you'll suck. But
[01:42:13] getting good is fun. Getting better is
[01:42:16] fun. And so I get excited a lot of times
[01:42:18] when I see how bad I am at something
[01:42:20] that's new because I have enough
[01:42:21] generalized reinforcement for learning
[01:42:23] how to get better at things that you
[01:42:25] learn the skill of getting better. Like
[01:42:27] that's a meta skill. You learn how to
[01:42:29] learn. And so just see it as an
[01:42:30] opportunity to learn how to do anything
[01:42:31] better. So if you have a first thing,
[01:42:33] then that's the first thing that you get
[01:42:34] better at. And then you'll learn the
[01:42:35] skill of getting better and you can
[01:42:36] apply it all over the place. So, if
[01:42:37] you're a business owner and you'd like
[01:42:39] to scale, I'd like to invite you out to
[01:42:40] my headquarters for one of our scaling
[01:42:42] workshops where we help identify and
[01:42:44] solve your number one constraint so you
[01:42:46] can start the year with lots of
[01:42:48] momentum. And so, if that sounds at all
[01:42:49] interesting, click the link below, book
[01:42:50] a call with my team, and if you're a
[01:42:52] fit, we'd love to see out of it. Some of
[01:42:53] you guys are listening to this and
[01:42:54] you're like, "Okay, you know, this is
[01:42:57] great. I'm feeling awesome." The thing
[01:42:58] is is that people, maybe it's you, are
[01:43:01] waiting for this perfect moment, but it
[01:43:03] doesn't come right. It happens the
[01:43:06] moment you decide that you're fed up
[01:43:08] with waiting and decide to take action.
[01:43:10] And it only becomes the perfect moment
[01:43:12] when you look back on it because today
[01:43:14] it just looks like now. I had a
[01:43:16] conversation with a young man yesterday
[01:43:17] who said, "Listen, I have demons."
[01:43:22] And I was like, "Bro, you don't have
[01:43:25] [ __ ] demons." I was like, "Shut up."
[01:43:28] And he was like, [laughter]
[01:43:29] I was like, "The thing is And I I was so
[01:43:31] visceral with my reaction because I used
[01:43:33] to say that kind of stuff because I
[01:43:34] thought it made me hard. I thought it
[01:43:36] made me complex. I thought it made
[01:43:37] mysterious. But it's you don't have
[01:43:40] demons. You're not self-sabotaging. You
[01:43:42] don't have mom or dad issues. What you
[01:43:44] have is a lack of skills in how to
[01:43:47] behave in a certain condition. So when
[01:43:50] you say you have demons, what it really
[01:43:52] means if I say, okay, what do you mean
[01:43:54] by that? Define that. How do what is
[01:43:56] define having demons? Right? What I
[01:43:59] don't most people say that they don't
[01:44:00] mean they actually think they have
[01:44:01] spiritual demons inside of them. I'm not
[01:44:03] even going to touch that. What they
[01:44:04] really mean is that under these
[01:44:06] conditions I behave a way that is not
[01:44:08] ideal. And so what that means is you
[01:44:10] have a skill deficiency. No [ __ ] You're
[01:44:13] inexperienced. Of course you have a
[01:44:15] skill deficiency. You don't have demons.
[01:44:17] You don't know how to be consistent.
[01:44:19] You're not you don't have I I just can't
[01:44:21] stay with anybody for a long time. No.
[01:44:22] It either means you have really high
[01:44:23] standards, which is fine, and you
[01:44:25] haven't met that person yet, or you just
[01:44:27] don't know how to behave consistently.
[01:44:29] It's like when I have a sales guy who's
[01:44:31] like, "Hey, you know, I'm 30 days into
[01:44:33] this role and I'm getting I'm getting
[01:44:34] kind of bored taking sales calls." I'm
[01:44:36] like, "Oh, your ability to not be able
[01:44:38] to continue after something gets boring
[01:44:42] and learn to love the incremental
[01:44:45] improvements, the hundred or thousand
[01:44:47] repetitions is the skill discrepancy
[01:44:50] that you need to overcome. The best
[01:44:52] salespeople,
[01:44:54] bad salespeople try and have a couple
[01:44:57] good days. Good salespeople get on hot
[01:45:00] streaks. Great salespeople never get
[01:45:02] cold. And so that takes discipline to
[01:45:04] understand how to consistently get
[01:45:06] yourself hot, how to consistently treat
[01:45:09] every sale the same way you do when
[01:45:11] you're on fire. Because there is no
[01:45:14] being on fire. It means you simply
[01:45:16] behave differently. It's not like you
[01:45:18] have magic. You you pause differently.
[01:45:21] You take longer spaces, you ask the
[01:45:23] question, your tonality shifts. And
[01:45:25] those are skills because you can learn
[01:45:27] them. And so this whole thing of like,
[01:45:30] this is this young man, I'm traumatized.
[01:45:32] First off, you don't even know a [ __ ]
[01:45:34] definition of trauma. All right? Trauma
[01:45:36] is a permanent change in behavior from
[01:45:38] an aversive stimulus, meaning something
[01:45:40] bad happens and forever it changes how
[01:45:42] you act. Now, let's if we understand
[01:45:45] that as the definition of trauma, is
[01:45:48] trauma bad? Well, if I touch a stove and
[01:45:51] then I never touch a stove again when
[01:45:52] it's hot, is that trauma bad? It
[01:45:54] permanently changed my behavior from an
[01:45:56] aversive stimulus. Is that trauma bad?
[01:45:58] Well, it prevented me from get burning
[01:46:00] the house down from, you know,
[01:46:02] permanently damaging my hand in the
[01:46:03] future. No, I would say it was good. And
[01:46:05] so this whole appraisal of your past
[01:46:07] being tough or you don't understand,
[01:46:10] bro. No. And no one cares either. They
[01:46:12] don't understand, nor do they care. And
[01:46:14] so all anyone is going to care about is
[01:46:16] how you act, how you behave, what you do
[01:46:19] based on a series of conditions. And so
[01:46:21] you just need to expose yourself to the
[01:46:24] conditions so that you can get the
[01:46:25] repetition so that you can learn how to
[01:46:27] overcome it. The thing that determines
[01:46:28] whether it's good or bad is whether it
[01:46:30] creates a behavior that's conducive to
[01:46:31] your goals. And so that means that
[01:46:34] fundamentally you can have a stimulus
[01:46:35] like touching the stove that creates a
[01:46:37] behavior that is conducive to the goal.
[01:46:39] In that way, trauma was good. So, by the
[01:46:43] way, parents, when you punish a child,
[01:46:45] the hope is that you traumatize them. Is
[01:46:46] that you permanently change their
[01:46:47] behavior from an aversive stimulus? It's
[01:46:50] just that people don't define words and
[01:46:51] they just shout them all over the place.
[01:46:52] Say, say it's stored in your body. It's
[01:46:53] energy. It's like, no one even knows
[01:46:54] what the [ __ ] that means. Show me on
[01:46:57] someone's body where it's stored. Do me
[01:46:59] an X-ray. Show me where this No. Come
[01:47:00] on. Like, you're saying you're you
[01:47:02] you're storing your emotional trauma
[01:47:04] from your father and your liver.
[01:47:08] Like I can just say words and make
[01:47:10] things up and get people to not if I say
[01:47:11] them with conviction. It doesn't make.
[01:47:13] And so you may have been fooled because
[01:47:16] sometimes it's more convenient to say
[01:47:18] you can cast your power onto this thing
[01:47:20] that happened that was outside of your
[01:47:22] control as the reason why you can't be
[01:47:23] successful because it's easier to say
[01:47:26] that than to say that I chose not to do
[01:47:29] anything about it anyways.
[01:47:31] And again, listen, you can do whatever
[01:47:33] you want. You can just keep wallowing in
[01:47:34] that. You can keep saying that that's
[01:47:35] the reason. And wherever you point is
[01:47:37] where your power is, right? But the only
[01:47:39] time that you'll have more power is if
[01:47:40] you say it's on you. Period. Because all
[01:47:43] of those things may have happened and
[01:47:44] they may have all been terrible. And
[01:47:47] what are you going to do about it,
[01:47:48] right? Because the only per like no one
[01:47:51] cares. Like the world doesn't care. You
[01:47:54] care, which is fine, but like no one
[01:47:55] else does. And the sooner you realize
[01:47:58] that, the sooner you can start doing
[01:47:59] something about it. And so also think
[01:48:02] about this. It's the equal opposite. If
[01:48:06] trauma can create good things, then also
[01:48:09] means that good things can create bad
[01:48:11] behaviors. And so if you win the lottery
[01:48:14] and then you have all these behaviors
[01:48:15] that happen afterwards that are
[01:48:17] negative, then was it good for you? Like
[01:48:20] we talk about these rich and privileged
[01:48:22] kids because it creates behaviors that
[01:48:23] people that actually make it less likely
[01:48:24] they achieve things later. And so just
[01:48:28] think about what occurred and what
[01:48:30] behaviors you take as a result and
[01:48:32] separate good or bad from it. And just
[01:48:33] think, does it make it more likely that
[01:48:34] I hit my goals?
[01:48:37] It makes life a lot easier. And then it
[01:48:40] stops you from speaking in voodoo and
[01:48:42] speaking and appealing to mysticism and
[01:48:44] magic. Like there's this this force
[01:48:47] around I have demons. It's like, dude,
[01:48:49] no. Like you had a girl who cheated on
[01:48:52] you. Okay. Now, what does that change
[01:48:54] about your behavior? I have trust
[01:48:55] issues. No, it just means that under
[01:48:58] these conditions, you are slower to give
[01:49:02] someone access to your bank account or
[01:49:05] slower to move in with someone, who
[01:49:08] cares? And is that a bad thing? And so,
[01:49:10] I'll walk you through a three-step
[01:49:11] framework that has been unbelievably
[01:49:14] valuable to me. And this is from Dr.
[01:49:15] Cashy. Logic, evidence, utility.
[01:49:20] Logic is what does that mean? So, you
[01:49:23] have demons. Okay. What does that mean?
[01:49:25] Define it in terms of behavior. What
[01:49:27] does that mean? Okay, got it. Now, how
[01:49:30] do you know that evidence? So, you say,
[01:49:33] "I have demons." We unpack that and it
[01:49:35] means that uh for you, you
[01:49:38] self-sabotage, which again, define that.
[01:49:41] Okay? It means that I show up late to
[01:49:43] meetings after I get into a job after
[01:49:47] two months of being on time. Okay? So
[01:49:49] after two months of being on time, you
[01:49:50] start being late to stuff that we
[01:49:53] translated from I have demons to I
[01:49:56] self-sabotage to that is the behavior
[01:49:58] that occurs. Got it? Now I would say how
[01:50:01] do you know that? Now a lot of times
[01:50:03] people are like well it's happened. But
[01:50:04] when you actually look at it like it
[01:50:06] happened three times over in, you know,
[01:50:08] in my my last job. Okay. Is it really a
[01:50:12] a problem as you define it or it
[01:50:14] happened in those three occurrences?
[01:50:16] Okay, got it. So now you know now most
[01:50:18] times people are like I don't have any
[01:50:20] data and you're like okay so then this
[01:50:21] is basically made up and when I say made
[01:50:23] up I'm not saying it's like you are a
[01:50:25] liar. I'm just saying that humans work
[01:50:26] in narratives and a lot of times we add
[01:50:28] narratives stories to things that don't
[01:50:30] actually mean anything but it's
[01:50:33] convenient and it's fun and we like
[01:50:34] talking about it but it doesn't mean
[01:50:35] it's true. And so then you move to the
[01:50:37] third one which is and so what utility
[01:50:40] who cares why does this matter? And so
[01:50:43] then you say, "Okay, well this matters
[01:50:45] because it decreases the likelihood that
[01:50:47] I will be able to retain future
[01:50:48] employment." Fine. Then what do we do
[01:50:50] about it? And so you can walk through
[01:50:53] things that you have struggled with in
[01:50:55] the past with simply saying, "Let me
[01:50:56] define this in terms of behavior. How
[01:50:59] what evidence do I have that this is
[01:51:00] actually true that that I've defined it
[01:51:01] based on these things?" And who cares?
[01:51:05] I have demons in the kitchen. All right.
[01:51:07] Just as a completely ridiculous example.
[01:51:09] Okay. Well, in my past, I I've had bad
[01:51:12] things happen, bro. Like, what? Like,
[01:51:15] what occurred? I touched the stove and
[01:51:17] it burned me. Okay, great. Now, we have
[01:51:21] some evidence-wise. How many times did
[01:51:23] it happen? One time. Okay. And it never
[01:51:26] happened again in the future. Okay. What
[01:51:27] did that result in? I don't go into
[01:51:28] kitchens anymore. Okay. Now, this is
[01:51:31] good or bad. When you say, "Who cares?"
[01:51:33] It's in relation to what? My goals. Does
[01:51:37] you not going into the kitchen prevent
[01:51:38] you from achieving your goals? Well, if
[01:51:40] you want to be a chef, yes. If you want
[01:51:42] to be an entrepreneur, no. If you want
[01:51:44] to be a kitchen entrepreneur, probably,
[01:51:46] right? And so, the question is just who
[01:51:48] cares? Why does it matter? And so, so
[01:51:50] much of our time and effort goes into
[01:51:53] explaining things to people that don't
[01:51:56] matter at all that you could literally
[01:51:58] just move on from and just literally
[01:52:00] forget about. You could get over that
[01:52:02] quote trauma by changing the behavior
[01:52:04] that it changed aversively. So in this
[01:52:07] context or in this condition, I behave
[01:52:08] this way and it's not conducive to my
[01:52:10] goals. Great. That's good that you've
[01:52:11] identified it. Cool. So what do we need
[01:52:13] to do so that when you're in the
[01:52:14] condition, how can we increase the
[01:52:16] likelihood that you do act the way that
[01:52:17] you want to? And then you start stacking
[01:52:18] the deck to start shifting the pendulum
[01:52:21] in your favor. And you start attacking
[01:52:23] each of these little problems from
[01:52:24] skills that you have, whether it's
[01:52:26] behavior with people or it's skills at
[01:52:28] work or with a relationship. And you
[01:52:29] just do it one by one by one. And if you
[01:52:31] do it over a very long period of time,
[01:52:32] you get better. I promise you. And I'm
[01:52:34] saying this to somebody who I struggled
[01:52:36] with my demons. You don't understand,
[01:52:38] bro. Like, I have stuff. Like, okay,
[01:52:42] but it doesn't help you. And it also
[01:52:45] doesn't make you look harder.
[01:52:48] It just makes you less capable.
[01:52:51] Losers talk about what happened to them.
[01:52:53] Winners talk about what they made happen
[01:52:56] despite it. Hardship is a reality for
[01:52:59] losers. to winners. Hardship is just
[01:53:02] your origin story. And like I promise
[01:53:05] you, if you can use this frame, like I
[01:53:06] was texting Leila the other day, like
[01:53:07] the bigger the monster, the more epic
[01:53:09] the hero. It's the story that you're
[01:53:10] going to someday tell. When you're 85,
[01:53:12] you're not going to want more boring
[01:53:14] stories, right? The idea is that if
[01:53:17] you're going through hardship now,
[01:53:18] that's the story that you're going to
[01:53:19] tell. And if you believe yourself to be
[01:53:20] the hero that you want to someday
[01:53:22] become, then the harder it is, you're
[01:53:24] like, "Bring it. This is my story. This
[01:53:26] is the Spider-Man getting bitten. This
[01:53:27] is him getting beat up by the bullies.
[01:53:29] This is the origin story. No one cares
[01:53:31] about a hero who never had it hard. I
[01:53:33] bought a lottery ticket years and years
[01:53:35] and years ago when I was in college
[01:53:37] because it was like a a billion or
[01:53:39] something like that back back then that
[01:53:41] was when a billion dollars meant
[01:53:42] something. Um
[01:53:45] but I was in college and the and my
[01:53:47] girlfriend at the time I was talking to
[01:53:49] her and the drawing was that we bought
[01:53:51] them for fun. We bought one ticket. I
[01:53:53] wasn't expecting to win, but it was just
[01:53:54] a it basically I was buying her for the
[01:53:55] conversation. And I thought about it as
[01:53:57] like the drawing got closer and I
[01:53:59] realized I had this big pang of anxiety
[01:54:00] because I was like, "What if I win?" And
[01:54:03] I had this moment of terror because I
[01:54:06] realized that if I won that I would
[01:54:07] never be able to achieve anything that
[01:54:09] anyone thought was my own.
[01:54:12] And that thought terrified me. And
[01:54:15] thankfully I didn't win the billion
[01:54:17] dollars. Um, and I got to make the life
[01:54:19] that I have. And so I think that I think
[01:54:21] Epictitus says this, but it's something
[01:54:23] to the degree of what a shame it would
[01:54:25] be for someone to never encounter
[01:54:27] hardship because they would never be
[01:54:29] able to see who they are.
[01:54:31] And so I think that if you have gone
[01:54:33] through hardship or you are going
[01:54:35] through hardship, this is the
[01:54:37] opportunity to prove to yourself, not
[01:54:39] anyone else, that you are who you say
[01:54:41] you are and you are made of what you say
[01:54:44] you are made of. And you can choose
[01:54:47] to allow that hardship to make you
[01:54:50] harder, to make you more resilient, to
[01:54:52] make you more persistent, to make you
[01:54:54] more relentless, to make you more driven
[01:54:55] towards whatever you want to do or
[01:54:58] whoever you want to be. Or you can allow
[01:55:00] it to be an ankle weight. You can allow
[01:55:02] it to be your trauma, right? That is
[01:55:05] your demon that you're fighting every
[01:55:07] day. But the thing is is like everyone
[01:55:10] has demons. Everyone has hard [ __ ] And
[01:55:13] I want to tell you this frame that'll
[01:55:15] hopefully change someone's perspective,
[01:55:17] which is that your hard stuff may have
[01:55:20] been harder than other people's hard
[01:55:22] stuff, but if I take a human being who
[01:55:24] has never encountered anything and then
[01:55:26] I poke them with a needle, that will be
[01:55:28] a 10 out of 10 hardship for them. And so
[01:55:30] I believe personally that humans
[01:55:33] experience pain the same way. It's why
[01:55:36] when a man feels disrespected, it hurts
[01:55:39] just as much as someone else going
[01:55:42] through another crazy hardship. And you
[01:55:44] know what? Even if that guy's white, a
[01:55:47] 10 out of 10 pain still feels like a 10
[01:55:49] out of 10 pain. Now, could that pain be
[01:55:52] less on the absolute scale of worst
[01:55:54] scenario? Yeah, it could be. But also,
[01:55:58] who cares?
[01:56:00] And so my point here is that every
[01:56:02] single human being on earth has gone
[01:56:03] through their version of 10 out of 10
[01:56:05] pain which normalizes pain across the
[01:56:07] spectrum which then leaves you with the
[01:56:09] only natural thing you have left which
[01:56:10] is what do I do now? And if you wanted
[01:56:12] to design the perfect version of you,
[01:56:14] the savage competitor, the gladiator at
[01:56:16] the end of the life that has the scars
[01:56:18] and the scraggly beard but has been
[01:56:20] through [ __ ] and has done things and has
[01:56:22] and has realized their potential. What
[01:56:24] would you do to maximize the likelihood
[01:56:26] that you become that savage hero? Would
[01:56:30] you give them the padded lifestyle?
[01:56:32] Would you give them the immediate win?
[01:56:33] Would you give them the easy life?
[01:56:36] Probably not. You would probably put you
[01:56:39] through what you're going through right
[01:56:41] now to become that person. And so, why
[01:56:44] would you resent the chapter you're in?
[01:56:46] Because it's a requirement for becoming
[01:56:48] who you say you want to be. Let's say
[01:56:50] you've gotten over your little demon
[01:56:52] thing. And when I say gotten over, you
[01:56:54] just stop giving it power by saying it
[01:56:55] now is the reason that you can't be
[01:56:57] successful. Awesome. So, what do you do
[01:56:59] now? Right? So, you got to start
[01:57:01] figuring things out. And that figure it
[01:57:03] out muscle is probably the most powerful
[01:57:04] muscle you can build. It's just saying,
[01:57:05] "Oh, I don't know how to do this. I will
[01:57:07] figure it out." Why? Because I figured
[01:57:08] out things in the past and I can do it
[01:57:09] again. And if that person can do it and
[01:57:10] they're no smarter than I am, they have
[01:57:11] two hands in a brain. I can do it, too.
[01:57:13] So, the next time that you say you can't
[01:57:15] figure something out, just set a timer
[01:57:17] for 20 hours and actually try for 20
[01:57:19] hours before you quit. What you'll often
[01:57:22] realize is it's not hard. You just
[01:57:23] haven't even tried yet. If you can
[01:57:24] shrink the time between saying you want
[01:57:26] to learn something and beginning to try
[01:57:28] the thing and extend the time before you
[01:57:30] say, "Hey, this is hard, then you will
[01:57:33] be able to accomplish way more than you
[01:57:35] think." You can learn most things in 20
[01:57:37] hours. The problem is that most people
[01:57:38] delay the first 20 hours by years. And
[01:57:40] if you really measured yourself by the
[01:57:42] amount of action you take, not your
[01:57:44] desire, not your deservingness, or even
[01:57:46] your effort, you might actually be
[01:57:48] embarrassed because what you're looking
[01:57:49] at is reality. It's about what you do,
[01:57:51] not what you say you're going to do, how
[01:57:53] much you want the outcome from what
[01:57:55] you're doing, how much you think you
[01:57:56] deserve the thing that's going to happen
[01:57:58] after you do it, or how hard you try.
[01:58:00] Because one, no one cares. Two, reality
[01:58:02] doesn't care either, because the only
[01:58:03] thing that matters that you can control
[01:58:05] is input. And you would be absolutely
[01:58:07] astonished at what you can accomplish
[01:58:09] when you give yourself no choice. Every
[01:58:11] third time I do a Q&A, I get asked the
[01:58:14] question, "What keeps you going when
[01:58:16] things were tough? Like, what did you
[01:58:17] think about?" and I could come up with
[01:58:20] something that was really compelling.
[01:58:22] But the honest truth is I just never
[01:58:24] considered quitting. It was just not it
[01:58:26] was just not on my choice of options at
[01:58:28] the table because for me the idea of
[01:58:31] going back to Baltimore as a failure was
[01:58:33] so much worse than anything else that I
[01:58:36] could encounter that it just it just
[01:58:39] wasn't even a consideration. And so the
[01:58:41] only natural option I had was to
[01:58:42] persist, was to endure, was to continue.
[01:58:45] And so I think if you use that frame as
[01:58:48] there have been people who have gone
[01:58:50] through significantly worse than what
[01:58:51] I'm going through right now. And for
[01:58:53] those of you who claim the demon card of
[01:58:54] like I've been through [ __ ] then prove
[01:58:56] it. Was it worse than this? Great. Then
[01:58:59] you can prove that it was so hard by
[01:59:01] being hard now. Across time frames in
[01:59:04] history, across countries, across
[01:59:06] cultures, across age groups, across
[01:59:08] race, gender, everyone respects the man
[01:59:13] who works. Because as men we are always
[01:59:15] judged by what we can do and if you are
[01:59:18] doing things then people know that you
[01:59:20] are contributing that is how you prove
[01:59:22] utility. Work ethic is the currency of
[01:59:24] respect. If you want to earn respect you
[01:59:26] earn it through work and sometimes
[01:59:28] that's working on yourself that's
[01:59:30] sometimes working on a skill working on
[01:59:31] a product but it is all through work
[01:59:33] through effort. I will tell you
[01:59:34] something that shifted my life which is
[01:59:35] that entrepreneurship is not a game of
[01:59:37] best man wins. It's a game of last man
[01:59:39] standing. And there's a lot of games
[01:59:42] that are like this. And fundamentally,
[01:59:43] that's an infinite game frame versus a
[01:59:46] finite game frame. And I will read you
[01:59:48] the quote that Ila had framed and put in
[01:59:50] my office. Ask the girl, shoot the shot,
[01:59:53] launch the business, run the ad, quit
[01:59:56] the job, take the risk. Because when
[01:59:57] you're 85 years old and on your
[01:59:59] deathbed, you're not going to wish you
[02:00:00] had fewer crazy stories. The fastest way
[02:00:02] to become confident is to build
[02:00:03] evidence. Build yourself a stack of
[02:00:05] undeniable proof that you are who you
[02:00:07] say you are. Here's exactly how to do
[02:00:09] that. This is brutally honest advice to
[02:00:11] my younger, less confident self. Having
[02:00:14] an epic story is about asking the girl.
[02:00:16] It's about shooting the shot. It's about
[02:00:17] launching the business, about running
[02:00:18] the ad, about knocking on the door,
[02:00:20] quitting the job, taking the risk.
[02:00:22] [music] When you're 85 years old and on
[02:00:23] your deathbed, you're not going to wish
[02:00:24] you had fewer crazy stories. You're
[02:00:26] going to wish you had taken more shots.
[02:00:27] Don't build confidence. Build evidence.
[02:00:29] [music] Confidence comes as a result of
[02:00:31] evidence, not the other way around.
[02:00:34] Confidence without evidence [music] is a
[02:00:36] delusion. It's you beating your chest,
[02:00:38] looking at yourself in the mirror,
[02:00:39] trying to pretend you're something
[02:00:40] you're not. Do it so you get the
[02:00:41] confidence, but don't think you need
[02:00:43] confidence to do it. So, the whole idea
[02:00:45] of fake it until you make it should
[02:00:47] switch to walk it before you talk it,
[02:00:49] right? Prove it to yourself so you don't
[02:00:51] need to prove it to other people and let
[02:00:52] your path to your talking [music] for
[02:00:54] you. Until you win, effort always goes
[02:00:56] unnoticed. Get used to it. If you aren't
[02:00:58] willing to suck, you're never going to
[02:01:00] get good. Losers stay losers because
[02:01:03] they aren't willing to lose. Confidence
[02:01:05] is also domain specific. So you can be
[02:01:07] really good at public presentations and
[02:01:09] really bad at talking to girls. It takes
[02:01:11] a lot for a skill to transfer between
[02:01:12] domains. And so if you want to get good
[02:01:14] at the thing, don't try and do something
[02:01:15] to the left of it. Just do the [music]
[02:01:17] thing. The first sales consult I ever
[02:01:19] took. I didn't close. And I say that
[02:01:22] because everyone just imagines that Mosy
[02:01:24] just came in just slinging credit cards
[02:01:26] and stacking bodies, right? It didn't
[02:01:28] work that way. I came in, it was a
[02:01:30] 5-minute conversation. The girl was
[02:01:31] like, "I need to go get my card from
[02:01:33] home." home and I said, "Oh yeah, okay,
[02:01:34] go do that." And she walked away and I
[02:01:36] went to my boss. He's like, "How'd it
[02:01:37] go?" I said, "Oh, I closed her." And he
[02:01:39] was like, "Oh, that's awesome." He's
[02:01:40] like, "You got the credit card?" I said,
[02:01:41] "Oh, no. She's going to come back with
[02:01:42] the card." And he literally stopped what
[02:01:45] he was doing with six other guys around
[02:01:47] him and they all non-stop laugh a minute
[02:01:51] straight. Like they couldn't breathe cuz
[02:01:53] they thought how stupid what I had just
[02:01:54] said was. But I had no idea. And so that
[02:01:57] was my first ever experience in sales.
[02:01:59] I'm known for sales now. And I wouldn't
[02:02:02] even say I'm confident in sales. It's
[02:02:04] just more like this is what works and
[02:02:06] [music] has worked for me. Take it or
[02:02:08] leave it. And so people perceive that as
[02:02:10] confidence, but it's simply just based
[02:02:12] on experience. And confidence comes from
[02:02:15] experience. [music] What it really is is
[02:02:17] a prediction. What you think is going to
[02:02:19] happen will happen. And so even in
[02:02:21] statistics, what is your confidence
[02:02:22] metric? This is 7.8. It's literally just
[02:02:25] what the percentage likelihood that what
[02:02:26] you think is going to happen is going to
[02:02:28] happen. And so, how do you increase the
[02:02:29] likelihood that what you think is going
[02:02:30] to happen is going to happen? Have it
[02:02:32] have happened already. I could have
[02:02:33] either spent [music]
[02:02:35] 30 minutes every day looking at myself
[02:02:36] in the mirror and telling myself I was
[02:02:37] going to be a great sales guy, or I
[02:02:38] could have reviewed the [ __ ] script.
[02:02:40] Which one do you think would get make me
[02:02:41] a better salesperson? Reviewing the
[02:02:43] script. You can take all the time that
[02:02:44] you're trying to spend psyching yourself
[02:02:46] up and you'll feel significantly more
[02:02:48] confident [music] not having done that
[02:02:49] and simply knowing what you're going to
[02:02:50] say, which you get from practice. The
[02:02:52] world belongs to those who can keep
[02:02:54] doing without seeing the result of their
[02:02:56] doing. And the longer you can wait to
[02:02:58] see the result of your doing while still
[02:02:59] continuing to do is the extent to which
[02:03:02] you can win big in life. For example, to
[02:03:04] be a top 1% podcaster, you have to
[02:03:06] upload 21 podcasts. 21. Top 1%. 90% of
[02:03:11] people don't get past one. 9% don't get
[02:03:14] past 20. [music] And then 1% of
[02:03:17] podcasters of all of them make it to 21
[02:03:19] plus. So when people say try harder, it
[02:03:22] usually just means don't give up. The
[02:03:23] price for excellence has never been so
[02:03:25] low. People give up so easily now that
[02:03:28] it's just so easy to win by [music] just
[02:03:31] being willing to post 20 times. You're
[02:03:34] in the top 1%. Like I'm at the top 1%.
[02:03:36] We're not even talking 10. Top half. Top
[02:03:39] 1%. People are so afraid of being
[02:03:43] humiliated. They get the long-term
[02:03:45] humiliation of never amounting to
[02:03:47] anything. No one's going to watch your
[02:03:48] first 20 episodes anyways. And even if
[02:03:50] they do, it doesn't matter because
[02:03:52] that's not what you're building towards.
[02:03:54] Like you posting those 20 isn't what you
[02:03:56] judge yourself on. You should be judging
[02:03:57] yourself on the difference between your
[02:03:58] first one and your 20th one. Are you
[02:04:00] better? Probably. And the difference
[02:04:02] between your 20th one and your hundth
[02:04:03] one because the win is you. You are the
[02:04:06] asset you're building, not the downloads
[02:04:09] that you get on your first shot. Mosy
[02:04:11] immediately had a podcast with millions
[02:04:13] of downloads every single month.
[02:04:14] >> [music]
[02:04:15] >> No, I spent 4 and a half years making
[02:04:18] two podcasts a week straight. Didn't
[02:04:20] miss. And guess how many podcast
[02:04:22] downloads I was getting per month at the
[02:04:23] end of that? 2 to 3,000 downloads a
[02:04:25] month. Not a lot. I used to think to
[02:04:28] myself, okay, well, each one of these
[02:04:29] podcasts gets like 200 downloads. Well,
[02:04:32] 200 downloads is like an auditorium of
[02:04:34] people. And so, would I feel okay giving
[02:04:36] a speech to 200 people? Yeah. And even
[02:04:39] before that, when they was getting like
[02:04:40] 10 or 15 downloads per episode, if I had
[02:04:42] a little lunch and learn that I would I
[02:04:44] used to have to do to like get leads for
[02:04:46] a business, I'd be fine talking to a
[02:04:48] group of 10 or 15 people because the
[02:04:49] reality is that those people are doing
[02:04:50] me more of a favor than I'm doing them.
[02:04:52] They're literally giving me their ears
[02:04:54] so that I can practice my voice and how
[02:04:56] to talk and how to present. And it was
[02:04:58] only at year 4 and a half to five when
[02:05:00] things started taking off. And you know
[02:05:01] what the two things that changed are?
[02:05:03] One is I did call it I changed it from
[02:05:05] gym secrets to just the game which was a
[02:05:08] business thing. So it made it more
[02:05:09] applicable to more people. And the
[02:05:10] second thing and here's the real one is
[02:05:12] that I sold a company for $46 million.
[02:05:14] And so people are like oh what does this
[02:05:16] guy have to say? And the big thing that
[02:05:18] everyone misses is people try and
[02:05:19] dissect my content. The message is 10%
[02:05:23] of how people consume it. 90% [music] is
[02:05:25] the context around the message. So Elon
[02:05:28] Musk can tweet on the toilet and be
[02:05:30] like, "I'm on the throne taking a shit."
[02:05:32] And it'll get a million likes. [music]
[02:05:34] Why? Because it's Elon Musk. He's the
[02:05:36] richest man in the world and owns three
[02:05:37] of the biggest companies that are most
[02:05:38] innovative of all time. I don't kid
[02:05:40] myself and think that like my content is
[02:05:42] so much better than other people.
[02:05:43] There's plenty of people with better
[02:05:44] content than me that don't get the same
[02:05:45] views. And the reason is [music] because
[02:05:46] they don't have the context. They don't
[02:05:48] have the proof. And solve for the proof.
[02:05:50] And then the content will take care of
[02:05:51] itself. Because one, you will know what
[02:05:54] you're talking about because you have
[02:05:55] proof that you know what you're talking
[02:05:56] about. and people will believe you.
[02:05:59] Which is why you should solve for
[02:06:00] evidence above everything else. Like
[02:06:02] evidence gives you the confidence. If
[02:06:04] someone says, "Alex, I don't think you
[02:06:05] know [ __ ] about business." I'd be like,
[02:06:06] "Okay." It doesn't really affect me. I
[02:06:08] do know we crossed $100 million in net
[02:06:09] worth at age 32. I know that. But if
[02:06:11] someone said that to you and you haven't
[02:06:13] accomplished anything, you don't have
[02:06:15] anything to stand back on and it hurts
[02:06:16] you more. But I have proof. So it's like
[02:06:18] you can just deflect it towards the
[02:06:20] proof and keep living your life. The
[02:06:21] secret to longevity is, especially in
[02:06:23] the content game, but really in any game
[02:06:24] that you're trying to at least help
[02:06:25] other people with, is that if you've
[02:06:28] done the thing, you can be certain
[02:06:30] rather than confident. Be certain based
[02:06:32] on what you've done, not based on what
[02:06:33] you say other people should do. There
[02:06:35] used to be too big to fail. And I think
[02:06:37] there's an alternative, which is too
[02:06:38] good to fail. If you make your stuff so
[02:06:40] [ __ ] good that only one person who
[02:06:42] gets exposed to it sends it to somebody
[02:06:43] else, then you have nothing to worry
[02:06:45] about and you will eventually get
[02:06:46] discovered. It's a time [music] game.
[02:06:48] And in the meanwhile, you just keep
[02:06:50] getting better, which is the point,
[02:06:52] because at the end of the day, you're
[02:06:53] going to die. Everyone's going to forget
[02:06:54] about you anyways. [music] And so, you
[02:06:56] might as well just work on the one asset
[02:06:57] that you get to keep for the rest of
[02:06:58] your life, which is you. And rather than
[02:06:59] measuring yourself based on how many
[02:07:02] views he gets versus how many views you
[02:07:03] get, measure yourself by how much work
[02:07:05] he puts into one of his shorts versus
[02:07:07] what you put into one of your shorts.
[02:07:09] And then you might think the output is
[02:07:10] more reasonable. And if there's a top
[02:07:12] sales guy in your organization who's
[02:07:13] making more money than you, compare not
[02:07:15] what his commission check is to yours
[02:07:17] every month, compare how many calls he's
[02:07:19] making, how many times he practices the
[02:07:21] script, how many calls he's made before
[02:07:22] you, how many sales he's closed before
[02:07:24] you, what time a day he shows up at
[02:07:26] work, what time a day he leaves, whether
[02:07:28] he works weekends or not, whether he's
[02:07:30] willing to hop on the phone in a family
[02:07:32] context so they can still close the
[02:07:33] deal. If you're doing all the inputs,
[02:07:35] the m the outputs will always match on a
[02:07:37] long enough time horizon. And if you are
[02:07:39] new to the game, then my recommendation
[02:07:41] is not only to match inputs, but to
[02:07:43] double or triple the inputs that someone
[02:07:45] ahead of you is doing. And the reason
[02:07:46] you do that is because if you just match
[02:07:48] your inputs, then you're always going to
[02:07:49] be behind them because they're already
[02:07:51] ahead of you because they're better than
[02:07:52] you. And so if you both do the same
[02:07:53] amount of work, they're going to keep
[02:07:54] getting better and so are you. So you
[02:07:55] have to do twice the work. You got to be
[02:07:57] like Kobe, right? Where everyone else is
[02:07:58] doing one practice a day, you do two
[02:08:00] practices a day. And in the beginning,
[02:08:01] they'll be better than you and then
[02:08:02] you'll match them. But because you're
[02:08:03] doing twice the work, eventually you'll
[02:08:05] get better and then that's how you win.
[02:08:06] Yeah. Again, one of the biggest
[02:08:07] misnomers in in whatever endeavor you're
[02:08:09] trying to track is people track the
[02:08:10] wrong metrics. They track the lagging
[02:08:12] metrics rather than the leading [snorts]
[02:08:13] metrics. Lagging metrics are what
[02:08:15] happen. Those are the outputs. And if
[02:08:16] you want to track those, fine. [music]
[02:08:18] But the real things to track are what
[02:08:20] you're doing to create the outputs. So,
[02:08:22] I don't want to necessarily even track
[02:08:23] sales. I want to track how many calls
[02:08:25] I'm making. If I'm trying to get in
[02:08:27] shape, I'm not necessarily going to
[02:08:28] track the weight I'm doing. I'm going to
[02:08:29] track how many calories I'm eating. And
[02:08:31] so, the more ways you measure, the more
[02:08:33] ways you can win. [music] And so the
[02:08:34] idea, the ultimate win at life is where
[02:08:37] you can shift things that are out of
[02:08:39] your control that you deem winning to
[02:08:41] things that are under your control which
[02:08:42] you can deem winning. Because if you're
[02:08:44] measuring on whether you lost the fat or
[02:08:46] not, sometimes people take longer, some
[02:08:48] people don't. That's something that you
[02:08:49] actually can't control. What you can
[02:08:51] control are the inputs. And so if you
[02:08:53] say based on this, if I do this one
[02:08:55] thing every day for a long enough period
[02:08:56] of time, I'll eventually get there. the
[02:08:58] real winners. Cut out the I'll
[02:09:00] eventually get there and say if I do
[02:09:02] this every day, I have won. The thing
[02:09:04] that I try and focus on now is the delta
[02:09:06] between how hard I tried and how hard I
[02:09:08] can possibly try. And if I know that the
[02:09:11] gap between those two is zero, then I
[02:09:13] have won. [music] And I've decided to
[02:09:15] spend a inordinate amount of effort
[02:09:17] trying to make that my definition of
[02:09:19] winning is that there's nothing left in
[02:09:21] the tank. If you get into a harder
[02:09:23] career path or one that takes more reps
[02:09:25] to get good at or more reps to get into,
[02:09:27] then every day you can win based on
[02:09:30] saying like everyone else does 100, I do
[02:09:32] 250 and I have nothing left to give. I
[02:09:35] won and that should satisfy you. And if
[02:09:37] [music] you're if you're obsessive on
[02:09:38] the external thing, that takes too long
[02:09:41] and you will give up too soon. One of
[02:09:43] the things that took me too long to
[02:09:44] learn was the difference between the
[02:09:45] finite and infinite [music] frame. And
[02:09:46] so finite frame is where you have known
[02:09:49] players, agreed upon rules, and a way to
[02:09:51] [music] win or lose at the end. And then
[02:09:53] the game is over. Infinite frame, you
[02:09:55] have known and unknown players, no
[02:09:57] agreed upon rules, and the point of the
[02:09:58] game is to [music] keep the game going.
[02:09:59] And all the greatest games that I've
[02:10:01] ever participated in, marriage, health,
[02:10:03] business, you don't win at marriage.
[02:10:06] [music] The point is to stay married.
[02:10:07] You don't win at health. The point is to
[02:10:09] stay in shape. You don't win at
[02:10:11] business. The point is to stay in
[02:10:13] business. [music]
[02:10:14] And so by default, if you don't give up,
[02:10:18] you win. And [music] so that's the big
[02:10:20] frame shift, which is why leaving
[02:10:22] everything on the field is the way you
[02:10:23] have to define winning if you want to
[02:10:24] win in the long term. And anything worth
[02:10:26] doing [music]
[02:10:27] takes great time. If you stick with it
[02:10:29] and you make that the win, you'll notice
[02:10:31] that the external win will just happen
[02:10:33] on its own. And if you really commit to
[02:10:36] that perspective, it won't even mean
[02:10:38] much to you. Because if you make that
[02:10:40] everything, it's the same thing with the
[02:10:41] guys who win the golds and then kill
[02:10:43] themselves or win the championship and
[02:10:44] then go into these massive depressions.
[02:10:46] It's because they're playing the wrong
[02:10:47] game. When Kobe was asked shortly before
[02:10:49] he died like, "Do you think that you're
[02:10:51] somebody who's afraid of losing or do
[02:10:52] you think you're somebody who loves
[02:10:54] winning?" He basically denied both
[02:10:55] frames. He said, I'm paraphrasing, "I
[02:10:57] just love playing to the best of my
[02:10:59] ability." And that's what he measures
[02:11:01] himself off of. The fact that the world
[02:11:03] chooses to measure him on the fact that
[02:11:05] he's won so many games. That's the
[02:11:06] [music] world's problem,
[02:11:08] not ours. It's saying I'm game master,
[02:11:11] not a player, and I choose to play by
[02:11:13] these rules. And as long as I am
[02:11:15] playing, I win by default. And it's cuz
[02:11:17] I'm not accepting the world's rules for
[02:11:19] winning. I make my own. An easier
[02:11:20] analogy here is, and this is a Naval
[02:11:22] Ravicon quote, [music] he said, "What
[02:11:24] looks like work to other people should
[02:11:25] feel like play for you." If you look at
[02:11:27] an artist and he's painting, you're
[02:11:29] like, "Hey, how soon are you going to
[02:11:30] finish that painting?" The point for the
[02:11:32] artist is to paint. [music] He'll finish
[02:11:34] that piece and he'll start the next one.
[02:11:36] But the process of painting is the thing
[02:11:38] that they enjoy. And so the idea is that
[02:11:40] if you can commit and the broader you
[02:11:42] can generalize what you're committing
[02:11:43] to, the easier it will be to stick with
[02:11:45] it. So you might be like, I love making
[02:11:47] calls, but I hate entering things in the
[02:11:49] CRM. Well, both of those are required
[02:11:51] for the role of sales. And so I prefer
[02:11:53] to chunk up a level and say, I prefer to
[02:11:56] do hard work because of what that work
[02:11:58] does to me. Then whether I'm putting
[02:12:00] [ __ ] into the CRM or editing a document
[02:12:02] or having a hard conversation, all of
[02:12:04] those things are difficult and I see
[02:12:06] those as all contributing to the person
[02:12:07] I ultimately want to be until eventually
[02:12:09] I die and it won't matter anyways. And
[02:12:11] so the only asset that you really get to
[02:12:12] keep with you is your character and
[02:12:14] that's the only thing you keep building.
[02:12:15] And so if you make the character the W
[02:12:18] at the end of the day, did or I did I
[02:12:20] not contribute to the character of the
[02:12:21] person that I want to become? If that's
[02:12:23] the W every day, you can never lose. If
[02:12:26] you have your menu option of things that
[02:12:28] you can do in life, just remove quitting
[02:12:30] as one of them and then try your next
[02:12:31] idea. And if you are in that rocky cut
[02:12:33] scene and you're two [music] months in,
[02:12:36] three months in, remember that the rocky
[02:12:38] cut scene in the movie lasts a couple
[02:12:39] seconds and the rocky cut scene in real
[02:12:42] life might last a few years. [music] And
[02:12:43] so whenever I get to a low point where I
[02:12:45] think, why do I even bother doing this?
[02:12:47] I just like to remind myself this is
[02:12:49] where most people stop and [music] this
[02:12:51] is why they don't win. And as hard as
[02:12:52] this is going to sound, the best thing
[02:12:54] that I ever did was not listen to other
[02:12:56] people's opinions about my life. They
[02:12:58] don't want the best version of you.
[02:13:00] [music] They want the version of you who
[02:13:02] best serves them. And unfortunately, the
[02:13:06] closer people are to you, the more
[02:13:07] similarly they'll see themselves and
[02:13:09] you. And the more your success will make
[02:13:12] them feel bad about themselves. And I
[02:13:13] can promise you this from somebody who
[02:13:15] might be a little further. [music] I
[02:13:16] have more people who root for me now
[02:13:18] that I've already won than people who
[02:13:19] rooted for me along the way. No one is
[02:13:21] doing as well as you think they're
[02:13:23] doing. So by comparison, everyone is
[02:13:26] better off than they think because the
[02:13:28] cumulative median visually is probably
[02:13:31] three times higher than what the actual
[02:13:33] median is. And so if you're like, "Oh,
[02:13:35] I'm average or slightly below average
[02:13:37] compared to the perceived median of
[02:13:39] society. You're probably way above
[02:13:40] average." And that's okay. And being
[02:13:44] above or below average doesn't even
[02:13:45] matter anyways because [music]
[02:13:47] you've got a lot of innings left.
[02:13:49] there's a lot of quarters left to play.
[02:13:51] And so like until the day you die, you
[02:13:54] still have hope. You still have a
[02:13:55] chance. You can still keep moving
[02:13:56] forward. Whenever someone gives you your
[02:13:57] their opinion about what you should do
[02:13:58] with their your life, it's really them
[02:14:00] saying, "This is my preference of how I
[02:14:02] want to live my life." [music] And I
[02:14:04] say, "Great. Live your life that way and
[02:14:05] I'll live my life this way." Because me
[02:14:08] living my life has no effect on you. So
[02:14:10] live your life the way you want to live
[02:14:11] it. And I don't want your life either.
[02:14:13] They state make those statements because
[02:14:15] they feel uncomfortable and so they have
[02:14:18] to like release it and so they say that
[02:14:20] to you to make themselves feel better
[02:14:22] and that's their problem not yours.
[02:14:23] [music] I think I've learned a lot of
[02:14:25] frames around not caring about others
[02:14:27] people's opinions be out of necessity
[02:14:29] because I was so crippled by the
[02:14:31] opinions of other [music] people for
[02:14:32] what felt like such a long time that I
[02:14:35] always had to face my death in order to
[02:14:37] get myself to move. And so I talk about
[02:14:38] death a lot because it has actually been
[02:14:40] one of the few things that actually
[02:14:41] motivates me to change my behavior. And
[02:14:43] so when I had done all the things that I
[02:14:45] thought would impress other people, one,
[02:14:48] I realized that they didn't really care.
[02:14:49] [music] And secondly, I realized that I
[02:14:52] deeply cared about how much I hated my
[02:14:53] life. When I was like, is this what
[02:14:55] winning feels like? Because if this is
[02:14:57] what winning is, then I don't want to
[02:14:58] play. By thinking, I'd rather be dead
[02:15:01] than continue to play this game. I was
[02:15:03] forced to change the game I was playing,
[02:15:04] which is like, well, what is a game that
[02:15:06] I would like to win at? Well, I'd like
[02:15:08] to win a game that [music] is by rules
[02:15:10] that I set out and there are things that
[02:15:11] I can control. And then those people
[02:15:14] because you break their mold of what
[02:15:15] they're supposed to be doing and they
[02:15:16] might be miserable, too, but they are
[02:15:18] not willing to take the risk that you're
[02:15:19] willing to take because they care about
[02:15:20] other people's opinions more than you do
[02:15:22] because they haven't gone through that
[02:15:23] little journey that you just went
[02:15:24] through. Fine. [music] You do it your
[02:15:26] way. They do it their way. I mean, I
[02:15:28] went from prodigal son, my father's
[02:15:29] super proud of me, graduating Vanderbilt
[02:15:31] in three years, president of the
[02:15:32] fraternity, vice president of the
[02:15:33] powerlifting team, management
[02:15:34] consultant, [music] to a minimum wage
[02:15:37] employee. Like, that's a pretty
[02:15:38] significant drop in status. I have these
[02:15:40] frames because [music] people will say
[02:15:42] whatever they want, but for me, that
[02:15:43] relative drop in status was a lot. I
[02:15:46] went from about as high status as you
[02:15:47] can get in a as a 22-year-old to about
[02:15:51] as low status as you can get. I mean, I
[02:15:52] remember having people be like, "So, did
[02:15:54] you go to college?" And I was like,
[02:15:56] "Yeah, I went to college and I [ __ ]
[02:15:58] murdered it and I did everything." And
[02:16:00] the cuz the implied question is, "Why
[02:16:01] are you here?" And so that's what in the
[02:16:04] beginning hurt a ton. But then I just
[02:16:06] realized that they just didn't know and
[02:16:08] they were asking [music] genuinely. And
[02:16:09] all of my judgment around that was just
[02:16:11] my own problem. How I'm perceiving this
[02:16:13] question is affecting my mood to such a
[02:16:15] great degree. What if I applied this to
[02:16:17] every question? All these people are
[02:16:18] asking me things and I'm either getting
[02:16:20] offended or getting complimented, but
[02:16:21] the statement doesn't change. So that
[02:16:23] sounds like a me problem. [music] And so
[02:16:24] the more I started diving into things
[02:16:26] like that, the less bothered I became by
[02:16:28] other everyone else's opinion because
[02:16:30] they also have no context. [music] Even
[02:16:31] if they did mean it as an insult, so
[02:16:34] what if they're saying, "Well, I'm
[02:16:35] better than you." I'd be like, "Yes, you
[02:16:37] are." A lot of even really successful
[02:16:39] people frame their success around trying
[02:16:41] to prove someone wrong, right? But when
[02:16:43] you try and create your entire existence
[02:16:46] in opposition to someone, you actually
[02:16:47] give them complete control over your
[02:16:49] life. It means that because of the
[02:16:50] things that this person has said, I will
[02:16:51] choose [music] to change all of my
[02:16:52] behavior. Which basically means that the
[02:16:54] directives from that person have
[02:16:56] commanded you to do whatever you do.
[02:16:57] [music] And if you like to be a free
[02:16:59] person and want to be somebody who acts
[02:17:00] of their own valition, then [music] I
[02:17:03] choose to accept insults so that I can
[02:17:06] live my life rather than living in
[02:17:08] contrast to them and giving my control
[02:17:09] to the person who insulted me. I that
[02:17:11] would mean I put me changing your mind
[02:17:14] above my goals, which I don't do. My
[02:17:16] goals are more important to me than
[02:17:17] changing your mind. I'm super sensitive
[02:17:19] to IM statements, labeling statements
[02:17:21] like this. Like, I'm a neat freak. I'm
[02:17:23] the type of person who. So, whenever
[02:17:25] you're dating someone, you're getting to
[02:17:26] know someone, people like to blanket I
[02:17:28] am statements really early on to set the
[02:17:30] stage. Like, I'm this type I'm the type
[02:17:31] of person who likes to show up early. I
[02:17:32] like to clean things. I'm a labeler. I'm
[02:17:34] a whatever. And then, and this is the
[02:17:36] insidious part, they then say because,
[02:17:38] [music] and then they insert a reason
[02:17:40] that they made up or that sounded good
[02:17:42] in the past and people nodded their
[02:17:43] heads and agreed [music] with because my
[02:17:46] mom never loved me enough. because I
[02:17:48] didn't get enough hugs, because I gave a
[02:17:50] speech once and everyone laughed at me.
[02:17:52] [music] Because you don't know. And the
[02:17:54] reality is you will never know. All we
[02:17:56] know is that you do a certain type of
[02:17:58] behavior. That's it. [music] By giving
[02:18:00] these because statements all this power,
[02:18:02] you actually put all the power into
[02:18:04] something that is unchangeable in the
[02:18:05] past and so you have to keep dealing
[02:18:07] with it. Whereas, if you just said, I do
[02:18:09] these things period. Now, if I want to
[02:18:12] change what I do, then I should just
[02:18:13] reward myself in the present for doing
[02:18:14] something different. And that makes it a
[02:18:16] lot more malleable and it makes your
[02:18:17] identity and what you do as a result or
[02:18:19] rather what you do and your identity as
[02:18:21] a result something under your control.
[02:18:23] You don't want to blame the things in
[02:18:24] the past that you can't change. You want
[02:18:25] to blame things in the present that you
[02:18:27] can't. So if you said I have trouble
[02:18:29] getting close to girls because my mom
[02:18:31] and I aren't close one, you give your
[02:18:34] mother all the power in your love life.
[02:18:37] You give power to something that
[02:18:38] happened in the past that you can't
[02:18:39] change [music] to things that are
[02:18:40] happening in the present that you can
[02:18:41] change. And so would it be more useful
[02:18:43] to say in the past I have struggled to
[02:18:46] get close to [music] girls period. Now
[02:18:49] that could be for a number of reasons.
[02:18:51] Thing is is that you don't know what
[02:18:53] reason it is cuz I could say let's say
[02:18:55] imagine all these things happened. You
[02:18:56] struggled with your mom. Let's say you
[02:18:58] had a bad breakup at some point in your
[02:18:59] life. You're not in shape. I could say I
[02:19:02] struggle getting close to girls. And I
[02:19:04] could use any of those three as my
[02:19:06] reasons. But which of those serve me?
[02:19:08] None of them. All we know is that you
[02:19:11] struggle to get close to girls. Okay.
[02:19:13] Well, then just look at what it would
[02:19:15] take to get close to girls and then do
[02:19:17] that rather than having this other thing
[02:19:19] that's attached to the behavior that you
[02:19:21] can't do anything about. It just makes
[02:19:23] changing who you are and what you do a
[02:19:25] lot easier. Sometimes people are such
[02:19:27] douchebags. They will tell a young
[02:19:29] child, "You will never have a successful
[02:19:31] relationship with a woman because you
[02:19:32] don't respect or love me." A [music]
[02:19:34] mother. Or the reverse could be true of
[02:19:36] a father. They're a [ __ ] douchebag
[02:19:37] for saying that because they are
[02:19:40] labeling you with something [music] that
[02:19:41] you can't change. But that's their
[02:19:43] problem. It also is no basis. In fact,
[02:19:46] when people are like, "Look at how the
[02:19:47] son treats the mother. That's how he's
[02:19:49] going to treat his wife." Why the [ __ ]
[02:19:52] would I treat my wife like I treat my
[02:19:53] mother? Dear God, that's just a
[02:19:56] statement that sounds good but has no
[02:19:57] basis in fact. You treat your wife like
[02:19:59] you treat your wife. You treat your
[02:20:00] mother like you treat your mother.
[02:20:01] They're different people. People want to
[02:20:03] have problems because it gives them a
[02:20:05] reason to suck and it be okay. [music]
[02:20:07] It gives them ego padding so they can
[02:20:09] protect themselves for the reason why
[02:20:11] they're not successful, for the reason
[02:20:13] they haven't accomplished what they said
[02:20:14] they were going to accomplish. And so
[02:20:16] they lean on their potential, and their
[02:20:18] trauma as the two reasons that people
[02:20:20] prop up. I've got lots of potential, but
[02:20:22] I have all this trauma. And neither of
[02:20:23] those matter. I've gone through three
[02:20:25] stages of like mental development in
[02:20:27] terms of how I see changing my behavior.
[02:20:29] In the beginning, I attributed my
[02:20:30] behavior to my past traumas. The second
[02:20:33] phase was that I I chose to change the
[02:20:35] story. What if my mother was just trying
[02:20:37] to feel better and it wasn't my fault.
[02:20:39] So then I changed my behavior in that
[02:20:40] sense. The third phase, which is where
[02:20:42] I'm at now, maybe there'll be a fourth
[02:20:43] phase, but the the third phase was I
[02:20:45] behave this way, period. The because
[02:20:47] statement in the second half is
[02:20:48] completely irrelevant. One, because I
[02:20:51] don't know it. Two, because I can't
[02:20:52] change it. So I might as well just
[02:20:53] choose [music] to do the thing that I
[02:20:54] want to do. Irrelevant of my past. The
[02:20:56] single strongest predictor of my
[02:20:57] behavior is what will make the more epic
[02:20:59] story. I've thought about that frame a
[02:21:01] lot and it's still continued to win out.
[02:21:03] And so when I'm forced to [music] make a
[02:21:05] decision between two things, I prefer to
[02:21:08] choose the one that's the more epic
[02:21:09] story because either you have an epic
[02:21:10] story of failure or you have an epic
[02:21:12] story of success. But no 85year-olds are
[02:21:14] regretting their epic stories. They are
[02:21:16] regretting the stories they never told.
[02:21:17] Our minds are meaning-making machines
[02:21:19] and they have to be because they create
[02:21:20] associations between things we know and
[02:21:22] things we don't know. That's how we
[02:21:23] learn. The problem is that our brains
[02:21:25] will make wrong associations and then
[02:21:27] they will plague us for the rest of our
[02:21:28] lives. But we can just redefine what the
[02:21:30] association means for ourel to make our
[02:21:31] lives easier. Because whether you miss
[02:21:33] the game-winning shot when there's a
[02:21:34] huge crowd or you miss it when no one
[02:21:36] else is there, the only reason it hurts
[02:21:38] more is because you choose to let it
[02:21:39] hurt you more. Now, there are things
[02:21:40] that you can do prior to the
[02:21:41] game-winning shot that can increase the
[02:21:42] likelihood that you make it, which is
[02:21:44] that you practice way more in high
[02:21:45] stakes conditions over and over and over
[02:21:47] again. If you do that, it increases the
[02:21:48] likelihood, your confidence that you'll
[02:21:50] be able to make it. Why? Because you've
[02:21:51] made them before. And if you're like,
[02:21:53] well, I missed my first ever
[02:21:54] game-winning shot. Now, what do I
[02:21:55] [music] do? But you practice in every
[02:21:57] other condition that's as close to that
[02:21:58] as you can until eventually you make
[02:21:59] one. And then when you do make one,
[02:22:00] you'll have evidence that you've made
[02:22:01] one and you try and make one again. What
[02:22:03] you probably don't know is that Michael
[02:22:04] Jordan has missed more game-winning
[02:22:06] shots than he has made. But he's
[02:22:07] remembered for the ones that he made.
[02:22:09] But how was he able to make them? By
[02:22:10] missing and being willing to shoot
[02:22:11] again. On that basis of story, the many
[02:22:14] excuses that we give ourselves in
[02:22:15] reverse can make a more epic story. And
[02:22:18] so rather than say like these are all
[02:22:20] the reasons that I can't succeed, I
[02:22:22] think reframing that as these are all
[02:22:24] the reasons that when I succeed it'll be
[02:22:25] an even better story and it'll be more
[02:22:28] inspiring to other people is a much more
[02:22:29] powerful frame. The more disadvantages
[02:22:31] you have when you start, the more epic
[02:22:32] story you have when you win. Donald
[02:22:34] Miller has one of the most powerful
[02:22:35] frames of [music] heroes and villains
[02:22:36] I've ever heard of. Heroes and villains
[02:22:38] always have the same backstory. It's
[02:22:40] pain. They're always an orphan, right?
[02:22:42] Or [music] the the villain has some sort
[02:22:44] of disfigurement to show that they went
[02:22:46] through hard times. The difference is
[02:22:48] what the character chooses to do about
[02:22:50] it. Villains say, "The world hurt me.
[02:22:53] I'm going to hurt it back." Heroes say,
[02:22:55] "The world hurt me. [music] I'm not
[02:22:57] going to let anyone else hurt this way."
[02:22:58] So, heroes use pain. Villains are used
[02:23:01] by it. [music] And so, I think all of us
[02:23:03] have the choice to become our own
[02:23:04] heroes, our own villains in our own life
[02:23:06] simply by how we choose to deal with the
[02:23:08] pain that we all inevitably experience.
[02:23:10] So, pain is a constant. [music]
[02:23:12] The choice about how we react to it is
[02:23:14] the thing that dictates the path of our
[02:23:16] lives. You know, there there are certain
[02:23:18] rules of playing the game that have
[02:23:19] served me really well. One of them is,
[02:23:22] [music] and that's okay. And I probably
[02:23:25] use that frame more than anything else,
[02:23:28] which is I'm not close with XYZ
[02:23:32] relative, [music] your parent, your mom,
[02:23:34] your sister, your brother. And that's
[02:23:36] okay. I spent a lot of my mental effort
[02:23:39] trying to untangle stories [music] that
[02:23:40] I told in the past about things that
[02:23:42] were my fault or were a problem. And the
[02:23:44] easiest way that I found to solve
[02:23:45] problems is to decide they're not
[02:23:46] problems to begin with. I have a handful
[02:23:48] of pictures that I took for the first 5
[02:23:51] [music] years of sucking during
[02:23:52] business. And I use those pictures all
[02:23:55] the time, every day. [music] And the
[02:23:58] zillions of pictures after I became
[02:24:01] successful, I barely use any of them.
[02:24:03] The time to document your life is when
[02:24:05] it [music] sucks, not when it's great.
[02:24:07] Because those are the stories that
[02:24:09] you're going to tell. And those are
[02:24:10] going to be the reminders that you use
[02:24:12] in the present day of things that you
[02:24:14] have been through and proof as to who
[02:24:16] you really are. Because my favorite line
[02:24:17] in the matrix [music] is in the second
[02:24:20] or third matrix when Morpheus is
[02:24:22] standing on the hill and he's looking
[02:24:24] out towards everyone. And he said, "I
[02:24:25] stand here truthfully unafraid, [music]
[02:24:28] not because of the path that lies before
[02:24:29] me, but because of the path that lies
[02:24:31] behind me." And so the struggle period
[02:24:33] that you may be in right now is the path
[02:24:36] behind your future self that you are
[02:24:38] building. so that that man or that woman
[02:24:40] can stand on the pulpit and look at you
[02:24:42] straight dead in the eyes in the mirror
[02:24:44] and say, "I am confident [music]
[02:24:46] and I stand truthfully here unafraid,
[02:24:48] not because of what I said my goal is
[02:24:49] going to be, but because [music] what
[02:24:50] I've been through to get here." And so,
[02:24:52] here's my advice to my younger self.
[02:24:54] Document your life more. [music]
[02:24:55] Otherwise, you'll forget the details.
[02:24:57] And the details are what make it worth
[02:24:59] remembering. It's the times you're
[02:25:00] sleeping on the floor. It's the time the
[02:25:02] person walks out and you miss the
[02:25:03] seventh sale that day. It's the time
[02:25:05] when your bank account's at its absolute
[02:25:06] lowest. [music] It's when your car
[02:25:07] breaks down on the side of the road and
[02:25:09] you're like, "What am I going to do now?
[02:25:10] I can barely afford this." Right? Those
[02:25:11] are the moments, the ones that you want
[02:25:13] to ignore, the ones that you want to
[02:25:14] look away from, that are the ones that
[02:25:15] you need to capture because those are
[02:25:16] the moments that you will tell in the
[02:25:18] future of things you got through.
[02:25:20] Because no heroes are heroes without
[02:25:22] epic monsters. And the bigger the
[02:25:24] monster, the greater the hero. When I
[02:25:25] was poor, I didn't need motivation. I
[02:25:27] needed someone to give me tactical
[02:25:28] advice. If I could talk to my younger
[02:25:31] poorer self, this is what I would say.
[02:25:33] This is more brutally honest advice to
[02:25:35] my younger poorer self. This advice is
[02:25:36] only for somebody who wants to make more
[02:25:38] money growing their business, growing
[02:25:40] themselves. People obsessed with their
[02:25:41] morning routines make less money than
[02:25:43] people obsessed with making money.
[02:25:44] People [music] work, sacrifice, and then
[02:25:47] they get rich. Then they fill their time
[02:25:48] with weird routines. Then they forget
[02:25:51] how they got rich in the first place.
[02:25:52] And then they tell other people the
[02:25:54] weird routines made them rich rather
[02:25:56] than what they actually did, which is
[02:25:58] whatever it took, not some 3-hour
[02:26:00] morning routine. There was a kid who
[02:26:02] DM'd me who said, "Hey, I've been
[02:26:05] working with this business coach and he
[02:26:07] has me doing a morning routine. Could
[02:26:09] not make this up. After I do my grounded
[02:26:11] walking, I do my gratitude journal. I do
[02:26:14] my [music]
[02:26:15] list for the day. I do my ice plunge."
[02:26:17] He's like, "After I do that, it takes me
[02:26:18] about 3 hours in the morning to get all
[02:26:20] that done." He's like, "I barely have
[02:26:21] any energy to like actually get work
[02:26:22] done." I just said, "I'm going to give
[02:26:24] you the biggest hack in the world. Cut
[02:26:25] the 3-hour morning routine, replace it
[02:26:26] with 3 hours of work, and I promise
[02:26:27] you'll get more done." And he messaged
[02:26:29] me back a week later. He was like,
[02:26:30] "Dude, it changed my whole life. I'm
[02:26:32] getting so much done now." I was like,
[02:26:33] "What a [ __ ] concept. If you work
[02:26:34] more, more gets done." And I love just
[02:26:36] looking at this. It's like, "What
[02:26:37] actions do I have to take to get what I
[02:26:39] want?" Anything that is not that is a
[02:26:41] distraction from it, period. If it takes
[02:26:43] you 5 minutes to feel 20% better, and
[02:26:45] you can actually measure that your
[02:26:46] output goes up by 20%. Then cool, that
[02:26:48] makes sense. So, I'm not I'm not against
[02:26:50] doing things. I'm against doing things
[02:26:52] for the sake of doing them.
[02:26:55] And so one of the biggest issues with
[02:26:57] learning and education as humans do it
[02:26:59] is that we make correlations to things
[02:27:01] that are approximate. They're close to
[02:27:02] one another. Tall people play
[02:27:04] basketball. I should play basketball to
[02:27:05] get tall. We make these very mistaken
[02:27:07] correlations. But we should look at is
[02:27:09] what it took to get there, not what
[02:27:11] they're doing now. So the better advice
[02:27:12] is to look at what someone was doing on
[02:27:14] their way up in the grind. Mirror that
[02:27:16] more than what they're currently doing
[02:27:18] at the top of the mountain. So it would
[02:27:19] be like assuming Warren Buffett is rich
[02:27:20] because he drinks Coke. I drink probably
[02:27:22] 5 12 oz Cokes a day.
[02:27:24] >> All you have to do also on the corlary
[02:27:26] is are there other people who drink Coke
[02:27:27] who aren't rich? I've had probably 10
[02:27:29] different podcasts seed the premise. Do
[02:27:32] you think that the fact that you had a
[02:27:33] hard childhood has created the success
[02:27:36] today? And I would say no. I would say
[02:27:39] the work that I did created the success
[02:27:41] and all we have to do is look at all the
[02:27:43] other people who had bad childhoods who
[02:27:46] aren't successful. And I think there are
[02:27:47] way more of those than there are that
[02:27:48] are to prove that it actually has
[02:27:50] nothing to do with who's successful.
[02:27:52] There's also people who didn't have bad
[02:27:53] childhoods who are successful, too. And
[02:27:55] [music] so it's just that many people
[02:27:57] have bad childhoods. Some of them become
[02:28:00] successful. And so that's why trying to
[02:28:01] figure out why something happened. I
[02:28:03] have spent less and less of my effort
[02:28:05] trying to do that and only look at what
[02:28:08] actions created a result rather than
[02:28:11] looking at intention or anything else
[02:28:13] that's amorphous that can't be measured.
[02:28:16] 30 isn't the new 20. It's an excuse to
[02:28:19] take 10 years longer to accomplish the
[02:28:20] same thing. You can die when you're
[02:28:22] done. Until then, keep going. In your
[02:28:24] 20s, you're young. You can [ __ ] around.
[02:28:27] It doesn't matter cuz life is long.
[02:28:28] Number one, that assumes that you're not
[02:28:30] going to die. If you're in your 30s, you
[02:28:32] know someone in your high school class
[02:28:33] who died. And it's not just the drug
[02:28:34] overdose people. It's the people who got
[02:28:37] shot, got in a car accident, had a weird
[02:28:38] brain cancer. I've had all of those
[02:28:40] things happened to people that I went to
[02:28:41] high school with. In one way, I think
[02:28:43] it's a little bit arrogant to assume
[02:28:44] that you're just going to live because
[02:28:46] it means you can waste your life. And I
[02:28:47] I wholeheartedly stand against that. The
[02:28:49] second translation around that that I
[02:28:51] think has hurt a lot of people is that
[02:28:53] they can do what I would consider
[02:28:55] dead-end jobs. And that [music] means
[02:28:57] jobs that don't have any direct
[02:28:59] correlation to your personal growth. Has
[02:29:01] nothing to do with pay. You can work for
[02:29:03] free and grow more than anyone else.
[02:29:04] This is not saying that you need to go
[02:29:06] into a season of earning in your 20s,
[02:29:08] but you do need to be setting yourself
[02:29:10] up for growth. in my opinion, if you
[02:29:12] want the big ultimate outcome. And so
[02:29:14] most people that at least consume my
[02:29:16] stuff, they want to be better. They want
[02:29:19] to grow. They want to get in better
[02:29:20] shape. They want to have better
[02:29:21] relationships. They want to have a
[02:29:22] better business. They want to be, you
[02:29:23] know, bigger in every way. They want to
[02:29:24] expand. If you spend the decade of your
[02:29:27] [music] 20s not growing and not
[02:29:30] investing in your skills and your
[02:29:31] education, if you do that in your 30s,
[02:29:33] you're going to be further behind than
[02:29:34] someone who starts in their 20s. You're
[02:29:36] going to be a decade behind. You know,
[02:29:37] nowadays there's kids who are starting
[02:29:38] out the entrepreneurial journey when
[02:29:39] they're like 13. And so when they're 23,
[02:29:41] they're Mr. Beast. He's young, but he's
[02:29:44] actually pretty old in business terms
[02:29:46] because a lot of people start their
[02:29:47] business journey in their mid-40s. And
[02:29:48] so if they're 50 years old and started
[02:29:50] their business 5 years ago, Mr. Beast
[02:29:52] has twice the amount of time in the ring
[02:29:54] under the bar that they do. For me, I
[02:29:56] want to start my time clock on paying
[02:29:59] down my ignorance debt as fast as
[02:30:00] humanly possible because the debt is a
[02:30:02] constant for everyone. All of us are
[02:30:03] trying to pay down that debt as fast as
[02:30:05] we can. and taking a decade, arguably
[02:30:07] one of the most productive decades of
[02:30:09] your life, and not paying down that
[02:30:10] debt, you just sit in such a deficit
[02:30:13] compared to your peer group. Some people
[02:30:15] might watch this and be 30 or 40 or 50
[02:30:16] and be like, "Well, [ __ ] I took the
[02:30:18] wrong advice from the wrong guy." Guess
[02:30:20] what? You're going to die. It's not
[02:30:21] going to matter anyways. Big deal.
[02:30:22] Whatever. The best time to do this was
[02:30:24] start when you were 10 and get born to
[02:30:26] an entrepreneurial parent who got you in
[02:30:28] their small business and invested in all
[02:30:29] of your education as a homeschooled
[02:30:31] student and taught you all the ways of
[02:30:32] the of the Jedi.
[02:30:34] But you probably didn't have that. And
[02:30:36] so the second best time is to start now
[02:30:38] because let's play out the alternative.
[02:30:39] How much does it serve you to just say,
[02:30:41] I guess I have no chance. Okay, die.
[02:30:45] There's nothing left for me to do. I
[02:30:47] will relinquish the remainder of my
[02:30:49] living days and years because I choose
[02:30:51] to lose. And that's a choice. And if you
[02:30:53] want that, that's cool. The idea of
[02:30:54] quitting simply because you're older,
[02:30:57] because you didn't do something.
[02:30:58] Everybody doesn't do things that they
[02:31:01] know they should be doing now. And
[02:31:03] that's because you're always going to
[02:31:05] know more in the future than you do in
[02:31:07] the past. And so it's a faulty premise
[02:31:09] to say that I'm not going to take action
[02:31:10] today because I didn't know something in
[02:31:13] the past. Everyone doesn't know anything
[02:31:15] in the past. But all you can do is take
[02:31:16] action with what you know today. And by
[02:31:18] taking action, you have learned. And so
[02:31:20] you actually take one step to making
[02:31:22] your first payment on ignorance debt
[02:31:24] through actions, not [music] words. I
[02:31:26] mean, I think a lot of people know the
[02:31:27] story of the 30-year-old barista. If you
[02:31:29] love that, then do it. You know what I
[02:31:31] mean? Like I have no judgment on what
[02:31:32] you do. If you don't love that and you
[02:31:34] wish you were doing something else,
[02:31:36] that's what I would say I have a problem
[02:31:37] with, which is why are you not doing it?
[02:31:40] And I think diving into that, which is
[02:31:41] usually some sort of fear, some sort of
[02:31:43] anxiety, some sort of label that they
[02:31:45] believed that isn't true from someone
[02:31:47] else, and just trying to zone in on like
[02:31:49] why am I not doing it? And taking two
[02:31:51] steps closer to it, not just like
[02:31:52] because I don't know what I'm doing.
[02:31:53] Well, duh. Okay, neither does anyone.
[02:31:55] What are you doing about that? Just
[02:31:57] defining it to what actions am I going
[02:31:58] to take as a result? Just makes life a
[02:32:00] lot easier. What does figured out mean?
[02:32:01] means that I'm going to read 2 hours a
[02:32:03] night on a specific subject until I feel
[02:32:05] like I can make a decision within 30
[02:32:06] days on what I'm going to do. Great.
[02:32:08] That is something I can do and I can
[02:32:10] measure whether I did it or not.
[02:32:12] You have seasons of earning and you have
[02:32:14] seasons of learning. I had this kid who
[02:32:16] reached out. He was 18 years old. Said
[02:32:17] he was going to edit videos for us. When
[02:32:19] he came in, he said, "I want $100,000 a
[02:32:23] year as an editor as a starting [music]
[02:32:25] job." His reasoning was that somebody
[02:32:28] else had offered him that amount of
[02:32:30] money. I want to make this statement
[02:32:31] because I think it's logical and also
[02:32:33] stupid. If you're optimizing for your
[02:32:35] earning potential in your 20s, you're
[02:32:37] missing the [ __ ] point. [music] This
[02:32:39] individual had the potential to be on a
[02:32:41] team that has a massively globally
[02:32:44] recognized [music] brand in terms of
[02:32:45] media and from there learn how to be way
[02:32:49] better than they currently are and then
[02:32:51] become a creative director at another
[02:32:53] company or at one of my portfolio
[02:32:54] companies. like that is the career path
[02:32:56] and instead was comparing that to
[02:32:58] something that he would make $100,000 a
[02:33:00] year and be the only person in the
[02:33:02] department and no one there knew
[02:33:03] anything about media and so he wasn't
[02:33:05] going to [music] learn, he was going to
[02:33:07] earn. Whereas somebody who got into the
[02:33:10] big leagues and learned 10 times the
[02:33:13] skill set then 10 years later is either
[02:33:15] starting a multi-million dollar company
[02:33:17] or heading up a multi-million dollar
[02:33:19] division in a billion dollar company.
[02:33:21] and [music] the potential is so much
[02:33:22] wider because 10 years from now someone
[02:33:24] says what's your experience? It's like
[02:33:25] well I I worked at a real estate firm
[02:33:27] and I made their social media content.
[02:33:29] Who gives a [ __ ] Whereas if you're like
[02:33:31] I worked for one of the biggest media
[02:33:32] companies out there. Everyone will give
[02:33:34] you the job offer. And that is when you
[02:33:35] can choose to earn over learn. But
[02:33:38] people make the trade too soon because
[02:33:39] they compare themselves to people on
[02:33:41] social media [music]
[02:33:42] and think that the 00001% is the norm.
[02:33:46] Whenever you choose to earn rather than
[02:33:48] learn, you're right hooking life and
[02:33:50] saying, "I'm no longer going to develop
[02:33:51] and this is good enough." And so, if a
[02:33:52] $100,000 a year is actually good enough
[02:33:54] for your long-term goals, then do it.
[02:33:55] But I would imagine that it probably
[02:33:57] isn't for what you really want to do
[02:33:58] long term. And I'm using 100, you know,
[02:34:00] six figures as a as a placeholder. It
[02:34:02] can be whatever number you [music] want.
[02:34:03] When you make that decision that you're
[02:34:04] no longer going to learn, that's when
[02:34:05] you stop growing your potential to learn
[02:34:07] more. I say this because that's what I
[02:34:08] did. I had a white collar consulting job
[02:34:11] for defense contracting. I had a top
[02:34:13] secret clearance. I had everything that
[02:34:14] looked good on paper. [music] space,
[02:34:15] cyber intelligence. I had a two to
[02:34:17] threeear path clearly for for getting an
[02:34:19] MBA at an Ivy League school and then
[02:34:21] decided [music] to drop all of that and
[02:34:23] start working for $13 an hour at a gym
[02:34:25] after I graduated Magnum Laui in [music]
[02:34:27] 3 years from Vanderbilt. I know what I'm
[02:34:29] asking people to do and I'm not asking
[02:34:30] them to do something that I wasn't
[02:34:32] willing [music] to do. And I think that
[02:34:33] I might have even a more extreme version
[02:34:34] that most people are having to live
[02:34:36] with. Trying to say like, well, I can't
[02:34:37] figure out what I want is [music] a
[02:34:39] really paralyzing place to be that I
[02:34:41] think a lot of young people are in. is
[02:34:43] like I want to find my passion. But the
[02:34:45] big misnomer is actually a language
[02:34:47] [music] issue which is that people say
[02:34:48] they want to find their passion rather
[02:34:49] than they want to build it or create it
[02:34:51] or learn it. And so like I can promise
[02:34:52] you that if you're good at something,
[02:34:53] you'll like doing it. And [music] the
[02:34:54] only way that you get good at something
[02:34:55] is by doing things that you suck at and
[02:34:57] doing a lot of it.
[02:34:59] So let's say you make $50,000 a year. It
[02:35:01] cost you $950,000 a year not to know how
[02:35:05] to make a million dollar a year. So how
[02:35:07] much is that education worth? Answer
[02:35:10] [music] the difference. The difference
[02:35:11] between $1 million and $50,000, which is
[02:35:14] $950 grand. If you learn how to make a
[02:35:17] million dollar, the education is worth
[02:35:19] the difference. [music] This is why
[02:35:20] education and information are the most
[02:35:22] valuable things that we can know. Elon
[02:35:25] has like lost everything and then gained
[02:35:27] it back. So many of the best
[02:35:28] entrepreneurs have stories where they
[02:35:29] lost it all and then gained it back. And
[02:35:31] so, how is it that they can go to zero,
[02:35:32] back to a [music] billion, where
[02:35:34] somebody starting at zero can't get
[02:35:35] there because they didn't lose the
[02:35:36] education, they didn't lose the
[02:35:38] learning, they had a bad role. And
[02:35:40] sometimes in business, you do make bets
[02:35:42] on markets and sometimes they don't
[02:35:43] shape up, but you didn't lose. And a lot
[02:35:46] of times you actually gain in experience
[02:35:48] so that the next bet pays off even
[02:35:50] bigger. Everyone gets this wrong. The
[02:35:52] most expensive thing you ever pay for
[02:35:54] isn't your car. It isn't your house. It
[02:35:56] isn't your insurance. It's the
[02:35:58] information that you don't know but
[02:35:59] should. I mean, how many things can you
[02:36:01] think of right now that if you knew 10
[02:36:03] years ago would have materially changed
[02:36:05] your financial outcome, your relational
[02:36:07] outcome, your physical outcomes?
[02:36:08] probably a lot. What is the value of
[02:36:10] that information? Borderline [music]
[02:36:12] priceless. And so the idea that we
[02:36:14] wouldn't invest in paying down that debt
[02:36:16] of ignorance that we owe the universe is
[02:36:18] just because we don't know who we're
[02:36:20] paying the check to every month for the
[02:36:22] things that we don't [music] know that
[02:36:23] we don't value it appropriately. The
[02:36:25] cost of success is the years of feeling
[02:36:28] like an idiot for [music] things that
[02:36:29] you should have known by now. All the
[02:36:30] the decisions that I made up to this
[02:36:32] point led me to here. And I don't regret
[02:36:33] my life, so I don't regret not knowing.
[02:36:35] I mean, if I started over, I'd be
[02:36:37] wealthier than I am now. You know what I
[02:36:38] mean? I can't go back in time, but if I
[02:36:41] could go back in time to talk to my
[02:36:43] 20-year-old self, and it wouldn't change
[02:36:44] the outcome of my life now, because I
[02:36:46] would never roll that dice, [music] is I
[02:36:47] would say, "There's two things that you
[02:36:48] don't understand that will massively
[02:36:50] change your life. You don't understand
[02:36:51] brand, and you don't understand
[02:36:52] product." Because I was obsessive in my
[02:36:55] 20s on sales and marketing and what I
[02:36:58] would consider fast money. I had fast
[02:37:00] feedback loops. So, I would I'd get
[02:37:02] better at sales and then I'd immediately
[02:37:03] make more sales. I'd get better at
[02:37:04] marketing, immediately make more money.
[02:37:05] And so I had this very fast feedback
[02:37:07] loop that gave me the misinformation or
[02:37:09] the false belief that this was the right
[02:37:11] path. But I was actually just playing
[02:37:13] the wrong game because it's kind of like
[02:37:15] in the Matrix when Neo says to Morpheus,
[02:37:18] "So [music] you're saying when I'm fast
[02:37:19] enough, I'll be able to dodge bullets."
[02:37:21] And he said, "No, I'm saying when you're
[02:37:22] ready, you won't have to." Me being
[02:37:24] obsessive about sales and marketing was
[02:37:26] me trying to get faster and faster in
[02:37:28] [music] the matrix and not being the one
[02:37:31] and seeing the code for what it is,
[02:37:33] which is that if you make a product
[02:37:34] that's good enough, people will do the
[02:37:36] marketing and sales for you. If your
[02:37:38] brand is strong enough, people will make
[02:37:40] the association that they want to buy
[02:37:42] your stuff regardless of how good your
[02:37:44] copy and your headline and your landing
[02:37:46] pages and your conversion rate
[02:37:47] optimization and your media buying are.
[02:37:49] I kept [music] getting really good at a
[02:37:51] game that if I knew how to master the
[02:37:53] big things that mattered would make
[02:37:54] those skills almost irrelevant. When
[02:37:56] $100 million Offers came out the [music]
[02:37:58] book, I didn't make it for anything. I
[02:37:59] made it for me. And it was originally
[02:38:01] intended to be an internal document. And
[02:38:02] so I just wanted to make it exceptional.
[02:38:03] [music] And what happened once I
[02:38:05] released it is what shocked me the most
[02:38:07] was that I posted once and [music] I
[02:38:09] just said, "Hey, I wrote this book. Hope
[02:38:10] you guys like it." And then we sold out
[02:38:12] in minutes. And I was like, "That's
[02:38:13] weird." The next month more copies sold.
[02:38:14] [music] And then the next month more
[02:38:16] copies sold. And then the next month
[02:38:17] more copies sold. and has continued to
[02:38:18] sell more copies month after month after
[02:38:20] month for 2 years and it's still number
[02:38:22] one in its category on Amazon. And that
[02:38:24] was [music] with zero paid marketing
[02:38:26] purely off of people telling people
[02:38:28] about the book. And so when I saw how
[02:38:30] much leverage that was [music] that that
[02:38:32] book sells thousands a day, not dollars,
[02:38:35] thousands of copies a day, I have never
[02:38:37] marketed anything well enough [music] to
[02:38:38] sell a,000 customers a day. Now mind
[02:38:42] you, I've always had more expensive
[02:38:43] stuff that I've sold, but like I'd never
[02:38:44] seen that kind of transaction volume.
[02:38:46] And the only way to get that kind of
[02:38:47] transaction volume is to have a huge
[02:38:48] amount of leverage. The leverage that
[02:38:50] product unlocked for me or that
[02:38:52] understanding was that if you make it
[02:38:53] good enough and I love this saying which
[02:38:55] is there's too big to fail and I love
[02:38:57] the other one which is too good to fail.
[02:38:59] My headline for $100 million offers
[02:39:02] makes no sense. No one knows what $100
[02:39:03] million offers is and it's just like a
[02:39:05] picture of a $100 bill. It's a big
[02:39:06] purple book. Like it actually makes no
[02:39:08] sense. But [music] the contents of the
[02:39:09] book were valuable enough that people
[02:39:11] were like just just read it. And they
[02:39:13] said it so many times to so many people.
[02:39:14] And most people who when I see the
[02:39:16] comments and I see the reviews, they
[02:39:18] say, "I had four different people in the
[02:39:20] same month tell me in different groups
[02:39:22] that I should read this book, so I
[02:39:24] decided to do it even though it looked
[02:39:25] hokey and oh my god, this thing is
[02:39:26] unbelievable." And then they tell 20
[02:39:28] people or 100 people. That was when I
[02:39:30] realized how much leverage spending more
[02:39:32] time upfront on building a better
[02:39:34] product would unlock for me. What I used
[02:39:36] to do was spend two months building a
[02:39:38] good product and spend two years
[02:39:40] marketing that product with great
[02:39:41] marketing rather than spending two years
[02:39:44] on a great product and then for the rest
[02:39:46] of my life not having to spend any
[02:39:48] dollars or effort on marketing so that
[02:39:50] it would sell again and again and again
[02:39:52] because of the quality of the product
[02:39:54] itself. And so that was the first lesson
[02:39:57] that my younger self needed to
[02:39:58] understand about business. And the level
[02:40:01] of detail that it takes to go from good
[02:40:03] to great is so much wider than people
[02:40:04] think it is. The difference between an
[02:40:06] eight and a nine is 10 times the work.
[02:40:08] The difference between nine and nine and
[02:40:09] a half is 10 times the work. [music] The
[02:40:10] difference between nine and a half and
[02:40:11] 9.75 is another 10 times the work. It's
[02:40:13] so much more effort. And honestly, when
[02:40:15] I was younger, I couldn't even
[02:40:16] comprehend the amount of work that I can
[02:40:17] do now. And for me, that amount of work
[02:40:19] is the amount of unbroken focused time
[02:40:21] that I can stick with one task. I did
[02:40:23] not have that level of focus. I didn't
[02:40:25] have a strong enough no muscle. I didn't
[02:40:26] know how to turn down other things that
[02:40:28] would distract me for long enough. If
[02:40:30] you can count in terms of hundreds, like
[02:40:31] I can promise you if you put a,000 hours
[02:40:33] into something, it'll probably be pretty
[02:40:35] good. And most people spend like a 100
[02:40:38] hours on something or I mean that's
[02:40:39] [ __ ] Most people spend even less than
[02:40:41] time than that. You start a clock when
[02:40:42] you start working. You stop a clock when
[02:40:44] you stop working. You spend 1,000 hours
[02:40:45] or 2,000 hours on something. There's a
[02:40:47] level of detail because of the number of
[02:40:49] exposures you'll get to it. the crispy
[02:40:51] details of the product or the service
[02:40:54] that can only come from looking at that
[02:40:56] thing when it's cold, looking at thing
[02:40:57] when it's hot, looking at it when you're
[02:40:59] angry, looking at it when you're sad,
[02:41:00] looking at it when you're inspired,
[02:41:01] looking at it when you're bored. You see
[02:41:03] it with different lenses and then what
[02:41:04] happens is it just gives you so much
[02:41:06] more depth and context to whatever
[02:41:08] you're trying to build. That that's the
[02:41:10] difference between mediocre products and
[02:41:11] excellent products. And it just takes
[02:41:12] time. Hey, and real quick, I spent 200
[02:41:14] hours this year just making this one
[02:41:17] project for you, which is the $100
[02:41:19] million scaling roadmap. And I broke up
[02:41:22] the stages of business into 10 stages.
[02:41:24] And you can identify where you're at by
[02:41:26] simply just putting in your business
[02:41:28] information. You go to
[02:41:28] acquisition.com/roadmap
[02:41:30] and it'll spit out this custom report
[02:41:32] that tells you what the constraints are
[02:41:34] at that current level and what you need
[02:41:35] to do to graduate and get to the next
[02:41:37] level. This is our gift to you
[02:41:38] absolutely free. on the thank you page.
[02:41:40] You can book a call with our team and
[02:41:41] we'd love to help you uh figure that out
[02:41:43] and ideally get past it. In an ocean of
[02:41:46] volume, which there's more commoditized
[02:41:48] products and [music] services today than
[02:41:50] ever before, there's outsized returns to
[02:41:52] being number one. It is an even bigger
[02:41:54] winner take all market [music] now than
[02:41:56] it ever has been because of social media
[02:41:58] and the ease of letting other people
[02:41:59] know about stuff. If you are truly the
[02:42:01] best, everyone will know. And if
[02:42:03] everyone knows you are the best, you
[02:42:04] will have more demand than you can
[02:42:05] possibly deal with. [music] people think
[02:42:06] that word of mouth is dead when there's
[02:42:08] literally never been an easier way to go
[02:42:10] viral in a literal sense from people
[02:42:12] telling other people about stuff.
[02:42:15] I said the second lesson was brand and
[02:42:16] so I had to look at a company or brand
[02:42:19] [music] as a learning tool as what are
[02:42:23] people going to learn to associate my
[02:42:25] brand with the tangible and the
[02:42:27] intangible ideas. There are many people
[02:42:30] that I associated with when I was
[02:42:32] younger that I would never associate
[02:42:33] with today. [music] Even though I would
[02:42:34] say, "Well, I don't act that way. I
[02:42:36] don't live my life the way they live
[02:42:37] their lives." People would still make
[02:42:38] that association. If I did nothing but
[02:42:40] talk with porn stars on my show, people
[02:42:42] would still make a very different
[02:42:43] association with me. [music] And so, I
[02:42:46] want to embody certain values that I
[02:42:50] want my brand to associate with. And
[02:42:52] anything that is not those things by
[02:42:54] default detracts from it because it
[02:42:56] dilutes the association. Branding is
[02:42:58] like curating a garden where pretty much
[02:43:00] anything but the flower that you're
[02:43:01] trying to grow there is a weed. Even if
[02:43:03] it's a daffodil, even if it's a
[02:43:05] sunflower, even if the flower itself is
[02:43:07] fine, like I said, I have no issues with
[02:43:08] porn. I think it's a sunflower,
[02:43:09] whatever. But if I'm trying to grow
[02:43:10] roses, then anything that's not a rose
[02:43:12] doesn't belong. Being so vigilant about
[02:43:15] defending that garden of association and
[02:43:18] reputation gives you so much leverage.
[02:43:20] Because the reason Warren Buffett now
[02:43:22] can just do deals that no one else can
[02:43:23] do is because his handshake means more
[02:43:25] than the US government's. If he says he
[02:43:27] will pay, we know he [music] will pay.
[02:43:29] If he says he will be there to ensure
[02:43:31] your entire city, we know he will. He
[02:43:33] can do a deal on a one-page agreement
[02:43:35] for billions of dollars because people
[02:43:38] trust and they know that his reputation
[02:43:39] matters more than anything to him.
[02:43:41] [music] And so trust is leverage for
[02:43:43] deals. It's leverage for sales. The
[02:43:45] first experience I had with having a
[02:43:47] strong brand was when we were probably a
[02:43:50] year year and a half into gym launch, I
[02:43:52] launched [music] what would become
[02:43:53] Allen, my software project. And when
[02:43:55] people heard I had launched a new thing,
[02:43:57] the clients that I had were sending
[02:44:00] screenshots of their credit cards to my
[02:44:02] customer support team saying, "I don't
[02:44:04] know what it was, but if Alex made it,
[02:44:05] I'll buy it." And so all of the ideas
[02:44:08] and the obsessions around how I was
[02:44:10] going to market it and how I was going
[02:44:11] to position it. The thing that mattered
[02:44:12] most was what they had already received
[02:44:15] from me and how much I had delivered on
[02:44:17] my first promise. And so when I realized
[02:44:19] that, I was like, "All of this sales and
[02:44:21] marketing stuff gets you one sale.
[02:44:23] [music] delivering exceptional product
[02:44:24] and exceptional reputation around your
[02:44:26] products gets you every other sale after
[02:44:28] that [music] and you will always be able
[02:44:30] to sell the next thing provided you
[02:44:32] delivered on the first thing and that's
[02:44:34] where there's this obsession with
[02:44:35] marketing because there's always more
[02:44:36] people to sell [music] to. It's a very
[02:44:38] in my opinion tiring life. You always
[02:44:40] have to go get new customers. If you
[02:44:42] make sales to get customers rather than
[02:44:45] get customers to make sales, you make
[02:44:47] the customer the goal and then you get
[02:44:49] to keep that relationship and then next
[02:44:51] year you still have that customer. If
[02:44:52] you got a customer just to make a sale,
[02:44:54] you have to go get another customer to
[02:44:55] make another sale next year. But if you
[02:44:57] make a sale to create the relationship
[02:44:59] of the customer, then next year that
[02:45:00] customer will [music] buy again and the
[02:45:02] new customer will buy. And the third
[02:45:03] year you get the first two years and the
[02:45:05] third customer. And then that is how you
[02:45:07] create a compounding vehicle. And so
[02:45:08] both of those things, brand and product,
[02:45:10] are actually underlying one concept now
[02:45:13] that I'm saying it out loud, which is I
[02:45:14] didn't understand compounding. I thought
[02:45:17] that it was normal to have to go out,
[02:45:18] bang doors, call phones, DM, run ads to
[02:45:21] get customers every single month and
[02:45:23] that next month I'm [music] going to
[02:45:24] have to get another 20 just to keep the
[02:45:26] lights on rather than having spent more
[02:45:28] time on my reputation and the quality of
[02:45:30] my product so that [music] when I sold
[02:45:32] the first hundred, they would never
[02:45:33] leave again. And then they would send me
[02:45:35] the next hundred and I wouldn't have to
[02:45:36] do anything. And then I would be able to
[02:45:38] fend people off and then I'd be able to
[02:45:39] raise my prices and be able to take
[02:45:41] people on my terms. But I didn't
[02:45:42] understand any of that. And part of that
[02:45:44] is because I wanted money so fast.
[02:45:46] [music] And building a great product
[02:45:47] takes longer. Building a great
[02:45:49] reputation literally never stops until
[02:45:50] the day you die. Leaning into that
[02:45:52] lesson, you know, the first book I
[02:45:54] launched and I think it did 2 or 4,000
[02:45:57] copies sold its first month, something
[02:45:58] like that. You know, the second book
[02:46:00] that launched 2 years later, sold
[02:46:01] 250,000 [music] copies in its first
[02:46:03] month, which for context, the average
[02:46:05] New York Times bestseller sells between
[02:46:06] 10 and 100,000 [music] in its first 12
[02:46:08] months. And we sold 250 in the first
[02:46:10] month. The only way that that can happen
[02:46:12] is if [music] the people who bought the
[02:46:13] first book buy the second book and
[02:46:15] everybody they tell also buy and that
[02:46:18] book still continues to sell at twice
[02:46:19] the rate of my first book today.
[02:46:22] Here's how to spot friends that are
[02:46:24] worth cutting. They only talk about your
[02:46:26] past, not your future. So, if you go and
[02:46:29] you hang out with your buddies and all
[02:46:30] they can really reminisce with you on is
[02:46:32] the things that you did together, but
[02:46:34] none of them are talking about what
[02:46:35] they're going to do or what you're going
[02:46:36] to do. For me, that's a telltale sign
[02:46:38] that they're living in the [music] past.
[02:46:39] They're not even living in the present.
[02:46:40] Their best years are behind them. And
[02:46:42] for most of us, we want our best years
[02:46:44] to be ahead of us. And we want somebody
[02:46:45] who's also looking at the same goal as
[02:46:47] us, which is growth, [music] which is
[02:46:48] moving forward, which is making
[02:46:49] progress. If you are a growth oriented
[02:46:51] individual and you feel like you're not
[02:46:53] sure about your environment or if it's
[02:46:55] conducive, the easiest limit test is who
[02:46:58] talks about the future [music]
[02:46:59] and who talks about the past. Keep the
[02:47:01] ones who only talk about the future. Cut
[02:47:03] the ones talking about the past. The
[02:47:04] best thing that I ever did was not
[02:47:06] listen to other people's opinions about
[02:47:08] my life. They don't want the best
[02:47:10] version of you. They want the version of
[02:47:11] you who best serves them. Now, when I
[02:47:14] first said this, I got flack from a
[02:47:16] bunch of parents. [music] They're like,
[02:47:18] I really want the best for my kids. I
[02:47:20] was like, that's not true. [music] You
[02:47:22] want a version of your children who
[02:47:25] serves what you think will make you look
[02:47:27] the best. Family, I would say more often
[02:47:30] than not, has a closer alignment with
[02:47:32] your long-term goals than [music]
[02:47:33] strangers do. And so it makes sense that
[02:47:36] family would have more aligned interests
[02:47:38] but not completely aligned interests
[02:47:39] with you because the only person who has
[02:47:41] a completely aligned interest with you
[02:47:42] is future you. Keeping that as the limus
[02:47:44] test of whose opinion I'm going to
[02:47:45] listen to although it's more difficult
[02:47:47] has ultimately been very fruitful for me
[02:47:49] because if you're looking at two even
[02:47:51] two parents you can disprove that
[02:47:52] concept by saying okay well both parents
[02:47:54] want different things from me of the
[02:47:56] things that both parents want. Which of
[02:47:57] the [music] things help each of the
[02:47:59] parents individually out? Cuz I can
[02:48:00] promise you that the thing that one
[02:48:01] parent wants doesn't hurt them and help
[02:48:03] the other parent. if they disagree, it's
[02:48:05] usually something that's more aligned
[02:48:06] with their worldview, their beliefs, or
[02:48:08] what they will get status from in their
[02:48:10] community for you doing. And so, all of
[02:48:12] the things I just described have nothing
[02:48:14] to do with you. So, why consider it?
[02:48:16] I'll say this upfront. I hate why
[02:48:17] questions cuz who knows why? But I would
[02:48:19] say that I if if I had to make a guess
[02:48:21] on why we care about other people's
[02:48:23] opinions, it's because we've learned to
[02:48:24] care about other people's opinions.
[02:48:26] [music] And when we're children, we
[02:48:27] learn to orient ourselves to the world
[02:48:29] through other people telling us what is
[02:48:31] what. Literally, when you're a kid, you
[02:48:33] point and [music] then you say, "Well,
[02:48:34] what's that?" And then they say this.
[02:48:37] And so, you have to listen to other
[02:48:39] people on the way up. The problem is at
[02:48:41] some point you have to turn it off and
[02:48:42] say, you know, some of the people I was
[02:48:44] listening to had no idea what they were
[02:48:45] saying. But you don't know they have no
[02:48:46] idea because you don't have a context or
[02:48:47] make a judgment. You have to learn to
[02:48:49] become human and then you have to learn
[02:48:50] to become yourself. And I think that at
[02:48:52] that turning point, you then have to
[02:48:54] analyze the beliefs that you've been
[02:48:55] given and then keep the ones that you
[02:48:57] choose. Most parents are riskaverse
[02:49:00] rather than risk-taking for their
[02:49:02] children. So like we are willing to take
[02:49:04] more risk for ourselves often times than
[02:49:05] our parents are willing to take on our
[02:49:06] behalf. And I think that's normal. They
[02:49:07] want to like keep you alive. There's a
[02:49:08] lot of evolutionary drive behind that.
[02:49:10] And so they're playing not to lose. But
[02:49:11] if you want to play to win, then you
[02:49:13] have to take different bets. I think a
[02:49:14] lot of younger people get really
[02:49:15] confused because they spend a lot of
[02:49:16] time talking about ideas and very little
[02:49:18] talking doing actions. And so if you
[02:49:21] just define the world by only things
[02:49:23] that occur in it and not things that
[02:49:25] occur in your mind, there's a lot less
[02:49:27] noise. And so it becomes easier to see
[02:49:29] the forest of the trees. Let's say I
[02:49:31] have an employee and I want to hop
[02:49:32] [music] on a one-on-one and they said
[02:49:34] something in a meeting before and I say,
[02:49:35] "I think the intention behind your
[02:49:37] statement was that you wanted me to do
[02:49:39] this and this is how I was feeling about
[02:49:42] your statement and this is probably
[02:49:43] where you were feeling. Everything I
[02:49:45] just said is a complete waste of time
[02:49:46] because all I know is that they said
[02:49:48] this." And [music] so just focus on the
[02:49:49] facts. And if you can do that, it
[02:49:52] actually makes living life a lot easier
[02:49:53] or navigating life a lot easier. At
[02:49:55] least it has for me because those are
[02:49:57] the only objective truths. An easy
[02:49:59] [music] frame for that is like, would it
[02:50:00] be admitted to a court as evidence? You
[02:50:03] saying you were offended is not
[02:50:04] evidence. John said this to Sally, these
[02:50:07] words, that's evidence. Indisputable.
[02:50:09] And so just look at the things that are
[02:50:10] beyond reproach. Look at the things that
[02:50:11] are indisputable. Look at the things
[02:50:12] that are facts that are observable. And
[02:50:14] the world gets a lot quieter. And you
[02:50:16] also realize that most people are full
[02:50:17] of [ __ ] and don't know what they're
[02:50:18] talking about. I mean, if someone was
[02:50:20] like, "Hey, Alex, why did you get into
[02:50:22] business?" I could make up an answer. It
[02:50:23] just how do we know it's true? Trying to
[02:50:25] figure out someone's intention is
[02:50:26] [ __ ] If someone [music] asked me,
[02:50:28] "Why did you get into business?" I can
[02:50:30] make up an answer. Anyone can make up an
[02:50:32] answer. Why do you like making money?
[02:50:34] Why do you like sales? Why do you like
[02:50:35] marketing? Why are you good at this? I
[02:50:37] can make up any answer. All I know is
[02:50:39] that these things have [music] occurred.
[02:50:41] And so we can look at my actions and we
[02:50:43] can look at the results. The rest of it
[02:50:45] of which which had what influence on
[02:50:47] what like I can't relive my life and I
[02:50:48] can't run the experiment. And so trying
[02:50:50] to determine why like was it because my
[02:50:51] mom didn't hug me? Was it because my dad
[02:50:53] hugged me too hard? Who knows? I can
[02:50:54] give anyone and someone will nod and say
[02:50:56] great because we've trained ourselves to
[02:50:57] say to answer when someone says why do
[02:50:59] you do that? You give them words and
[02:51:00] [music] they nod and say oh that's
[02:51:01] interesting but like it doesn't mean
[02:51:02] it's true. And so I just try and skirt
[02:51:04] the whole conversation because [music]
[02:51:06] there's no point. So when someone's
[02:51:07] like, "Well, I'm the type of person who
[02:51:09] I'm like, just stop." Then they start
[02:51:11] [music] using this label to decide
[02:51:13] whether or why they can or can't do
[02:51:15] something. I wouldn't be successful with
[02:51:17] that cuz I'm a knee freak. Why? Because
[02:51:19] [music] you take trash out of your car
[02:51:20] regularly. Why does that have anything
[02:51:22] to do with whether you could do this or
[02:51:23] not? I used to think and told [music]
[02:51:25] people I was bad at math until I was 25.
[02:51:28] Post college, postconulting job, all of
[02:51:30] it. And then I decided [music] that I
[02:51:31] was not going to be bad at math. And so
[02:51:33] I was like, "Okay, well, I'm not going
[02:51:34] to use a calculator." And so then I
[02:51:36] started getting better and better at
[02:51:37] doing math problems. And then lo and
[02:51:39] behold, uh when I took the GMAT, I was
[02:51:41] like, "Okay, I have to study twice as
[02:51:42] hard for the math section." And I did
[02:51:44] just as well in the math section as I
[02:51:45] did on my verbal. [music] But my whole
[02:51:47] life, I had said I was bad at math. And
[02:51:49] so I didn't study as hard because I was
[02:51:51] bad at it. Everyone who's listening to
[02:51:52] this has something they say about
[02:51:54] themselves. They're like, "I'm not
[02:51:55] organized. I'm an early bird." [music]
[02:51:57] Right? Like we have these labels we give
[02:51:58] ourselves, but like why do we have these
[02:52:00] labels? Like if you needed to wake up
[02:52:01] early, you [ __ ] wake up early. If you
[02:52:02] need to stay up late, you stay up
[02:52:03] [music] late. The labels change our
[02:52:05] behavior more than we change the labels.
[02:52:06] I really abhore labels overall because I
[02:52:08] feel like it limits my action. When I
[02:52:10] get on podcasts and I have talks and
[02:52:12] people try and label me, you'll probably
[02:52:14] actively see me break the label almost
[02:52:16] every time because I'm really aware
[02:52:17] [music] of it. And a lot of people
[02:52:19] aren't. And I don't think people do it
[02:52:20] on purpose in a bad way. I just think
[02:52:22] that they will speak things over you
[02:52:24] which is why I hate going home because
[02:52:25] [music] no one speaks [ __ ] over you more
[02:52:27] than your family and the people who knew
[02:52:28] you in high school. Alex has always had
[02:52:29] a short temper. You You're a hotthead.
[02:52:31] Literally people from home describe me
[02:52:33] that way. I was like I don't think I'm a
[02:52:34] hotthehead. They will say that and then
[02:52:36] I feel like I have to really put up my
[02:52:38] mental like defenses to be like this is
[02:52:40] not true. Here's the [music] evidence
[02:52:41] that this is not true. What would a
[02:52:43] hotthead do in these scenarios that is
[02:52:44] not the way I behaved therefore right?
[02:52:46] And I have to I have to basically unwind
[02:52:48] that [ __ ] whenever [music] I go there.
[02:52:50] And so that is why I've been an advocate
[02:52:52] of like if you want to change your
[02:52:53] behavior, change your environment
[02:52:53] because they're not going to reinforce
[02:52:54] labels that you then also perpetuate in
[02:52:57] your own mind by the actions you take as
[02:52:58] a result. [music] And the only reason
[02:53:00] they want a label is because it's
[02:53:01] shorthand for other people to
[02:53:02] understand, not because it's true. They
[02:53:04] just want to say he had a bad childhood.
[02:53:05] And so they [music] take your whole life
[02:53:06] and they just say bad. That's not true.
[02:53:08] There's more nuance to it. I prefer to
[02:53:10] think of ideals and think of taking
[02:53:12] steps towards those ideals. And since
[02:53:13] ideals are not binary of like he is
[02:53:15] courageous or he is not courageous, but
[02:53:16] how courageous is he [music] or how
[02:53:18] patient is he? Not impatient or patient,
[02:53:20] but how much. Then I know the values
[02:53:22] that I want to embody and then I [music]
[02:53:24] just take steps towards those every day
[02:53:26] with the actions I take. My success can
[02:53:28] be boiled down to elimination of
[02:53:29] distractions, getting started, getting
[02:53:31] better, and never stopping. Here's how
[02:53:33] to do that. There's four steps.
[02:53:35] Eliminate distractions, get started, get
[02:53:37] better, never stop. Number one,
[02:53:39] elimination of the things [music] that
[02:53:40] are distracting you. When I was young,
[02:53:42] my father gave me this advice. Rich
[02:53:44] people buy time. Poor people buy stuff.
[02:53:48] Ambitious people buy skills. Lazy people
[02:53:51] buy distraction. I can give you the
[02:53:53] first and easiest 2025 prediction. Look
[02:53:56] at what you spend money on. Look at your
[02:53:58] calendar. And wherever you invest is
[02:54:00] what you will get more of. So many
[02:54:02] people are surprised when they look at
[02:54:04] their bank account next year and it's
[02:54:06] lower than they want it to be. They look
[02:54:08] at their accomplishments from that year
[02:54:10] and it's not the things they set out to
[02:54:11] do. But when you look at their calendar
[02:54:13] and their credit card expenses, it's
[02:54:15] very obvious why those things didn't
[02:54:16] happen. Because we vote with our dollars
[02:54:18] about the things that we care about. We
[02:54:20] vote about the type of person that we
[02:54:21] want to become. And as the first thing
[02:54:23] that you can do today for next year is
[02:54:26] actually comment below this video. And I
[02:54:28] rarely ask for this. The thing that
[02:54:29] you're actually going to do today, not
[02:54:32] what you're going to begin doing next
[02:54:33] year or what your resolution is going to
[02:54:35] be. But if it's important enough to do
[02:54:36] for future you, it's certainly important
[02:54:39] enough to do for current you. Because
[02:54:40] current you, by the way, is the only you
[02:54:42] that's ever going to enjoy life. I'll
[02:54:44] give you this story. So I remember when
[02:54:46] I was a few years back, I was walking
[02:54:48] with Ila and we went to Sephora, which
[02:54:50] is like a makeup store. So, we walked
[02:54:51] inside, you know, I'm sitting, you know,
[02:54:53] standing there awkwardly cuz I'm like, I
[02:54:54] don't know what I'm supposed to do here.
[02:54:55] There's this lady with the smock who
[02:54:57] like helps out and she had these two
[02:54:59] girls who were young. They must have
[02:55:00] been maybe well about this this old. I'm
[02:55:02] guessing between 9 and 40, who knows?
[02:55:05] She's leaning over and she has these two
[02:55:06] paint brushes in her hands and she says,
[02:55:09] "Okay, girls, now that you guys are
[02:55:11] women, you need to start budgeting for
[02:55:13] this stuff because you're going to be
[02:55:14] spending money on this every single
[02:55:15] month to do your makeup." And so, the
[02:55:17] girls grabbed them. They were super
[02:55:18] excited and they went to go check out.
[02:55:19] And I saw that exchange as actually a
[02:55:22] really beautiful lesson when it comes to
[02:55:24] identity. Our priorities we dictate by
[02:55:27] what we spend, not by what we say. These
[02:55:30] girls, because they wanted to step into
[02:55:31] this new identity, had to match it with
[02:55:33] new priorities. So they had money or
[02:55:36] they had saved up their shekels or
[02:55:37] whatever they do for chores or
[02:55:38] babysitting or whatever. By doing that,
[02:55:40] they had to start prioritizing some of
[02:55:42] that money towards their new identity
[02:55:44] from girls to women. But the thing is is
[02:55:46] that many people who want to start next
[02:55:48] year think okay well I'm just going to
[02:55:50] see if this happens. But it doesn't work
[02:55:52] that way. You have to basically make the
[02:55:54] decision that this is the type of person
[02:55:56] that I want to become. And then these
[02:55:58] are the actions that that type of person
[02:56:00] would take and then we align our
[02:56:02] calendars and our budgets in accordance
[02:56:04] with that so that the investments we
[02:56:06] make yield the results that we want. But
[02:56:08] the thing is is that people want to say,
[02:56:10] "Hey, wouldn't it be great if I owned
[02:56:12] Apple?" But they never buy the stock. If
[02:56:13] you want to be that version of you, you
[02:56:15] need to start buying stock in that
[02:56:16] today. Both by paying in time and paying
[02:56:19] in money to vote with your dollars about
[02:56:20] what you truly care about. And the
[02:56:22] reason that I'm hitting this so hard is
[02:56:24] that it's never been easier than it is
[02:56:26] today to be successful. It's also never
[02:56:29] been easier to be distracted. So along
[02:56:31] the theme of investing in the things
[02:56:33] that matter most, the first thing we do
[02:56:35] is we eliminate all the stuff that
[02:56:37] sucks. I define commitment as the
[02:56:39] elimination of alternatives. If you get
[02:56:41] married, you eliminate all people of
[02:56:43] whatever sex you're married to that are
[02:56:44] not that person. Actually, you eliminate
[02:56:46] everyone who's not that person
[02:56:47] independent of sex, right? That is a
[02:56:49] commitment, right? If you enter into a
[02:56:51] uh partnership and you say, "I'm not
[02:56:53] going to do any business besides this
[02:56:54] business as part of the terms," then
[02:56:56] you've eliminated all alternatives. And
[02:56:58] so, if you want someone to commit, ask
[02:57:00] them to eliminate everything else that's
[02:57:01] not the main thing. These are all the
[02:57:03] things, a laundry list of things that
[02:57:05] are probably not your main thing that
[02:57:07] very likely are getting in the way. And
[02:57:09] these are the most common things that I
[02:57:10] see in my DMs, that I see in my comments
[02:57:13] from people who are not getting where
[02:57:14] they want to go as fast as they'd like
[02:57:16] to get there. First big category is bad
[02:57:19] friends. So if you want better friends,
[02:57:21] get used to seeing them less. Better
[02:57:24] friends are busy friends. So I remember
[02:57:26] when I started working more and some of
[02:57:30] the friends that I had were a little bit
[02:57:31] more ambitious, I started realizing that
[02:57:34] the people that I liked the most, I
[02:57:35] actually didn't spend as much time with.
[02:57:37] and the people that were always
[02:57:38] available were the ones that I didn't
[02:57:40] want to become more like. Here's five
[02:57:42] questions you should consider when
[02:57:44] thinking about whether to keep a friend
[02:57:46] in your life or cut them. Question
[02:57:48] number one is, if someone told you that
[02:57:50] you're a lot like your friend, would you
[02:57:52] take that as a compliment? Second, are
[02:57:55] you truly fulfilled by the friendship or
[02:57:58] is it just someone to keep you from
[02:57:59] being lonely? Third, are you able to be
[02:58:02] unapologetically yourself or do you feel
[02:58:05] the need to act differently to please
[02:58:07] that friend or to be around that friend?
[02:58:09] Fourth, do you like who this friend is
[02:58:13] right now today or do you like the idea
[02:58:16] of the friend and who they could be
[02:58:18] someday? And then finally, five, would
[02:58:21] you want your future or imagined child
[02:58:24] to be friends with someone like this
[02:58:26] person? And I think it's a really
[02:58:28] wonderful lipmus test because it forces
[02:58:30] you to take a look outside of yourself
[02:58:32] in order to have perspective from a
[02:58:34] third-party angle on the true quality of
[02:58:37] that person. But the reality is that
[02:58:39] rare people are by definition rare. It's
[02:58:42] normal to have fewer of them. And so if
[02:58:45] you only have a few friends or one good
[02:58:47] friend, then that's normal if you want
[02:58:51] rare and exceptional friends. If you
[02:58:53] have many friends, it's far more likely
[02:58:55] that the bar for your friendship is too
[02:58:58] low. And to give you a filter that I
[02:59:00] actually used for the most important
[02:59:01] friend in my life, Leila, I like to
[02:59:03] think, does this person have the same
[02:59:05] scale of goals that I have? So, it
[02:59:07] doesn't mean that they have to have the
[02:59:09] same goals as you, but it has to be the
[02:59:11] same level of goals as you because at
[02:59:13] least you're going in the same
[02:59:14] direction. So, that's number one. Number
[02:59:16] two is, do they have the same level of
[02:59:18] dedication and commitment to those
[02:59:20] goals? Because I don't know about you,
[02:59:21] but I had plenty of friends who were
[02:59:22] like, I want to be an NFL player. I want
[02:59:25] to be a really rich tech entrepreneur. I
[02:59:27] want to be a a touring musician, right?
[02:59:30] And they had these goals, but I'm like,
[02:59:31] dude, I see you just playing Fortnite 4
[02:59:33] hours a day and you you practice guitar
[02:59:35] once a week. Like, what do you really
[02:59:37] want that or do you just like saying it
[02:59:38] because it makes you feel good? And so,
[02:59:40] I wanted people who walked the walk. And
[02:59:43] I wanted people who would keep up with
[02:59:45] my pace. And if you are someone who's
[02:59:47] ambitious, and this is me just talking
[02:59:49] specifically to you, because there's
[02:59:50] only a few people who are watching this
[02:59:51] who really are, and you'll know that if
[02:59:53] it's you, you have to get used to being
[02:59:55] alone because there are seasons where
[02:59:57] you'll basically transition from one
[02:59:59] group of friends into another. And it's
[03:00:01] not even a group of you'll usually
[03:00:02] transition from a group of friends into
[03:00:04] no friends. And then you'll find one or
[03:00:06] two people who are at a new level. And
[03:00:08] then sometimes those people introduce
[03:00:09] you to some of their friends. And if you
[03:00:10] keep walking and you keep outpacing,
[03:00:13] then that group will then start retiring
[03:00:15] past you. and then maybe one person
[03:00:17] stays with you, maybe no one does, and
[03:00:18] you'll have another lonely period. I'm
[03:00:20] saying this because I used to think that
[03:00:22] there was something wrong with me when
[03:00:24] in reality I just didn't understand what
[03:00:27] the nature of being exceptional meant.
[03:00:29] And so I'm saying this purely from a
[03:00:32] definitional perspective. To be
[03:00:34] exceptional means that you are the
[03:00:36] exception. It means that you are not
[03:00:38] normal. And so it's normal for normal
[03:00:41] people to find you abnormal if you do
[03:00:44] things that are not normal. Don't let
[03:00:46] people who have mediocre goals deter you
[03:00:50] from taking actions that make you great
[03:00:53] because it makes you different.
[03:00:54] Realizing that I thought most people
[03:00:56] actually made no sense. They say they
[03:00:58] had these goals, but they took no
[03:00:59] action. And they called me work
[03:01:01] obsessed. They would tell me I should
[03:01:02] take time off and they're like, "Hey,
[03:01:04] you're not you're not you're not as cool
[03:01:05] anymore. You're not you're not hanging
[03:01:06] out with the boys. It's like why aren't
[03:01:08] you participating in the fantasy league?
[03:01:09] Why aren't you watching football on
[03:01:10] Sunday with us? And for me, I actually
[03:01:12] used to love watching football uh with
[03:01:14] my friends. It was actually one of my
[03:01:15] biggest things that I look forward to.
[03:01:16] But the thing is is that like I needed
[03:01:18] that Sunday cuz I had to prep workouts.
[03:01:19] I had to prep the music list for the
[03:01:21] next day. I had to run billing. I had to
[03:01:22] do all this other work. And the thing is
[03:01:25] is that like I looked at that football
[03:01:27] game and I was like my goals are more
[03:01:29] important to me than this. And so I
[03:01:30] think that a lot of people don't
[03:01:31] actually look at themselves in the
[03:01:33] mirror and say like one year from today
[03:01:34] will I will I remember this football
[03:01:37] game or will I remember the fact that
[03:01:39] I'm not where I said I wanted to be. And
[03:01:41] to me that was significantly more
[03:01:43] painful. Now this is an uncomfortable
[03:01:46] fact for a lot of people. Your ability
[03:01:49] to delay gratification is actually a
[03:01:51] function of intelligence. And so your
[03:01:54] ability to learn at a longer and longer
[03:01:56] delay is something that comes I mean
[03:01:57] we're talking from primates all the way
[03:01:59] up. And so basically if you want to
[03:02:02] teach a monkey how to do something you
[03:02:04] have to say hey do this thing and then
[03:02:06] immediately give them a reward. And the
[03:02:07] longer that period goes on the less
[03:02:10] trainable they are. The sign of
[03:02:11] intelligence is that you can actually
[03:02:13] expand the reinforcement window and they
[03:02:14] can still abstract it back to the
[03:02:17] original action. If you want to practice
[03:02:20] intelligence, then being able to
[03:02:22] actively delay your need for a result or
[03:02:26] reward from the work you do will make
[03:02:29] you a more intelligent person because
[03:02:31] your rate of learning will actually
[03:02:34] increase despite the fact that your
[03:02:36] reward rate will decrease in the short
[03:02:39] term. And so to give you full
[03:02:41] transparency on what 2025 might look
[03:02:43] like if you accomplish your goals at the
[03:02:45] end, you might have a different friend
[03:02:47] group or no friends at all for a season
[03:02:50] because you don't become like the people
[03:02:52] you admire. You become like the people
[03:02:54] you want to impress. Harvard made this,
[03:02:57] you know, wonderful study years ago
[03:02:58] about the best predictor of someone's
[03:03:01] long-term material success was what they
[03:03:03] called their reference group. Now, this
[03:03:05] has been misqued in places by the five
[03:03:07] people you spend the most time with, but
[03:03:09] it's actually the five people you
[03:03:10] compare yourself to, and that's a very
[03:03:12] big difference. Now, I want to take it a
[03:03:14] step further because I think to myself,
[03:03:16] what are the things that affect our
[03:03:18] behavior? And so, it's really about the
[03:03:21] people that you want to impress, not
[03:03:23] necessarily even who you compare
[03:03:25] yourself to, because it's the people
[03:03:27] whose voices you hear when you're about
[03:03:29] to make a big life decision. And so when
[03:03:32] you make a big life decision, you don't
[03:03:34] listen to the people closest to you. You
[03:03:37] should listen to the people closest to
[03:03:38] your goals. And some of them may not be
[03:03:40] in your neighborhood or your city or
[03:03:42] your state or your high school or your
[03:03:44] college. They might just be people you
[03:03:46] follow on the internet. And you have to
[03:03:47] abstract what would that person think
[03:03:50] about this decision? Not my mom, not my
[03:03:53] homie, not my uncle, or that person at
[03:03:56] church. And so I think this is a great
[03:03:58] transition of thinking through instead
[03:03:59] of necessarily even having mentors,
[03:04:01] having heroes and transposing what you
[03:04:04] think their decision-making calculus
[03:04:06] would be onto your life. And so it's
[03:04:09] interesting is that I will have
[03:04:10] conversations with entrepreneurs and
[03:04:12] they'll say, "Hey, here's my current
[03:04:13] condition. This is my desired state.
[03:04:15] This is what I perceive my obstacle to
[03:04:17] be." And I say, "Okay, well, what do you
[03:04:19] think?" And they're like, "Well, I think
[03:04:20] you're going to say I should do X, Y,
[03:04:21] and Z." And I'm like, "You're right. Why
[03:04:23] aren't you?" They're like, "Well," and
[03:04:26] the thing is is that basically what they
[03:04:28] answer with after that well is in
[03:04:31] essence other people's opinion who
[03:04:33] aren't at the place they want to be.
[03:04:35] Here's the the uncomfortable truth,
[03:04:36] which is that winners focus on winning.
[03:04:39] Losers focus on winners. And you never
[03:04:41] receive hate from above, always below,
[03:04:44] because winners have their eyes on the
[03:04:46] goal, not on other people. And so, you
[03:04:48] have to decide whether you want to be a
[03:04:49] loser or a winner. And I'm just being
[03:04:51] real with you. What this looks like in
[03:04:53] reality and maybe for you in 2025 will
[03:04:56] be like this. First, you look like an
[03:04:58] idiot to everyone else while you try to
[03:05:00] figure it out. Then everyone else looks
[03:05:03] like an idiot for ever doubting you.
[03:05:05] Seasons. And so, everyone takes a
[03:05:07] different amount of years to stop giving
[03:05:09] a [ __ ] about what everyone else thinks.
[03:05:12] And if you're going to get there
[03:05:13] eventually, you might as well start
[03:05:14] today and enjoy the benefits longer. So,
[03:05:17] if I'm 85 years old, I think about what
[03:05:20] that man cares about. And that man cares
[03:05:22] about very, very little. All you have to
[03:05:25] do is talk to an elderly person or a
[03:05:27] grandparent and be like, what do you
[03:05:28] think about this? A lot of like, ah, who
[03:05:30] cares? Like, it doesn't matter. Life is
[03:05:32] literally too short. They literally
[03:05:34] don't have time for it. And so I think
[03:05:36] to myself, if that's the ultimate
[03:05:38] version of me, if I'm going to get there
[03:05:40] eventually, and that's what the wisest
[03:05:42] people think after having the most life
[03:05:44] experience, then why would I not try to
[03:05:46] cheat code that into today and then not
[03:05:49] have to go looking back from 85 and
[03:05:51] think, man, I wish I knew then what I
[03:05:53] know now. Look forward to 85year-old
[03:05:55] self and say, I am going to choose to
[03:05:58] learn the lesson I know I'm going to
[03:05:59] learn and act as if I knew it today.
[03:06:01] Because the difference between them and
[03:06:03] you is that what they consider work, you
[03:06:08] consider life. And so you have to accept
[03:06:10] that you have a fundamental different
[03:06:11] understanding of how life works. And I
[03:06:15] believe that is a more accurate view of
[03:06:17] reality. The reason that the rich can
[03:06:19] get richer is because they see the world
[03:06:21] differently than the poor. And so it
[03:06:23] makes sense that if your poor friends
[03:06:25] don't see what you see, that they see
[03:06:27] through the lens of poverty. And all my
[03:06:30] goal in life is to be able to see
[03:06:31] reality more accurately. And so in the
[03:06:34] beginning, you have to develop this
[03:06:35] armor, this thick skin around people
[03:06:37] saying those little snide comments of
[03:06:39] like, you work too hard, you're too
[03:06:41] obsessed, you have a toxic work
[03:06:43] capacity, and why are you working
[03:06:45] weekends? Why are you working late
[03:06:47] nights? You're you're not like this is
[03:06:48] not worth it. They're not paying you
[03:06:50] enough for the work that you do. All of
[03:06:52] these different things. Because
[03:06:53] eventually that armor on the outside
[03:06:56] actually just becomes one with you. And
[03:06:59] you don't even hear it anymore because I
[03:07:01] can promise you that those people who
[03:07:03] were in my life decades ago. They're
[03:07:05] just not even I don't hear those those
[03:07:08] claims anymore for two reasons. One,
[03:07:10] because my reality changed so
[03:07:12] drastically that they couldn't say
[03:07:14] anything. And secondarily, they're just
[03:07:16] not in my world anymore. I was only able
[03:07:19] to get here because what they deemed
[03:07:21] acceptable, I deemed intolerable. how
[03:07:24] far you go in life. I truly believe this
[03:07:28] is based and predicated only on one
[03:07:30] thing which is your actual standard. And
[03:07:33] so I believe that the person who runs
[03:07:35] any company or runs any division should
[03:07:37] be the person who has the highest
[03:07:39] standards. And if there's ever a day
[03:07:40] that someone has a higher standard for
[03:07:42] acquisition.com than me, they should run
[03:07:44] this instead of me because they would be
[03:07:46] the one who's best serving the company.
[03:07:48] And so the person who should have the
[03:07:50] highest standard for you is you. And so
[03:07:53] it makes sense that they have a lower
[03:07:54] bar, but why would I listen to their bar
[03:07:56] on my life? I think that that standard
[03:07:59] is the one thing that rich kids get from
[03:08:02] rich parents more than anything else is
[03:08:05] because they have an expectation of
[03:08:08] life. They don't accept opportunities
[03:08:11] that are below that standard. And so
[03:08:13] they actually get their huge leg up on
[03:08:16] the pick on the vehicles that they
[03:08:18] choose to pursue. And so one of the
[03:08:20] tougher parts if you're not from an area
[03:08:22] where people make a lot of money or not
[03:08:23] from you don't know anybody who's a you
[03:08:25] know super successful entrepreneur is
[03:08:27] that you basically have to borrow
[03:08:28] someone else's measuring stick and you
[03:08:30] have to say is this the standard that
[03:08:32] Elon would pursue? Is this the standard
[03:08:35] Bezos would pursue? Is this the standard
[03:08:37] Jobs would pursue? And if it isn't then
[03:08:40] why are you doing it? If you want to be
[03:08:42] like them then act like them. If you
[03:08:44] want to be like your friends, then you
[03:08:46] can act like your friends, but don't be
[03:08:47] surprised that you have what they have
[03:08:49] or lack what they lack. If we're
[03:08:51] thinking about elimination, we're
[03:08:52] eliminating bad friends and tangentially
[03:08:54] their opinions about you that are
[03:08:56] affecting your behavior. So the next
[03:08:58] thing are what things are playing
[03:08:59] interference on your time and your
[03:09:01] attention. All right. So I would say
[03:09:03] opinions of other people are affecting
[03:09:04] your behavior and your decisions. I
[03:09:06] think that your environment affects your
[03:09:09] efficiency of behavior. So think about
[03:09:11] how much more you get per hour of
[03:09:13] output. If you can't sit still, ignore
[03:09:16] notifications, and focus on one task for
[03:09:19] eight hours straight. Never expect to
[03:09:21] build anything great. And as
[03:09:22] uncomfortable as that is, it's also the
[03:09:25] truth. Like I I don't know a single
[03:09:27] incredibly successful entrepreneur that
[03:09:29] can't sit down and have hyperfocused
[03:09:31] periods of time, sometimes weekends,
[03:09:33] weeks at a time, where they don't talk
[03:09:35] to anyone and they just hammer away. And
[03:09:37] it's whether they're coding for software
[03:09:39] or they're making some insane marketing
[03:09:41] campaign and all the email follow-ups
[03:09:42] and all the text follow-ups and and the
[03:09:44] affiliate uh you know promotions and
[03:09:45] incentives or someone who's creating a
[03:09:47] product that they're designing and
[03:09:49] they're in the shop and they keep
[03:09:50] tweaking at it. Or they're somebody
[03:09:52] who's who's hypers scaling a company and
[03:09:54] saying I'm going to sit in 20 interviews
[03:09:56] a day for for seven days straight so I
[03:09:58] can hire 20 people this week because I
[03:10:00] need to get going. Right? Like if you
[03:10:02] can't sit still and ignore notifications
[03:10:05] and focus for a day, nothing great will
[03:10:08] get accomplished because it's not about
[03:10:11] what you want, it's about what's
[03:10:12] required. And it's and whether that's
[03:10:14] your best or not is irrelevant. It's
[03:10:16] just there's a price tag and you got to
[03:10:17] be willing to pay for it or you don't
[03:10:19] get the thing. And a lot of times it's
[03:10:21] not what you want. And I I I I spend a
[03:10:24] lot of time trying to dispel the concept
[03:10:25] of like follow your passion because I
[03:10:27] think it leads more people astray than
[03:10:30] it helps because it's very easy for
[03:10:32] someone who's successful who's already
[03:10:34] delegated tons of things to only then
[03:10:36] focus on their area of genius and then
[03:10:38] say here for my seat do what I do. But
[03:10:41] there's a very big difference between
[03:10:42] doing what someone does and doing what
[03:10:44] they did to get there. And I think this
[03:10:46] is what's lost in a lot of the content
[03:10:47] that I see in the entrepreneurial space.
[03:10:49] And to be clear, whenever I'm trying to
[03:10:51] get to the next level, I often have to
[03:10:53] take on things that I don't know how to
[03:10:54] do and I have to learn how to do them,
[03:10:56] which means I have to suck for a period
[03:10:57] of time. And sucking sucks. But the
[03:10:59] thing is is you have to be able to
[03:11:00] embrace that period of time and say like
[03:11:02] this is the cost of greatness. And so
[03:11:04] I'll give you something very tactical.
[03:11:06] So I have timers in a lot of my offices
[03:11:08] and my team has adopted this too, which
[03:11:10] is I like to time block, which is
[03:11:12] essentially saying how long do I think
[03:11:14] this is going to take? And you can do
[03:11:15] this on a week scale, you can do it on a
[03:11:17] daily level. It depends on the level of
[03:11:18] project you're tackling. But for me,
[03:11:20] even on the most micro level, I say,
[03:11:22] "Okay, how long should this take?" I'll
[03:11:24] then crank this thing. Boop. I think
[03:11:26] this should take 20 minutes. And then I
[03:11:28] hit start and I let the timer go. And if
[03:11:30] for whatever reason something distracts
[03:11:32] me, I pause it so that I know that I
[03:11:36] didn't actually work that period of
[03:11:38] time. And so what happens is it will
[03:11:39] give you a very real look at how long
[03:11:41] you're actually working versus how long
[03:11:44] you think you're working. and you tell
[03:11:45] other people working and you Instagram
[03:11:47] how long you're working. And as I've
[03:11:49] become more efficient at work, meaning
[03:11:51] my output per unit of time has gone up,
[03:11:53] I've realized that there's just been a
[03:11:55] significant decrease in the distractions
[03:11:57] that I allow to interrupt me. Again, if
[03:12:00] you want to stay focused, staying
[03:12:01] focused is not like zeroing in and
[03:12:04] saying, "I'm going to do it just like
[03:12:05] I'm going to I'm going to I'm going to
[03:12:07] just zoom in on this thing." It's more
[03:12:10] that focus occurs when you remove
[03:12:13] everything else. what's left is focus.
[03:12:16] And so Jerry Seinfeld has this uh this
[03:12:18] famous process that he talks about with
[03:12:20] writing and I think writers are also
[03:12:21] wonderful people for talking to for deep
[03:12:23] work because it's the nature of the work
[03:12:24] they do. One of the things that he did
[03:12:26] and he has done for years for his
[03:12:28] standup so he can script it out is that
[03:12:30] he locks himself in a room that has no
[03:12:32] windows and has nothing but a yellow
[03:12:35] notepad and a pen. And he tells himself
[03:12:38] that he has to go in that room and he
[03:12:40] doesn't have to write but he can't do
[03:12:41] anything else. And so what ends up
[03:12:43] happening is that writing occurs as a
[03:12:45] default. And so focus kind of works the
[03:12:48] same way. You eliminate everything else
[03:12:50] by to create focus. You don't try and
[03:12:52] push harder while also having these
[03:12:54] disruptions. So there's three easy ways
[03:12:56] that I make my phone less distracting.
[03:12:58] The first is I switch it to grayscale.
[03:13:01] And so grayscale decreases consumption
[03:13:03] across all people by 30%ish. And that's
[03:13:06] researchbacked. It's pretty cool. The
[03:13:08] second thing is turning off all
[03:13:09] notifications across all apps on your
[03:13:12] phone because you never want your app to
[03:13:15] be dictating when it's convenient for
[03:13:17] the app to disrupt you. Like, how
[03:13:19] ridiculous is that? But we let apps have
[03:13:21] that permission. Most phones and people
[03:13:23] want to push notifications to you. I
[03:13:26] want to pull them when it's convenient
[03:13:28] for me. The third thing is other people.
[03:13:31] And so I have a mode on my phone where
[03:13:34] no one can get through. And when I do
[03:13:36] that, then I can reach out to them when
[03:13:38] it's convenient for me. Because if it's
[03:13:41] actually an emergency, call 911. And if
[03:13:43] it's not a true emergency, then it can
[03:13:45] wait. And my team wanted to remind me
[03:13:47] that I don't email. I heard in uh I
[03:13:49] think it was like 2016 that Bill Clinton
[03:13:52] didn't use email. And I was like, if
[03:13:54] he's the president, he doesn't use
[03:13:55] email, I cannot use email. And so uh my
[03:13:58] team doesn't contact me via email. And
[03:14:00] so if you can eliminate entire channels,
[03:14:03] that's also an easier way to concentrate
[03:14:06] uh fewer flows of communication. And
[03:14:09] here's the thing, it's always harder,
[03:14:12] takes longer, and costs more than you
[03:14:14] think it will. That is a reflection of
[03:14:17] poor expectations, not that that reality
[03:14:20] is bad. And so it makes sense that it
[03:14:22] would be harder, take longer, and cost
[03:14:25] more. Because if it didn't, then
[03:14:26] everyone would have it, and everyone had
[03:14:28] it, then it wouldn't be worthwhile. And
[03:14:30] so literally the difficulty of the task
[03:14:32] that you embark on is proportional to
[03:14:34] the reward that you ultimately get
[03:14:36] because you are the asset that you build
[03:14:38] more than the achievement. And so if
[03:14:40] it's hard, that's amazing because it
[03:14:42] will make you that much harder once you
[03:14:43] conquer it. And it will also make it
[03:14:45] harder for anybody else who wants to
[03:14:46] follow in your footsteps. And so the
[03:14:48] higher up the mountain you climb, the
[03:14:50] thinner the air gets and the rarer the
[03:14:52] climber or explorer must be in order to
[03:14:55] get there. And so, I don't know about
[03:14:57] you, but I would so much rather climb a
[03:14:59] mountain that so few people have been
[03:15:01] able to climb so that I can see a view
[03:15:02] that other people haven't seen. And so,
[03:15:04] speaking of expectations, let me talk
[03:15:06] about the worst expectation of all,
[03:15:08] which is entitlement, which is the
[03:15:10] expectation of life or other people to
[03:15:12] give you something without earning it.
[03:15:14] And I think that this is is a is a virus
[03:15:17] in today's culture right now. And so,
[03:15:19] there's the famous quote, "Hard times
[03:15:21] create strong men. Strong men create
[03:15:24] good times. Good times create weak men
[03:15:27] and weak men create hard times. It makes
[03:15:29] sense that right now we have a lot of
[03:15:32] weak men because it's been pretty good
[03:15:34] times. The good news about that is that
[03:15:36] it's so easy to beat them. You just have
[03:15:39] to show up, be on time, prepare the
[03:15:42] night before, remembers people's names,
[03:15:44] actually follow up when you say you were
[03:15:46] going to, and try like you mean it
[03:15:49] rather than trying like you want to get
[03:15:51] credit for trying. And I see this is
[03:15:53] this this thing that's that that's
[03:15:56] pervasive right now is that people will
[03:15:58] comment or they'll DM me and they're
[03:16:00] like, "Hey, I'm trying really hard." As
[03:16:02] though I'm supposed to give them credit
[03:16:04] for trying. The world doesn't work that
[03:16:06] way. It gives you credit for achieving.
[03:16:09] And the reason that you want credit for
[03:16:10] trying is because you want it to cost
[03:16:13] less, take shorter time period, and be
[03:16:15] easier. And so if you restate your
[03:16:18] complaint about the difficulty as, "Oh,
[03:16:21] I have false expectations about the ease
[03:16:23] or the price tag of this goal." Then all
[03:16:26] of a sudden you realize that the only
[03:16:27] real problem was that you expected it to
[03:16:30] cost less. It's like going to the store
[03:16:32] and being like, "Oh, I've got these
[03:16:33] Jordans that I really want to buy. I got
[03:16:35] $50. I'm so excited to buy them." You go
[03:16:37] to the store and see that they're $300.
[03:16:40] At that point, you can just say,
[03:16:41] "Jordans aren't for me." Or you can say,
[03:16:43] "Oh, I will have to keep working and
[03:16:45] keep saving so that I can afford this."
[03:16:47] And so it's a lot about affording the
[03:16:49] goals that you want to achieve and a lot
[03:16:52] of things that we have to spend in order
[03:16:54] to get them is the time and the
[03:16:56] rejection of not achieving what we want
[03:16:58] on the timeline we originally thought.
[03:17:00] Like what makes success hard is that the
[03:17:02] expectation that society puts because we
[03:17:04] only see the highlight reel. You
[03:17:06] actually only see people after they
[03:17:08] finish the race. People think success is
[03:17:10] like watching a marathon, not running a
[03:17:13] marathon. When you watch a marathon, you
[03:17:15] look at the beginning and you look at
[03:17:16] the end. It only takes you a couple of
[03:17:18] seconds to see both of those. But
[03:17:20] running a marathon is four, five, six
[03:17:23] straight hours of breathing heavy,
[03:17:25] wondering when it's going to end,
[03:17:27] counting, starting to play games in your
[03:17:28] mind of like, okay, I'm I'm 2/ird of the
[03:17:30] way there. I'm two two more quarters of
[03:17:32] that. I'm only one of the of 1/8 of the
[03:17:35] way there. And you keep doing this to
[03:17:37] play tricks on your mind to keep going.
[03:17:39] But the thing is is that in a mile
[03:17:41] marker race, it's very clear to know how
[03:17:43] you're going to get to the finish line
[03:17:44] and how long it's going to take. The
[03:17:46] only difference with success is that you
[03:17:48] just have to keep running and you don't
[03:17:49] know where the finish line is. And
[03:17:51] people will only cheer you on at that
[03:17:53] finish line that they don't know where
[03:17:54] it is either, which means you have to
[03:17:55] get used to running alone. And so the
[03:17:57] difficulty is you have to start running
[03:18:00] and you have to keep running, but you
[03:18:02] just don't know whether you're running
[03:18:04] for a mile or 300. And so this is where
[03:18:07] the pacing is important. So a lot of
[03:18:09] people will run really hard. They'll
[03:18:10] they'll think because they only saw the
[03:18:13] beginning of the marathon on TV and the
[03:18:15] finish of the marathon on TV that they
[03:18:17] can just sprint because both of those
[03:18:19] clips only lasted a couple of seconds.
[03:18:21] So, they start their marathon of success
[03:18:24] of whatever it is they're going after by
[03:18:26] sprinting as hard as they can and then
[03:18:28] they realize that there's no one around
[03:18:30] and there's just a bunch of open road
[03:18:32] ahead of them and they're like, "How
[03:18:33] long is this going to take?" And that's
[03:18:35] when reality sets in. And so, I make
[03:18:37] these videos to say that a lot of times
[03:18:40] it's going to take longer. So, one of
[03:18:42] the big nasty things that you have to
[03:18:45] eliminate on this path is the identity
[03:18:48] that you have about yourself, the isms
[03:18:51] that you claim. And so, for example,
[03:18:53] like, oh, I'm a I'm a neat freak. I'm a
[03:18:57] I'm not good at math. I'm not techy. And
[03:19:00] so, you make these statements and they
[03:19:02] don't serve you. Fundamentally, you
[03:19:04] should have one razor that rules all
[03:19:06] decisions. And I this is this is pretty
[03:19:09] cruel, but it's also the reality of the
[03:19:11] world, which is does this thing person
[03:19:15] belief make it more or less likely that
[03:19:18] I hit my goals? And so if you run every
[03:19:21] single thing you do, the actions you
[03:19:23] take, the people you hang out with, you
[03:19:25] having your phone in the room, you
[03:19:26] saying I'm not techy, does this increase
[03:19:29] or decrease the likelihood that you hit
[03:19:31] your goals? And I'm not saying this to
[03:19:33] preach cuz I had one that I dealt with
[03:19:35] for a long time. So I always considered
[03:19:37] myself to be bad at math. I remember I
[03:19:40] was decent at math and then in nth grade
[03:19:42] I had a really bad teacher and it
[03:19:43] basically put me back a year. Basically
[03:19:45] after algebra I didn't really learn
[03:19:46] anything because the year after that I
[03:19:48] didn't have the the foundations from the
[03:19:49] year before. The difficulty was I kept
[03:19:53] saying after that point I'm just not
[03:19:55] good at math. But when I was in my 20s I
[03:19:58] made the decision that that didn't serve
[03:19:59] me anymore. And so I was like okay well
[03:20:02] what would I have to do to feel like I
[03:20:04] was good at math? And I was like, well,
[03:20:06] people who like can do math in their
[03:20:07] head. I think that's a pretty cool
[03:20:09] thing. And so I didn't use a calculator
[03:20:11] for anything for years. And then I
[03:20:15] learned I mean, I made a lot of mistakes
[03:20:17] in the beginning, but then I got better
[03:20:18] and better at doing math in my head. And
[03:20:21] I would check it obviously after I was
[03:20:23] done, but I always let my head try and
[03:20:25] do it first. And so nowadays, if you
[03:20:27] were to ask people, man, is Alex good at
[03:20:29] math? They're like, dude, he just
[03:20:30] rattles off numbers like crazy. But the
[03:20:32] thing is is that until I was in my 20s,
[03:20:34] I thought I was bad at math. And so it's
[03:20:36] like we are so much more pliable than we
[03:20:38] think we are. And we had something that
[03:20:40] set us on a trajectory a little bit
[03:20:42] earlier in life that just gave us maybe
[03:20:44] a little bit of disadvantage. Fine,
[03:20:46] because you just have to get over it.
[03:20:48] Everyone's childhood was difficult. And
[03:20:50] if you want to win the award for hardest
[03:20:52] childhood, congrats, you win. You feel
[03:20:54] better, right? No one cares about what
[03:20:57] happened to you then. Only what you can
[03:20:59] make happen now. Identity is a lie. We
[03:21:03] only describe people about who they are
[03:21:06] by what they do. Doing is being. And so
[03:21:10] if you want to be somehow different, you
[03:21:12] have to do different things. And then
[03:21:14] only afterwards will people describe you
[03:21:16] based on the actions you take. Think
[03:21:18] about back in the day, the actual names
[03:21:20] people had was he's John the Carpenter,
[03:21:23] he's John the Stonesmith, he's John the
[03:21:26] Mason, right? People literally had their
[03:21:28] names based on what they did. That
[03:21:31] hasn't changed. The first thing you do
[03:21:33] when you meet somebody is you find out
[03:21:34] what do what do you do? And that that
[03:21:36] gives you indications. And if you want
[03:21:37] to describe who someone is, what do you
[03:21:39] say? You describe what they do. And so
[03:21:41] this means that our identity is 100%
[03:21:43] under our control because we control
[03:21:45] what we do. And then only after the fact
[03:21:47] will other people describe you in that
[03:21:49] way. So we covered environmental things
[03:21:51] like with the phone and having a timer.
[03:21:53] We covered interpersonal things in terms
[03:21:55] of our identity and voting with the our
[03:21:57] dollars and time about the things that
[03:21:58] we care about. We eliminated the bad
[03:22:00] people and their opinions about us that
[03:22:03] affect our behavior. And so we've
[03:22:04] eliminated all these things. So now
[03:22:07] we've made room to get started. And the
[03:22:09] good news is you only need three things
[03:22:12] to win. The balls to start, the brains
[03:22:14] to learn, and the heart to never give
[03:22:17] up. And the best thing is you already
[03:22:19] have all three. And for the girls, you
[03:22:21] have gonads. So it's fine. it still
[03:22:22] counts. And so my ask of you is to make
[03:22:25] the commitment. Now this is again the
[03:22:27] elimination of alternatives, to make the
[03:22:29] commitment to never stop. And so it
[03:22:32] doesn't mean that I'm asking you to
[03:22:33] commit to be successful. I'm asking you
[03:22:35] to commit to keep running, to keep
[03:22:37] walking the marathon. Even if you have
[03:22:39] to pant and you have to slow down, you
[03:22:41] just can't stop. And so the best way to
[03:22:44] hit next year's goals is to not wait
[03:22:46] until next year to work on them. Is to
[03:22:48] start now. Because I'll tell you this,
[03:22:50] if you feel like you need a special
[03:22:52] occasion to begin making your life
[03:22:54] better, then it assumes that a special
[03:22:57] occasion must always be there for you to
[03:23:00] want to improve yourself. It shows that
[03:23:03] you don't think today is worth
[03:23:05] improving. And so that means that you
[03:23:07] typically will always cast forward when
[03:23:10] you think things are worth improving.
[03:23:11] And so the easiest way to vote with your
[03:23:13] action is to make today the only day
[03:23:15] that is good because it's the only day
[03:23:17] you have control over. My hot take,
[03:23:20] which shouldn't be, is you don't have to
[03:23:22] wait until January 1st to better
[03:23:24] yourself. And I'm purposely posting this
[03:23:26] before the year ends because I think
[03:23:28] it's stupid to wait. Like why would you
[03:23:31] wait on getting better? Why would you
[03:23:32] like if you had a lottery ticket, why
[03:23:34] would you wait to cash it in? You would
[03:23:36] cash it in as fast as humanly possible.
[03:23:38] And that lottery ticket is the life that
[03:23:40] you want on the other side of this. Why
[03:23:42] would you wait? Here's a harsh truth.
[03:23:44] You're young. You've got time. False.
[03:23:48] All that lie does is extend how long it
[03:23:51] takes people to realize tomorrow isn't
[03:23:53] guaranteed. Nothing is going to be easy.
[03:23:56] Get over it. It takes time to get good.
[03:23:59] And the sooner you start, the sooner you
[03:24:01] act. And the sooner you act, the sooner
[03:24:03] you get. And don't stop until you do.
[03:24:06] And as harsh as that sounds, I do have
[03:24:08] good news. It only takes 20 hours of
[03:24:11] focused effort to get decent at
[03:24:13] anything. The problem is people wait
[03:24:16] years before they start their first
[03:24:18] hour. So many of you could probably
[03:24:20] start achieving next year goals before
[03:24:22] the end of this year. 20 hours is not
[03:24:25] that long. If you're like, man, I really
[03:24:26] want to learn ads. I really want to
[03:24:28] learn how to make content. I really want
[03:24:29] to learn how to edit videos. I really
[03:24:30] want to learn how to sell. You can do
[03:24:32] that now. And you can have that skill.
[03:24:35] like we can onboard a new sales guy in
[03:24:37] in in a few days. There's this massive
[03:24:39] delay that people think because of the
[03:24:41] unknown. They don't know what is going
[03:24:44] to happen and so they therefore assume
[03:24:46] that it's bad. And so the reality is
[03:24:48] that most people don't like surprises
[03:24:50] even if they're good ones. Have you ever
[03:24:52] heard people like, "Oh, I don't like
[03:24:53] surprise parties." It's a [ __ ] party.
[03:24:56] Why would you hate a surprise party
[03:24:59] that's in your favor? You hate it
[03:25:01] because you don't like the unknown. And
[03:25:02] so it's a really good thing to test for
[03:25:04] yourself, which is why would I hate a
[03:25:06] good surprise? You hate it because
[03:25:09] there's a possibility that the surprise
[03:25:10] is negative. But on a long time horizon,
[03:25:13] you know, 85year-old you isn't even
[03:25:15] going to remember it to begin with. This
[03:25:17] is a this is going to be a weird one for
[03:25:18] you, but just stay with me. If you've
[03:25:21] ever been so drunk that you're throwing
[03:25:24] up and you think to yourself, "Man, I'm
[03:25:27] probably not going to remember this."
[03:25:29] The good news is is that once you do
[03:25:32] succeed, that terrible period of
[03:25:34] vomiting or whatever the difficulty is
[03:25:36] that you're going through, it'll
[03:25:37] actually compress in your mind. And so,
[03:25:39] as difficult as it may seem in the
[03:25:41] moment, it actually doesn't stay with
[03:25:42] you. All you'll have left is the thing
[03:25:45] you accomplished, you won't remember the
[03:25:47] work that it took to get there. There'll
[03:25:49] be a significant discount on the
[03:25:50] punishment you endured. I tend to have a
[03:25:53] bad habit of really not looking back
[03:25:55] very much. And so I occasionally will go
[03:25:58] through my photos and I am reminded
[03:26:01] about all of the mistakes and the
[03:26:03] detours that I took along the way to
[03:26:06] where I wanted to go. And I'll tell you
[03:26:07] the story that my father told me when I
[03:26:08] was uh very impatient. He said, "Listen,
[03:26:12] you think that this is taking too long
[03:26:14] for you to be successful?" He said, "Do
[03:26:16] you know how long it took me to become a
[03:26:18] doctor?" And I was like, "No." He's
[03:26:21] like, "Well, so my father's a run-in,
[03:26:24] and he left the country to get educated,
[03:26:28] and there was a program for anybody
[03:26:29] who's a run-in that the government would
[03:26:30] pay for your schooling as long as you
[03:26:32] came back with the education." Now, the
[03:26:34] revolution occurred during the time he
[03:26:36] was away. So, he actually never got to
[03:26:37] go back. He went to uh France, Paris, to
[03:26:41] try and enter medical school. Only
[03:26:43] problem, he didn't speak French. And so
[03:26:46] he's trying to do premed in another
[03:26:48] language as somebody who doesn't even
[03:26:50] share the same alphabet. And so he
[03:26:52] failed that year. He then took a the
[03:26:56] second year he tried again because
[03:26:57] you're allowed in in in France. It's a
[03:26:59] different system. You could just
[03:26:59] basically try as many times as you want.
[03:27:01] He started again and the second year he
[03:27:04] failed again and then he talked to his
[03:27:06] brother and he's like, "I don't know if
[03:27:07] being a doctor is for me. Like I just
[03:27:09] feel like imagine this like failing two
[03:27:11] full years in a row." and his brother
[03:27:14] said, "Hey, why don't you go to Belgium?
[03:27:15] You know, change the environment, you
[03:27:17] know, different different school,
[03:27:18] different people. Go there." So, he went
[03:27:21] to Belgium and then his third try, he
[03:27:23] made it past his first year. Now, mind
[03:27:25] you, at this point, he had two years of
[03:27:27] learning French and so he was able to
[03:27:29] finally actually understand what the
[03:27:30] professor was saying. So, was it that he
[03:27:33] wasn't smart enough to understand how to
[03:27:36] become a doctor or was it that he just
[03:27:38] had other skills that he lacked along
[03:27:40] the way? And so a lot of people right
[03:27:42] now are judging the fact that they
[03:27:43] didn't succeed because they somehow
[03:27:45] think it's some innate trait. I'm not
[03:27:47] smart enough. I'm not good enough. But
[03:27:49] sometimes you just lack some
[03:27:50] prerequisite skills, right? Like if
[03:27:52] you're like trying to learn calculus and
[03:27:54] you've never done arithmetic before,
[03:27:55] it's going to be really hard, right?
[03:27:57] Dare I say impossible. And so if you
[03:27:59] jump straight into calculus, you're not
[03:28:01] going to win. So sometimes you have to
[03:28:03] take two steps back in order to build
[03:28:04] the foundation to get forward. Now, I'm
[03:28:07] going to keep the story going. So he
[03:28:08] then graduates in uh you know seven
[03:28:11] years because how long it takes the
[03:28:12] actual medical school system is
[03:28:14] different in in in in uh in Europe. They
[03:28:16] actually do college and the the next
[03:28:18] degree all is one thing. So 7 years
[03:28:20] later he graduates. Okay. Then he's this
[03:28:23] Iranian dude can't go back to his own
[03:28:25] country. Meets a girl in Belgium. She
[03:28:27] says I'm from the US. And so he comes
[03:28:29] back to the US with the lady who would
[03:28:32] eventually become my mother. And when
[03:28:35] he's in the US, he then his doctor, his
[03:28:38] his MD doesn't apply here. So he then
[03:28:42] has to basically do it again in the
[03:28:44] United States. And in order to do this,
[03:28:46] you have to get a residency. Now,
[03:28:48] getting a residency as someone who's a
[03:28:50] foreigner back then was pretty tough.
[03:28:53] And so it took him two years where he
[03:28:55] had to basically work minimum wage jobs.
[03:28:56] He was like uh he had to like run slides
[03:28:59] like radiology slides back and forth as
[03:29:01] like a runner, a courier. when he was a
[03:29:03] full surgeon, but he couldn't do it here
[03:29:05] in the US. And so imagine how
[03:29:07] emasculineating it is, right? Where your
[03:29:10] wife comes back, she's able, she was a
[03:29:12] US citizen and had all this other stuff,
[03:29:14] right? And she could, she got her
[03:29:15] internship immediately because uh she
[03:29:17] was US and she was a girl, whatever. And
[03:29:19] my father didn't. And so he then had to
[03:29:22] do two more years where he didn't have
[03:29:25] progress. So he he told me the whole
[03:29:26] story and then eventually obviously he
[03:29:27] got the he got the residency and then he
[03:29:29] was able to get in the path. But if you
[03:29:30] look at that, he basically had four or
[03:29:32] five years of his life where there was
[03:29:34] basically no net gain in progress
[03:29:37] towards his goals. And so he's telling
[03:29:39] me this story when he's 50 and he's
[03:29:41] like, "Look at my life now." He's like,
[03:29:43] "No one knows." He's like, "No one asks
[03:29:45] me how long it took. They just know what
[03:29:47] I have now and what I can do now." And
[03:29:49] so you have this idea that it's that it
[03:29:52] should take a certain period of time. It
[03:29:55] it should only last this long. It should
[03:29:57] be this level of difficulty. But the
[03:29:59] thing is is just that that level of
[03:30:01] perseverance when he decided to go out
[03:30:03] on his own and start his own practice
[03:30:05] rather than and and left the practice
[03:30:06] that he was working in he then didn't
[03:30:09] know anyone and he still had a heavy
[03:30:11] accent was a new guy in a new area and
[03:30:13] it took him time to build up. And what
[03:30:14] did he do? My dad learned how to be a
[03:30:16] general contractor. He built his own
[03:30:18] surgical center because he couldn't
[03:30:19] afford having these outsourced third
[03:30:21] parties that charge $250,000 to build a
[03:30:23] surgery center. He built his his for a
[03:30:25] fraction of that. And so as my dad going
[03:30:27] to Home Depot, measuring and figuring
[03:30:29] these things out as a full plastic
[03:30:30] surgeon, it's not about the resources
[03:30:33] you have. It's about how resourceful
[03:30:34] you're willing to be right now. Getting
[03:30:37] started is 100% under your control. And
[03:30:40] I love taking this frame, which is that
[03:30:42] every self-made billionaire is
[03:30:44] self-made. Now, if you're like, wait,
[03:30:46] there are billionaires who aren't
[03:30:47] self-made, right? That's why I didn't
[03:30:49] say all billionaires. Every self-made
[03:30:52] billionaire is self-made. And every
[03:30:54] self-made millionaire is self-made. And
[03:30:57] here's the one people hate. Every
[03:30:59] self-made person in poverty is
[03:31:01] self-made. Now, that may make you feel
[03:31:04] uncomfortable. And you know what? You
[03:31:06] may be right. You probably did have more
[03:31:08] disadvantages. You probably did have
[03:31:10] things that worked against you. And now
[03:31:12] what? You're right. So that's it then
[03:31:16] for you. The rest of your life will
[03:31:18] never go the way you want it to go. The
[03:31:20] harsh truth here is if you want to feel
[03:31:22] better, blame others. If you want to get
[03:31:26] better, blame yourself. And so my father
[03:31:29] told me that story multiple times in my
[03:31:32] life, as I'm sure your fathers have told
[03:31:34] you stories multiple times in your life,
[03:31:35] or you had a parent or an uncle or a
[03:31:37] brother, and they told you those big
[03:31:38] meaningful stories. And so I'll tell you
[03:31:40] another time he told me it. So after I
[03:31:43] lost everything for the second time,
[03:31:46] think about like I tell the story, but
[03:31:48] it's very easy to gloss over, but think
[03:31:51] about this. I had left my job, went to a
[03:31:55] new area, didn't know anyone, started a
[03:31:57] gym, didn't have enough money to have an
[03:31:58] apartment, slept at my gym, just
[03:32:00] grassroots got it going, made the gym
[03:32:02] successful by working there every hour
[03:32:04] of the day. Was finally successful
[03:32:06] enough to be able to open a second
[03:32:07] location, a third, a fourth, a fifth, a
[03:32:08] sixth. finally feel like I I tasted the
[03:32:11] success, like I'm actually doing
[03:32:12] something. I'm actually pretty good
[03:32:13] here. Like that bet that I made actually
[03:32:15] paid off and then I lose it all. And so
[03:32:19] I I I sell all those locations. I put
[03:32:21] the money in a new thing and then it's
[03:32:23] gone. And so I could look back and say,
[03:32:27] "Wow, I just spent all those years and I
[03:32:30] actually have nothing to show for it.
[03:32:32] The only thing I would have had to show
[03:32:34] was the money that I made." But my
[03:32:36] father retold me that story and he said
[03:32:38] it was never about the amount of
[03:32:40] failures failures he had. It was about
[03:32:42] the education that he had. And so one of
[03:32:44] the other repeated fatherisms that he
[03:32:46] gave me was that education is the only
[03:32:49] thing that no one can take from you. The
[03:32:51] skills you have, the skills you acquire
[03:32:53] along the way are the only thing that
[03:32:55] are truly yours. There's nothing else in
[03:32:57] this world that actually belongs to you.
[03:33:00] Your your clothes can get stolen. the
[03:33:02] belongings you have. And he said this
[03:33:04] from a place of reality, which is my
[03:33:07] family came from a country that took all
[03:33:09] of our assets. They seized everything.
[03:33:11] They seized land. They seized homes.
[03:33:13] They seized wealth. They just said, "Oh
[03:33:15] yeah, all that that's ours now. Good
[03:33:18] luck." This may not be as real for
[03:33:20] people in the United States. But having
[03:33:23] people who everyone in my family had
[03:33:25] everything taken from them that is very
[03:33:28] evident in how they talked to me and how
[03:33:31] I've always seen the world as these
[03:33:33] things are ephemeral these material
[03:33:35] goods the studio the setup the lights
[03:33:37] the whatever the platforms
[03:33:39] like gone but the thing is is that my
[03:33:43] father came here with $1,000 because of
[03:33:45] the revolution and had nothing and built
[03:33:46] the life he has and you can lose it all
[03:33:49] and gain it back. And so we've seen so
[03:33:52] many entrepreneurs who've actually lived
[03:33:53] through this cycle. It's actually a
[03:33:55] common thing in entrepreneurship. And
[03:33:56] it's because you have to understand and
[03:33:58] respect risk. The beauty of it is that
[03:34:02] after you fail, the likelihood that
[03:34:03] you're successful goes up, not down.
[03:34:06] This is the part that people miss. They
[03:34:08] fail and think it somehow decreases the
[03:34:10] likelihood of success, but it actually
[03:34:11] increases it. And so it's like you want
[03:34:13] to just get the failures out of the way.
[03:34:14] Why would you not want something that
[03:34:15] increases the likelihood at your goal?
[03:34:17] And the reason that it increases that
[03:34:18] likelihood is that failure
[03:34:21] is a requisite
[03:34:23] probability for taking action. And so
[03:34:26] anyone who has failed has taken more
[03:34:28] action than someone who's done nothing.
[03:34:29] Which means it increases the likelihood
[03:34:31] that they are successful. And so when
[03:34:33] you fail, you get feedback. And when you
[03:34:35] get feedback, you get better. And when
[03:34:37] you get better, it increases the
[03:34:38] likelihood you win. Losers
[03:34:41] stay losers by never being willing to
[03:34:44] lose.
[03:34:46] Everyone loses before they win. And so
[03:34:48] there's this great moment in the Matrix,
[03:34:50] which is the the famous jump where Neo
[03:34:52] is trying to jump across the buildings
[03:34:54] and everyone's gathered around because
[03:34:56] they think he's the one. He obviously
[03:34:58] takes the jump and he falls and they're
[03:35:01] like, "Ah, what does it mean? What does
[03:35:02] it mean?" And Cipher, who ended up
[03:35:04] eventually being the Judas of this,
[03:35:06] says, "Everybody falls the first time."
[03:35:08] And so even the one or the person who
[03:35:10] was going to become the one was somebody
[03:35:13] who had to fail first. And I love that
[03:35:15] because everyone falls the first time.
[03:35:17] Your first business is very unlikely to
[03:35:19] be your last business. The first product
[03:35:21] you have will be a product that you'll
[03:35:23] be embarrassed of years from now. But
[03:35:25] what's important is having the product,
[03:35:27] getting the product, building the
[03:35:28] product, launching the product, shooting
[03:35:30] the shot. And so if you're never willing
[03:35:32] to lose, you're never going to win. So,
[03:35:35] in 2025, if you start a podcast or you
[03:35:37] start making content, you start doing
[03:35:39] cold outbound or you you you you take a
[03:35:41] new job, whatever it is, just remember
[03:35:43] that your second try after you fail,
[03:35:45] which you inevitably will, takes twice
[03:35:48] the emotional effort, but half the
[03:35:50] actual effort. So, you'll fail and
[03:35:52] you'll emotionally feel bad. But guess
[03:35:54] what you did? You actually gripped your
[03:35:56] hands on the unknown and you go from
[03:35:59] unknown optimism to known pessimism. So
[03:36:02] it's like okay now I know what it takes
[03:36:05] I now have realistic expectations what
[03:36:08] is required in order to be successful
[03:36:10] and although it may be bigger than I
[03:36:13] originally thought I now can quantify
[03:36:15] what is required to win and so here's
[03:36:18] the thing the best entrepreneurs in the
[03:36:20] world have the biggest failure resumes
[03:36:23] and so I don't even want you to win I
[03:36:25] want you to build your failure resume
[03:36:26] and so if you're like oh it must be easy
[03:36:28] for you to say I lost money on my first
[03:36:30] two real estate deals I ever did. Almost
[03:36:32] lost all the money I put in. I've lost
[03:36:34] money on crypto when I put it in years
[03:36:36] ago. I lost money on uh bad hires. I've
[03:36:39] lost millions in bad hires, actual hard
[03:36:41] costs, not soft costs. I've had six
[03:36:44] failed businesses. I've had nine failed
[03:36:45] partnerships. And so I bring these
[03:36:47] things up because like you're not going
[03:36:49] to hit it out of the park on the first
[03:36:50] shot. But the crazy thing about how
[03:36:52] success works is that you only need to
[03:36:54] win once. That's the crazy part is you
[03:36:57] only have to win once. I'll read you
[03:36:58] this quote from Jeff Bezos, which is
[03:37:00] what I started my first book, $100
[03:37:02] million Offers, with. We all know that
[03:37:04] if you swing for the fences, you're
[03:37:06] going to strike out a lot, but you're
[03:37:08] also going to hit some home runs. The
[03:37:10] difference between baseball and
[03:37:11] business, however, is that baseball has
[03:37:13] a truncated outcome distribution. When
[03:37:15] you swing, no matter how well you
[03:37:17] connect with the ball, the most runs you
[03:37:19] can hit is four. In business, every once
[03:37:22] in a while, when you step up to the
[03:37:23] plate, you can score 1,000 runs. This
[03:37:27] longtail distribution of returns is why
[03:37:29] it's important to be bold. Big winners
[03:37:31] pay for so many experiments. And when he
[03:37:33] says big winners pay, they pay in
[03:37:36] failures. They pay in the scars that
[03:37:39] they have to incur and endure along to
[03:37:42] hitting it out of the park and hitting
[03:37:44] it out so big that they never have to
[03:37:46] swing again. And so I want to make this
[03:37:47] as real as I possibly can. I just found
[03:37:50] an old note from myself to myself that's
[03:37:54] 12 years old. And so I talked about my
[03:37:57] $10,000 per month income goal. And
[03:37:59] reading it got me actually pretty choked
[03:38:01] up. This is all to say that no matter
[03:38:03] where you're at in your journey, you've
[03:38:05] just got to believe with all your
[03:38:06] [ __ ] heart that you're going to make
[03:38:07] it because no one else is going to
[03:38:09] believe for you. Because you can never
[03:38:11] expect someone to invest in you more
[03:38:13] than you invest in yourself. And the
[03:38:14] crazy thing is some people say they kill
[03:38:17] for a shot or they die for a chance when
[03:38:19] in reality they won't even wake up 60
[03:38:21] minutes earlier for it. So, we've
[03:38:22] eliminated the distractions, all of the
[03:38:24] things associated with not doing this
[03:38:26] stuff. And now, hopefully, I've removed
[03:38:29] some of the mental BS around getting
[03:38:31] started. And so, now once you start, you
[03:38:33] got to get better. Connections, money,
[03:38:36] looks, intelligence, those are all
[03:38:38] great, but you can beat someone with all
[03:38:41] of those things if they have only one
[03:38:43] trait. An insatiable desire to improve.
[03:38:47] No matter where they start, it's hard to
[03:38:49] beat someone who improves every second
[03:38:51] of every day without giving up. And this
[03:38:53] is why earlier I said ambitious people
[03:38:56] buy skills and they pay for those skills
[03:38:58] with time and money. And in order to
[03:39:00] have the time and money to invest in
[03:39:02] those skills, they have to take them
[03:39:04] from somewhere else. Because the thing
[03:39:06] is is that your resources are zero sum.
[03:39:09] And this is something that a lot of
[03:39:10] people aren't comfortable with. Whatever
[03:39:11] you choose to spend your time on, you
[03:39:13] take from something else. Whatever you
[03:39:14] choose to spend your money on, you take
[03:39:16] from something else. And so, most people
[03:39:18] don't have a resources issue. They have
[03:39:20] a priorities problem. You are choosing
[03:39:23] to say that other things are more
[03:39:25] important. And hey, I want to be real.
[03:39:26] If that stuff is more important to you,
[03:39:28] then amazing. You want it life.
[03:39:29] Congratulations. But if you don't have
[03:39:31] what you want and you're spending money
[03:39:34] to proliferate a life that is not the
[03:39:36] one you want to lead, then you need to
[03:39:38] shift the list to invest the time and
[03:39:41] money and pull from those things that
[03:39:43] you don't want to put more in the ones
[03:39:44] you do. And you want to starve out
[03:39:46] failure. So think about this. One of the
[03:39:48] easiest ways to to have more money is to
[03:39:52] work more hours. And you're like, how is
[03:39:54] that possible? Well, when you work more
[03:39:56] hours, it actually kills two birds. One
[03:39:59] is that you actually make more money
[03:40:01] when you work more hours, but on top of
[03:40:03] that, you don't spend money because you
[03:40:06] have less time to spend it. And so every
[03:40:08] hour of work is a net positive in two
[03:40:10] directions. So it saves you money you're
[03:40:12] not spending and makes you money. And so
[03:40:15] you want to find those little twists
[03:40:17] that you can make in your investments of
[03:40:19] time and money that are outsized. It's
[03:40:21] not just that you gain, you also stop
[03:40:24] the loss. I've always been willing to
[03:40:26] bet big on me. And so, a lot of you guys
[03:40:30] are trying to like bet big on Dogecoin
[03:40:32] or some meme thing or like some
[03:40:34] get-richqu. And I promise you, the guys
[03:40:36] who have all the money know how to do it
[03:40:38] better than you. And if you have your
[03:40:39] last thousand or 5,000 or $10,000 that
[03:40:41] you're like, "What do I do with it?" Bet
[03:40:43] on you cuz you'll never sell you. You're
[03:40:46] a long-term hold, right? And so, if you
[03:40:48] get better, you guarantee the win. And
[03:40:51] every investment you make compounds. You
[03:40:53] guarantee compounding because every
[03:40:54] skill stacks on top of other skills.
[03:40:57] Steve Jobs talked about how when he went
[03:40:59] to college and learned calligraphy, it
[03:41:00] was the reason that fonts showed up in
[03:41:02] the Mac later. And so he talks about you
[03:41:04] can only connect the dots looking back.
[03:41:07] You want to double down on investing
[03:41:09] more into you getting skills. And I'll
[03:41:11] tell you something that you probably
[03:41:12] don't know. So I spent $10,000 and I
[03:41:16] only had 50 saved up after years of
[03:41:19] being a consultant. So I had $50,000
[03:41:20] saved up. was 23 years old. It was my
[03:41:23] life savings. I spent $10,000 to get a
[03:41:26] gym coach. I joined a mastermind for gym
[03:41:29] owners. Fun fact, though, I didn't have
[03:41:32] a gym. But I figured if I go to a
[03:41:34] mastermind of gym owners, I'm going to
[03:41:36] learn so many of the things that they
[03:41:38] made mistakes on when they started their
[03:41:39] gym. They're they're going to have
[03:41:40] opinions on how I should lay out the
[03:41:42] square footage, what what locations I
[03:41:44] should pick, what model I should use.
[03:41:46] And so rather than say, "Oh, I'm just
[03:41:47] going to find out all these failures on
[03:41:49] my own my own and and take five times as
[03:41:51] long," I was like, "I'd rather pay
[03:41:53] $10,000 to pull five years forward into
[03:41:55] the present." And so I was able to get
[03:41:56] that first location up and profitable
[03:41:59] and outsource by month nine. Now, some
[03:42:01] of the guys in the mastermind were at
[03:42:03] year five and still hadn't done that. I
[03:42:05] pay down my ignorance tax as much as I
[03:42:08] possibly can because the cost of you not
[03:42:12] being able to achieve your dreams, the
[03:42:14] price is ignorance. And the debt that
[03:42:17] you pay is the distance between where
[03:42:19] you are and how much you'd be making if
[03:42:22] you knew how to do it. I I've told this
[03:42:24] story before, but I think it's so it's
[03:42:25] it's something that's so ingrained in
[03:42:27] how I think in terms of how I price what
[03:42:29] I'm willing to pay in time or money. And
[03:42:31] before I tell that story, I move
[03:42:34] geographically whenever I see an
[03:42:36] opportunity to get around someone who's
[03:42:38] better than me. And so when I wanted to
[03:42:40] learn fitness stuff, I moved to an area
[03:42:42] where I knew there was other fitness
[03:42:43] entrepreneurs that I was like, "Well,
[03:42:44] maybe I'll be able to hang out with them
[03:42:45] a little bit and I'll learn a little bit
[03:42:46] there." And I went to a city that I
[03:42:47] didn't know anything about. I knew no
[03:42:49] one. And when I wanted to when I wanted
[03:42:51] to uh get in the gym space, I said,
[03:42:53] "Well, California is like the capital of
[03:42:55] fitness, SoCal. So, I'm gonna move out
[03:42:57] to Southern California because the best
[03:42:58] guys will be there. and if I can win
[03:43:00] there, I'll be able to win anywhere. And
[03:43:01] so I moved out to California without
[03:43:02] knowing anyone. Whenever I've had these
[03:43:04] big transitions in my life is not only
[03:43:07] being willing to bet with my money and
[03:43:10] bet with my time, but also bet with my
[03:43:12] geographic location. I'm willing to risk
[03:43:14] losing the relationships that I had to
[03:43:17] gain relationships that I need. And so
[03:43:19] 2025 for you might mean that you have to
[03:43:21] leave where you're at. And that could
[03:43:23] mean across town, but it could also mean
[03:43:24] across the country or even across into a
[03:43:26] different country. It may mean that
[03:43:27] you're going to spend take all this
[03:43:28] money that you used to spend here and
[03:43:30] spend it in an entirely different way.
[03:43:32] You probably are going to have less
[03:43:33] stuff and that's okay because that stuff
[03:43:37] only deteriorates. It only gets worse.
[03:43:39] But you will only get better. Don't
[03:43:41] invest in Dogecoin. Don't even invest in
[03:43:43] the S&P 500. Invest instead in the SME
[03:43:47] 500. Invest in you because you will
[03:43:49] always beat a 10% return in the stock
[03:43:51] market. And if you think that Dogecoin
[03:43:54] is going to out compete your personal
[03:43:56] growth, you're never going to win.
[03:43:58] Anyone can get rich fast as long as
[03:44:00] you're willing to make no money for a
[03:44:02] long period of time while you work to
[03:44:04] get good enough to get rich fast. And so
[03:44:07] I told you I'll tell you that story. The
[03:44:08] story goes like this. A guy is actually
[03:44:10] using this as a sales close to an
[03:44:12] audience. He wrote a million dollars on
[03:44:15] a whiteboard in front of an audience.
[03:44:17] And so then he called out to a lady in
[03:44:18] the front row and he said, "How much do
[03:44:19] you make, ma'am?" and she said,"
[03:44:21] $50,000.
[03:44:23] And he said, "Okay,
[03:44:25] well, right now you pay reality $950,000
[03:44:31] every single year for not knowing how to
[03:44:34] make a million." And when I saw that, I
[03:44:38] realized that the value of the skill of
[03:44:40] making a million dollars is the
[03:44:42] difference between what I'm making and
[03:44:44] what I could be making. And people
[03:44:46] wildly undervalue how much more they
[03:44:49] could be making once they have a skill.
[03:44:51] And so if you're the type of person who
[03:44:54] can actually follow instructions, show
[03:44:56] up on time, smile, be able to fail and
[03:45:00] keep going, virtually all education will
[03:45:03] net you a positive yield. Because let me
[03:45:05] ask you a question. Would you pay
[03:45:07] $950,000
[03:45:08] to make a million dollars and be able to
[03:45:10] make a million dollars every year? Well,
[03:45:13] that would be an insane deal. You pay it
[03:45:14] once and you get the skill forever. So
[03:45:16] every year after that you make a million
[03:45:18] dollars a year. Well, of course you
[03:45:20] should. Now, once you make the million
[03:45:21] dollars a year, are you willing to give
[03:45:23] a 100% of what you make to make $10
[03:45:24] million a year? Of course you should.
[03:45:26] And that's why education is by far the
[03:45:29] highest return. You can learn how to
[03:45:31] make a million a year for probably close
[03:45:34] to $200,000 a year. And you're like,
[03:45:36] "Well, well, where where do I spend
[03:45:38] that?" You'll spend that on conferences.
[03:45:39] You'll spend it on seminars. and it'll
[03:45:41] likely be in 2,000 to to 5,000 sometimes
[03:45:46] $30,000 chunks. But for some reason,
[03:45:50] you're willing to spend this on some
[03:45:52] academic who hasn't been in reality for
[03:45:54] 20 years cuz they're on tenure and
[03:45:55] thinks that the world uh is just going
[03:45:58] to hand you stuff because that's their
[03:45:59] reality because they're government
[03:46:01] funded. Or you can pay money to people
[03:46:05] who live in real private businesses who
[03:46:07] do this stuff for a living. And here's
[03:46:09] the thing. I have never paid for
[03:46:11] education and not gotten more than what
[03:46:13] I paid for. Now, I don't want to
[03:46:16] conflate that with the fact that I've
[03:46:18] paid for things that I didn't think was
[03:46:20] worth that money to other people. But I
[03:46:22] always ask myself, okay, number one, how
[03:46:25] can I become the best student who's ever
[03:46:27] gone through this? How do I become this
[03:46:29] person's number one success story? And
[03:46:31] I've told every program, every partner,
[03:46:33] every vendor that I've ever worked with,
[03:46:35] I will be your biggest success story.
[03:46:37] And so the reality is once I am their
[03:46:39] biggest success story, is that because
[03:46:41] of them or because of me? And I think
[03:46:43] that's a choice that you get to make. Am
[03:46:45] I going to be the number one success
[03:46:46] story or do I want to be right and prove
[03:46:49] that they're not good? Well,
[03:46:50] congratulations. Maybe they're not that
[03:46:52] good. Well, what does that leave you
[03:46:54] with? No skills and less money. If you
[03:46:56] choose to succeed anyways and say, "What
[03:46:59] can I learn from this person? Because
[03:47:00] I've learned just as much from bad
[03:47:02] people as I have from good." Because a
[03:47:04] lot of times getting good is actually
[03:47:06] the removal of bad. And so if you find
[03:47:08] out other ways that people do a terrible
[03:47:10] job, it's also a wonderful way of
[03:47:12] figuring out how to not do a terrible
[03:47:13] job. And so if I want to create a
[03:47:15] product that's exceptional and I say,
[03:47:17] let's say I want to put a phone, a
[03:47:19] camera, the internet, email, all in one
[03:47:22] place. If you remove all of the stuff
[03:47:24] that sucks from all of those things,
[03:47:26] what you're left with is an iPhone. Most
[03:47:28] times you can always get more than what
[03:47:31] you pay for when you invest in you. So
[03:47:34] let's get really tactical. If you really
[03:47:37] want to double down on you, which will
[03:47:38] by far I mean think about this 10%
[03:47:40] improvement is the S&P 500. So you're
[03:47:42] saying that you could take Okay, let's
[03:47:44] be real. Let's do let's do real math. So
[03:47:49] let's say that you've got $10,000 saved
[03:47:52] up. Okay, let's say that's what your
[03:47:54] savings is, which by the way makes you
[03:47:56] like a top 40% American, FYI. So, let's
[03:47:59] say you've got $10,000 saved up. You
[03:48:02] could put in the S&P 500 and have that
[03:48:05] $10,000 be 10,900
[03:48:08] one year later. Or you can spend that on
[03:48:12] something that can triple your earning
[03:48:14] capacity. And next year, instead of
[03:48:17] making, let's say, $50,000 a year, you
[03:48:20] make $100,000 a year. Well, which of
[03:48:23] these increases the $50,000 plus
[03:48:25] increase is more than the net of the
[03:48:29] 900? Because you lost the 10, you spent
[03:48:32] the whole thing here. You invested it.
[03:48:34] Here you spent it. But did you spend it
[03:48:36] or did you invest it in asset you could
[03:48:38] control? And so I don't know about you,
[03:48:40] but I'd rather have the extra 50 and put
[03:48:43] the 10 in. And then what do I do next
[03:48:44] year? I'm going to take this 50
[03:48:48] and I'm going to ask myself, is there
[03:48:50] anything I could put this $50,000 into?
[03:48:52] So, I could put in the S&P 500 and I
[03:48:54] could go and add myself an extra uh
[03:48:57] 5,000 uh $55,000, whatever. Let's say I
[03:49:00] get 10% that year. Okay, so I get 55,000
[03:49:03] this year. Or I could put that 50K into
[03:49:05] 10 five 10K things or two 25K things and
[03:49:09] all of a sudden take my earning power
[03:49:10] from 100K to 250K.
[03:49:14] Wow, what a deal. But I'm gonna lose the
[03:49:16] whole 50 again. And so the thing is is
[03:49:18] that on my way up, I basically took my
[03:49:20] savings and I spent it almost every year
[03:49:22] on education because why on earth would
[03:49:25] I want the future to take longer to get
[03:49:26] to me? When you buy skills, it's the
[03:49:29] closest approximation to buying time.
[03:49:32] And so there's this big thing like you
[03:49:33] can't buy time. False. You can buy the
[03:49:37] future at a discount. and you buy the
[03:49:39] future at a discount by buying the
[03:49:41] skills required in order to get there
[03:49:43] faster. And so if it could take you five
[03:49:46] years if you did it on your own or it
[03:49:48] could take you one year if you paid four
[03:49:49] different people to help you out with
[03:49:50] each step of the process, why would you
[03:49:52] not want to pay all of the money you
[03:49:54] have to get to there and then have four
[03:49:56] years of gain with that new baseline.
[03:49:58] You now are living four years, 5 years
[03:50:01] into the future. It's like you skipping
[03:50:03] from being 20 to 25 and you getting the
[03:50:05] earning power at 25 plus, but now you're
[03:50:06] just 21. And then when you're at that
[03:50:09] point, you pull the next 5 years for it.
[03:50:10] And when you're 22, it's like living
[03:50:11] like you're 30, right? Like now at that
[03:50:14] point though, you might spend all your
[03:50:15] savings yet again. And this process has
[03:50:17] been one that I have consistently done
[03:50:19] for the entirety of my career. And it
[03:50:20] just gets to a point where you can't
[03:50:22] even spend the money. And so my very
[03:50:24] controversial advice is spend all your
[03:50:27] money on education for as long as you
[03:50:30] possibly can until you can't even spend
[03:50:32] the money because you're making too much
[03:50:34] of it. And so how do you become an
[03:50:36] expert? you do more repetitions than
[03:50:38] anyone else in a narrow field, which
[03:50:40] also means you fail more times than
[03:50:42] anyone else in a narrow field. And so,
[03:50:44] if you want to beat someone, just try 10
[03:50:46] times harder than them. And you only
[03:50:48] really need to try two or three times
[03:50:50] harder, but you probably don't realize
[03:50:52] how much harder they're trying than you
[03:50:54] are. So, try 10 times harder just to
[03:50:56] make sure you win. People reject this
[03:50:59] idea that someone can work 10 times or
[03:51:01] 100 times harder. But I define work as
[03:51:05] output. And so for you to say that
[03:51:07] someone can't produce 10 times more than
[03:51:09] you is just factually false. There's
[03:51:11] tons of people who produce 10 times
[03:51:13] more. There's tons of people who produce
[03:51:14] 100 times more than you. I'll give you
[03:51:16] the easiest example in the world. A lot
[03:51:18] of departments run on weekly cadences.
[03:51:20] They say do this thing by end of week.
[03:51:22] Often times you can ask that person how
[03:51:24] many hours will this really take you?
[03:51:26] And then that person will say something
[03:51:27] like I don't know three or four hours.
[03:51:29] You say okay well why don't you just get
[03:51:31] it done by noon. And then at noon you
[03:51:33] say okay what's the next thing gonna
[03:51:35] take? and they'd say, "Uh, probably
[03:51:36] another 3 or 4 hours." You say, "Cool,
[03:51:38] get it done by the end of the day." Now,
[03:51:39] from those two cycles, that would have
[03:51:41] normally taken 2 weeks or 14 days, but
[03:51:44] instead it got done in one. And so, just
[03:51:46] right there, you got something done. You
[03:51:49] got 14 times more done than the
[03:51:52] competitor who's doing things on a
[03:51:53] weekly basis. And so, this is how you
[03:51:55] drag the future to the present is that
[03:51:57] you're not focusing on how hard you're
[03:51:58] working, you're focusing how much you're
[03:51:59] getting done. You'd be amazed at how
[03:52:02] much better you get after you've done it
[03:52:04] a hundred times. If you want to win, do
[03:52:07] it again. I want to be clear. You don't
[03:52:09] just post a hundred videos in a row and
[03:52:11] see what happens. You post one, see what
[03:52:13] worked, and then try and do more of that
[03:52:15] thing. And so, the idea isn't just raw
[03:52:18] effort. It's raw effort with an
[03:52:20] improvement loop. And so I remember one
[03:52:23] of my favorite words that I have to
[03:52:25] teach sales guys because it's a very
[03:52:26] repetitive task to teach someone how to
[03:52:28] sell is great, do it again, great again.
[03:52:34] Great job again. And so it's that
[03:52:36] repetition that breeds the nuance of
[03:52:38] skill. And you want it to be so drilled
[03:52:40] into you that you no longer have to
[03:52:43] consciously think about how to do the
[03:52:45] thing because you can then do it as a
[03:52:47] natural skill so that you can move on to
[03:52:49] putting your attention to the next
[03:52:50] skill. So it's not just about learning
[03:52:52] how to do it once. It's about learning
[03:52:53] how to do it so many times that you
[03:52:55] don't have to think about doing it at
[03:52:56] all. Especially if you're starting out,
[03:52:58] your goal should not be passive income.
[03:53:00] Mainly because you don't have enough
[03:53:01] money for the passive income to mean
[03:53:03] anything. Instead, you should learn how
[03:53:05] to make money while you're awake before
[03:53:07] trying to learn how to make it while you
[03:53:08] sleep. You crawl, then you walk, then
[03:53:11] you run. Once you have more money than
[03:53:13] you can possibly reinvest in education
[03:53:15] and acquiring more skills, then you can
[03:53:17] take the leftover and put that into your
[03:53:20] passive income pool. And so, very, very
[03:53:22] tactically, this is what I'll walk you
[03:53:23] through. You should have an education
[03:53:25] investment budget. And so, just like you
[03:53:27] spend X dollars per month, so let's say
[03:53:28] you we pull all of your expenses down
[03:53:30] and you're making an extra $1,000 a
[03:53:32] month. Okay? Now, if you're not eating
[03:53:34] out, you're not buying new clothes,
[03:53:35] you're not going out with the boys,
[03:53:37] you're not spending money in stupid
[03:53:38] ways, that if that's what you're doing,
[03:53:40] then you're going to have $1,000 left.
[03:53:42] If you have that, then you can take that
[03:53:44] money and every month you can put it
[03:53:46] towards a bank account that you can
[03:53:48] either choose to immediately spend or
[03:53:50] save up for something that is more
[03:53:51] expensive. And I can tell you that a lot
[03:53:54] of what I learned when I when I bought
[03:53:56] programs and seminars and conferences
[03:53:58] and things like that wasn't even from
[03:54:00] the content itself, but it was
[03:54:02] connections that I was able to make at
[03:54:03] those types of events that I was then
[03:54:06] able to leverage the one skill I had,
[03:54:08] which I was good at sales, and then
[03:54:10] start giving that away to every person I
[03:54:12] met so that I could collect those IUs
[03:54:14] and then learn skills for free. And so
[03:54:17] it's like I really just needed a ticket
[03:54:18] to get in the room and then I could
[03:54:20] trade with everybody else with the
[03:54:22] skills I had to then get to learn
[03:54:23] theirs. And so as wild as this sounds,
[03:54:26] at the end of 2025, you could be dead
[03:54:29] broke but rich in skills. And so let's
[03:54:31] say at the end of next year, you
[03:54:33] actually have no more money, but you now
[03:54:35] have the ability to make more money. And
[03:54:37] so just like my father had to start over
[03:54:39] from nothing after losing everything, he
[03:54:42] didn't lose everything. He still had the
[03:54:43] most valuable thing he had, which is
[03:54:45] that he was a surgeon. And so he knew a
[03:54:47] skill and he could make it work here
[03:54:49] like he'd make it work there. And that
[03:54:50] is something that no divorce can take
[03:54:52] from you. No government can confiscate.
[03:54:54] And it's something that's with you till
[03:54:55] the day you die. And so that's how you
[03:54:56] get better. You keep going. You keep
[03:54:59] improving the feedback loops. You invest
[03:55:01] appropriately. And you keep going allin
[03:55:03] on you. We've eliminated everything
[03:55:04] that's bad. We've started something
[03:55:06] that's good. We've gotten even better at
[03:55:08] being goodter. And now finally, we've
[03:55:10] got to stick to it when it gets tough
[03:55:12] because it will. Here's something that's
[03:55:14] taken me way too long to learn. Staying
[03:55:16] focused is like beating addiction. It's
[03:55:18] not a one-time victory. You have to
[03:55:20] fight it all day, every day, then wake
[03:55:23] up and do it again tomorrow. Because the
[03:55:25] thing that's going to distract you is
[03:55:26] going to change every day. The thing
[03:55:28] that's going to trigger your addiction
[03:55:29] to distraction is going to keep morphing
[03:55:33] and changing its form so that it can
[03:55:36] steal or rob you of your future. And so,
[03:55:38] you have to be adaptable in knowing that
[03:55:40] you have to fight it every day. And so
[03:55:42] it's not good enough to just say, "I was
[03:55:43] focused for this week." You've got to
[03:55:45] wake up on the eighth day and the ninth
[03:55:46] day and do it again. And so, you
[03:55:48] remember that guy who uh got rich drop
[03:55:51] shipping and day trading and uh buying
[03:55:53] crypto and wholesaling all at the same
[03:55:55] time? Yeah. Me neither. Focus. To win in
[03:55:59] business, you need to be able to say no
[03:56:02] without remorse and hear no without a
[03:56:05] loss of enthusiasm. which means that you
[03:56:08] have to keep feeling rejection, keep
[03:56:11] failing, and keep going while being
[03:56:15] willing to reject basically everyone
[03:56:18] else. And that seems so counter because
[03:56:19] you're right there and you're like, man,
[03:56:21] I don't want to reject this person
[03:56:22] because I know what it feels like to be
[03:56:23] rejected. You need to be able to
[03:56:25] maintain this discrepancy so that you
[03:56:27] can create the space to do the work that
[03:56:29] needs doing. So, there have been a
[03:56:30] couple of lessons that I have learned
[03:56:34] over and over again in my career. I've
[03:56:36] had to relearn. So, it's a lot like a
[03:56:38] like a fine wine. It's like it it gets
[03:56:40] better with age and there's more nuance
[03:56:42] to the flavor. So, I think focus is not
[03:56:45] a are you focused or not. It's how
[03:56:47] focused are you? And you can measure
[03:56:48] someone's focus by again the quality and
[03:56:50] quantity of things that they say no to.
[03:56:52] Which means that as you get better, more
[03:56:55] opportunities will emerge, which is
[03:56:57] interesting because people who start out
[03:56:59] can't see opportunity anywhere. And it's
[03:57:01] because they have so few skills and so
[03:57:02] there's very few opportunities for them.
[03:57:04] When you have a lot of skills, there are
[03:57:06] so many opportunities that are in front
[03:57:07] of you that you feel like you're missing
[03:57:10] out. But the real opportunity is
[03:57:13] actually in solving the problems in
[03:57:14] front of you. I was able to, in my
[03:57:17] opinion, become another order of
[03:57:20] magnitude greater in terms of
[03:57:21] entrepreneurship, which I would just
[03:57:22] measure by wealth. Once I was able to
[03:57:26] learn to say no and accept that I would
[03:57:30] not be able to pursue the many things
[03:57:32] that I know I could crush because once
[03:57:35] you realize how much actual work it
[03:57:37] takes to make something good, you
[03:57:39] realize how few things you're actually
[03:57:41] going to be able to do in your entire
[03:57:42] life. And so this is why picking becomes
[03:57:45] so important. Right now, the things that
[03:57:48] you're going to have to say no to are
[03:57:49] really the distractions and kind of in
[03:57:52] some ways easy. Say no to fantasy
[03:57:53] football, saying no to drinking beers
[03:57:55] with the boys, going out with the club,
[03:57:56] whatever. But in a year from now, once
[03:57:58] you have more skills, there will be more
[03:58:00] opportunities. You're going to have
[03:58:01] multiple $10,000 a month income
[03:58:03] opportunities that you're going to have
[03:58:04] to say no to to stick with the one that
[03:58:06] you have. And then once that thing
[03:58:07] becomes a $100,000 a month thing that
[03:58:08] you're doing, you're going to have to
[03:58:09] start saying no to multiple $100,000 a
[03:58:11] month opportunities. And here's the
[03:58:13] thing with opportunities that come up.
[03:58:15] They only show you the upside and not
[03:58:17] the downside. You have to know where the
[03:58:19] skeletons are buried. You have to know
[03:58:21] where the bodies are. If you don't know,
[03:58:23] and I've gone through this this this
[03:58:25] visual because I think about it every
[03:58:27] single time I have to walk through not
[03:58:30] doing something. You are here. You see
[03:58:33] this new opportunity here. Then you
[03:58:35] understand the downsides here. Then you
[03:58:38] live the downsides. Then you experience
[03:58:40] the upside. Then you achieve your goal.
[03:58:42] And so this is the starting point. This
[03:58:45] is called uninformed optimism. This is
[03:58:48] now informed pessimism. This is the
[03:58:50] value of despair. And this is where most
[03:58:53] people quit. But what they do is they
[03:58:55] don't even quit because they don't want
[03:58:56] to say they quit. What they do is they
[03:58:58] start another one of these things and
[03:59:00] they say, "Oh, this is now my uninformed
[03:59:02] optimism." And then, "Oh, now I
[03:59:04] understand this more." But the thing is
[03:59:06] is that they never actually get through
[03:59:07] to this upside. And so they just keep
[03:59:09] jumping from thing to thing to thing
[03:59:12] over and over again. And so the reason
[03:59:14] it takes so long is because you're in a
[03:59:16] rush. Big things don't happen on small
[03:59:18] timelines because you have to start from
[03:59:21] zero over and over again. And if you
[03:59:23] actually stick with it, it's actually
[03:59:24] the shortest way to get to where you
[03:59:26] want to go. It just takes longer than
[03:59:27] you think. Must be easy for you to say
[03:59:30] is probably something that you might
[03:59:31] think by watching this or listening to
[03:59:33] this. And I like to tell this story
[03:59:36] because in July of 2017 is when I
[03:59:40] started my podcast. And it was 90 days
[03:59:42] after I lost everything the last time.
[03:59:45] And from that point until now, it's
[03:59:49] taken that period of time to get to over
[03:59:51] a million downloads a month. And for the
[03:59:53] first three years, and I was making
[03:59:55] multiple podcasts, so we're talking
[03:59:56] three 400 episodes. For the first few
[03:59:59] years, I never really cracked 3,000
[04:00:01] downloads a month. And so I could say,
[04:00:04] man, why is this taking so long? But the
[04:00:06] real real is that it took me that long
[04:00:08] to get good. It also being extra real
[04:00:12] took me that long to have proof on the
[04:00:14] outside that what I was saying was true
[04:00:16] on the inside. And right now, no one who
[04:00:18] listens to my podcast cares that it took
[04:00:20] me seven years to get here. They just
[04:00:22] cared that it's good today. And so
[04:00:24] people quit here when things get hard
[04:00:26] because the thought of something being
[04:00:28] hard forever is unbearable. They think
[04:00:30] that this line is just going to keep
[04:00:32] going this way forever. But it's not
[04:00:35] because once you fully understand all
[04:00:37] the bodies where the skeletons are
[04:00:39] hidden, then you can actually start
[04:00:41] solving them one by one. The thing is is
[04:00:44] that that distraction only is
[04:00:46] distracting because you don't know what
[04:00:48] sucks about it. You might think you know
[04:00:50] what sucks about it, but you don't know
[04:00:51] what sucks about it. And so the big
[04:00:53] difference is you have something called
[04:00:56] declarative versus procedural knowledge.
[04:00:58] And so there's two types of learning and
[04:01:00] this is actually formal. This is uh this
[04:01:02] is from academia. So you have
[04:01:03] declarative knowledge which is knowing
[04:01:05] about something.
[04:01:07] So if you go memorize a fact or you you
[04:01:09] you learn how private equity works,
[04:01:11] right? This is knowing about. The other
[04:01:14] type of knowledge is procedural
[04:01:18] which is knowing how to.
[04:01:21] And so a lot of people mistake
[04:01:23] declarative knowledge for procedural.
[04:01:26] And so they mistakenly think that if
[04:01:28] they watch 10 videos on doing a private
[04:01:30] equity deal that it means they
[04:01:32] understand how to do a private equity
[04:01:33] deal. Or they watch 10 videos on cold
[04:01:35] outbound and they think it means they
[04:01:37] understand how to do cold outbound or 10
[04:01:39] videos on sales and so forth. But you're
[04:01:42] never really going to learn how to do it
[04:01:44] until you do it. And so you're going to
[04:01:46] learn more from your first hundred cold
[04:01:48] calls or 100 cold knock on doors than
[04:01:51] you will from a hundred books or videos
[04:01:53] that you watch. But I have good news.
[04:01:56] Nothing hard lasts forever. There's only
[04:01:59] three things that can happen. You either
[04:02:01] quit, it gets easier, or you get better.
[04:02:05] So no matter what, it always ends. You
[04:02:08] only lose when you quit before you see
[04:02:10] it all the way through. And I think
[04:02:11] that's incredibly encouraging. So no
[04:02:13] matter how hard whatever it is that
[04:02:15] you're doing is, which by the way just
[04:02:17] means that your expectation doesn't
[04:02:18] match reality. But no matter how hard it
[04:02:21] is, you either quit, it gets easier
[04:02:23] because something changes externally or
[04:02:26] you get harder. Something changes
[04:02:28] internally. But no matter what, it will
[04:02:30] end. Think about it like you're you're
[04:02:32] mining for gold, right? You're you're
[04:02:34] chiseling away underground and you've
[04:02:35] got this pile of gold. You don't know
[04:02:37] how far away it is, but it's underground
[04:02:38] and you're digging towards it. This
[04:02:40] difficulty of swinging the the the
[04:02:41] pickaxe can end when one, you walk out
[04:02:43] of the mine and say there's, you know
[04:02:45] what, marketing doesn't work. Sure. The
[04:02:48] second is that all of a sudden you hit a
[04:02:50] soft patch and then you're like, "Oh my
[04:02:52] god, I'm digging so much faster now.
[04:02:53] This is great." And then you get to the
[04:02:55] gold. Or you just start swinging the axe
[04:02:59] harder because you get more muscled, you
[04:03:01] get more efficient with your movements,
[04:03:02] and you just keep chiseling away. Even
[04:03:04] if it goes from dirt to rock, you just
[04:03:06] keep chiseling away at a slower pace,
[04:03:08] but you eventually break through and get
[04:03:10] there. But in all three of those
[04:03:12] scenarios, hard doesn't last forever.
[04:03:15] And so I'll give you a little rule of
[04:03:16] thumb that I've seen on how do how do I
[04:03:18] do more of what's working, right? How do
[04:03:19] I keep going? When it's easy, do more.
[04:03:22] When it's hard, do different. And so I
[04:03:25] told this story years ago, and I'll tell
[04:03:26] you guys again. So when Gym Launch just
[04:03:29] barely started to work, all right, so
[04:03:30] I'm like 3 months into Gym Launch
[04:03:32] working. Guess what? Guess what
[04:03:33] brilliant Alex thought he should do? So
[04:03:36] I went to this meet up of 10
[04:03:37] entrepreneurs. All the entrepreneurs
[04:03:38] were eight figureure entrepreneurs, so
[04:03:39] 10 million plus per year. I was not
[04:03:41] making that. I we were pacing probably
[04:03:42] three or $400,000 a month at the time.
[04:03:44] It was just me, Ila, and I think we had
[04:03:46] an assistant over kitchen sink, right?
[04:03:48] So, it was I was making the most money
[04:03:50] I'd ever made in my life and probably to
[04:03:52] this day because it was the most
[04:03:53] material change in my life by
[04:03:55] percentage. When you go from no money to
[04:03:58] hundreds of thousands a month within 90
[04:03:59] days, me looking at bankruptcy attorneys
[04:04:01] 6 months earlier to that, it's I can't I
[04:04:04] can't explain how crazy reality shifted.
[04:04:07] But I had this guy who came up to me
[04:04:10] after I gave my little presentation of
[04:04:12] like, hey, this is what's working. And
[04:04:13] so, of course, what I want to do now is
[04:04:14] start a supplement company. He came up
[04:04:16] to me and he said, "If what you're
[04:04:18] saying is true, if the economics of the
[04:04:20] business that you've outlined really do
[04:04:22] work as well as you say they do, when it
[04:04:25] gets easy is when you go hard. It's when
[04:04:27] you double down on what's working." And
[04:04:30] he said that to me, and I remember he
[04:04:31] said, "Because what's going to happen is
[04:04:32] that if it really works this well,
[04:04:34] someone bigger and better is going to
[04:04:36] take all your stuff and immediately try
[04:04:38] and do it with their distribution, their
[04:04:40] audience, and their leverage." And so if
[04:04:43] there's ever been a time to focus on the
[04:04:45] thing that's in front of you, it's right
[04:04:47] now. And I remember Leila and I felt
[04:04:49] this huge weight of pressure that
[04:04:52] started us at that point cuz literally I
[04:04:54] think I was I was really content for
[04:04:55] like 6 weeks and I was really thrilled.
[04:04:58] We had just gotten married. We're 6
[04:04:59] weeks into being, you know, married.
[04:05:01] We're making really good money. Uh she's
[04:05:03] 23 or 24. I'm 26 or 27. So like we're
[04:05:06] young. I was like, "Holy cow, this is
[04:05:08] amazing." Our rent, for context, was
[04:05:09] $1,200 a month. I was taking home 400,
[04:05:11] right? Like, and so I've always lived
[04:05:13] far below my means. At this point,
[04:05:15] though, we went back home with the devil
[04:05:18] inside of us in terms of the fear of us
[04:05:22] losing everything that we had. And so,
[04:05:24] we basically worked around the clock
[04:05:26] like someone was trying to put us out of
[04:05:27] business. And the thing is is that
[04:05:29] people did eventually, but by the time
[04:05:31] they did, we had gone so far ahead that
[04:05:34] they were way behind us because we were
[04:05:36] working against a hypothetical enemy who
[04:05:38] was trying to destroy us, not the ones
[04:05:40] that were actually mediocre and
[04:05:41] distracted. When it's easy, do more.
[04:05:44] Once it starts working, put the blinders
[04:05:47] on and hit the gas. And I would
[04:05:49] challenge you with this tactical setup
[04:05:52] right now. If you've never worked for 30
[04:05:54] days straight, I would encourage you to
[04:05:56] try it. In China, there's something
[04:05:58] called the 996, which is basically the
[04:06:01] standard for Chinese tech work hours,
[04:06:04] which is you work 9:00 a.m. to 9:00 p.m.
[04:06:06] 6 days a week. That's the bar. And so, I
[04:06:09] like to state that because we think we
[04:06:11] work so hard. That's just the average.
[04:06:14] And so, I would encourage you, remember
[04:06:16] hard times, hard men, right? Good times.
[04:06:19] Well, we need to act as though it's hard
[04:06:21] times because if you don't, you're
[04:06:23] surely going to become soft. My
[04:06:25] challenge for you is work 30 days
[04:06:27] straight. Work 10, work 12 hours a day,
[04:06:31] 30 days straight. What you will realize
[04:06:33] at the end of this is one, how much work
[04:06:36] you can actually do. Two, that you're
[04:06:38] not going to die. You're not made of
[04:06:40] glass. And third, you'll know that you
[04:06:42] have that gear if the time calls for it.
[04:06:45] Now, I will be very real with you. I
[04:06:48] work more now than I have ever worked in
[04:06:50] my life. Save maybe when I opened my
[04:06:53] very first gym. So, I work in absolute
[04:06:56] hours more than I ever have. And I
[04:06:58] produced significantly more than I did
[04:07:00] then. And this year, I think I've taken
[04:07:03] something like 10 or 11 days off in
[04:07:05] 2024. I would measure a day off as any
[04:07:09] day where I worked probably fewer than
[04:07:12] four hours. I put this as context. And I
[04:07:15] had a I had a security guard who was
[04:07:16] here atacquisition.com
[04:07:19] earlier this year and he was talking to
[04:07:21] uh some of the younger guys on the team
[04:07:23] and he said you should never let Alex
[04:07:26] work more hours than you because he's
[04:07:28] already ahead of you. And so if you want
[04:07:31] to catch up with him certainly don't let
[04:07:34] him outwork you. Some of the hoodoo
[04:07:38] mental health whatever people are going
[04:07:41] to disagree with me. also don't give a
[04:07:44] [ __ ] And so the thing is is you can
[04:07:47] just go and make those mental health
[04:07:49] people happy or you can get what the
[04:07:52] [ __ ] you came here to get. You can do
[04:07:55] what you came to do. And I have found
[04:07:57] that in my life I've gotten
[04:07:59] significantly more purpose and more
[04:08:00] drive from a long day's hard work from
[04:08:04] earning my shower at the end of the day
[04:08:07] than anything that I've ever had from a
[04:08:10] pleasure- seeeking perspective. As much
[04:08:12] as it's great to go to the pool for a
[04:08:14] day and hang out with some people or
[04:08:16] maybe just watch movies, as great as
[04:08:19] that may be, there's nothing that I get
[04:08:21] more filming out of than knowing that at
[04:08:25] the end of a day that I work 16 straight
[04:08:27] hours that I have some product that I
[04:08:29] pulled out of my brain and into the
[04:08:31] world that this thing got life. Now,
[04:08:34] looking back on the best days of my
[04:08:36] life, it was those types of days. And so
[04:08:39] when I realized that, I stopped trying
[04:08:41] to satisfy what everyone else told me my
[04:08:43] life was supposed to be like. They're
[04:08:44] like, "You should take vacations." I
[04:08:46] took my first vacation this year, and it
[04:08:49] was supposed to be a two-day vacation,
[04:08:51] and Leila and I left after one. Because
[04:08:53] what happened was I got there at this
[04:08:56] beautiful resort,5 or $10,000 a night,
[04:08:58] very expensive. And I I say that just to
[04:08:59] say that it was ritzy, right? It was
[04:09:01] luxurious. I get there, I sit out on the
[04:09:04] back of this beautiful patio for this
[04:09:05] really expensive room and I look out on
[04:09:08] this, you know, mountain view and I
[04:09:10] think to myself, this is beautiful and I
[04:09:14] don't care. I wish I felt something. And
[04:09:17] all I wanted was to get back in the
[04:09:19] game. And so I realized that even that
[04:09:22] little mini vacation was something that
[04:09:24] I had done because I thought it was an
[04:09:26] expectation. It was unspoken or spoken
[04:09:28] from someone else in my life. And so I
[04:09:30] have this quote that I live by which is
[04:09:32] if you don't know why you believe what
[04:09:34] you believe it's not your belief it's
[04:09:36] someone else's at that time it's like I
[04:09:38] had this belief that I should take a
[04:09:41] vacation but why now if I can't explain
[04:09:44] it which I really can't then I shouldn't
[04:09:46] do it and now I want to be very clear
[04:09:49] this doesn't mean that there's no time
[04:09:50] for rest but I like to think about the
[04:09:52] hypothetical extremes I like to think
[04:09:54] about the 996 that is just the standard
[04:09:57] in China and I like to think about
[04:09:59] people in the middle ages in the dark
[04:10:01] ages. They worked above their shop and
[04:10:04] they didn't have like the 7-day or 5day
[04:10:06] work week is something that was invented
[04:10:08] in the last hundred years. This is not
[04:10:10] pointing to your human capacity. This is
[04:10:12] pointing to a societal constraint. I
[04:10:15] think that a truly liberated individual
[04:10:17] operates purely from first principles of
[04:10:20] what do I want? What does it take to get
[04:10:22] it? And then what are the things that
[04:10:24] hold me back? And those those things
[04:10:26] that hold you back are going to be
[04:10:27] physical constraints. You can't operate
[04:10:29] without sleep. Not for an extended
[04:10:30] period of time. So, I'm not saying don't
[04:10:32] sleep. Sleep as much as you can. I'm not
[04:10:34] saying that you can work physical labor
[04:10:37] all hours of the day without rest. You
[04:10:39] need rest. And sometimes you need mental
[04:10:40] rest, which is different than physical
[04:10:42] rest. And that's okay. So, if you need,
[04:10:44] and I'm going to put need in quotes
[04:10:45] here, if your way of unplugging is
[04:10:48] watching Netflix, cool. If your way of
[04:10:50] unplugging is gardening, cool. If your
[04:10:51] way of unplugging is working out, cool.
[04:10:54] Do what works for you. But
[04:10:55] fundamentally, the goal is to increase
[04:10:57] total net output over the longest period
[04:10:59] of time. And so, it's not about, okay,
[04:11:02] I'm going to work 24 hours straight.
[04:11:04] Well, you're actually going to take from
[04:11:05] tomorrow. So, your net output over two
[04:11:06] days is going to be much worse. And so,
[04:11:09] it's really balancing that. And I
[04:11:11] learned that much later in life. I was
[04:11:13] able to get significantly more out of
[04:11:15] myself working seven days a week and
[04:11:17] working 10 hours, 12 hours on those days
[04:11:20] rather than working, call it, 18 every
[04:11:23] day. That was for me a little bit too
[04:11:26] much. Now I have had seasons where I
[04:11:28] call it three shifts. So basically I
[04:11:30] work 6:00 to noon, noon to 6:00, and
[04:11:32] then I work 6 to basically sleep time
[04:11:35] when I get back home. I only usually
[04:11:37] have to go into that gear probably once
[04:11:41] a year for maybe 6 weeks to 8 weeks is
[04:11:43] when I have to go into the third shift.
[04:11:45] But most of the times I can pretty much
[04:11:47] sustain 12 hours of work a day kind of
[04:11:49] indefinitely. I bring this up to kind of
[04:11:52] set the bar for at least where I'm at.
[04:11:54] So maybe you have some sort of
[04:11:55] benchmark. But if you're wanting to get
[04:11:58] ahead, I can promise you working less is
[04:12:00] probably not the way to do it.
[04:12:02] Especially when you don't have as many
[04:12:03] skills because the fewer skills that you
[04:12:05] have, the more labor or volume you have
[04:12:08] to compensate with in order to make up
[04:12:10] for the ineffectiveness per unit of time
[04:12:12] you work. And so in the beginning is
[04:12:15] when you actually have to work the most,
[04:12:16] but in the end is when you want to work
[04:12:18] the most because of how much more you're
[04:12:20] getting for it. So my team wanted me to
[04:12:22] make this point because they've
[04:12:23] obviously seen me work and they're like,
[04:12:24] I don't think this is coming through in
[04:12:26] this video, which is that I have an
[04:12:27] obsession with speed. This seems kind of
[04:12:30] weird in just position with patience,
[04:12:31] but this is the very classic micro
[04:12:33] speed, macro patience, you know,
[04:12:35] whatever whatever whatever is you
[04:12:36] prefer. The idea is though that you want
[04:12:39] to pull reality forward. And so I always
[04:12:41] like to break things down, whether it's
[04:12:43] me or my team, into how many hours and
[04:12:45] minutes something's going to take. And
[04:12:46] then I like to stack those things back
[04:12:48] and forth. And rather than using
[04:12:50] arbitrary deadlines of, okay, let's get
[04:12:52] this done by next week, you use actual
[04:12:54] deadlines based on how long it should
[04:12:55] take. And then when you find out how
[04:12:57] long something takes, you then ask the
[04:12:59] next question, which is how can I make
[04:13:00] this take less time? How can I automate
[04:13:02] this thing? How can I automate portions
[04:13:03] of this work? How can I how can I give
[04:13:05] away chunks of this? How can I deem some
[04:13:07] of this unnecessary? And so that
[04:13:10] continuous cutting and pulling forward
[04:13:12] of tasks is how you can move so much
[04:13:15] faster through life and towards your
[04:13:17] goals. And so I have this weird mental
[04:13:19] belief that there's like this this big
[04:13:22] path in front of me that I have all
[04:13:24] these skills that I have to achieve to
[04:13:26] hit these milestones that is laid out on
[04:13:28] this time span. And so I reject the
[04:13:30] timeline, but I accept the skills. And
[04:13:33] so the idea is like, okay, it's like I'm
[04:13:35] a Pac-Man of like eating those little
[04:13:36] dots and each of those dots is a skill.
[04:13:38] It's like I want to pull it towards me
[04:13:39] as fast as I can so I can so I can
[04:13:41] ingest the skills and basically power up
[04:13:44] myself faster because I know that these
[04:13:46] skills are requisites. I can't move on
[04:13:48] to calculus without knowing arithmetic.
[04:13:50] I can't move on to calculus without
[04:13:51] knowing algebra. There's no way around
[04:13:52] it. But I can choose to learn algebra
[04:13:55] faster. And so then it's like, okay,
[04:13:58] what is required to learn algebra? Oh,
[04:14:00] and if I do more problems faster than
[04:14:02] the standard person, then I'll get there
[04:14:04] faster. And so if the class says, "Okay,
[04:14:06] I need you to do these 10 problem sets
[04:14:08] and they're due next week." Well, then
[04:14:10] how long does it take for me to do those
[04:14:12] problems, maybe 30 minutes, then why
[04:14:14] can't I do my second lesson 30 minutes
[04:14:16] later and then do another 10 problems
[04:14:17] and do my third lesson 30 minutes after
[04:14:20] that and do another 10 problems? Well,
[04:14:21] if that's the case, then I can do an
[04:14:23] entire year's worth of work in a week.
[04:14:26] And this is how in my opinion pulling
[04:14:29] forward is one of those things that I've
[04:14:31] seen so many of the most successful
[04:14:33] entrepreneurs do is they simply question
[04:14:36] timelines
[04:14:37] aggressively and ruthlessly eliminate
[04:14:40] any waste or gap between the actions
[04:14:43] required to win and everything else.
[04:14:45] Honestly, I think the things that I'm
[04:14:47] working on right now for my skills are
[04:14:50] I'm learning how to
[04:14:53] reinforce
[04:14:55] cultural norms. across a company that
[04:14:57] continues to scale which I define as the
[04:15:01] rules that govern reinforcement in an
[04:15:03] organization. That is the culture and
[04:15:06] those are both spoken and unspoken
[04:15:08] rules. And when I say rules, I mean when
[04:15:10] someone does this, they get a pat on the
[04:15:12] butt. When someone does this, they get
[04:15:15] uh chastised or they get a ding, right?
[04:15:17] And the thing is is that people like to
[04:15:19] say they have a good culture here, but
[04:15:22] the culture is is is hundred a thousand
[04:15:25] unspoken rules and that's why it takes
[04:15:27] people time to learn and figure out what
[04:15:29] the culture is when they go somewhere
[04:15:31] new. You can give someone a list of
[04:15:33] aundred rules and if you were very
[04:15:35] granular, you could figure it out. The
[04:15:37] problem is that the culture changes
[04:15:38] based on the people who change the
[04:15:39] reinforcers. And so that means that the
[04:15:42] culture in a team could be different
[04:15:44] than the culture in the company because
[04:15:45] the person who's closest to them uh
[04:15:47] manages it differently. And so that
[04:15:49] changes the behavior. And so that's why
[04:15:51] a sales team can have a different
[04:15:52] culture than a marketing team, a
[04:15:53] different culture than a finance team,
[04:15:54] different culture than an HR team. And
[04:15:56] so I'd say right now a big focus of me
[04:15:58] of mine is trying to standardize the
[04:16:01] rules that govern reinforcement across
[04:16:03] an organization that scales and making
[04:16:04] sure that everyone is aligned with that
[04:16:07] style of work. The second thing that I'm
[04:16:10] working on right now is basically the
[04:16:12] highest level of recruiting. And
[04:16:14] recruiting and talent is actually kind
[04:16:17] of like focus where it's one of those
[04:16:19] skills that I don't think you ever
[04:16:21] master. You just keep learning how many
[04:16:23] more levels there are to it. It's like
[04:16:24] right when you finish it, you realize
[04:16:25] that you're at a sub peak and there's
[04:16:27] actually another peak beyond it. The
[04:16:28] missed lifts and then you see the next
[04:16:29] steps. And so like focus, I thought,
[04:16:32] "Oh, I was focused at $100,000 a month
[04:16:34] because I could turn these opportunities
[04:16:35] down." And then you got some even sexier
[04:16:37] opportunities. You got to learn how to
[04:16:38] say no to those. So the same thing
[04:16:39] happens with talent is that you're
[04:16:41] willing to tolerate a certain amount of
[04:16:42] mediocrity at one level. That is no
[04:16:45] longer tolerable at a level above that.
[04:16:46] And the types of people that you bring
[04:16:48] in, you have a higher standard, a higher
[04:16:50] bar for those people and attracting them
[04:16:51] in the process associated with getting
[04:16:53] them to buy into your culture, your
[04:16:54] vision, and getting them to take their
[04:16:56] skills and apply them to your
[04:16:57] opportunity is a skill set that I am
[04:16:59] working on now because fundamentally I
[04:17:01] have a belief which is the best talent
[04:17:02] is always yet to come. And that's
[04:17:04] predicated on the idea that if I get
[04:17:05] better, my opportunity will get better
[04:17:07] and that will attract more people and
[04:17:09] better people. And I bring this up
[04:17:11] because I basically want to translate
[04:17:13] one thing, which is that the
[04:17:15] reinvestment in learning skills never
[04:17:18] ends. And so Charlie Mer said this, you
[04:17:21] just have to be a lifelong student. You
[04:17:23] have to be willing and want to learn. So
[04:17:25] I actually had um an example of this. So
[04:17:27] recently there was somebody on uh teams.
[04:17:28] I did a bunch of one-on- ones uh over
[04:17:30] the last week cuz I was looking at one
[04:17:31] of the departments and uh one of the one
[04:17:34] of the guys said, "Hey, I have this
[04:17:35] particular skill. I was hoping that we
[04:17:36] could eventually have a a role that only
[04:17:39] does this thing." And I said, "You know,
[04:17:41] it's interesting that you that you ask
[04:17:43] or you make that request because if I
[04:17:45] were you, I would not think that way at
[04:17:47] all. I would think how could I learn 10
[04:17:50] more skills." Rather than how can the
[04:17:52] organization meet my demands, it should
[04:17:54] be how can I let my skills meet the
[04:17:57] demands of the existing business. It's
[04:17:59] asking reality to meet you where you're
[04:18:00] at rather than meeting reality where it
[04:18:02] is. And I think that too many people do
[04:18:04] this. Why can't the world insert be more
[04:18:08] convenient for me? Well, the world is
[04:18:10] uncaring and doesn't care about you at
[04:18:11] all. And underlying underpinning that
[04:18:14] statement is the entitlement is the
[04:18:15] expectation that it somehow should. And
[04:18:17] I think that is a poverty lens. And so
[04:18:19] the wealthy accept the world for what it
[04:18:21] is and then choose to maximize and
[04:18:23] adapt. Everyone else tries to stomp
[04:18:26] their feet and throw tantrums and say
[04:18:27] how it's not fair. And they're right.
[04:18:29] And so what? There's a Haitian proverb
[04:18:32] that has nothing to do with cats and
[04:18:33] dogs that I think is relevant right now,
[04:18:36] which is behind mountains are more
[04:18:38] mountains. Goals aren't finish lines,
[04:18:42] they're mile markers. And I think that's
[04:18:44] a great mental frame, which is that you
[04:18:47] think that your goal is to get to
[04:18:49] $10,000 a month or $100,000 a month or
[04:18:51] million a month or 10 million a month,
[04:18:53] whatever your goal is. And I can promise
[04:18:55] you, having hit those, you just move it
[04:18:58] again. You just the mist lifts when you
[04:19:00] get there and you realize there's
[04:19:01] another mountain top. But where people
[04:19:03] lose their way is when they start
[04:19:04] listening to people at the bottom of the
[04:19:05] mountain who see them at the subhead and
[04:19:08] say, "You weren't happy last time when
[04:19:09] you got to the last peak. Why are you
[04:19:11] going to be happy the next time?" But
[04:19:12] that's under their assumption in their
[04:19:14] poverty lens that you did it to get to
[04:19:16] the mountaintop. You did it for the
[04:19:18] climb and they'll never understand that
[04:19:21] and don't expect them to. I remember I
[04:19:23] was trying to understand this person who
[04:19:26] had made this really irrational decision
[04:19:27] and I kept thinking like how how does
[04:19:29] this decision make sense and I was I was
[04:19:31] talking to my father actually and he
[04:19:33] said you're trying to apply logic to
[04:19:37] someone who's illogical and that itself
[04:19:40] is illogical and I remember thinking
[04:19:43] about that is that like there are these
[04:19:44] people in our lives that say these
[04:19:46] things that you're like I don't
[04:19:46] understand why they'd say that and then
[04:19:48] you try and make sense of it but the
[04:19:50] effort of trying to make sense of
[04:19:52] somebody who doesn't make sense is
[04:19:53] nonsensical. And so if it doesn't make
[04:19:56] sense to you, ignore it because they're
[04:19:58] going to disappear anyways. One of the
[04:20:00] things that has been true in my life is
[04:20:02] that the lazy don't know how to start,
[04:20:05] the losers don't know how to finish, and
[04:20:07] the legends don't know how to stop. And
[04:20:10] if I look at that, the lazy, the loser,
[04:20:11] the legends, I know which one I would
[04:20:13] rather be. And I also say that as
[04:20:15] somebody who doesn't believe in legacy
[04:20:18] or anything after we die. So, this is
[04:20:20] tactical. Find what works, do more of
[04:20:23] what works, find the thing that's
[04:20:25] preventing you from doing more of what
[04:20:27] works, solve that thing, and get back to
[04:20:29] doing more of what works. Then repeat.
[04:20:32] And so, the reality is that in health,
[04:20:34] marriage, business, or any game worth
[04:20:36] playing, you don't win by winning. You
[04:20:38] win by staying alive long enough that
[04:20:41] you outlast everyone else. So I will
[04:20:43] give you the advice that I gave a
[04:20:45] subgroup in school that we picked a
[04:20:47] 100red people who had applied out of 500
[04:20:49] plus to basically do a 90-day sprint to
[04:20:52] help them start a school community. So
[04:20:53] we wanted to do a more in-depth kind of
[04:20:55] training things like that for this
[04:20:56] special group so that we could see if
[04:20:58] this new implementation yielded better
[04:21:00] results. And so the guy who we had
[04:21:02] running the group asked me he's like can
[04:21:03] you give any kind of like words of
[04:21:04] wisdom to these guys before we kick it
[04:21:06] off? And so this is what I told them.
[04:21:08] Number one follow instructions. Number
[04:21:11] two, when you reach something that you
[04:21:12] don't understand how to do, Google
[04:21:15] first. Number three, when you figure it
[04:21:17] out, post it. Others also may have
[04:21:20] struggled. Four, actually follow the
[04:21:23] rule of 100 daily, which is that you
[04:21:25] reach out to a 100 people, you make a
[04:21:27] post that you spent 100 minutes on,
[04:21:29] spend $100 plus on ads, and you spend at
[04:21:32] least 100 minutes a day making and
[04:21:34] improving ads and researching ads. As
[04:21:36] long as you do those things consistently
[04:21:38] and you get better, you will see
[04:21:41] results. And the amount of you that I
[04:21:42] see who tag me in like day four, day 20,
[04:21:45] day 30, the guys who are at day 60 of
[04:21:47] rule of 100 are like, I have more
[04:21:49] business than I can possibly handle. The
[04:21:50] problem is no one sticks with anything.
[04:21:52] And this is why I want you to stick with
[04:21:54] it. Rule number five, you will be
[04:21:55] excited for a week, then excitement will
[04:21:58] end, and that is where the work begins.
[04:22:01] Six, your work works on you more than
[04:22:03] you work on it. You are the product
[04:22:06] that's getting built more than anything
[04:22:08] that you're actually putting into your
[04:22:09] business. Remember that. Seven,
[04:22:12] everything is unscalable in the
[04:22:14] beginning. That's the point. It's how
[04:22:16] you learn every piece of it. And once
[04:22:18] you learn every piece of it, people will
[04:22:20] call you an expert. Eight, the pain of
[04:22:22] repetition is what forces you to seek
[04:22:24] improvement. When you figure out ways to
[04:22:27] get more for what you do, you've gained
[04:22:29] skill. People want to avoid the pain.
[04:22:32] One of my favorite bodybuilding coaches,
[04:22:34] Milo Sachev, talks about this in the
[04:22:37] context of how to grow a muscle. He
[04:22:39] says, "Find the pain." And then he'll
[04:22:42] just shout, he'll be like, "Suffer.
[04:22:43] Suffer." He's like, "Stay there. Find
[04:22:45] the pain." Because the thing is is that
[04:22:47] that pain is what forces you to change.
[04:22:50] And so if you encounter the pain and
[04:22:53] then say, "Oh, it's not working." That's
[04:22:55] the pain that you need to lean into.
[04:22:57] Because when it's not working is what
[04:22:58] will force you to do an improvement. And
[04:23:01] that's how you get good at making better
[04:23:04] content, get good at making better ads,
[04:23:06] get good at having more effective
[04:23:08] reachouts on different channels,
[04:23:09] whatever. It's that pain that forces you
[04:23:11] to improve. Nine, if you complain, you
[04:23:14] are dead to me. And I said this because
[04:23:18] I believe it. Like there is nothing
[04:23:21] weaker and more helpless and that has
[04:23:24] lower agency than someone who simply
[04:23:26] complains about what has occurred. It's
[04:23:29] something that happened in the past or
[04:23:31] is in front of them in the present. And
[04:23:33] regardless, complaining literally does
[04:23:36] nothing. It's a net zero. It's a net
[04:23:38] loss. You both lose the energy that you
[04:23:42] could have spent improving. And you also
[04:23:44] lose respect from every single person
[04:23:46] that you complain to. And they will
[04:23:48] associate the complaints with you. They
[04:23:51] won't remember what you complain about,
[04:23:53] only that you complain. 10. Literally
[04:23:57] thousands of people have already
[04:23:58] succeeded. You are not special. Repeat
[04:24:02] the same activities and you will be able
[04:24:03] to repeat the same outcomes. Before you
[04:24:06] make a conclusion that something doesn't
[04:24:07] work, I want you to state the objective
[04:24:09] truth of what you're claiming. You're
[04:24:11] like, "Facebook ads don't work." Sure.
[04:24:14] So the 400 billion a year in advertising
[04:24:17] that gets spent on Facebook just somehow
[04:24:19] doesn't work. People aren't doing it
[04:24:20] because it's not working. Cold outbound
[04:24:22] doesn't work. Yeah. So, the gazillion
[04:24:24] companies that do 10,000 emails, 10,000
[04:24:26] calls a day, they just it just it
[04:24:29] doesn't work. What you have to reframe
[04:24:31] it as is, I don't know how to make it
[04:24:34] work. I am not good enough to know how
[04:24:37] to make it work because you're not
[04:24:39] making as much money as you want because
[04:24:40] you're not as good as you think you are.
[04:24:42] 11. Write down every reason that you're
[04:24:44] going to stick with it. Put it in front
[04:24:46] of you and revisit it when you need a
[04:24:49] reminder of why to stick with it. 12.
[04:24:51] Business is shockingly simple but
[04:24:53] surprisingly hard. The hard comes in the
[04:24:56] form of consistency. The moment you
[04:24:58] don't want to do it or just skip today
[04:25:01] is the day you realize what hard
[04:25:03] actually feels like. Learn to endure,
[04:25:06] overcome.
[04:25:07] 13. Just win. Because at the end of the
[04:25:11] day, all of this hardship will be
[04:25:13] forgotten. It will fade into your
[04:25:15] memory. And so know that as you're going
[04:25:17] through it, you're actually just going
[04:25:18] to disproportionately in your memory
[04:25:20] remember the good stuff and not the bad
[04:25:21] stuff. I only have a few glimpses in my
[04:25:25] memory of the time when I was sleeping
[04:25:26] on the floor and I and I, you know, had
[04:25:28] my gym and I was getting started and I
[04:25:29] remember being so tired that like a good
[04:25:30] night's sleep couldn't fix it. I
[04:25:32] remember that. But it's almost like I
[04:25:34] remember the words that I told myself
[04:25:36] more than I even remember the
[04:25:37] experiences because it was so long ago.
[04:25:39] things will get better and you will
[04:25:40] remember the betterness more than you
[04:25:42] remember the suffering because the
[04:25:43] betterness will carry over in today
[04:25:45] which will always be fresher for you
[04:25:46] than how long ago the suffering may have
[04:25:48] been. The best time to work on improving
[04:25:50] your business was last year. The second
[04:25:51] best time is today so you might as well
[04:25:53] get started. So if you're a business
[04:25:54] owner and you'd like to scale, I'd like
[04:25:56] to invite you out to my headquarters for
[04:25:57] one of our scaling workshops where we
[04:25:59] help identify and solve your number one
[04:26:01] constraint so you can start the year
[04:26:03] with lots of momentum. So, it's two days
[04:26:06] again at my headquarters with my team
[04:26:08] talking about your business. And so, if
[04:26:10] that sounds at all interesting, click
[04:26:11] the link below, book a call with my
[04:26:13] team, and if you're a fit, we'd love to
[04:26:14] see you out of here. Most of my success
[04:26:15] in business has come from finding and
[04:26:17] exploiting unfair advantages. Here are
[04:26:20] 15 lessons on finding and leveraging
[04:26:22] yours. So, let's start with number one.
[04:26:24] Pain is the price of progress.
[04:26:27] The fastest growth periods are often the
[04:26:29] most miserable. If you want to progress,
[04:26:32] get used to pain. If you think about
[04:26:34] what actually occurs when you grow, you
[04:26:36] stretch past your point of comfort. So
[04:26:38] even if you're growing a muscle, like
[04:26:40] you stretch it, you break it down, it's
[04:26:41] painful. If you have growing pains, like
[04:26:44] as a kid, it's like you grew too fast
[04:26:45] and your joints are in a lot of pain. If
[04:26:47] you're a company and you expand, this is
[04:26:50] technically supposed to be good stuff,
[04:26:51] but it doesn't make it any less painful.
[04:26:53] Elite athletes don't get stronger during
[04:26:56] easy workouts. If we want progress, we
[04:26:59] must accept the price of pain that's
[04:27:02] attached to it. You cannot both want
[04:27:04] progress and live an easy life. These
[04:27:06] two things conflict. Number two, happy
[04:27:09] but not satisfied. So, let me explain
[04:27:12] this. So, you're allowed to be happy
[04:27:14] before you hit your goal, just not
[04:27:17] satisfied. And so, there's a very big
[04:27:19] difference between being content with
[04:27:20] your life, content with your work, and
[04:27:22] complacent, meaning you're not going to
[04:27:23] take any more action. There's this great
[04:27:25] Haitian proverb, which is behind
[04:27:27] mountains are more mountains. It's kind
[04:27:29] of like after every peak, you can just
[04:27:31] see more peaks ahead of you. The work
[04:27:33] works on you more than you work on it.
[04:27:35] For me, I remember I had a year that I
[04:27:37] basically went into retirement trying to
[04:27:38] figure out what I wanted to do. And the
[04:27:40] thesis that I came out with was that
[04:27:42] hard work is the goal. And so, the fact
[04:27:44] that there's something that happens as a
[04:27:46] result of hard work is really just a
[04:27:48] secondary effect. It's a consequence,
[04:27:50] but the goal is the work itself. I, you
[04:27:52] know, I had a friend this morning who
[04:27:54] messaged me. They're like, "Why do you
[04:27:55] still work?" And I was like, "Because
[04:27:56] it's the thing that I enjoy doing most."
[04:27:58] And when I looked back on my life, when
[04:27:59] I didn't work, I was bored and felt
[04:28:02] depressed. And when I do work, I am
[04:28:05] stressed, but I do have moments that I
[04:28:07] really enjoy as well. I took this as a
[04:28:09] kind of a foundational truth for me, not
[04:28:11] for everyone, that there is misery on
[04:28:12] both sides. So, I might as well be
[04:28:14] productive and useful. And the only way
[04:28:15] to be productive and useful is to be
[04:28:17] happy about the process, but not
[04:28:19] satisfied so you can continue to provide
[04:28:22] value to the world. Now, number three,
[04:28:25] ignore critics. Now, this is probably
[04:28:27] easy to say, hard to do. So, let me let
[04:28:31] me break this down a little bit more.
[04:28:32] So, friendly reminder that most people
[04:28:35] are fat, poor pansies. Don't listen to
[04:28:37] them when they try to deter you from
[04:28:39] doing whatever it takes to succeed. So,
[04:28:41] the average person will always try to
[04:28:43] keep you average. It makes sense that if
[04:28:45] you want to be extraordinary, you will
[04:28:47] do things that an ordinary person would
[04:28:49] see as extra, right? [laughter] And so a
[04:28:52] lot of people, and this is this is the
[04:28:54] really hard part that I had to come to
[04:28:55] terms with, is that a lot of people want
[04:28:57] to see you fail because it justifies the
[04:28:58] risk that they chose not to take. We
[04:29:00] always have to think about listening to
[04:29:01] the people who are closest to our goals,
[04:29:02] not closest to us. And if you want a
[04:29:05] more violent version of this, your
[04:29:07] critics are going to eventually die and
[04:29:10] their opinion isn't going to matter
[04:29:12] then, which means it probably also
[04:29:14] doesn't matter now. So, might as well do
[04:29:17] what you wanted to do originally. Number
[04:29:18] four, selective productivity.
[04:29:24] Productivity comes from all the things
[04:29:26] that you choose not to do. I'm going to
[04:29:28] define two more terms for you because I
[04:29:29] think it's important. I see commitment
[04:29:31] as the elimination of alternatives. So,
[04:29:33] if I get married, then I eliminate all
[04:29:35] alternatives to the person that I'm
[04:29:37] married to. Right? That is commitment,
[04:29:39] right? Which is very similar to focus.
[04:29:41] Focus, if you think of the hypothetical
[04:29:43] extreme of focus, is that somebody does
[04:29:45] literally nothing but one thing. So they
[04:29:46] don't eat, they don't sleep, they would
[04:29:48] eventually die, but they would be 100%
[04:29:50] focused during the time that they were
[04:29:51] alive, right? Obviously, we have to put
[04:29:52] a couple things in. You have to eat
[04:29:54] food, you have to sleep, right? But the
[04:29:56] most focused person does the fewest
[04:29:58] things outside of the thing they're
[04:29:59] focused on. Focus is about the number of
[04:30:02] things that you say no to. Having this
[04:30:05] framework is, in my opinion, more
[04:30:08] powerful for productivity than just
[04:30:09] about anything else. Right? People are
[04:30:10] always trying to figure out like
[04:30:12] productivity hacks, but they want to add
[04:30:14] things to their lives to become more
[04:30:15] productive, which is completely counter
[04:30:17] to what focus even means. It's getting
[04:30:19] rid of everything that's not the thing
[04:30:21] is how you focus. Now, part of that also
[04:30:23] means environmentally, right? So, if you
[04:30:25] like have a window that you look outside
[04:30:26] of and you've got people who walk past
[04:30:28] your office and people can knock on the
[04:30:29] door or you've got slack notifications,
[04:30:31] of course, you're not focused because
[04:30:32] all of those things are not the work.
[04:30:34] So, I'm going to give you an analogy
[04:30:35] here. So, imagine there's a wall that
[04:30:37] you have to get over. All right? In
[04:30:39] order to you have to get a critical mass
[04:30:40] to get above this wall, right? And so
[04:30:43] you start putting up, you know, these
[04:30:45] ladders
[04:30:46] against the wall to try and climb over
[04:30:48] the wall. All right, this should make
[04:30:50] some sense. But as you try to build up
[04:30:53] the the little rungs of the ladder, so
[04:30:55] you put four rungs up. Well, you're not
[04:30:57] going to get the critical mass required
[04:30:58] to get over the hump to actually get the
[04:31:00] success you want. But the idea, the
[04:31:02] fallacy is that, oh, I'll just do all
[04:31:05] three or four of these things and I'll
[04:31:07] see which one works. When the reality is
[04:31:09] that any of them work, but none of them
[04:31:10] will work unless you work on one. And
[04:31:13] so, we have to take these four rungs
[04:31:15] that we're able to build and say, you
[04:31:16] know what, we're not going to do that.
[04:31:17] We're going to put that rung here cuz
[04:31:19] I'm going to take that time that I'm
[04:31:20] putting for my second opportunity, put
[04:31:21] it here. I'm gonna take this rung and
[04:31:23] put it right here. And then I'm gonna
[04:31:25] take this rugg and what do you know? I
[04:31:27] can get over this hump on top and I can
[04:31:30] get to the other side of the wall, which
[04:31:31] of course is where all the money and all
[04:31:33] the happiness and all the, you know, the
[04:31:35] girls uh with, you know, beautiful,
[04:31:37] beautiful hair. Look at this beautiful
[04:31:38] hair, right? This beautiful hair. Now
[04:31:40] she looks like a bug. Anyways, uh hold
[04:31:42] on. There you go.
[04:31:46] What's crazy is that this literally
[04:31:47] happens at all levels of business. Like
[04:31:49] people who are starting out trying to
[04:31:50] start five things, people who are at
[04:31:51] like their second or fifth year. I
[04:31:53] talked to a guy last night who has a
[04:31:55] really good business, really good
[04:31:56] margin, 50% margins, has great revenue
[04:31:58] retention. He was in cyber uh security.
[04:32:00] People stay with him, people pay. He has
[04:32:01] no problem getting customers. He has no
[04:32:03] problem delivering on them. I was like,
[04:32:03] "What's the problem?" He's like, "Me?"
[04:32:05] He said, "I just I get bored." He's
[04:32:06] like, "I just want to start more
[04:32:07] things." And I'm like, "Yeah, you got to
[04:32:09] stop that." Like, it's like the thing is
[04:32:12] is think about how much more successful
[04:32:14] you'd be. So, zoom all the way out.
[04:32:16] Think of somebody who gets better every
[04:32:18] single year and works on the same
[04:32:21] project for 20 years. you'd be like, "My
[04:32:23] god, that guy's probably really [ __ ]
[04:32:25] good." And what's interesting about this
[04:32:26] is that it doesn't matter what project
[04:32:29] the person works on, you do 20 years of
[04:32:31] reps and you do nothing else, you're
[04:32:32] going to be good. And so, if you know
[04:32:35] that that's a that's a fact, that's a
[04:32:36] certainty that you're going to be good
[04:32:38] with 20 years of practice, then the
[04:32:40] objective is to just get 20 years of
[04:32:42] practice in one thing and stick with it.
[04:32:44] So, like, your plans aren't working
[04:32:46] because the plans are wrong. The plans
[04:32:48] aren't working because you're not
[04:32:49] working on the plan. The hard part about
[04:32:51] the plan is not creating the plan or
[04:32:54] even following the plan. It's sticking
[04:32:56] with the plan. That's the hard part. All
[04:32:58] right. Number five, fear
[04:33:02] versus regret. So change is scary, but
[04:33:04] so is regret. And so the life you live
[04:33:07] depends on the one you fear most. The
[04:33:09] more successful version of yourself also
[04:33:11] has fear. It's just that your fear of
[04:33:14] regret is greater than your fear of
[04:33:17] rejection. Think about that for a
[04:33:18] second. I'm going to say it one more
[04:33:19] time. Your fear of regret must
[04:33:22] supersede, must be bigger, must be
[04:33:24] greater than your fear of rejection. And
[04:33:27] so I remember when I when I when I quit
[04:33:28] my management consulting job, which took
[04:33:30] me six months, so I'm not saying this
[04:33:31] from a pedestal. It took me 6 months of
[04:33:33] I decided I wanted to quit. It took me 6
[04:33:35] months before I actually quit. By the
[04:33:37] way, you can measure how powerful
[04:33:38] someone is by the distance between when
[04:33:40] they make a decision and when it happens
[04:33:42] in reality. So if you want to feel
[04:33:44] impotent, then take as long as you
[04:33:46] possibly can between when you make a
[04:33:47] decision and when you act on that
[04:33:48] decision. Now, for me, it was 6 months.
[04:33:50] And all I did was I called my friends up
[04:33:52] every night. I was like, I'm going to
[04:33:53] quit my job. I'm going to start a
[04:33:54] business. And I, you know, we talk every
[04:33:55] night, literally every night. And I
[04:33:56] would be pacing in my condo like, I'm
[04:33:58] going to do it. I'm going to do it. And
[04:33:59] I wouldn't do it. I was too afraid. I
[04:34:01] was too much of a scaredy-cat. But the
[04:34:02] thing that got me over the hump was
[04:34:04] this. Number one, I knew that when I
[04:34:07] looked back on my life, if I never took
[04:34:10] the jump, I would have been ashamed of
[04:34:12] myself. And I would have felt like I was
[04:34:14] a pansy. And I was like, I can't die a
[04:34:15] pansy. I have to be able to make a jump.
[04:34:18] Number two, I played out plan B, which
[04:34:20] is, okay, let's say I actually
[04:34:22] completely fail. What happens? I was
[04:34:23] like, well, I'm not really going to be
[04:34:26] homeless. I know enough people that I
[04:34:27] can get food, right? I was like, okay,
[04:34:30] so I would probably just couch surf. I'd
[04:34:31] have a little bit of shame, but at the
[04:34:32] end of the day, what would I really do?
[04:34:34] Well, I could always apply to get the
[04:34:35] job that I had back or I could just go
[04:34:37] to another place with an experience or a
[04:34:40] story that would set me up for something
[04:34:42] cooler later. And so all of a sudden I
[04:34:44] was like, "Wait, so my plan B is that I
[04:34:45] just have a cool experience that I could
[04:34:47] talk about at a job interview or to go
[04:34:48] to business school." Okay, that's that
[04:34:50] doesn't actually sound that bad. And so
[04:34:52] there's this huge amorphous fear, but
[04:34:54] I've just noticed in my life that fear
[04:34:56] only exists in the vague. It doesn't
[04:34:58] exist in the specific. If you're afraid
[04:35:00] of something, try and break it into
[04:35:02] pieces and spell it out. Play out the
[04:35:03] next two or three steps because all of a
[04:35:05] sudden, if you're in the developed
[04:35:06] Western world, the downside risk is not
[04:35:10] really real. Like the only real downside
[04:35:13] risk is the opinions of other people who
[04:35:15] will say that you failed who you don't
[04:35:17] care about anyways. But like you think
[04:35:19] you're going to die, but you're not.
[04:35:21] You're just going to learn some stuff
[04:35:23] and you'll be like, "Oh, maybe next time
[04:35:24] I'm not going to make that mistake." And
[04:35:26] that's it. And I say this and it's easy
[04:35:27] for me to say, but it took me 6 months
[04:35:29] to figure this out. But I do remember my
[04:35:31] final straw was the realization that I
[04:35:33] had at the time no girlfriend, no kids,
[04:35:36] and I had no real, you know, financial
[04:35:38] responsibilities besides like eating and
[04:35:40] having a place to live. I said, if I
[04:35:43] can't make the decision now because it
[04:35:45] feels too risky, I will never be able to
[04:35:47] make the decision because if other
[04:35:49] people rely on me, now some of you are
[04:35:51] in a position where people do rely on
[04:35:52] you and you're like, "Well, Alex, you
[04:35:54] know, I've got people who rely on me."
[04:35:56] Yeah, I would say that it makes it
[04:35:58] harder and what now? Harder and so what?
[04:36:02] But for me, that was the thing that got
[04:36:03] me over the hump was like, if I don't do
[04:36:05] it now, I'm never going to do it. I'm
[04:36:07] never going to have fewer
[04:36:08] responsibilities.
[04:36:10] And to to play this out a little bit
[04:36:11] more, if you have people who depend on
[04:36:13] you, their dependencies on you might
[04:36:15] increase. And so, if you can't do it
[04:36:16] now, you still might as well do it,
[04:36:19] right? Because it's only going to go one
[04:36:20] way. Number six, persistence
[04:36:23] creates timing.
[04:36:27] So you can time everything perfectly if
[04:36:30] your intention is to never stop. I'm
[04:36:32] going to say this one more time. You can
[04:36:34] time everything perfectly if your
[04:36:36] intention is to never stop. So think
[04:36:38] about this visually. So let's imagine
[04:36:40] that this line right here is is the is
[04:36:42] your lifeline. It's life as time passes.
[04:36:45] Right? Now
[04:36:47] let's say that you have some special
[04:36:48] thing that's going to happen here and
[04:36:50] some special opportunity that happens
[04:36:51] here and some special opportunity that
[04:36:53] happens here. What most people try and
[04:36:55] do is they don't want to take they don't
[04:36:56] want to work at all and then they're
[04:36:58] like, "Oh, I'm just going to work here
[04:36:59] and then I'm going to work here and then
[04:37:01] I'm going to work here." But the
[04:37:03] likelihood that you're there in these
[04:37:04] three moments is very low if you're
[04:37:06] trying to time it. But if you work the
[04:37:08] whole time, then the timing will always
[04:37:11] be perfect because you will be ready.
[04:37:13] And so perfect timing is a complete
[04:37:14] myth, but perfect preparation isn't. And
[04:37:17] that on a long enough time horizon, your
[04:37:18] opportunity will come. People think that
[04:37:20] they need perfect conditions to start
[04:37:22] when in reality starting is the perfect
[04:37:24] condition. It creates the perfect
[04:37:25] condition for opportunity to be
[04:37:27] capitalized on. And I can tell you this
[04:37:29] from firsthand experience with me like
[04:37:30] the more you do, the more you see you
[04:37:33] can do. And so opportunities multiply
[04:37:37] with skill. And so the better you get at
[04:37:40] doing stuff, the more things you know
[04:37:41] you would be able to do and win at. And
[04:37:44] so the goal is to gain as many skills as
[04:37:46] possible so that you have access to the
[04:37:48] maximum number of potential
[04:37:50] opportunities. A lot of people were
[04:37:51] thinking that, oh, I'm going to wait for
[04:37:52] the right moment. But when you have
[04:37:54] unlimited skills, like Elon can go do
[04:37:56] whatever he wants. He could build a city
[04:37:58] in the middle of the ocean. And so he
[04:38:00] could do that. He has the skills because
[04:38:03] the world of opportunities open to him.
[04:38:05] He also spent all of his younger years
[04:38:07] just developing all these different
[04:38:08] skills, becoming a polymath across all
[04:38:10] these different things, independent,
[04:38:11] political stuff. Put it away. The point
[04:38:12] is the guy is good. All right. And so
[04:38:14] the goal is to get good and then you
[04:38:16] will never have a shortage of
[04:38:17] opportunities. Number seven, envy
[04:38:22] versus effort. All right. Let me break
[04:38:24] this down. If people worked for their
[04:38:27] goals as hard as they envy others for
[04:38:30] achieving them, they would already have
[04:38:31] achieved them themselves. So think about
[04:38:34] the amount of mental effort that goes
[04:38:35] into the hate that people spew out, the
[04:38:37] envy for wanting other people's stuff.
[04:38:39] I'll give you a couple hard truths about
[04:38:41] this. Number one, no one is doing as
[04:38:43] well as you think they are. So, by
[04:38:45] comparison, you're actually better off
[04:38:46] than you think. Number two, you don't
[04:38:48] win by beating people. You win by
[04:38:51] growing into your potential and then
[04:38:52] allowing them to shrink into irrelevance
[04:38:54] by consequence. Three, and guess what?
[04:38:58] Your biggest threat is not your
[04:39:00] competition. It's a mediocre version of
[04:39:03] you that never realized what you could
[04:39:05] become. And as pathy as that may sound,
[04:39:08] it's also true, right? A lot of people
[04:39:10] think it's like ah, you know, that guy's
[04:39:12] doing really well. It's like his doing
[04:39:13] well changes nothing about your reality.
[04:39:17] Something really ironic that I noticed
[04:39:18] is that the people who get copied the
[04:39:21] most by their competition are the people
[04:39:23] who ignore the competition who are
[04:39:24] copying them. Fundamentally, you start
[04:39:27] by focusing on the customer and if you
[04:39:29] always put the customer first, everyone
[04:39:31] will copy you because you're actually
[04:39:32] doing the thing that will work, which is
[04:39:34] focusing on the customer. And there's a
[04:39:35] lot of weird things in life like that
[04:39:36] where like it's the opposite is what you
[04:39:38] what you'd think like oh I'm going to
[04:39:40] look at what everyone else is. It's like
[04:39:41] no just do what matters most and then
[04:39:43] people who don't know how to think will
[04:39:45] just copy you. Real threat is that no
[04:39:47] one copies you at all because you're
[04:39:48] doing nothing. If you take all this
[04:39:50] effort that you look that you put into
[04:39:52] comparing yourself to other people that
[04:39:53] you look to kind of like tearing them
[04:39:55] down sometimes even in your mind. Let's
[04:39:56] be real. Maybe you don't say it to other
[04:39:57] people, but in your mind you're like me
[04:40:00] that whatever that is, whatever that
[04:40:01] feeling is that just do that towards you
[04:40:05] not being good enough. What happens is
[04:40:07] that when you do that, all of that
[04:40:08] effort, all that energy goes into
[04:40:10] improving yourself rather than tearing
[04:40:11] down somebody else. And only one of
[04:40:13] those things will help you. Number
[04:40:14] eight, hard conversations create
[04:40:16] opportunities. Hard truth, everything
[04:40:19] you want is on the other side of a few
[04:40:21] hard conversations that you have been
[04:40:22] putting off. People either grow into
[04:40:24] their potential or they keep living the
[04:40:26] same six months of their life over and
[04:40:27] over again. And the difference is how
[04:40:29] many hard conversations you're willing
[04:40:31] to have and how fast you have them once
[04:40:33] you realize you need to. If you sherk
[04:40:35] away from this, and I get it. I'm
[04:40:36] somebody who like it for a very long
[04:40:38] time had a hard time having hard
[04:40:39] conversations, right? Like I literally
[04:40:40] traveled across the country before I
[04:40:42] told my dad that I left. All right? Like
[04:40:43] I get it. So if you think having
[04:40:46] uncomfortable conversations is hard,
[04:40:48] just wait until you see the result of
[04:40:50] not having them. It will be harder.
[04:40:52] Basically, the the struggle is that you
[04:40:54] have short-term pain versus long-term
[04:40:56] pain. And long-term pain, I call regret.
[04:40:59] Comfort is short gain. Regret is long
[04:41:03] pain. Fear is short pain. Fulfillment is
[04:41:08] long gain. You want to trade short pains
[04:41:11] for long gains, not short gains for long
[04:41:14] pains. It's not the safe bet. It's a
[04:41:17] guaranteed loss just later. All right.
[04:41:20] So, I'm going to I'm going to spell this
[04:41:21] out. This is short pain.
[04:41:26] This is long pain.
[04:41:30] This is short
[04:41:33] gain.
[04:41:34] This is long
[04:41:36] gain.
[04:41:39] You want to trade short pain for long
[04:41:43] gain.
[04:41:45] That's the goal. It's the best trade.
[04:41:48] Number nine, endure. There's a reason
[04:41:51] that when I gave instructions to some of
[04:41:53] the new business owners who were going
[04:41:54] to start, you know, putting a community
[04:41:56] on school, one of the sole instructions
[04:41:58] I gave them was learn to endure. And so,
[04:42:01] the fastest way to become the person you
[04:42:02] want to be is to put yourself in a
[04:42:04] situation where you have no choice but
[04:42:05] to become them. You'd be amazed at what
[04:42:07] you can endure when you have no choice.
[04:42:09] For me, when I signed my lease for my
[04:42:12] gym, I had $5,000 in my bank account.
[04:42:15] The rent was $5,000. I had never really
[04:42:18] made money before. And so I was like,
[04:42:20] "Oh, wow. How does this work? If I made
[04:42:23] 100% of the money that I had made in my
[04:42:25] job, I would have been able to pay rent
[04:42:27] and have no food or anything else." But
[04:42:29] one of my favorite flavor texts on Magic
[04:42:31] cards is necessity is the mother of
[04:42:33] invention, right? It's the constraints
[04:42:35] that create the innovation that is
[04:42:38] required to get you out of the
[04:42:40] constraint, to get you out of the hard
[04:42:41] time. And so when I think back on like
[04:42:43] human history, sometimes we think that
[04:42:45] things that were going through our
[04:42:46] heart, but they're certainly much easier
[04:42:47] than the things that other humans have
[04:42:49] endured. And how did they endure them?
[04:42:51] Well, when the only choice they had was
[04:42:53] die or endure, you tend to endure.
[04:42:55] Number 10, results. Excuses. This is not
[04:42:57] going to be a big surprise here. The
[04:42:59] thing with excuses that's interesting is
[04:43:01] that they may be valid. And I think
[04:43:03] that's the part that people struggle
[04:43:04] with is that they're like, "Yeah,
[04:43:07] obviously results matter more excuses,
[04:43:09] but insert special snowflake." The thing
[04:43:12] is is that like you might be right. And
[04:43:15] I just like this quote from Ila. She
[04:43:17] says, "It's not your fault, but it is
[04:43:19] still your problem. You still have to do
[04:43:21] something about it. Or you can just wait
[04:43:23] and say, you know what? I'm going to
[04:43:25] continue to not live the life that I
[04:43:27] want until I die." And everyone will be
[04:43:29] like, "Oh yeah, he had an excuse. That's
[04:43:33] why."
[04:43:35] Right? Is that what like is that what
[04:43:37] you really want? is that people were
[04:43:39] like, "Yeah, he had an excuse."
[04:43:43] Like that's it. Like you like like it's
[04:43:45] a weird thing to want a permission slip
[04:43:48] for mediocrity, which is fundamentally
[04:43:51] what excuses are. You just want
[04:43:53] permission from everyone else to still
[04:43:54] get respect without the outcome
[04:43:58] because of your extenduating
[04:44:00] circumstances. And the thing is is
[04:44:02] there's a ton of lure, but the only
[04:44:04] person who actually believes that is
[04:44:05] you. People might not along. People who
[04:44:07] love you might say, "Yeah, you know
[04:44:09] what? You are special. You are a special
[04:44:10] snowflake. Your mama might still love
[04:44:11] you." But like, you're not going to earn
[04:44:13] anyone's respect. And I think you
[04:44:16] certainly won't earn the respect of the
[04:44:17] person that matters most, which is you
[04:44:20] cuz you'll always know that you could
[04:44:21] have done more, that you could have done
[04:44:22] better. That's the one that keeps me up.
[04:44:25] I have a saying that I tell myself a lot
[04:44:27] when I'm doing something that I don't
[04:44:28] want to do, and it's I will do what is
[04:44:31] required. It's not about doing your
[04:44:33] best. It's about doing what's required
[04:44:34] because what's required might be better
[04:44:36] than your best is right now. But the
[04:44:37] good news is that your best can get
[04:44:38] better. So number 11, and this is this
[04:44:41] one's real. All right. The hard way is
[04:44:44] the easy way. You're like, "How does
[04:44:46] that work?" The hard way is the easy way
[04:44:49] because the easy way
[04:44:52] never gets you there. So think about it.
[04:44:54] People always are looking for the
[04:44:56] shortcut, but you have to accept a very
[04:44:58] simple truth, which is that the shortcut
[04:45:00] never actually takes you to the place
[04:45:01] that you're trying to go. And it's
[04:45:03] because it's rarely one big thing. And I
[04:45:06] would postulate, fancy word, right? That
[04:45:10] there are a lot of shortcuts that exist
[04:45:11] in life. Wait for it. Wait for it. And
[04:45:14] everyone already uses those. And so
[04:45:15] whenever an actual shortcut gets found,
[04:45:18] all humans immediately do it and it no
[04:45:20] longer becomes a shortcut. It's just a
[04:45:22] thing that everyone does and it's not
[04:45:23] really a thing anymore. Like we learned
[04:45:25] how to tie knots. That was a big
[04:45:26] breakthrough. And then everyone ties
[04:45:27] their shoes and they're like, "Oh my
[04:45:28] god, let me show you the shortcut to
[04:45:30] this." It's like, "Oh, you tie." Like,
[04:45:31] "Oh my god, everyone does it." and it's
[04:45:32] like not a thing anymore, right? And so
[04:45:34] all the things that you want to have
[04:45:36] that most people don't have don't have
[04:45:37] shortcuts. But thing is is so many
[04:45:39] people waste so much time. They
[04:45:40] literally waste longer than it would
[04:45:42] have taken the hard way or the only way
[04:45:45] to get there in search of the easy way
[04:45:47] that doesn't exist. And so the reality
[04:45:50] of this is that it's usually a hundred
[04:45:52] [snorts] small things that make days,
[04:45:54] weeks, and months hard. It's the
[04:45:56] neverending onslaught of [ __ ] And then
[04:45:58] you remember after going through that
[04:46:00] onslaught of [ __ ] that you signed up for
[04:46:02] this, but then again, you figured that
[04:46:04] it would be hard. And then you're
[04:46:06] reminded that this is what hard feels
[04:46:08] like. And so you keep going because it's
[04:46:10] the only choice you have. I want to
[04:46:12] remind you that a lot of times what we
[04:46:14] imagine hard to be is different than how
[04:46:17] we experience hard because the nature of
[04:46:19] hard changes, too. And it's more of a
[04:46:22] limitation in how we describe hardship
[04:46:24] than it is. And I actually think there's
[04:46:26] a big problem with this. So, just kind
[04:46:27] of like Eskimos have like seven
[04:46:29] different words for snow. I feel like I
[04:46:31] should have like 25 different words for
[04:46:33] hard, right? [laughter] Like the amount
[04:46:35] of things that you go through. There's
[04:46:37] like lifestyle hard like, okay, so
[04:46:39] there's sacrifice hard of like you're
[04:46:40] giving up things that you enjoy. There's
[04:46:42] also like effort hard of like starting
[04:46:44] to do things that you hate doing that
[04:46:45] you're not good at. There's risk hard of
[04:46:47] the the fact that you could lose
[04:46:49] something that you currently have,
[04:46:50] right? That you have the chance of
[04:46:52] losing what you currently have. You have
[04:46:53] the uncertainty heart of the fact that
[04:46:55] you might be doing all of the sacrifice
[04:46:57] for nothing. There's lots of different
[04:46:59] flavors of heart and each one of them
[04:47:00] presents at different times and for some
[04:47:02] reason when it gets a new kind of heart,
[04:47:04] it's a new seventh type of snowflake
[04:47:06] heart, then you're like, "Oh, this is
[04:47:08] different." But it's not. It's just that
[04:47:10] the thing that you grow comfortable
[04:47:12] with, then you conquer and then you're
[04:47:15] exposed to a new level. And so, I love
[04:47:17] this quote from Paul Graham. He said,
[04:47:19] "If you want to make a million dollars,
[04:47:21] you have to endure a million dollars
[04:47:22] worth of pain." Fundamentally, in my
[04:47:24] opinion, the people who who who end up
[04:47:26] building building, not inheriting,
[04:47:28] building tremendous wealth just have
[04:47:31] massive concentrations of pain. So,
[04:47:33] don't go looking for the easy way
[04:47:34] because it will never get you there.
[04:47:36] Number 12, don't, this is a big one,
[04:47:39] don't give away your power. Now, this
[04:47:42] sounds very like, you know, girl power
[04:47:43] or a little uh little like rahrh, but I
[04:47:46] will I will break this down in a little
[04:47:47] bit less rahrh way. So, what offends you
[04:47:51] controls you. Whatever you point your
[04:47:54] finger of blame towards is what also you
[04:47:56] point your power towards. Meaning, we
[04:47:58] talked about excuses earlier. I can't do
[04:48:01] it because insert X. Insert X is the
[04:48:04] thing that has power over your life. And
[04:48:05] I remember when I realized this was that
[04:48:07] I had this belief that I would never be
[04:48:09] able to be in a long-term committed
[04:48:11] relationship because my mother had hurt
[04:48:13] me as a child. I didn't get enough hugs.
[04:48:15] Who gives a [ __ ] Whatever. But I
[04:48:17] realized that by using that excuse and
[04:48:21] by saying it's her fault I'm broken.
[04:48:24] It's her fault I can't trust people.
[04:48:26] It's her fault I can't love anybody. By
[04:48:28] by saying that over and over again, all
[04:48:30] I did was I said, "My mother controls
[04:48:34] how my love life will go." Oo, heavy
[04:48:39] real. Well, I don't want her to have
[04:48:41] control over how I choose to love or not
[04:48:44] love or how how content I get in a
[04:48:46] relationship or anything like that. So,
[04:48:48] I actively had to say, "Maybe all these
[04:48:50] things happened. Maybe they didn't.
[04:48:52] Also, who cares? Me. I care. I'm the one
[04:48:55] who's affected by this." And what's
[04:48:56] crazy about this, it's kind of a weird
[04:48:57] thing with like parents is that you
[04:49:00] think by hurting yourself, you get back
[04:49:03] at them for hurting you. And you do hurt
[04:49:05] them when you hurt yourself, but you
[04:49:07] hurt you more at some point. And this is
[04:49:10] like this is like super real.
[04:49:13] Let's say that you were parented tough,
[04:49:15] whatever that means for you. You had
[04:49:17] lots of bad things happen, okay? And it
[04:49:19] was probably because you were a child
[04:49:20] trying to deal with the world without
[04:49:21] the skills of dealing with the world as
[04:49:22] an adult. But you have these things
[04:49:25] happen, right? And on some level, you
[04:49:28] might believe that you becoming
[04:49:30] successful, you making it work,
[04:49:32] validates the way that you were
[04:49:34] parented. And so you have this conflict
[04:49:37] where you're like, well, I don't want
[04:49:38] them to think that they did a good job
[04:49:40] by me being successful.
[04:49:42] And so then you want to keep not being
[04:49:45] successful to prove to them and to hurt
[04:49:47] them for hurting you.
[04:49:52] and you stay there as long as you want
[04:49:54] them to control you.
[04:49:57] And so the day that you choose to
[04:49:59] control yourself is the day that you
[04:50:01] choose to divorce your results from the
[04:50:05] very viable reasons that you have to not
[04:50:08] win.
[04:50:10] You are right. And so what? Number 13,
[04:50:13] rejection versus regret. At some point,
[04:50:18] everyone needs to choose whether they'd
[04:50:19] rather risk rejection now or guarantee
[04:50:21] regret later. And so, losers fear
[04:50:23] rejection, winners fear regret. And most
[04:50:26] attempts fail of anything. Failure is
[04:50:29] literally a prerequisite for success.
[04:50:31] And one of the one of my favorite quotes
[04:50:33] of mine is greatness rejects all
[04:50:37] first-time applicants. And so, it's kind
[04:50:39] of like that person that just is like,
[04:50:41] "Oh, I can't get a job." And you're
[04:50:43] like, "What have you done?" They're
[04:50:43] like, "Well, I applied somewhere." And
[04:50:45] you're like, "What do you mean?" They're
[04:50:46] like, "I applied somewhere." And you're
[04:50:48] like, "And?" And and they're like,
[04:50:50] "Yeah." And I and I didn't I didn't get
[04:50:52] the job. They didn't even call me. And
[04:50:53] you're like, "You went to one place?"
[04:50:55] And you're like, and they're like,
[04:50:56] "Yeah." This is going to be a really
[04:50:57] good analogy for somebody who's
[04:50:59] listening to this only for people who
[04:51:00] don't have a business yet. A lot of
[04:51:02] starting a business is the number of
[04:51:04] reachouts that you had to do in order to
[04:51:06] get the path, the job, the career that
[04:51:08] you want right now. So, think about the
[04:51:11] amount of interviews. Think about the
[04:51:13] amount of outreach. Think about the
[04:51:14] amount of job ads. Think about the
[04:51:15] amount of resumes that you sent out.
[04:51:17] Think about all of that. And all of that
[04:51:19] work got you what I would consider one
[04:51:21] sale. You got one person to say yes to
[04:51:23] you and they would give you money for
[04:51:24] work. All right? Now, obviously within
[04:51:26] the context of an employee relationship,
[04:51:27] but fundamentally actually works the
[04:51:28] same way. All you do in a business is
[04:51:31] the same thing. If you can handle that
[04:51:33] level of rejection, then you can handle
[04:51:35] the same level of rejection in a
[04:51:36] business. It's not actually that
[04:51:38] different. The question is whether you
[04:51:39] can handle that level of regret years
[04:51:41] later for not doing it. And I'll say
[04:51:43] this, one of the things that I've
[04:51:44] noticed between champions and everyone
[04:51:45] else is that people everyone else is so
[04:51:48] excited when they win. They're so
[04:51:50] excited, you know, by the idea of them
[04:51:52] getting first place. But there's a
[04:51:53] reason that they never get first place.
[04:51:55] It's because they're excited about it.
[04:51:57] The people who always and very
[04:51:58] consistently hit first place and win the
[04:52:00] championships are relieved because they
[04:52:02] tend to hate losing more than they love
[04:52:04] winning.
[04:52:05] and they expected to win because of the
[04:52:07] level of preparation they had compared
[04:52:08] to everyone else.
[04:52:10] Which brings me very magically to number
[04:52:13] 14. Consistency beats talent. So listen
[04:52:16] to this. You can beat most people at
[04:52:19] anything if you just stick with it for a
[04:52:21] year. You can become competent at just
[04:52:23] about any skill in 20 hours. It's just
[04:52:25] that people will wait 10 years to get
[04:52:27] the first 20 hours logged, right? Like
[04:52:29] if you want to learn how to play the
[04:52:30] first few notes of a guitar, you can
[04:52:32] learn in about 20 hours. Now, are you
[04:52:34] gonna be Jimmyi Hendricks? Which Jenzie,
[04:52:37] who's a guitarist, Purple Haze, you can
[04:52:38] look it up. Anyways, the point is is
[04:52:40] that people have this huge delay before
[04:52:42] they begin. And what make things hard
[04:52:45] isn't complexity, it's consistency. And
[04:52:49] so, as boring as it is, you just have to
[04:52:51] keep doing it before you get anything
[04:52:52] back. So, one of my favorite quotes from
[04:52:55] myself is the world belongs to those who
[04:52:58] can keep doing without seeing the result
[04:52:59] of their doing. You have to delay how
[04:53:02] quick you get a reward, how fast you
[04:53:05] need a cookie in order to keep going.
[04:53:06] I've been told that I'm decent at
[04:53:08] presenting and talking on stage in front
[04:53:10] of people. And what a lot of people
[04:53:14] don't see is that for years I spoke with
[04:53:18] a microphone in front of a group of
[04:53:19] people and I did it like multiple times
[04:53:22] a day and I did that in the form of a
[04:53:24] fitness session. And so I had to
[04:53:27] literally stand on a box and shout
[04:53:29] around and tell people what they had to
[04:53:30] do. And I had to do that for years. And
[04:53:34] I remember when I had to get on stage
[04:53:36] for the first time and I had in high
[04:53:40] school been very nervous to public
[04:53:41] speak. And as I was about to get up on
[04:53:44] stage, I was like, why am I not nervous
[04:53:46] about this? Like this is weird. Like I
[04:53:47] should I was like, I should be nervous.
[04:53:49] Like why am I not nervous? And I was
[04:53:50] like, I've I've done this so many times.
[04:53:53] Like so many times. And I'm not talking
[04:53:56] about, you know, Civil War history and
[04:53:59] Abraham Lincoln. I'm talking about stuff
[04:54:02] I know. Outwork your self-doubt through
[04:54:05] repetition, not affirmations.
[04:54:09] You don't do it through belief. You do
[04:54:11] it through stimuli habituation, which is
[04:54:14] just fancy words for saying you expose
[04:54:16] yourself to the bad things so many times
[04:54:18] they get used to and it's no longer a
[04:54:20] bad thing anymore. It's just life. If
[04:54:22] you want to get over a fear, the way
[04:54:23] they do it is habituation. So, if I
[04:54:25] wanted to get over, you know, being
[04:54:26] afraid of spiders. I'm not afraid of
[04:54:27] spiders, but some people are afraid of
[04:54:28] spiders, right? If you want to get over
[04:54:30] that fear, you literally lock yourself
[04:54:31] in a room with a bunch of spiders and
[04:54:34] all you do is you just have panic attack
[04:54:36] after a panic attack and you pass out
[04:54:37] and you wake up again. The tires are
[04:54:38] there. You pass out. You keep doing
[04:54:40] eventually eventually your nervous
[04:54:41] system adjusts and 5 hours later, 8
[04:54:44] hours later, you walk out of the room
[04:54:47] unafraid because you have habituated.
[04:54:50] And so, the point of practice for all of
[04:54:52] these things is to habituate. as fast as
[04:54:54] you can. And so we're trying to
[04:54:56] microwave that period of time. And the
[04:54:57] thing is, let's say it takes let's say
[04:54:58] it takes this many reps. You can have
[04:55:00] this many reps take you a year or you
[04:55:02] can have it take you a month, depending
[04:55:03] on how dedicated you are to it. Number
[04:55:05] 15, have no shame. All right. Now, I
[04:55:10] have told this before, but my plan B was
[04:55:14] that I would drive Uber and strip. Now,
[04:55:16] I think part of that was because I
[04:55:17] wanted to, you know, thumb my whatever
[04:55:19] the the Shakespearean saying, I bite my
[04:55:20] thumb at you. uh to bite my thumb at my
[04:55:22] my very respectable parents uh and say
[04:55:25] like I would take off my clothes for
[04:55:26] money. Now, of course, they would be
[04:55:27] horrified by that, but I think part of
[04:55:29] the reason I was okay with it was I was
[04:55:30] like, I'm gonna I'm going to do it my
[04:55:32] way. I want to be crystal clear here. If
[04:55:34] you have no money and you want to make
[04:55:36] money, you should have no shame. Knock,
[04:55:40] call, email, text, DM, ask.
[04:55:42] Life-changing doors do not open
[04:55:44] themselves. And sometimes I feel like
[04:55:46] shame was invented by people who have to
[04:55:48] prevent people who have not from taking
[04:55:50] action because all of this is just an
[04:55:53] illusion. What are you ashamed of?
[04:55:56] Trying. Like let's play it out. Remember
[04:55:58] I said fear only happens in the abstract
[04:56:00] not in the specific. So if you reach out
[04:56:03] to a stranger no matter what happens you
[04:56:06] always come out better than before
[04:56:08] because you either have a sale or you
[04:56:10] have an experience.
[04:56:12] Both make you better. And so the crazy
[04:56:15] thing about trying is that it has an
[04:56:17] asymmetric riskreward return. So worst
[04:56:19] case is you get a no and you learn from
[04:56:21] it. You get better. Life gives you
[04:56:22] unlimited shots while you're alive. And
[04:56:25] so if you have nothing, like you you're
[04:56:26] just basically cashing in lottery
[04:56:28] tickets and saying, "Oh my god, I lost.
[04:56:29] But what you're paying with is time."
[04:56:30] Fine. Pay more time. Get more tickets.
[04:56:32] Keep scratching. So do you know the
[04:56:34] difference between shame and guilt?
[04:56:36] Guilt is when you break your own rules.
[04:56:40] Shame is when you break other people's
[04:56:42] rules.
[04:56:44] So if you are gay and you're in a
[04:56:49] religious community, you would probably
[04:56:51] feel shame. If you also share that
[04:56:54] religious community's rule set, you
[04:56:56] would also feel guilt. If, let's say,
[04:56:58] you were in a very liberal progressive
[04:57:01] environment, you might feel neither
[04:57:03] shame nor guilt. And so the question is,
[04:57:06] whose rules are you following? If you
[04:57:09] have this feeling, this fear of being
[04:57:12] ashamed, then the question is, who's the
[04:57:14] one who wrote the rules that you're
[04:57:16] choosing to follow,
[04:57:18] and I can promise you it's not the
[04:57:20] people who are successful because
[04:57:22] they're the ones shouting on the
[04:57:23] rooftops telling you that it's totally
[04:57:25] different once you get in the pool. It's
[04:57:28] very different. And it's kind of like
[04:57:28] you have the lights of the world turn on
[04:57:30] and like you're living in this mirage
[04:57:32] when you're not succeeding where there's
[04:57:34] all this all this uncertainty. There's
[04:57:37] all this ambiguity. There's this fog of
[04:57:40] the unknown in front of you. But as soon
[04:57:43] as you start taking action, things
[04:57:44] become very crystal clear. I think
[04:57:46] there's there's I'm sure some stoic
[04:57:47] analogy that said this, but basically
[04:57:49] like if you've ever walked through very
[04:57:50] dense fog, you can only see a couple
[04:57:52] steps in front of you. The only thing
[04:57:54] that you can do in fog is just start
[04:57:57] walking. And as you walk, more steps
[04:58:00] become available to you. And so there's
[04:58:02] this misconception that you're going to
[04:58:04] be able to see the entire path ahead of
[04:58:06] you. But it has two fundamental
[04:58:08] fallacies in front of it. Number one is
[04:58:10] that you have the right vision to be
[04:58:12] able to see that far with your current
[04:58:14] skill set and resources, which you don't
[04:58:16] because imagine today all of your
[04:58:19] conditions change. If you had more
[04:58:20] skills, which is hard to imagine cuz you
[04:58:22] can't imagine what it's like to have the
[04:58:23] skill, but maybe let's say you have
[04:58:25] resources that you didn't have before.
[04:58:27] Well, that would probably change the way
[04:58:28] you play the game. So, trying to play
[04:58:30] out and try and play 17 steps in advance
[04:58:33] when the game itself is going to change
[04:58:35] and you as a player are going to change.
[04:58:37] The only thing that you can boil all of
[04:58:40] this down to is to take the steps that
[04:58:44] you can see in front of you one at a
[04:58:46] time. And I would write this down of
[04:58:48] like what are the things that are
[04:58:51] stopping me? And more specifically,
[04:58:53] whose voice do I hear? Whose voice or
[04:58:56] judgment am I afraid of? Because usually
[04:58:58] it's people. It's society is what we
[04:59:00] say, but it's usually like two people.
[04:59:03] And I remember when I had this big
[04:59:04] decision that I had to make when I was
[04:59:06] considering selling gym lunch. I thought
[04:59:08] that $46 million was not a lot of money
[04:59:11] for the business. Now, some of you may
[04:59:12] hear this and be like, "Oh my god,
[04:59:13] that's amazing." But believe it or not,
[04:59:14] at before we before COVID happened, uh,
[04:59:17] Gym Launch was valed 150 million. And so
[04:59:19] for me, going from 150 to 50 or, you
[04:59:21] know, 46, it felt small, right? It felt
[04:59:24] like a really small number. And I
[04:59:26] remember there was a particular person,
[04:59:28] we'll call it a friend of me, if you
[04:59:29] will, that I thought would think that
[04:59:31] they were better than me if I sold for
[04:59:35] this small number.
[04:59:37] And when I was able to narrow it down to
[04:59:39] just that one person's voice, I thought
[04:59:41] to myself, am I going to give that
[04:59:45] person power over my entire life? Which
[04:59:48] is literally what it was. I was choosing
[04:59:50] not to make a decision because of
[04:59:51] someone else. That person has complete
[04:59:53] power over me. And I was like, well,
[04:59:55] that's a terrible reason not to do this.
[04:59:58] And the crazier part is that even if
[05:00:02] you're right and that person does say
[05:00:05] that you suck,
[05:00:07] so what? Most people don't want you to
[05:00:10] win. And even if you do win, they will
[05:00:12] try and do a reverse excuse, which is
[05:00:14] called a justification for why you
[05:00:16] should be excused of the respect that
[05:00:17] you should earn for having won. He just
[05:00:20] has good genetics. He has great parents.
[05:00:23] He uh, you know, inherited his wealth.
[05:00:26] He had connect good connections. She was
[05:00:28] born in America. He speaks English. He's
[05:00:29] a man. He's white. He's whatever you
[05:00:31] want.
[05:00:36] But giving the person justifications in
[05:00:38] no way helps you. You might be right.
[05:00:40] And so what? Like it's it's so funny.
[05:00:42] It's like let's say you have some
[05:00:44] advantage, whatever it is, right?
[05:00:46] Whatever whatever advantage you're born
[05:00:47] with, right? You might have one.
[05:00:50] It's kind of the thing same thing as the
[05:00:51] parent thing. It's like, well, I don't
[05:00:53] want to be successful because I don't
[05:00:54] want to prove that I had this advantage.
[05:00:56] It's like, would you prefer to prove
[05:00:58] everyone wrong by saying I had this
[05:01:00] advantage and I also wasted it? I
[05:01:02] remember I'll tell you a story and I
[05:01:04] think it'll probably that'll that'll
[05:01:05] round this off well. So, when I was
[05:01:07] younger, I didn't want to be a doctor,
[05:01:08] but that was pretty much the path that
[05:01:09] was laid out in front of me. And so, my
[05:01:11] father's a successful doctor and I I was
[05:01:14] like, it's it's it's cheating, you know,
[05:01:16] to to, you know, just assume your
[05:01:18] practice and just like immediately have
[05:01:20] a practice that makes a lot of money.
[05:01:22] and he said, "Do you think Shaq
[05:01:26] when he was 7 feet tall was like,"It
[05:01:28] wouldn't be fair for me to play
[05:01:29] basketball. Other people aren't as tall
[05:01:31] as me." And I always remember that. He's
[05:01:34] like, "You play the cards you're dealt.
[05:01:35] These are the cards you have. Play
[05:01:37] them." And I remember thinking that as
[05:01:39] now obviously I didn't decide to be a
[05:01:41] doctor, but the reason that I didn't
[05:01:43] want to do it was because I thought
[05:01:44] other people would say that I would they
[05:01:46] would disqualify away my success as not
[05:01:49] earned by me.
[05:01:51] when the reality is that they're all
[05:01:53] going to disqualify your sex no matter
[05:01:54] what because it makes them feel bad and
[05:01:57] so [ __ ] them. But if you have some
[05:02:00] cards, for the love of God, play them.
[05:02:02] 2026 is going to be an interesting year.
[05:02:04] Reports just came out that for Black
[05:02:06] Friday, 95% of purchases were financed.
[05:02:08] 67% of them were from people who didn't
[05:02:11] plan on paying it off in the next 30
[05:02:12] days, which is a very negative indicator
[05:02:15] for consumer strength. And everything
[05:02:17] starts with consumers and then it
[05:02:18] bubbles up to B2B. And so if you're a
[05:02:20] business in general, this will affect
[05:02:22] you. And so there's good news and bad
[05:02:24] news. The bad news is businesses that do
[05:02:27] not change the way they behave when the
[05:02:29] environment changes get left behind.
[05:02:32] It's called adapt or die. On the other
[05:02:35] hand, the good news is that when all the
[05:02:38] other lagards and the slow to move
[05:02:40] businesses don't respond, those
[05:02:41] customers still exist. And so some of
[05:02:43] the best companies that you've heard of
[05:02:45] actually grew the most during economic
[05:02:47] downturns because it's a redistribution
[05:02:50] of customers and market share during
[05:02:52] these truncated periods of time. And so
[05:02:54] it's highly likely that in the next 18
[05:02:56] months, 12 months, 6 months even, there
[05:02:59] could be a softening of demand. And so
[05:03:01] if your business is set up so that you
[05:03:03] have more reliable lead genen from
[05:03:04] multiple sources and a team that's in
[05:03:07] place that can actually continue to run
[05:03:08] the business and potentially continue to
[05:03:10] increase your margins because of AI,
[05:03:12] because of automation, then your
[05:03:14] business can be one of the winners. So
[05:03:16] if that's not in place in your business
[05:03:17] and you'd like it to be, I'd love to
[05:03:18] invite you out to two days here in Vegas
[05:03:20] with my team to a scaling workshop where
[05:03:22] we walk you through the things that
[05:03:23] we're doing at acquisition.com and our
[05:03:25] portfolio companies to help them scale
[05:03:26] in 2026. So if that sounds at all
[05:03:28] interesting, click book call. love to
[05:03:30] have you out here. Before I had my $46
[05:03:32] million exit, I went completely broke
[05:03:34] twice. Starting from zero multiple times
[05:03:37] taught me what actually matters. And so,
[05:03:39] here's everything I learned. I hit $100
[05:03:41] million in net worth at age 31, but
[05:03:44] before that, I lost all my money twice.
[05:03:46] And the difference between me losing all
[05:03:48] my money the first two times and now are
[05:03:51] these rules. [music] So, this is no
[05:03:53] advice for making money and keeping it.
[05:03:55] Number one, passive income is a lie. If
[05:03:58] you think about how money is made, you
[05:04:00] make money during time because every
[05:04:03] minute we're alive, a minute passes,
[05:04:04] time passes, and we make money over that
[05:04:07] time period. Which means every single
[05:04:09] person on planet Earth has a dollars per
[05:04:11] hour that they make. And so it's not
[05:04:13] that passive income doesn't exist just
[05:04:16] as much as active income doesn't exist.
[05:04:18] It's a spectrum where it's how active is
[05:04:22] it or how passive is the activity that
[05:04:25] I'm doing relative to the time that I'm
[05:04:27] investing. And so I would eliminate
[05:04:30] active versus passive and simply say
[05:04:32] what is my return on time or how much do
[05:04:34] I make per hour. It's just that most
[05:04:36] people get really scared of that like no
[05:04:38] one should trade their hours for money.
[05:04:40] Everyone trades their hours for money.
[05:04:42] It's just that when they receive the
[05:04:43] money it's just not denoted in hours.
[05:04:46] And so I think there's two downstream
[05:04:47] impacts in terms of changing your
[05:04:49] behavior around this that I had to
[05:04:50] apply. Number one is that I was obsessed
[05:04:53] with trying to find quick, easy, low,
[05:04:57] you know, effort money things. And so I
[05:04:59] ended up spending tons of money on
[05:05:01] things that I was obsessed with, hoping
[05:05:04] would cost me no time to make. And I
[05:05:07] would put not nearly enough time to the
[05:05:10] things I was actively making money with
[05:05:12] and thinking, how could I just make my
[05:05:14] active income significantly higher. And
[05:05:17] I would get obsessed with the idea that
[05:05:20] everything I did actively had to be
[05:05:23] scalable or it wasn't worth it. Because
[05:05:25] if it's not scalable, then why why
[05:05:28] should I bother? I shouldn't trade my
[05:05:29] time for money. But if I looked at what
[05:05:31] I was making over the last year and
[05:05:33] divided it by the amount of money I made
[05:05:35] per hour, this activity was 15 times
[05:05:38] what I was averaging per hour. So I
[05:05:40] should absolutely do as many hours of
[05:05:42] that until all of my hours are that and
[05:05:45] then I should find something else I can
[05:05:47] trade my time for that's even higher.
[05:05:49] And so if you want a very humbling
[05:05:50] experience, look at how much you made
[05:05:53] last year and then divide it by 2,000.
[05:05:56] If you want to know how much you made
[05:05:58] just in a 40-hour work week. Now, if you
[05:06:01] want to look at how much you made per
[05:06:02] actual hour of being alive, you can
[05:06:04] divide it by around 8,000 or just take
[05:06:07] that number and divide it by four. And
[05:06:09] that's actually how much you make per
[05:06:11] hour. And so when you're looking at is
[05:06:14] this worth my time, if it's more than
[05:06:16] that number, it probably is. And so what
[05:06:19] I should have done and what changed for
[05:06:20] me was that I stopped trying to invest
[05:06:23] my money from my active into trying to
[05:06:25] find more passive things and tried to
[05:06:28] say how do I invest my money more into
[05:06:30] my active to multiply my active that I
[05:06:33] know is working. Number two, if you
[05:06:34] can't buy it twice, don't buy it once or
[05:06:36] even buy it three times or four times or
[05:06:39] five times over, don't buy it once. And
[05:06:41] the way that really shifted how I
[05:06:43] started spending money, or rather
[05:06:45] started saving money and not spending
[05:06:47] money, was when I started looking at how
[05:06:50] much time it took me to make the amount
[05:06:52] of money post tax to buy whatever I
[05:06:55] wanted. And I remember this clear as
[05:06:57] day. I was working at Smoothie King as a
[05:06:59] blender tender and I was making 675 an
[05:07:02] hour and I had just gotten a raise from
[05:07:04] 625 an hour. Uh I'm dating myself.
[05:07:07] Anyways, and while I was there, the
[05:07:10] co-workers that I had and I would always
[05:07:12] go to lunch next door at Coy, which was
[05:07:13] like a sandwich shop, and it was like 13
[05:07:16] bucks for a sandwich, right? And a drink
[05:07:19] and chips and whatever, right? And so I
[05:07:20] remember looking at my check and my 675
[05:07:22] an hour after taxes and fees was like
[05:07:25] six bucks an hour. And I was like, man,
[05:07:27] I gave up two hours of my six-hour shift
[05:07:31] every shift to go buy lunch. And I was
[05:07:34] like, I'm literally giving a third of my
[05:07:36] earning away for lunch every single day.
[05:07:39] If I knew that I had to work the first
[05:07:41] two hours just to get the sandwich, I
[05:07:43] don't think I'd ever make that trade.
[05:07:44] And yet I was making it every day. And
[05:07:46] then I started thinking I'd go to the
[05:07:47] mall and be like, "Oh, do you want a new
[05:07:49] shirt?" And it was at the Gap and it was
[05:07:51] 30 bucks. And I was like, "Okay, well
[05:07:53] shoot, that's a whole shift." And I was
[05:07:54] like, "Would I work a whole shift if
[05:07:57] someone just held up a shirt that I
[05:07:58] didn't need to do it?" And I was like,
[05:08:01] "I don't think I would." And so all of a
[05:08:03] sudden it started shifting how my buying
[05:08:04] happened because I I started feeling the
[05:08:06] pain associated with what it would take
[05:08:09] if I had to do that before getting the
[05:08:12] thing I was going to buy. And it it
[05:08:14] completely changed my buying behavior.
[05:08:16] And to be very clear, saving money won't
[05:08:19] make you money, but saving money allows
[05:08:22] you to have money. And having money
[05:08:24] allows you to look further out. And when
[05:08:26] you look further out, you can take on
[05:08:28] bigger risks, which absolutely will make
[05:08:30] you more money. And when you're looking
[05:08:31] at the price of whatever the thing
[05:08:32] you're trying to buy is, obviously when
[05:08:34] I was a teenager looking at a shirt, I
[05:08:36] was looking at, okay, I'm making six
[05:08:38] bucks an hour. A shirt's 30 bucks. But
[05:08:40] when you're an adult and you're making
[05:08:41] $100 an hour and you're looking at a
[05:08:43] $500 or $1,000 purchase, would you work
[05:08:46] two days in order to do that? I don't
[05:08:49] know. Would I? Probably not. And
[05:08:51] sometimes you think, hey, is uh would I
[05:08:53] work all day for two days to go out with
[05:08:56] the boys for three hours on Saturday? I
[05:08:59] I'd probably be like, "Guys, I'm not
[05:09:01] going to work for two days just to go
[05:09:02] have three hours of fun, right? That
[05:09:04] feel like I'd rather just not work the
[05:09:06] two days." And that was the thing is
[05:09:08] whenever I had the well, I'd rather just
[05:09:09] not work than do that thing, then I was
[05:09:13] like, I shouldn't buy that thing. For
[05:09:14] example, when I was poor, I only spent
[05:09:16] cash. And so, my easiest way of actually
[05:09:19] creating a budget was that I had a
[05:09:20] personal training client who paid me
[05:09:21] $2,000 a month in cash. And so 100% of
[05:09:24] my money that came in through the
[05:09:25] business and credit cards and everything
[05:09:27] else is just what went into my bank
[05:09:29] account. And the only thing I knew I
[05:09:30] could live on was was inside of my
[05:09:32] wallet. And so as that got replenished
[05:09:34] and the thing is is that I'm so scared
[05:09:35] with money or I was so frugal with money
[05:09:38] that I would always make sure that I had
[05:09:40] more than that to make it for the next
[05:09:42] payment because sometimes the guy would
[05:09:43] take a day or two. You pay on Wednesday
[05:09:44] rather than a Monday or whatever. And I
[05:09:46] need to make sure that I have food for
[05:09:47] Chipotle. Three, most people
[05:09:49] overestimate what they can accomplish in
[05:09:50] a year and they underestimate what they
[05:09:52] can accomplish in a decade. And every
[05:09:54] new employee that I have that walks into
[05:09:57] acquisition.com, the number one thing
[05:09:59] that they say they want is growth. And I
[05:10:01] have this talk with them, which is the
[05:10:02] 10-year million-dollar contract. But
[05:10:04] it's less about the million dollars and
[05:10:06] more about take whatever your net worth
[05:10:08] is now and add a zero to it or add two
[05:10:11] zeros to it. You can accomplish that in
[05:10:13] a decade. If you look at the biggest
[05:10:15] companies in the entire world who were
[05:10:17] worth multiple billions from their
[05:10:19] inception until the time they were worth
[05:10:20] multiple billions, many times it's under
[05:10:22] 10 years, but it's still more than five,
[05:10:25] more than seven. And so you can
[05:10:27] accomplish life-changing crazy amounts
[05:10:30] of wealth in a decade. And so if you
[05:10:33] could write a contract to yourself and
[05:10:35] say, "I will make no money for 10 years,
[05:10:38] but on the 10th year, I will add a zero
[05:10:40] or two zeros or three zeros to my net
[05:10:43] worth. Would you do it?" And if the
[05:10:46] answer is yes, which it almost
[05:10:47] invariably is with every person who
[05:10:48] comes into my business, then I say,
[05:10:50] "Great. Now act like it." And so if you
[05:10:53] knew that you would make this amount of
[05:10:55] money over that period of time, you
[05:10:56] would stop this obsession, myself
[05:10:57] included, this is me giving my advice to
[05:10:59] my myself who lost it twice. When I was
[05:11:02] able to shift to, okay, what would I
[05:11:05] have to do that would make it
[05:11:06] unreasonable that I don't 10x in 10
[05:11:09] years, then all of a sudden I started
[05:11:11] making very reasonable bets that I knew
[05:11:13] would compound unto itself over that
[05:11:16] period of time. And then winning became
[05:11:18] inevitable rather than a game of chance.
[05:11:21] And so oftentimes you have potential
[05:11:24] earning and then actualized earning. And
[05:11:26] usually as you're realizing the
[05:11:29] potential earning you have, you're
[05:11:30] usually losing out on your investing
[05:11:33] into that potential, right? You're
[05:11:34] realizing the potential. And that's kind
[05:11:36] of like the kid that learns one skill
[05:11:38] and then immediately says, "I'm going to
[05:11:39] start a business opportunity around this
[05:11:41] one skill that makes me $5,000 a month."
[05:11:43] or they have this one skill and say,
[05:11:45] "Hey, this this company is willing to
[05:11:47] pay me $100,000 a year to go do this
[05:11:50] skill where I have this other company
[05:11:51] that'll give me a free internship where
[05:11:53] I could 10x my potential earning in
[05:11:56] three years, but I'm going to make
[05:11:58] $35,000 a year for the three years.
[05:12:02] Which one would you take?" The problem
[05:12:03] is most people will take the $100,000
[05:12:06] now and forego the investment in self.
[05:12:09] And that's the thing is we are the asset
[05:12:10] that we invest in. And the currency we
[05:12:13] invest into ourselves in is time,
[05:12:15] experience, and skills, right? Skill is
[05:12:18] the outcome. The time and the effort is
[05:12:19] what we put into it to gain the
[05:12:21] experiences which ultimately give us the
[05:12:22] skills. But if you're in an environment
[05:12:24] where you're not compounding your
[05:12:26] potential earning, then you're actually
[05:12:28] losing out long-term. You're ripping up
[05:12:30] your million dollar or your 10x or 100x
[05:12:34] contract for a decade from now so you
[05:12:35] can get the short fast money today. And
[05:12:37] that's why in the early days when you
[05:12:39] have limited amounts of money but lots
[05:12:40] of time and energy, instead of putting
[05:12:42] your money in the S&P 500, I like to say
[05:12:45] put in the SME 500 because the asset
[05:12:49] that is you will always beat the stock
[05:12:51] market. Number four, you should only
[05:12:53] have to get rich once. In other words,
[05:12:56] don't bet what you have and need for
[05:12:58] something you don't have and don't need.
[05:13:00] And some of the gravest mistakes I made
[05:13:02] manifested in, for example, me getting
[05:13:05] into a partnership that I shouldn't have
[05:13:07] gotten into because I wanted even more
[05:13:09] faster. Now, when you get into a
[05:13:11] partnership, which is usually the time
[05:13:13] where you put the most risk on the
[05:13:14] table, one is you guarantee the largest
[05:13:17] decrease in your earning power. You pay
[05:13:19] with the most expensive thing you have,
[05:13:21] which is equity, to somebody else. And
[05:13:23] so people get obsessive about what
[05:13:25] they're they're, you know, 5% 10% later
[05:13:27] when we're making money, but day one
[05:13:30] they're like, "All right, we cut the pie
[05:13:31] in half. Oh, we cut the pie into
[05:13:33] thirds." Right up front before
[05:13:34] anything's really happened. If you work
[05:13:36] with a partner or decide to partner up
[05:13:38] with somebody, one of your friends, one
[05:13:39] of your co-workers, this is coming from
[05:13:40] somebody who has nine failed
[05:13:42] partnerships before I met Leila and then
[05:13:45] that has now worked and now I have
[05:13:46] successful partnerships. A partner needs
[05:13:49] to have one of these three things that
[05:13:51] you do not have. They either have to
[05:13:52] have money that you don't have. And then
[05:13:54] the clear contribution is that money,
[05:13:56] they need to have experience you don't
[05:13:58] have. And the clear contribution is that
[05:14:00] experience. Or number three, they have
[05:14:02] time and energy that you don't have and
[05:14:04] the clear contribution is that time and
[05:14:06] energy. And so I added that second part
[05:14:08] on is that just because someone has
[05:14:10] experience, if they're not contributing
[05:14:11] it to the partnership clearly, then
[05:14:13] you're still not going to get the
[05:14:14] benefit from it. If they have the time
[05:14:16] and the energy, but it's not clearly
[05:14:17] defined how they're going to invest that
[05:14:18] time and energy into the things so you
[05:14:20] both get a return, then it's not going
[05:14:22] to be a good partnership. And I've lost
[05:14:23] so much money in partnerships,
[05:14:25] especially early on. One of my two big
[05:14:27] losses was from a partner. And a big
[05:14:30] part of it was I was insecure and I
[05:14:32] thought I just had to have somebody else
[05:14:33] cuz I was afraid to do it on my own. If
[05:14:35] you are a business owner and you're
[05:14:37] trying to scale and you're doing a
[05:14:38] million bucks a year and you want to go
[05:14:39] bigger, go to acquisition.com, hit
[05:14:41] scale, and uh we'd love to see if we
[05:14:43] could help you out at one of the
[05:14:44] workshops we run here in Vegas. [snorts]
[05:14:47] Which brings me to number five. If you
[05:14:49] never learn to manage your time, you're
[05:14:51] never going to learn to manage your
[05:14:52] money. And so the thing is is that all
[05:14:54] of us obviously have equal amounts of
[05:14:56] time that we're given, not necessarily
[05:14:57] in life, but at least every day. And so
[05:15:00] the people who get the best returns on
[05:15:02] their money are the ones who learn how
[05:15:04] to best invest their time. And so a big
[05:15:07] misconception around money is that money
[05:15:09] in my opinion is an encapsulated version
[05:15:12] of time. And since all of us trade time
[05:15:15] for the money that we get, then it means
[05:15:17] for each person money represents a
[05:15:19] certain amount of time. And the
[05:15:20] wealthier you get, it's just that the
[05:15:22] denomination of money represents less
[05:15:24] time for you. And so for someone else,
[05:15:27] $100 may represent four hours. For a
[05:15:30] wealthier person, $100 may represent
[05:15:33] four minutes. And so it's a constant
[05:15:35] appraisal that you do on a regular
[05:15:37] basis, looking on your calendar and
[05:15:38] saying, "What things do I have here that
[05:15:41] I could trade my time for for more
[05:15:43] money?" And so again, this video is
[05:15:45] about making money overall. I'm not
[05:15:47] saying that you can't spend time with
[05:15:49] your girl, but there is a transaction
[05:15:51] cost for that time. and as long as
[05:15:53] you're willing to make the the trade,
[05:15:54] then trade it all day. But the bad
[05:15:56] trades are the one that when you
[05:15:57] actually think about it in terms of what
[05:15:59] it costs, you'd say, "I wouldn't do the
[05:16:01] trade." That's a bad deal. And so over
[05:16:04] time, if you continue to trade up how
[05:16:06] much time you invest for what it makes
[05:16:09] you, you will always make more in your
[05:16:12] income year after year after year.
[05:16:14] Number six, check your bank account
[05:16:16] before you check social media first
[05:16:18] thing in the morning. And if it hurts
[05:16:20] you to check your bank account first
[05:16:22] thing, then you need to do it even more
[05:16:24] because for me, I started not knowing
[05:16:27] where my money was going. And so I had a
[05:16:30] friend who was like, "Dude, just look."
[05:16:32] And I honestly had anxiety looking in my
[05:16:34] bank account, looking at what money was
[05:16:36] going out and all that kind of stuff.
[05:16:38] And so I started making that habit. And
[05:16:41] I had to confront it. But the crazy
[05:16:42] thing is is as I started looking at my
[05:16:45] money, as I started paying attention to
[05:16:47] my money, my money started paying
[05:16:48] attention to me and hanging around. And
[05:16:51] so Peter Ducker said, "What gets
[05:16:54] measured gets managed." And so one of
[05:16:56] the most fascinating things that I found
[05:16:58] with human behavior in any kind of
[05:17:00] change is that the first thing that you
[05:17:02] can do to improve any metric for any
[05:17:05] skill is to actually measure it. And so
[05:17:07] if you want to lose weight, if you weigh
[05:17:09] yourself every day, no matter how
[05:17:11] painful the number is. That intervention
[05:17:13] alone helps people lose weight. You
[05:17:15] don't even have to talk about diet. You
[05:17:17] don't have to tell someone to exercise.
[05:17:18] If they look at the scale every day,
[05:17:20] they become aware of it. And when you
[05:17:22] become aware of a problem, you start
[05:17:23] consciously or subconsciously making
[05:17:25] moves to change it. You have that
[05:17:27] hesitation before you put that food in
[05:17:28] your mouth. You have that hesitation
[05:17:29] before you take your wallet out when
[05:17:31] you're looking at your bank account
[05:17:32] every day. It doesn't matter what it is,
[05:17:34] whatever you're trying to improve, but
[05:17:35] look at it. confront reality and then
[05:17:38] reality will start to improve. And if
[05:17:40] you're curious, how long do you still
[05:17:42] check your bank account in every day?
[05:17:43] And I the honest truth is I stopped
[05:17:45] checking when we had about 20 million
[05:17:46] bucks. Um and so that started when I had
[05:17:49] in the hundreds to thousands
[05:17:51] uh and continue to check every day. And
[05:17:53] when I stopped checking it was I
[05:17:55] realized my daily fluctuations in in
[05:17:58] market movements and things like that
[05:18:00] across my assets. uh it like I didn't I
[05:18:03] I basically wasn't able to really see it
[05:18:05] on a daily basis. So I had to start
[05:18:07] extending my time horizon for when I
[05:18:09] would check it. So it' be monthly or
[05:18:10] quarterly that I started checking it. Uh
[05:18:12] because that way at least I know I
[05:18:14] should have some movement upwards. And
[05:18:16] that is something that if you've done
[05:18:19] checking your bank account every single
[05:18:20] day for years, you start to already have
[05:18:23] developed some of those disciplined
[05:18:25] skills, which then you can delay
[05:18:27] gratification of having saved money for
[05:18:29] a day to having saved money for a
[05:18:31] quarter. Number seven, learn how to make
[05:18:34] money before you start trying to learn
[05:18:36] how to make money make money. So, I see
[05:18:39] so many guys, especially young guys, who
[05:18:41] are like, "I've got a,000 bucks. How do
[05:18:43] I invest the $1,000?" They're trying to
[05:18:45] figure out a way to get that $1,000 to
[05:18:46] compound. They put into a compounding
[05:18:48] calculator and they're like, "Man, if I
[05:18:50] get 50% returns for the next 40 years,
[05:18:52] I'm going to be a billionaire." But the
[05:18:54] thing is is that one, it's most likely
[05:18:56] that you're going to buy a [ __ ]
[05:18:57] Dogecoin and then it's going to tank and
[05:18:59] then you're just going to lose your
[05:19:00] $1,000 and be like, "Wow, think about
[05:19:02] this. I just worked for two weeks or one
[05:19:05] month to save that $1,000 and I lost it
[05:19:08] in seconds." So, alternatively, if you
[05:19:10] take that $1,000 and you put it into how
[05:19:13] do I make more money? How do I actively
[05:19:16] improve the actions and skills that I
[05:19:17] have, that will get you far more? And
[05:19:20] that is where you invest the time rather
[05:19:22] than how do I make money make money? Cuz
[05:19:24] let's be real, you don't have much. So,
[05:19:26] take the money you have into the skill,
[05:19:28] the flow of making more money rather
[05:19:30] than trying to take this tiny thing and
[05:19:32] going from a 10% return to a 20% return.
[05:19:34] Because the hundred bucks extra that you
[05:19:36] yield on that thousand dollar, I promise
[05:19:38] you, if you learn how to add 50% to your
[05:19:41] skill set, it'll take whatever your
[05:19:42] annual earning is up by 50%. And that's
[05:19:45] going to be a hell of a lot more than
[05:19:46] 10. And that's assuming everything goes
[05:19:48] up this year, which one out of four
[05:19:50] years it doesn't. When you say you don't
[05:19:52] have time, just immediately think to
[05:19:54] yourself, I'm lying. This is [ __ ]
[05:19:57] Because every single person has between
[05:19:59] 5 to 9:00 a.m. and 5 to 9:00 p.m. every
[05:20:02] day of the week. even if you have a
[05:20:04] 40-hour job, even if you're a full-time
[05:20:06] student, because everybody has those
[05:20:08] eight hours per day. Now, the thing is
[05:20:10] is that we're not willing to make the
[05:20:12] trade-offs because we have these things
[05:20:13] that make us comfortable. Cool. If you
[05:20:15] reframe that thing as the thing that
[05:20:17] makes me comfortable today is the thing
[05:20:18] that's going to make me uncomfortable
[05:20:19] for a decade. All of a sudden, the cost
[05:20:22] of that comfort goes up. And so, then it
[05:20:25] flips to if I can become uncomfortable
[05:20:26] for today, I can be comfortable for
[05:20:28] decades. And so then you can seek out
[05:20:30] those eight hours and say, "You know
[05:20:32] what? I'm going to flip this thing." And
[05:20:33] here's the crazy part about work. Work
[05:20:35] makes you money in two ways. One, you
[05:20:38] work and you make money. And secondly,
[05:20:40] when you're working, you're not spending
[05:20:42] money. And so when you're starting out,
[05:20:44] you literally have a double effect. The
[05:20:46] the money that you're making the whole
[05:20:47] way through is stacking up because
[05:20:49] there's no drains on it either. And so
[05:20:51] one of the biggest advantages you have
[05:20:52] is that you stay busy. One of the keys
[05:20:55] to investing is patience. What is
[05:20:57] patience? Patience is figuring out
[05:20:59] activities to do in the meantime. Think
[05:21:02] about it for a second. Unpack that.
[05:21:04] Patience is figuring out what to do in
[05:21:06] the meantime. So then if the goal is to
[05:21:09] get rich, and we know that that takes
[05:21:11] time, and it takes time for money to
[05:21:14] compound and grow, then what you do in
[05:21:16] the meantime is that you work so that
[05:21:19] you have even more money to invest. And
[05:21:21] that money has the time to invest and
[05:21:23] compound while you're working. And I am
[05:21:26] so passionate about this because this
[05:21:27] isn't something that I didn't do, right?
[05:21:30] Like when I had my job in the beginning,
[05:21:32] I just wasn't really taking the time
[05:21:34] that I should have. And then I was like,
[05:21:35] you know what? I don't want to do this
[05:21:36] thing forever. I got to get ahead. But I
[05:21:38] couldn't stop doing my job. So I started
[05:21:40] spending my mornings and my evenings
[05:21:42] every day and both weekend days working
[05:21:44] on what I was going to do next. And in
[05:21:46] the beginning, that was studying for the
[05:21:48] GMAT because I thought business school
[05:21:49] was going to be the next move. But after
[05:21:51] studying for the GMAT and crushing the
[05:21:52] test, I came to another realization,
[05:21:54] which was, I'm going to go to business
[05:21:56] school because I want to start a
[05:21:57] business. Well, you know what? It's
[05:21:58] going to cost me less than two years and
[05:22:00] $180,000 plus what I didn't make during
[05:22:03] the two years of not working. I could
[05:22:05] probably net $10,000 a year of income,
[05:22:08] which is what the average business
[05:22:09] school person graduated with when I was
[05:22:11] looking at business school. And I was
[05:22:13] like, I think I could get to 10 grand a
[05:22:14] month if I had two years to work and
[05:22:16] didn't spend 180 grand and I took that
[05:22:18] money and just put it into a business.
[05:22:20] Now you're like, "Well, you didn't even
[05:22:21] have 180 grand." You're damn right I
[05:22:22] didn't. I was able to save up 50 and I
[05:22:24] was like, "I think with this 50, I'll be
[05:22:25] able to spend it to learn enough to make
[05:22:28] 10 grand a month." And that's what I
[05:22:29] did. Nine. If you don't know how you can
[05:22:31] lose money in something, then you're
[05:22:33] going to lose it. Think about this for a
[05:22:35] second. If something looks amazing and
[05:22:37] you're like, "Dude, there's no way I can
[05:22:39] lose money on this." You're absolutely
[05:22:40] going to lose your ass because of how
[05:22:42] little you actually know. And so you
[05:22:44] have to figure out one, what is my
[05:22:46] downside and all the different ways that
[05:22:49] downside can occur and then attach a
[05:22:51] reasonable likelihood that that happens
[05:22:53] and then probably multiply it by three
[05:22:56] because whenever you have your
[05:22:57] rosecolored glasses on, you're an
[05:22:59] entrepreneur or you want to be an
[05:23:00] entrepreneur, one of the quintessential
[05:23:02] traits of entrepreneurship is optimism.
[05:23:04] We are optimists. We think it's all
[05:23:06] going to work out and you have to have
[05:23:07] that level of optimism to start. But
[05:23:10] when you start, you can't continue to
[05:23:12] have that optimism around every other
[05:23:14] opportunity because then you are going
[05:23:16] to lose your ass because you're going to
[05:23:17] be split between multiple things. And so
[05:23:20] if you don't know how you can lose
[05:23:21] money, you absolutely will because it
[05:23:24] just is an index of how little you know.
[05:23:28] 10. The biggest cost that you have is
[05:23:32] ignorance. So every single month you've
[05:23:34] got your rent, you've got your food,
[05:23:36] you've got your clothes, you got your
[05:23:37] car, you got whatever else you spend and
[05:23:39] you think that's my fixed costs. Years
[05:23:41] ago I was sitting in the audience and I
[05:23:42] saw a man write a million on a
[05:23:45] whiteboard and he called someone from
[05:23:46] the audience. He said, "How much do you
[05:23:47] make per year?" And they said, " $50,000
[05:23:50] a year." And he said, "Would you like to
[05:23:51] make a million a year?" And the person
[05:23:53] said, "Yes." And then he put a minus
[05:23:54] sign and he said, "Did you know that
[05:23:56] it's costing you $950,000 per year to
[05:23:59] not know how to make a million dollar a
[05:24:01] year?" And it was such a light bulb
[05:24:03] moment for me that I realized that the
[05:24:06] cost of ignorance is the difference
[05:24:08] between what your goals are and what you
[05:24:10] have today. Because if you knew how to
[05:24:12] achieve your goals, the difference is
[05:24:15] the value of that education. And
[05:24:17] conversely, the difference is the cost
[05:24:20] of that debt of ignorance. And so the
[05:24:23] number one priority in my life has
[05:24:25] always been to pay down ignorance as
[05:24:27] fast as I possibly could using whatever
[05:24:29] currency I needed to. So if that was
[05:24:31] relational capital that means using my
[05:24:33] network or doing favors for people or
[05:24:35] paying money which is the least
[05:24:36] efficient way of doing it. I would try
[05:24:38] and find a way that I could pay down
[05:24:39] ignorance to achieve the things that I
[05:24:41] wanted so I could get the information so
[05:24:42] I could get the learning. When I started
[05:24:44] um I paid to get into rooms. I paid
[05:24:47] $25,000 $35,000. And you're like wait I
[05:24:49] don't have that right now. I get it.
[05:24:50] Well you pay $10,000 was the first thing
[05:24:52] I ever bought that was information
[05:24:53] based. That's what I was the first thing
[05:24:55] I ever invested. And how was I able to
[05:24:56] do that? Because I had saved for two
[05:24:58] years and I'd saved 50 grand up. And so
[05:25:00] for me, I was like, "Okay, this is the
[05:25:01] direction I'm going in. I'm going to
[05:25:03] invest in learning." And when I got in
[05:25:05] that room, the first room I was in was a
[05:25:07] gym owner room, and I didn't have a gym.
[05:25:09] And I paid to be in that room so I could
[05:25:11] start the gym the right way. When I paid
[05:25:12] to the $25,000 room, it was an internet
[05:25:14] marketing room. And guess what? I didn't
[05:25:16] have an internet marketing business, but
[05:25:18] I paid there so I could try and learn
[05:25:19] how to do it the right way rather than
[05:25:20] try and start it the wrong way and have
[05:25:21] to fix it. And so, I think a lot of
[05:25:23] people wait too long to try and learn. I
[05:25:25] always want to grab my future and pull
[05:25:27] it towards me. And so I was willing to
[05:25:29] spend as much money as I had available
[05:25:31] to me to make those bets because it was
[05:25:33] a bet on me and I knew I would never
[05:25:34] lose that. You can't lose you. You
[05:25:36] always have diamond hands on you. Like
[05:25:38] till the day you die, you've got you.
[05:25:40] And so the thing is about investing in
[05:25:42] education is that sometimes the lessons
[05:25:44] you learn aren't the lessons you expect
[05:25:46] to learn, but you learn them
[05:25:47] nonetheless. And so sometimes you go
[05:25:49] into an education thing and you don't
[05:25:50] get what you thought, but you still get
[05:25:51] something and it was still more than
[05:25:53] what you paid. And so when I went into
[05:25:54] those rooms, I'd already used up all my
[05:25:56] money to get in the room. So I was like,
[05:25:57] "Okay, what else do I have?" And so at
[05:25:59] the time I knew how to sell. And so I
[05:26:01] just went to every single person in the
[05:26:02] room and was like, "Can I help you sell
[05:26:04] stuff?" And so they'd be like, "Well,
[05:26:06] sure, my sales team sucks." Or, "Sure,
[05:26:08] my my script sucks." Or, "Sure, my offer
[05:26:10] sucks." Or, "I don't know how to
[05:26:11] overcome these objections." And so I
[05:26:12] would spend an hour, 2 hours, 3 hours on
[05:26:15] the phone with these people training
[05:26:16] their teams, writing scripts. And they
[05:26:18] were like, "Dude, thanks so much. This
[05:26:20] is way I can't believe you did all
[05:26:21] this." And the thing is is that if
[05:26:23] you're going to pay for help from
[05:26:25] someone, pay in full.
[05:26:28] Don't halfass a free gift. And so if
[05:26:32] you're good at something, you're good at
[05:26:34] a skill, you're an accountant, you don't
[05:26:36] do one page of someone's taxes. If
[05:26:38] you're going to do a favor, you do the
[05:26:40] whole thing. You treat them like they're
[05:26:42] a paying customer and then they will
[05:26:43] respond as though you have paid them.
[05:26:46] And so it will be like you've given them
[05:26:47] money and then you will get that
[05:26:48] reciprocity. And at the time when I did
[05:26:50] those favors for all those people, I
[05:26:52] didn't know what I was going to ask for.
[05:26:53] I just knew that I would need someone's
[05:26:55] help in the room. And I'd rather have
[05:26:57] more phone numbers I could call for help
[05:26:59] that owed me one than none. And when I
[05:27:02] wanted to make a webinar, I called one
[05:27:04] of the people who's good at webinars.
[05:27:05] When I wanted to run ads, I called the
[05:27:06] guy who's really good at running ads.
[05:27:08] When I wanted to uh figure out funnels
[05:27:10] and landing pages and stuff, I called
[05:27:12] the guy who was really good at funnels
[05:27:13] and landing pages, cuz each of those
[05:27:14] guys wasn't good at what I was good at.
[05:27:16] And so we're able to barter, which by
[05:27:18] the way, still to this day is the most
[05:27:20] efficient form of trade because Uncle
[05:27:21] Sam don't take any piece of it for us or
[05:27:25] them. Everybody wins. 11. There's two
[05:27:28] types of things that you can learn. And
[05:27:30] so if you're trying to pay down
[05:27:31] ignorance, you got to know what you're
[05:27:32] buying. So you can learn about
[05:27:35] something, something that exists that
[05:27:37] you didn't know existed. And then you
[05:27:39] can learn how to do something. And so
[05:27:41] one is called declarative knowledge,
[05:27:43] knowledge of existence. The other is
[05:27:45] called procedural knowledge which is
[05:27:46] knowing how to do it. And so if I
[05:27:48] explain to you that private equity
[05:27:49] exists and this is how you can buy,
[05:27:51] package and sell a business for a lot of
[05:27:53] money. Now you know about it which is a
[05:27:56] prerequisite for learning how to do it.
[05:27:58] And so when you buy into access to
[05:28:01] networks to people to relationships the
[05:28:03] primary thing that you're learning is
[05:28:05] learning about things that exist.
[05:28:07] They're going to tell you tax
[05:28:08] strategies, investment strategy,
[05:28:10] marketing strategy, sales strategies,
[05:28:12] business models that you haven't heard
[05:28:13] of. That is what you learn there. But if
[05:28:16] they tell you those things, you leave
[05:28:17] and you get excited. But then you're
[05:28:19] like, well, shoot, how do I do it? Which
[05:28:20] is the second thing that you learn how
[05:28:22] to do, which is the how part. And so
[05:28:24] when you're going into any kind of
[05:28:26] investment, whether you're investing
[05:28:28] time, you're investing trade, you're
[05:28:29] doing some work for someone so they do
[05:28:31] work for you back, or you're investing
[05:28:32] money, you better be sure what you're
[05:28:34] buying. And the interesting thing about
[05:28:37] those two types of knowledge is that the
[05:28:39] declarative knowledge tends to teach you
[05:28:41] things that you didn't know existed.
[05:28:44] It's the unknown unknowns. That is why
[05:28:46] some of these are the biggest
[05:28:47] breakthroughs. When you get into those
[05:28:48] rooms with someone making 10 or 100
[05:28:50] times more than you, they see the world
[05:28:51] in a different way. Whereas when you go
[05:28:53] for how to, it's more predictable what
[05:28:55] you're going to get because you're
[05:28:57] specifically trying to learn how the
[05:28:59] skill is. You know it exists and you
[05:29:00] just need to clarify the steps to
[05:29:01] getting there. And so just delineating
[05:29:03] what you're trying to learn will help
[05:29:05] you actually learn it. So the first time
[05:29:07] I learned declarative knowledge was that
[05:29:09] Facebook ads existed. That was in 2013.
[05:29:12] And so I learned how they how they
[05:29:14] worked and I learned just enough to make
[05:29:16] them work. So I learned declarative
[05:29:17] knowledge that they existed and I
[05:29:18] learned how to do them in one weekend.
[05:29:20] Super valuable. Now I was able to ride
[05:29:23] that skill set for a couple years until
[05:29:25] I was like you know what I need to learn
[05:29:27] how to do this at a bigger scale. I
[05:29:28] wanted to go national with started gym
[05:29:30] launch do the turnarounds. And so I was
[05:29:31] like, I need somebody cuz I had only run
[05:29:33] local ads, which by the way are much
[05:29:34] easier than national style ads. And so I
[05:29:37] tried to go all around asking people for
[05:29:38] help. And at this point, I had probably
[05:29:41] used up the relational capital that I
[05:29:42] had before. So I called a bunch of
[05:29:44] agencies. All of them said they were
[05:29:45] going to charge me too much money that I
[05:29:46] could afford. And then finally, I just
[05:29:48] asked one guy, "Hey, instead of your
[05:29:49] monthly rate of $5,000 a month, which I
[05:29:52] couldn't even come close to affording at
[05:29:53] the time, I was like, can I just pay you
[05:29:55] per hour?" Now, of course, he said, "I
[05:29:57] don't trade my time for money." except
[05:29:59] of course he works overtime and then he
[05:30:01] gets money later but sure anyways he
[05:30:03] doesn't trade time for money and I said
[05:30:04] it's America everything's got a price
[05:30:06] and he said you know what 750 an hour
[05:30:09] I'll do it and I was like done now mind
[05:30:12] you 750 an hour was still a ton of money
[05:30:13] for me and so I showed up like it was
[05:30:15] Harvard on steroids for these calls cuz
[05:30:17] I I would prep for the call I had my
[05:30:18] notes out I recorded it I was like I had
[05:30:21] two people in the room be like make sure
[05:30:22] I don't miss anything right and so I
[05:30:24] would go and I had him first document
[05:30:27] the process of what he did to run ads as
[05:30:31] though he were me. Then I had him
[05:30:33] demonstrate it. So he clicked the
[05:30:35] buttons so I could see what he was doing
[05:30:37] and I had him stop and explain to me
[05:30:38] each of the steps so I could put it into
[05:30:40] my little checklist too. And then
[05:30:41] finally I duplicated in front of him
[05:30:43] which means document demonstrate
[05:30:45] duplicate. I then did in front of him to
[05:30:47] make sure that I was doing it right. And
[05:30:49] so once I did it right and I did it
[05:30:50] right multiple times in a row and I
[05:30:52] didn't need him to to to correct me
[05:30:54] while I was doing it, that's when I had
[05:30:56] mastered the skill. It took me eight
[05:30:57] sessions. So, it took me eight hours and
[05:31:00] whatever that is times 750 in order to
[05:31:02] learn 12. A watch isn't going to replace
[05:31:05] work. A Rolex isn't going to replace
[05:31:08] reality. And so, what happens a lot of
[05:31:10] times when you're coming up is that you
[05:31:12] want to get status, right? You feel
[05:31:14] downtrodden. You feel like no one
[05:31:15] respects you. And that's normal as a
[05:31:17] young man. That's what you do. You don't
[05:31:18] have any status. That's what you come
[05:31:20] into the world as. And you got to go
[05:31:21] make it. And so the thing that you want
[05:31:24] to do early on is get status as fast as
[05:31:26] possible. The thing is is a lot of times
[05:31:28] you trade short-term status at the
[05:31:29] expense of long-term. And so as somebody
[05:31:31] who has lots of young men in my audience
[05:31:34] and middle-aged men in my audience,
[05:31:36] you'll never impress someone who's
[05:31:38] wealthier than you with assets.
[05:31:41] You'll only impress people below you. So
[05:31:44] you have the wrong target audience
[05:31:46] because to impress poor people, you
[05:31:48] outspend them. to impress rich people,
[05:31:50] you outwork them. And once I understood
[05:31:53] this, I was like, "Oh, the guys who are
[05:31:55] at the top of the game give me respect
[05:31:58] because they know I'm a future one of
[05:32:00] them because they know when they were my
[05:32:02] age, they double down on the hustle, not
[05:32:04] the highlight reel." And that
[05:32:06] overspending on status happens at every
[05:32:08] level. So, in the beginning, it's a
[05:32:10] watch, right? And a little bit later, it
[05:32:12] might be a car payment. And a little bit
[05:32:14] later, it might be a really big
[05:32:16] expensive car payment. And then it might
[05:32:18] be a really big condo and then it might
[05:32:19] be a really nice house and then it might
[05:32:22] become a yacht and then becomes a jet.
[05:32:23] And the thing is is that you add zeros
[05:32:25] to it but again you only impress the
[05:32:27] people underneath of you not the people
[05:32:29] above you. And if you want to impress
[05:32:30] the people underneath of you by all
[05:32:32] means do it. But know that that's what
[05:32:35] you're about. Buy time like a rich
[05:32:37] person. Buy stuff like a poor person.
[05:32:40] And so when you're thinking about time
[05:32:44] being the most valuable thing, if you've
[05:32:46] already dedicated yourself to working
[05:32:47] and earning an income and learning the
[05:32:49] skills, then you just want to pour as
[05:32:52] much time into that as you can. And so
[05:32:53] fundamentally, you're buying your time
[05:32:55] back, your lowcost time or low income
[05:32:58] time. So it's prepping food, going
[05:33:01] grocery shopping, cleaning your house,
[05:33:04] whatever else you do with more income
[05:33:07] earning time. I remember the first time
[05:33:09] I closed a $500 sale at my gym. I
[05:33:12] realized that that sale took me 30
[05:33:13] minutes. And I knew that for me to buy
[05:33:16] groceries for the whole month four times
[05:33:18] would take me $500 and far more than 30
[05:33:22] minutes. And so I thought to myself, my
[05:33:24] god, if all of that time I was grocery
[05:33:26] shopping and and food prepping and and
[05:33:28] and and cleaning up after myself and
[05:33:30] then doing laundry, if all of that time
[05:33:33] I could just sell more in a couple
[05:33:35] hours, I could do all of that stuff for
[05:33:37] free. And my poor mind was like, "Hey,
[05:33:39] that's wasteful. You could be doing that
[05:33:41] stuff on your own." But you buy time
[05:33:43] like you're rich. You spend money on
[05:33:46] stuff like you're poor. So buy time, not
[05:33:48] stuff. Because when you buy time, you
[05:33:50] can replace the money you bought it with
[05:33:52] and some. Let me put some real numbers
[05:33:54] to this. So the average American spends
[05:33:57] $1,500 a month on 96 hours of work. And
[05:34:03] that breaks down roughly to cleaning
[05:34:05] their house, cleaning their clothes,
[05:34:09] buying food, preparing food, and
[05:34:12] cleaning food. I'm not even going to get
[05:34:14] into the 4 hours a day that the average
[05:34:16] person spends on social media and
[05:34:18] watching television. You're going to
[05:34:19] keep doing that, so I'm not even going
[05:34:20] to try to convince you not to. But if
[05:34:22] you just replace those things that you
[05:34:23] probably don't want to do, it costs
[05:34:25] about $1,500 per month. And so as long
[05:34:27] as you make more than $15 per hour,
[05:34:30] because it cost about 96 hours to
[05:34:32] replace those activities, which means if
[05:34:33] I can replace 96 hours of work for
[05:34:35] $1,500, and it's also 96 hours of
[05:34:38] draining work. Like it expends energy.
[05:34:41] It's not like you just sit there for 96
[05:34:42] hours, you're actually getting actively
[05:34:44] tired from doing that stuff. If you took
[05:34:47] that same thing and if you make more
[05:34:48] than $15 per hour in your active job, it
[05:34:51] makes sense. It's the logical decision
[05:34:53] for you to buy that and then go make
[05:34:56] more because you're also going to make
[05:34:57] money twice. Not only are you going to
[05:35:00] save the time and then work and make
[05:35:02] more, but you also get better at your
[05:35:05] job because all of those extra hours
[05:35:07] aren't just making you more money.
[05:35:09] You're also becoming more skilled. So,
[05:35:10] you get better faster. And so if I have
[05:35:13] a year-long guy where he spends $1,500 a
[05:35:16] month to replace all of those things at
[05:35:18] the end of that year, not only does he
[05:35:20] have more money at the end end of the
[05:35:21] year, but because he had an extra 100
[05:35:23] hours of high energy time that he didn't
[05:35:26] have to spend per month, he's getting
[05:35:29] 50% better per year. And so that assumes
[05:35:32] that he doesn't get rewarded in his work
[05:35:34] for getting better, which by the way, in
[05:35:36] reality, you typically do as long as you
[05:35:39] ask. who you compare yourself to, not
[05:35:41] who you spend your most time with, will
[05:35:43] be the highest predictor of how much you
[05:35:45] make. And so we are motivated by the
[05:35:47] things that we lack. And so if you're
[05:35:49] very hungry, it's because you lack food.
[05:35:51] If you lack sleep, you're very tired.
[05:35:53] You're very motivated to sleep. And so
[05:35:55] if you want to be motivated to make
[05:35:57] money, it's not enough to not have
[05:35:58] money. You have to have a desire to make
[05:36:02] a lot more money. And the strongest way
[05:36:04] to create that desire is to visually see
[05:36:08] the people who are making far more than
[05:36:09] you. And so it's about who you compare
[05:36:12] yourself to, not who you spend time
[05:36:13] with. Fundamentally, the richest man in
[05:36:15] the world only spends time with people
[05:36:17] poorer than him. But he continues to get
[05:36:18] richer because he's comparing himself to
[05:36:20] the future version of himself. That's
[05:36:22] his reference point. That's his
[05:36:23] reference group. And when you start out,
[05:36:25] there's real people. As you evolve, it
[05:36:27] becomes imaginary. I heard this quote
[05:36:29] from one person to another when I was
[05:36:31] walking through the street and he was
[05:36:32] talking about buying something that was
[05:36:36] a no a no return investment. Let's call
[05:36:38] it a big toy. And he said there will
[05:36:41] always be time to make money later. And
[05:36:44] I remember hearing that and thinking
[05:36:47] that's what someone who's poor says.
[05:36:52] And so to be clear, I think if you want
[05:36:54] to enjoy life, by all means do it. This
[05:36:57] video is about making more money. That's
[05:36:59] the stated objective. And so that's what
[05:37:01] I'm talking about. And so the idea that
[05:37:04] you're going to spend now, work later is
[05:37:07] the fundamental crux of poverty.
[05:37:10] And so you have to break that with all
[05:37:12] your heart. And when you have those
[05:37:15] people around you, and this was a toy,
[05:37:16] but it could be let's go out, we it
[05:37:18] always comes under the guise of yolo. We
[05:37:21] have to live life. But everyone who says
[05:37:23] that assumes that getting better and
[05:37:26] learning is not life
[05:37:29] and is not living. And for me, the
[05:37:33] purpose of my life is to learn as much
[05:37:35] as I can and pay down ignorance as much
[05:37:37] as I possibly can and squeeze the last
[05:37:39] drop of potential out of me that I can.
[05:37:41] And the way that I do that is through
[05:37:43] learning. And so for every person that
[05:37:45] asks you to sacrifice working now so
[05:37:48] that you can have fun now, just make
[05:37:50] sure you know the trade you're making.
[05:37:52] I'll be real with you. There's no
[05:37:53] perfect way to live your 20s or even
[05:37:56] your 30s. You either end up an
[05:37:58] underkilled 30-year-old or 40-year-old
[05:38:02] or an underlived 30-year-old or
[05:38:05] 40-year-old. And so, fundamentally, it's
[05:38:08] not either or, but knowing the trade-off
[05:38:11] and living with the consequences because
[05:38:12] you can't do them over. And on a
[05:38:15] personal note, I sacrificed or said
[05:38:17] differently, invested my 20s in order to
[05:38:20] have lots of skills and underlived.
[05:38:24] But in that same time period, I built to
[05:38:28] where I am now. And I genuinely am very
[05:38:31] happy with where I am now in life. And I
[05:38:34] would not redo those years to have quote
[05:38:36] lived more because the real secret is as
[05:38:39] I was doing it, I loved the game. And so
[05:38:42] some of the best moments of my life when
[05:38:44] I look back were some of the moments
[05:38:46] that I felt like I was struggling the
[05:38:47] most because it was when I underwent the
[05:38:49] most growth. And so it's interesting
[05:38:51] because the pain that you go through in
[05:38:52] the moment often becomes the purpose
[05:38:54] that you look back on in your life. And
[05:38:56] so the idea that we want to avoid pain
[05:38:58] so that we can live today I think
[05:39:00] conflates reality because when you look
[05:39:01] back on your life a lot of times those
[05:39:03] are the things that define you. And so
[05:39:04] we should be seeking those out not
[05:39:06] running away from them. So if you're not
[05:39:07] sure who you compare yourself to versus
[05:39:10] who you spend time with when you're
[05:39:12] about to make a big decision, the people
[05:39:14] who come up in your mind who you're
[05:39:16] weighing their opinions on your
[05:39:18] decision, those are your reference group
[05:39:20] people. The people whose opinion you
[05:39:22] care about. And so if all your friends,
[05:39:24] for example, are billionaires and they
[05:39:27] all sacrificed their 20s, got rid of
[05:39:29] their friends, got rid of their material
[05:39:30] belonging, spent all their time working
[05:39:31] for free so that they could learn this
[05:39:33] big skill set and then doubled down in
[05:39:35] their late 20s and then made it big by
[05:39:36] the time they were in their 30s and 40s.
[05:39:39] Those people, if that was your reference
[05:39:41] group, if you're thinking about leaving
[05:39:43] home, what do you think that reference
[05:39:44] group's going to say? For sure. And
[05:39:46] because of that, you're out the door.
[05:39:48] And so whenever you have these
[05:39:50] frictional moments where you are like, I
[05:39:51] think I should do this, but whoever that
[05:39:54] person is, whoever that voice is, if
[05:39:56] they don't have what you want, don't
[05:39:58] listen to what they say. Only listen to
[05:40:00] other people's opinions about your life
[05:40:02] if their dreams for you are bigger than
[05:40:04] yours. If they're not, disregard.
[05:40:07] Invest, then spend the rest. So the idea
[05:40:10] is that you invest first and then spend
[05:40:13] what's left over. And so an interesting
[05:40:14] thing is that Switzerland has the
[05:40:16] highest per capita millionaires in the
[05:40:18] world without having the highest GDP or
[05:40:21] even GDP per capita. And so how are they
[05:40:23] able to do that? That means that they
[05:40:24] have different rules around money, which
[05:40:26] is what this video is about. And so if
[05:40:28] we adopt those rules, we can get those
[05:40:31] outcomes, which means these are just
[05:40:32] decisions that we get to make. And the
[05:40:34] easiest way to do that is you take what
[05:40:36] you need off the top and then you spend
[05:40:38] the rest on what you want. And so it
[05:40:41] comes down to saying that you need your
[05:40:43] future. You need your future self to be
[05:40:45] bigger than your current self today. And
[05:40:47] so you invest first and then you spend
[05:40:50] the rest. And so the way that I like to
[05:40:53] think about this is point 16. This is
[05:40:55] how we operationalize this, which is
[05:40:57] automate investing and then create
[05:40:59] friction around spending. And so you
[05:41:02] want to take the money off before you
[05:41:04] see it. If your job, for example, has a
[05:41:06] way that they can automatically skim off
[05:41:07] your paycheck and put it into some sort
[05:41:09] of investment stuff, do it. If they
[05:41:11] don't have that, have one of these apps
[05:41:13] that does segmentation or has multiple
[05:41:16] bank accounts that you can say, "This
[05:41:17] automatically goes here. This
[05:41:19] automatically goes here, and I don't
[05:41:20] touch this." And if you want to get real
[05:41:23] crazy, the advanced version of this is
[05:41:25] that as you make more money, you keep
[05:41:27] what you're living the spend the rest
[05:41:30] part, instead of making it a percentage,
[05:41:32] make it a fixed amount. And then as you
[05:41:34] make more, you're just investing more
[05:41:36] and more and more into the future. Now,
[05:41:39] you're like, "Well, how do I invest in
[05:41:40] the future if I'm just starting out?"
[05:41:41] The future is you. But you're making
[05:41:44] sure that when you're investing that
[05:41:45] money, you know, whether you're buying
[05:41:46] declarative knowledge or you're buying
[05:41:48] procedural knowledge, you're learning
[05:41:50] about stuff that you need to learn or
[05:41:51] you're learning how to do it. And the
[05:41:53] longer you do this, the easier it gets.
[05:41:56] For the record, I have zero
[05:41:57] Lamborghinis, zero Rolexes, zero jets,
[05:42:02] while also being able to buy multiple of
[05:42:04] these every single month. And so, the
[05:42:08] idea is you start to become addicted to
[05:42:12] getting good. And once you get that
[05:42:14] first little reward of seeing an
[05:42:16] investment that you made in yourself
[05:42:18] start paying off, you see your income go
[05:42:19] up, you start making more money, you're
[05:42:21] like, "Oh my god, this game is awesome."
[05:42:23] And so that flow of investment that
[05:42:26] comes to you is one of the best games
[05:42:29] that you want to win for yourself. You
[05:42:31] want to just keep seeing keep making
[05:42:33] cash flow PRs. Keep making that
[05:42:35] investment account PR and hit records in
[05:42:37] that account. And if you get addicted to
[05:42:39] that game, if you can just do that from
[05:42:41] everything in this video, you've already
[05:42:43] won. And so you want to automate
[05:42:45] deposits and manualize withdrawals. So
[05:42:49] everything that is automatic in terms
[05:42:51] like your rent, you want to write it as
[05:42:53] a check. If you or drop it off as cash,
[05:42:56] if you have payments that you make like
[05:42:58] a car payment, as much as you're like,
[05:43:00] "Wait, this is going to cost time." The
[05:43:02] value that you get back for knowing
[05:43:03] exactly where you spend your money is
[05:43:06] going to make you more money than the
[05:43:07] one hour a month that you have to pay
[05:43:09] your bills. That is a promise. And so
[05:43:12] that may also mean if you make it
[05:43:14] difficult to buy, well then maybe you
[05:43:16] delete some of the apps on your phone,
[05:43:19] maybe you don't save your credit cards
[05:43:20] on the sites that you tend to spend
[05:43:22] money on. You want to make it as hard as
[05:43:24] you can to spend money and make it as
[05:43:26] easy as possible to stack it. Number 17,
[05:43:30] it's easier to make a million than it is
[05:43:33] to make $100,000. And let me explain. If
[05:43:36] I told you to go down the block, you
[05:43:38] would go at a certain speed. If I said
[05:43:41] go as fast as you possibly can, at some
[05:43:43] point you'd run and then you'd improve
[05:43:45] your form and you get better footwear
[05:43:46] and then you'd change your clothes, but
[05:43:48] at some point you wouldn't be able to
[05:43:49] run any harder or any faster to get
[05:43:51] there. But if I said, "I need you to go
[05:43:53] five blocks." You might be like, "Huh,
[05:43:56] okay." Now, some people will then try to
[05:43:58] walk or run that, but the smart cookie
[05:44:02] then says, "Huh, I could take a car and
[05:44:05] I would go a hell of a lot faster." And
[05:44:08] if I'm speeding in my car, I'll probably
[05:44:10] get to the fifth block before the other
[05:44:12] guy gets to the end of the first block.
[05:44:14] And so the magic of thinking bigger is
[05:44:17] that you change your solution set.
[05:44:20] Meaning you use different tools to
[05:44:23] accomplish the objective. The reason
[05:44:25] $100,000 per year is the hardest amount
[05:44:26] of money to make is because it assumes
[05:44:29] for most people that they will trade
[05:44:31] their time in terms of hourly wages or
[05:44:33] salary in traditional work in order to
[05:44:35] get it. And so they have to spend all of
[05:44:37] their time in order to make the
[05:44:38] $100,000.
[05:44:39] But if I said make a million or even 10
[05:44:42] million before the world explodes, you
[05:44:44] would know that you would have to use a
[05:44:46] different way of solving that problem.
[05:44:48] And so the reason it's easier to make a
[05:44:51] million or $10 million is because you
[05:44:54] can do it in less time with more skill
[05:44:58] if you start solving for the skills
[05:45:01] required to make a million or $10
[05:45:03] million. You don't want to love money.
[05:45:06] You want to learn to love making money.
[05:45:08] So there's two misconceptions and then
[05:45:10] one truth around this. The first
[05:45:12] misconception is money is the root of
[05:45:14] all evil. And then that obviously is a
[05:45:17] quote from the Bible, 1 Timothy 6:10.
[05:45:20] The 2011 version, someone says, "No,
[05:45:22] it's not money that's the root of all
[05:45:24] evil. It's the love of money that's the
[05:45:26] root of all evil." But that's just the
[05:45:28] 2011 version. The actual translation,
[05:45:32] there's five translations for it. And
[05:45:34] four of the five are the love of money
[05:45:38] is the root of all kinds of evil.
[05:45:41] Meaning, if you desire money more than
[05:45:45] anything else, then you will commit the
[05:45:47] other sins in order to attain it. And so
[05:45:50] the idea is that it's only a pathway
[05:45:53] that has a high likelihood of causing
[05:45:56] you to do things that are unethical or
[05:45:58] immoral. And so there's this huge
[05:46:02] terrible paradigm in society that money
[05:46:04] is somehow good or bad. It is just
[05:46:07] potential energy. It's just bottled
[05:46:09] time. And that bottled time can build
[05:46:12] bombs. That bottled time can build
[05:46:14] hospitals. It can build wells. It can
[05:46:16] build schools. It can make YouTube
[05:46:17] videos that educate. And so the idea
[05:46:20] that you're afraid to make money means
[05:46:23] that you're afraid of having power. And
[05:46:26] maybe you should be afraid of having
[05:46:27] power because maybe you'd misuse it. But
[05:46:30] if you do want to help the world, then
[05:46:32] all it's going to do is amplify your
[05:46:34] ability to do that. And if you have that
[05:46:36] mission on your heart or in your mind,
[05:46:40] then it's your duty to remove everything
[05:46:43] else in your [ __ ] way to go get it.
[05:46:46] The more money you make other people,
[05:46:48] the more money you make. And so the
[05:46:50] amount of money that you will be able to
[05:46:51] make in your career comes down to three
[05:46:53] variables. Number one is the value that
[05:46:55] you're able to create in total for all
[05:46:58] of the people you create it for. Times
[05:47:01] your ability to negotiate how much of
[05:47:03] that value you're able to get. Times
[05:47:06] number three, which is the amount of
[05:47:09] other people who can also create that
[05:47:11] value. And you have to have all three
[05:47:14] because for example, if you develop a
[05:47:16] skill of sales and you can create
[05:47:18] millions of dollars in value for a
[05:47:20] company and you're really good at
[05:47:22] negotiating, then in theory you'd get
[05:47:24] millions and millions of dollars from
[05:47:26] that company. But if somebody else is
[05:47:28] willing to work for a few hundred,000 a
[05:47:30] year in order to make that value, then
[05:47:33] your position disappears. And so that
[05:47:35] gives us the blueprint for making money
[05:47:37] is that not only do you want to be able
[05:47:39] to create that value, you want to be
[05:47:41] able to create a value in a way that no
[05:47:43] one else can. And the way that you do
[05:47:45] that is not by, in my opinion, learning
[05:47:49] some incredibly secret unique skill.
[05:47:51] What makes skills unique is the skill
[05:47:54] set. It's the stack of skills together
[05:47:57] that create the uniqueness. If someone
[05:48:00] else has to try and recreate something I
[05:48:02] could do, they would have to have lived
[05:48:04] my life. And so your life and the time
[05:48:08] you spend becomes your competitive
[05:48:10] advantage. It becomes your asset. It
[05:48:12] becomes the moat that other people can't
[05:48:14] chip into. They'd have to go through
[05:48:16] being a competitive fitness person and
[05:48:18] then go through owning lots of gyms and
[05:48:20] then go through doing turnarounds across
[05:48:23] the country and then go through doing a
[05:48:24] licensing business and then go through
[05:48:26] making a supplement business and then go
[05:48:28] through launching a meal prep business
[05:48:30] and then also starting a software
[05:48:31] company and then going through an exit
[05:48:33] for both and then starting a private
[05:48:35] equity. They'd have to do so much stuff.
[05:48:37] There are so many skills that are
[05:48:39] required. Your time is your weapon if
[05:48:43] you invest it wisely. And the one thing
[05:48:45] that I would leave you with is that
[05:48:47] money loves speed.
[05:48:49] Wealth loves time. Poverty loves
[05:48:52] indecision. I spend more time than I
[05:48:54] deserve with billionaires and
[05:48:56] multi-billionaires. And something I
[05:48:58] noticed is that all of them share
[05:49:00] similar behavior patterns. And there's
[05:49:02] 11 that I found. And the best part is
[05:49:04] you can steal just about every single
[05:49:06] one of them. Enjoy. I crossed $100
[05:49:07] million in net worth [music] at age 31.
[05:49:09] I'm 35, significantly higher than that
[05:49:11] now. And I have the privilege of talking
[05:49:14] to lots of people who are at billion
[05:49:15] dollar plus. And [music] so in this
[05:49:16] video, I want to break down a handful of
[05:49:18] themes that I've seen repeated that can
[05:49:20] make you significantly more successful.
[05:49:22] The rich [music] by time, the poor by
[05:49:24] stuff, ambitious people by skills, and
[05:49:27] lazy people by distractions. As much as
[05:49:30] these seem like four different [music]
[05:49:31] groups, it's really like you have these
[05:49:33] pairings. Rich people use money to buy
[05:49:36] time. [music] Ambitious people use time
[05:49:39] to buy skills. And the reason it's
[05:49:40] ambitious people is because generational
[05:49:42] wealth isn't transferred through assets.
[05:49:45] It's not transferred through stuff. It's
[05:49:47] transferred through education. [music]
[05:49:48] It's transferred through skills. And so
[05:49:50] there's this Sanskrit proverb that I
[05:49:52] love. If you have a good son, you don't
[05:49:54] need to accumulate wealth. If you have a
[05:49:56] bad son, there's no point in
[05:49:58] accumulating [music] wealth. And so the
[05:49:59] idea that you're going to pass on your
[05:50:01] wealth to a child who doesn't have the
[05:50:04] skills makes it irrelevant because
[05:50:06] fundamentally either it is a good son
[05:50:08] who has skills and then if the son has
[05:50:10] skills then whether you transfer the
[05:50:12] wealth or not makes the wealth itself
[05:50:14] irrelevant. And I find that there's so
[05:50:16] many things that are like this in wealth
[05:50:17] creation that you don't understand until
[05:50:19] you're on the other side of it because
[05:50:20] the answers that you're looking for are
[05:50:22] not in your newsfeed. They are not in
[05:50:24] the distraction. And so the vast
[05:50:26] majority of lazy people that I have
[05:50:28] encountered continue to distract
[05:50:30] themselves because the difficulty of
[05:50:33] looking at themselves in the mirror and
[05:50:35] saying I am inadequate is too painful.
[05:50:37] And so instead they would rather watch
[05:50:39] fluff videos on the internet that make
[05:50:42] them feel good and tickle their ears
[05:50:44] rather than confront reality that they
[05:50:47] are just not good enough. And so they
[05:50:48] consume the stuff that's like I am
[05:50:50] worthy. I deserve these things. In other
[05:50:53] words, entitled to them, which by the
[05:50:55] way, if you feel entitled to something,
[05:50:57] then when you get it, you are never
[05:50:58] grateful because you thought you
[05:50:59] deserved it to begin with. We know that
[05:51:01] gratitude, for example, is something
[05:51:02] that increases your subjective
[05:51:04] well-being in life, which is that you
[05:51:05] enjoy life more when you are grateful
[05:51:07] for what you get. Which means that you
[05:51:08] have to, by very definition, expect
[05:51:11] nothing, which means you're entitled to
[05:51:13] nothing, which means that you deserve
[05:51:15] nothing. In reality, you are worthy only
[05:51:17] of the things that you currently have
[05:51:19] because you have already gotten them.
[05:51:20] You have proven that you can work a
[05:51:22] minimum wage job, so you are worthy of
[05:51:24] the compensation of minimum wage. And as
[05:51:26] much as this is painful, and I'm sure
[05:51:27] this will get clipped a hundred times to
[05:51:29] show me as some evil rich guy, I'm
[05:51:30] willing to take that hate for the few
[05:51:32] people who will hear this message, and
[05:51:34] decide to change the way they act. You
[05:51:36] can be ambitious and distracted, which
[05:51:39] keeps you poor. When I started out at my
[05:51:41] peak, I had nine businesses because I
[05:51:44] heard seven income streams make you
[05:51:46] wealthy, but it doesn't. Seven income
[05:51:48] streams just spread you seven ways. And
[05:51:50] I had nine. I was like, "Well, seven
[05:51:51] good. Nine must be better." To give you
[05:51:53] context, I had a chiropractor agency. I
[05:51:55] had a dental agency. I had a gym
[05:51:56] turnaround business. And then I had at
[05:51:58] the time six location. So there's nine.
[05:52:00] Where it is? Boom. And I had partners in
[05:52:02] each of these businesses. I was still
[05:52:04] the one who was required to rain,
[05:52:07] meaning I was the one who was required
[05:52:08] to sell customers into all nine. If you
[05:52:10] are required to work inside of the
[05:52:12] business, then you can only really do
[05:52:14] one job. And so when people hear that
[05:52:16] someone has seven income streams, it's
[05:52:18] because they own assets that generate
[05:52:19] that kind of income. But in order to
[05:52:21] gain the cash to then buy the assets
[05:52:24] that create the cash flow, it requires
[05:52:26] time and focus. Let me make focus real
[05:52:28] for you. Focus is a very amorphous term.
[05:52:30] Focus is measured by the amount of
[05:52:32] things you say no to. And inversely, you
[05:52:35] could measure it by how few things you
[05:52:37] say yes to. meaning the most focused
[05:52:40] person says only yes to one thing and
[05:52:42] says no to literally everything else.
[05:52:44] And so the next thing that separates the
[05:52:46] rich from the poor is it's 100x not 2x.
[05:52:50] And so this concept is one that I had
[05:52:53] dinner with a friend of mine who's a
[05:52:54] public CEO and I asked him what he had
[05:52:57] done to grow the business. I think from
[05:52:58] a $200 million market cap to a $1.2
[05:53:01] billion market cap in less than 2
[05:53:02] [music] years. All right. So that's
[05:53:04] absurd growth for a company. And I was
[05:53:06] like, "So, you know, what what are you
[05:53:07] doing primarily?" And he said, "I'm
[05:53:09] shaking hands. I'm kissing babies. I'm
[05:53:10] going to events all the time." And I was
[05:53:12] like, "Well, how many?" He's like,
[05:53:13] "Well, I'm going to do uh 66 events this
[05:53:15] quarter." And I was like, "In person."
[05:53:17] He was like, "Yeah." I was like, "Are
[05:53:18] they coming to you?" And he's like, "No,
[05:53:19] I'm going to them." I want to make this
[05:53:21] real. He has a wife. He has kids. And
[05:53:24] before anyone listens and says, I can't
[05:53:26] believe he Well, cool. He makes trades.
[05:53:28] If anything, I would hope that people
[05:53:30] watch this and say, "I wouldn't make
[05:53:32] that trade." In which case, great. Also,
[05:53:34] don't complain about not having what
[05:53:35] somebody who has made that trade made.
[05:53:37] And so, one of the big misconceptions,
[05:53:39] by the way, this is a sales thing, too,
[05:53:40] is that people want your outcome their
[05:53:43] way. They want to have their cake and
[05:53:44] eat it, too. They want to say, "Hey, I
[05:53:46] want to not change the way I'm eating. I
[05:53:48] want to not change the way I'm living,
[05:53:49] but I want to have a six-pack, and I
[05:53:50] want to be in shape. I want to continue
[05:53:51] to live this way, and I want to get the
[05:53:53] 10 chick or the 10 guy. I want to
[05:53:55] continue with my work life schedule as I
[05:53:58] currently have, but I want to have
[05:53:59] hyperrowth." They are trades. They're
[05:54:01] price tags. When you go to the store,
[05:54:02] you either want the shoes and you're
[05:54:04] willing to pay the price or you're not
[05:54:05] willing to pay the price. That's it. You
[05:54:06] can't pick the price for the shoes. You
[05:54:09] pay it or you don't. My telephone back
[05:54:10] to myself is that I thought I worked a
[05:54:14] lot when I was younger. And I did spend
[05:54:17] a lot of time working, but I made so
[05:54:21] little progress because a lot of that
[05:54:23] time I wasn't actually creating output.
[05:54:26] I encourage people to do something
[05:54:28] called the 12x30. All right? It's It's
[05:54:30] very simple and it's actually not as
[05:54:31] unsustainable as people would think. You
[05:54:33] work 12 hours a day for 30 days
[05:54:34] straight, no weekends. By the last day,
[05:54:36] you realize one, you aren't made of
[05:54:38] glass. Two, how much more you could be
[05:54:41] working, [music] three, how much faster
[05:54:44] you could be achieving your goals. Four,
[05:54:46] how much you could be getting better
[05:54:48] every single day. Five, [music] you
[05:54:50] don't need to work like this forever.
[05:54:52] But if you need to do it for a season or
[05:54:53] for a reason sometime in the future,
[05:54:56] you've got that gear in you. And six,
[05:54:58] there are people who are working more
[05:55:00] than you who are beating you. And you
[05:55:02] get all of those lessons for the low
[05:55:04] price of getting more done in a month
[05:55:05] than you probably did last quarter. And
[05:55:06] so everyone and like of course you've
[05:55:08] got one, you know, one side of people
[05:55:09] who are like, I work more than this now.
[05:55:11] And of course they don't. They obviously
[05:55:12] don't. And the thing is is that people
[05:55:14] are like, well, I work like that, but I
[05:55:15] take a couple days off. Right? That's
[05:55:16] the point is that you have to push
[05:55:18] through it. Now, can you work 16 by 30?
[05:55:20] Sure. If you want to, you're welcome to
[05:55:22] work more than that because I've found
[05:55:23] that working six to six is kind of like
[05:55:24] what I do every day anyways. I'm on 12
[05:55:26] by 100, you know, in terms of how I
[05:55:28] think about working. And there's plenty
[05:55:29] of days that I work 15, 16 hour days cuz
[05:55:31] I get here at 5 or 6 and then sometimes
[05:55:33] we have an event, there's a dinner,
[05:55:34] things like that afterwards and ends at
[05:55:36] 9. And that's where you have to be on,
[05:55:37] not just at the office, not just in
[05:55:38] front of your computer, but people
[05:55:40] actually demanding things of you on a
[05:55:41] regular basis all the time being on
[05:55:43] camera. And I'll tell you that there are
[05:55:44] levels to this. It's like working alone
[05:55:46] for a full day is not as exhausting as
[05:55:49] being on stage for a full day, being on
[05:55:51] camera for a full day because every
[05:55:53] second that you are not peak, you are
[05:55:56] losing. You can take a break while
[05:55:58] you're working alone. You can't take a
[05:55:59] break when you're on stage, when you're
[05:56:01] meeting customers, when you're making
[05:56:02] content like right like every m minute
[05:56:05] that is not recorded is basically a
[05:56:06] minute wasted. There's a whole team here
[05:56:08] behind this camera, right? That is
[05:56:10] making this stuff for you and I'm
[05:56:11] costing them every second I'm not
[05:56:13] showing up. I remember there was a
[05:56:14] period a season of my life where I think
[05:56:16] I had like nine straight uh months of
[05:56:18] this and it was not 12 it was 15 16
[05:56:21] because I had to wake up at 4 to get to
[05:56:24] the gym where I was at the gym but I
[05:56:26] wake up at 4 and then I would get the
[05:56:27] the class ready. I'd open the gym doors
[05:56:29] at 4:30 start the classes at 5:00 and
[05:56:32] the last class at night would end. It
[05:56:34] would be a 7:00 class. It would end at
[05:56:35] 8:00 and then at 8 I would then do
[05:56:37] billing. I'd reach out to old customers.
[05:56:39] I would confirm lead appointments for
[05:56:40] the next day. all that sometimes until
[05:56:42] 10, 11 at night and then I'd wake up
[05:56:44] again at 4:00. And so I don't know what
[05:56:45] the hours are there, but it's more than
[05:56:47] 12. And I did that for 9 months
[05:56:48] straight. And I used to describe it as
[05:56:50] the kind of tired a good night's sleep
[05:56:52] couldn't fix. It was like it was tired.
[05:56:53] It was deeper than like a one sleep. I
[05:56:56] needed like weeks to like basically come
[05:56:58] back to normal. And the thing is is that
[05:57:01] I think it is valuable because you have
[05:57:03] to learn that you have that gear. I
[05:57:05] think that that gives you supreme
[05:57:06] confidence when you're entering any new
[05:57:08] endeavor because you know that you have
[05:57:11] acquired the trait of being relentless
[05:57:13] that you do not relent. You do not let
[05:57:14] up. You do not stop until you get what
[05:57:16] you want. And you know that you can push
[05:57:18] through being tired or being underslept
[05:57:20] or being overwhelmed because you realize
[05:57:22] that you didn't die and that you've done
[05:57:24] this before. And so the difference
[05:57:25] between the newbie and the veteran is
[05:57:27] that the veteran looks on something and
[05:57:28] looks back on what they have done to get
[05:57:31] to that point and says, "I've seen this
[05:57:32] before. This is another one of those."
[05:57:34] And that's why they don't have the
[05:57:35] anxiety. That's why they don't have the
[05:57:37] stress. That's so when they get on
[05:57:38] stage, they crush it. That's when they
[05:57:39] the high pressure situation, they still
[05:57:40] breathe normally. Their heartbeat
[05:57:42] doesn't go up because they have done it
[05:57:43] before. And the only way that you can
[05:57:44] get to the point where you can say
[05:57:45] you've done it before is to do it now.
[05:57:47] And so I define work as volume times
[05:57:51] leverage. [music] And so it's about how
[05:57:52] many times you do something and how much
[05:57:54] you get for each time you do it. In the
[05:57:56] beginning, you need to do a lot more of
[05:57:58] this, right? You do way more volume
[05:58:00] because of that volume. you gain skill
[05:58:02] and then the leverage also increases and
[05:58:04] so you get 100x the volume which then
[05:58:07] over time builds skill which then gives
[05:58:09] you more for what you put in and then
[05:58:11] over time that continues to increase
[05:58:14] your output. The thing is this concept
[05:58:16] of 100x not 2x has applied to so many
[05:58:19] different areas of my life. Like when I
[05:58:20] paid a large brand for insight into how
[05:58:23] I could grow my personal brand when I
[05:58:24] decided to get into this game I was like
[05:58:26] hey I'm not growing that fast. Uh, and
[05:58:28] he said, "Oh, well, pull up your social
[05:58:30] media profiles." And we pulled them up
[05:58:31] one by one and he said, "Look at what
[05:58:32] you're doing. Look what I'm doing." And
[05:58:33] he had genuinely been doing 10 times
[05:58:35] more volume than I was doing. And so he
[05:58:37] basically said, "You're not doing enough
[05:58:39] volume." I then said, "Okay, that was
[05:58:41] clear as day. I need to do more volume."
[05:58:42] And the thing is is when we did more
[05:58:44] volume, we got better at doing it. And
[05:58:46] so now we continue to do the same volume
[05:58:47] as I did in the beginning, which is 10
[05:58:49] times more than when I started. We get
[05:58:50] even more output. And then I had a
[05:58:51] different friend who talked to me,
[05:58:52] billionaire guy. He was thinking about
[05:58:54] getting into content. And he said, "Hey,
[05:58:55] I'm really not growing that fast." And I
[05:58:56] had got to have the exact same
[05:58:58] conversation with him. But the thing is
[05:58:59] is that this guy had done 100x not 2x
[05:59:01] before in his life. It was just that he
[05:59:02] got to realize like me that it has been
[05:59:05] 100% domain specific. And so when he
[05:59:07] then I showed him my Instagram and his I
[05:59:09] showed him my Tik Tok and his I showed
[05:59:11] him my YouTube and his and I said,
[05:59:12] "Dude, I'm making 450 pieces a week.
[05:59:14] You're making seven." And he was like,
[05:59:15] "Got it." Like understood. He
[05:59:16] immediately got it because he had
[05:59:18] already learned that lesson in a
[05:59:19] different domain. I want to I want to
[05:59:20] zoom out for a second. Right now is a
[05:59:23] period of time where I'm working really
[05:59:25] hard. I'm working a lot. I'll give you
[05:59:27] context as to what a lot is for me. So
[05:59:29] this year, the first hundred days of the
[05:59:31] year, I didn't have a day off. And so my
[05:59:35] time was only spent working. And so it's
[05:59:38] like, well, what's the difference
[05:59:39] between when you were quote working all
[05:59:41] the time when you're younger and working
[05:59:42] all the time now is that what I get done
[05:59:44] in a day is significantly greater than
[05:59:46] what I got done. And the quality of that
[05:59:48] work is also higher. Because the thing
[05:59:50] is is that you learn how to work. You
[05:59:51] get better at working the more you do
[05:59:53] it. And so a lot of people are like,
[05:59:54] "Man, I I feel like I'm not that
[05:59:55] productive when I work. Like, what
[05:59:56] should I do?" It's like, "Work more."
[05:59:57] Like, you work more until you get better
[05:59:59] at working. I remember when I was a
[06:00:00] legal intern at a at a company in France
[06:00:02] called Archma, Ama, if you want to how
[06:00:05] they say it. And I was a legal intern,
[06:00:06] and I was spending the whole summer
[06:00:08] there, which by the way, they always try
[06:00:09] and like use and abuse interns. I was
[06:00:10] like, "Man, I'm I'm working so hard."
[06:00:12] And I talked to one of these legal
[06:00:13] partners. And I only had one exchange
[06:00:15] with this particular legal partner
[06:00:16] who's, you know, high up in the firm.
[06:00:17] And she said, "Oh." She was like,
[06:00:19] "That's cute. You don't even know what
[06:00:21] work is." She said, "You don't even know
[06:00:22] how to work." She's like, "You spend
[06:00:23] time here." She's like, "But you don't
[06:00:25] know how to work." I just remember how
[06:00:27] dismissive uh what she said was. But I I
[06:00:30] understood I mean I understand now
[06:00:31] especially what she meant was like,
[06:00:32] "You're spending a lot of time here, but
[06:00:34] you're not getting anything done." And
[06:00:35] it takes time. It takes reps to get
[06:00:37] better at working itself. And so that
[06:00:39] measure of focus, the equal opposite of
[06:00:41] distraction is just how long you can
[06:00:42] stick with it. And I can tell you that
[06:00:44] me from a very visceral perspective when
[06:00:45] I work, there are many times like you
[06:00:47] know when you work and you're like,
[06:00:48] "Man, I feel like I I like need a
[06:00:50] break." The thing is just that that
[06:00:51] break period for people who aren't as
[06:00:53] good at working might be like the rest
[06:00:55] of the day. And the better and better
[06:00:56] that I've gotten at working is that I
[06:00:58] can like kind of like whip my like whip
[06:01:00] my head back in and be like confront
[06:01:02] like keep going. And I'm like all right
[06:01:05] I'm going to keep going. And then you
[06:01:06] kind of realize that there's like a 5
[06:01:08] minute sometimes 15 minute period where
[06:01:10] like your output slows a little bit but
[06:01:12] then you catch the next draft and then
[06:01:13] you're in again. It's being able to whip
[06:01:15] yourself back in. And that muscle of
[06:01:18] doing that takes practice. And the only
[06:01:20] opportunity that you get to flex that
[06:01:22] muscle, to practice it, is to work
[06:01:24] yourself to the point of fatigue, to the
[06:01:27] point where distraction or respite or
[06:01:29] rest would be beneficial or you feel
[06:01:32] like it's what you crave right now. And
[06:01:34] then being able to be like, "No, I can
[06:01:35] power through this." And the thing is is
[06:01:37] you can you can power through it. It
[06:01:39] just takes practice. And practice takes
[06:01:41] repetition and being willing to be
[06:01:42] uncomfortable for an extended period of
[06:01:44] time. And it's kind of like when you're
[06:01:45] eating and you're dieting, there are
[06:01:47] moments where you get these cravings
[06:01:48] where you're like, "Man, I'm starving. I
[06:01:49] want something sweet." If you've ever
[06:01:50] dieted before, and this is where
[06:01:52] repetitions help, it only lasts like 20
[06:01:54] minutes. So, if you ever do this, by the
[06:01:55] way, dieting hack is just set a timer
[06:01:57] when you're like, "Man, I really want
[06:01:58] something." Wait 20. And if you still
[06:02:00] want it, which you rarely do because it
[06:02:01] usually lasts less than 20, sometimes
[06:02:03] just five. It'll just go away. And the
[06:02:05] same thing happens with focus, but we
[06:02:07] then just take off. We take off for our
[06:02:09] diet for the day. we order a pizza,
[06:02:10] right? We order ice cream, right? Or we
[06:02:12] take off working for the day, right? And
[06:02:14] we just say, "I'm just going to watch
[06:02:15] Netflix for the rest of the time, or I'm
[06:02:17] just going to go hang out with friends,
[06:02:18] whatever, or I'm going to go out." But I
[06:02:21] will say now that I have worked for a
[06:02:23] 100 days straight, and that was in the
[06:02:26] earlier part of this year. I think this
[06:02:27] year I've probably taken three or four
[06:02:31] days off since the year started. And I
[06:02:33] still probably worked until like two on
[06:02:35] those days, but I still consider those
[06:02:36] like more or less days off. You're not
[06:02:38] going to die. And so I think back
[06:02:40] retroactively or like historically like
[06:02:42] there were people who were forced to
[06:02:44] work for years on end or they would get
[06:02:46] killed. As gruesome as that may seem, I
[06:02:48] see that as hopeful in that they have
[06:02:51] already demonstrated that it's possible.
[06:02:53] Like you can work continuously for an
[06:02:55] extended period of time because
[06:02:55] fundamentally you're just alive, you're
[06:02:57] moving, right? And like you think super
[06:02:59] ancestors, it's like they didn't have
[06:03:00] computers. They like they just were
[06:03:02] around. And so you do keep busy while
[06:03:04] you're awake. And so you might as well
[06:03:06] keep busy continuing to nudge things
[06:03:08] forward. And I can't tell you the amount
[06:03:09] of times where now I'm like my mind
[06:03:11] checked out and I was like, I my brain
[06:03:13] checked out a little bit, but I'm going
[06:03:14] to I'm just going to keep I'm going to
[06:03:16] keep going. And then 3 hours, 4 hours, 6
[06:03:18] hours more passed and I'm like, oh, I
[06:03:20] actually finished everything that I said
[06:03:22] I was going to do. And it's just so much
[06:03:25] more work and it's fewer days off and
[06:03:27] it's earlier mornings and longer nights.
[06:03:29] And it it it just it's being able to do
[06:03:31] that for an extended period of time. I
[06:03:33] know the whole idea of like, you know,
[06:03:34] work on the things you love and you'll
[06:03:35] never work another day in your life.
[06:03:36] That's just I just don't think it's
[06:03:38] true. Like there's the so many things
[06:03:39] that I don't enjoy doing that I have to
[06:03:41] do. And that's why at least for me, my
[06:03:43] saying is always um I will do what is
[06:03:44] required. How I feel about it is
[06:03:46] relatively irrelevant because the things
[06:03:48] that have come from doing what is
[06:03:51] required have made doing the
[06:03:53] requirements something that I know will
[06:03:55] pay off. And so I kind of like feast on
[06:03:57] those morsels of past achievements as
[06:03:59] the fuel to continue doing things that
[06:04:01] may be uncomfortable or unpleasant in
[06:04:03] the moment. And most work isn't
[06:04:05] unpleasant. It's just work. It's like I
[06:04:07] have to get this done right now. Like I
[06:04:09] get to get this done. Sure. But like I'm
[06:04:12] just being real for me. It's it's it's
[06:04:15] usually not sunshine and rainbows. Like
[06:04:16] I I work a lot and I I get and I'm
[06:04:18] tired, you know? I I um I slept 9 hours
[06:04:21] last night which was the first time I've
[06:04:22] slept 9 hours in a while and I feel
[06:04:24] amazing right now. But sometimes you got
[06:04:25] to work on six. Sometimes you got to
[06:04:27] work on five. And so think about this
[06:04:28] hypothetical extreme. Let's say that you
[06:04:30] played video games. That was all you
[06:04:32] did. When I say that's all you did, you
[06:04:33] didn't go out. You didn't talk to
[06:04:34] people. You didn't see anyone. You
[06:04:36] didn't eat. You didn't sleep. But you
[06:04:38] would be incredibly focused. Now, at
[06:04:40] that point, you say, "Well, in order for
[06:04:42] him to play more video games, he needs
[06:04:43] to sleep." So there are contingencies,
[06:04:45] right? You do need to eat or you'll die.
[06:04:47] And so there are the fewest requirements
[06:04:49] necessary to maintain consistent focus
[06:04:52] on the one thing. And those thing become
[06:04:54] requisites for focus rather than
[06:04:57] distraction. Like there are periods of
[06:04:59] time where you will need to rest. That
[06:05:01] rest therefore is productive because it
[06:05:03] increases your total output in the one
[06:05:05] thing that gets you the most leverage
[06:05:07] that gets you closest to your goals in
[06:05:09] the shortest period of time. And so this
[06:05:11] isn't a video of me saying, you know,
[06:05:13] work until you die. Well, you will work
[06:05:14] until you die because we all will die
[06:05:16] and we all probably will work at some
[06:05:17] point. But it is more video of saying
[06:05:20] that every single thing that is not a
[06:05:22] requisite for you continuing to do the
[06:05:25] one thing that one yes are all
[06:05:27] distractions. They are all things that
[06:05:29] take away. And people have a hard time
[06:05:32] with this because they like to say like
[06:05:33] you need to have balance. But this is
[06:05:35] what poor people do not understand. And
[06:05:38] I am going to do my very best to kind of
[06:05:40] like pass down a message from the future
[06:05:42] to my past self about this. And this
[06:05:44] goes for entrepreneurs specifically,
[06:05:45] which is you do not understand how much
[06:05:48] work it is. Like you think you
[06:05:49] understand how much work it is. And I've
[06:05:51] had multiple times in my life where I've
[06:05:54] met someone who was way further ahead
[06:05:56] than me and I saw them actually working
[06:05:58] 5 to 10 times more than me. And I was
[06:06:00] like, "Wow." And there's this scene in
[06:06:01] Invictus, which is a movie with Morgan
[06:06:04] Freeman and Matt Damon. I love this
[06:06:06] moment. There's an exchange. I'm
[06:06:07] paraphrasing, but he says something to
[06:06:09] the extent of, "I've heard that you've
[06:06:10] been uh playing with an injury." And
[06:06:12] Matt [music] Damon just kind of says,
[06:06:13] "Well, no one ever plays at 100%." And I
[06:06:16] just love that because to me that kind
[06:06:18] of encompasses the champion mindset,
[06:06:20] which is that it's not about playing
[06:06:23] when circumstances are perfect. It's
[06:06:25] that playing creates perfect
[06:06:26] circumstances. [music]
[06:06:27] We have to learn to play when the chips
[06:06:30] are stacked against us. It's like having
[06:06:33] values. Values are only valuable when
[06:06:35] they are tested. You can say you're
[06:06:37] loyal, but if you know a girl, if you're
[06:06:39] in a hotel room and a girl is there and
[06:06:41] your wife isn't there and there's no way
[06:06:42] that she finds out, that is the test of
[06:06:45] whether you're loyal. It's when there's
[06:06:46] stakes. Test of whether you have work
[06:06:48] ethic is whether you can work when
[06:06:49] you're tired. It's whether you can work
[06:06:50] when you're distracted. It's whether you
[06:06:52] can work on things that you don't find
[06:06:53] pleasant. Because all of the and I see
[06:06:55] this with, you know, some of the young
[06:06:56] guys, like there was a guy we hired and
[06:06:58] then in three days he said, "I don't
[06:06:59] think this is for me." And he got hired
[06:07:00] to a sales role and he was he was making
[06:07:01] outbound calls. I was like, "You don't
[06:07:03] think this is for you?" I was like, you
[06:07:04] don't even know what's for you. You were
[06:07:06] here for 3 days. You didn't even get the
[06:07:08] ability to get good at the basic thing.
[06:07:10] And so, there's a level of intolerance
[06:07:12] for discomfort in some sort of
[06:07:15] expectation that it's going to be this
[06:07:17] amazing thing that you're going to love
[06:07:18] at all times. And it's just not. And so,
[06:07:21] I would I'm okay being a different voice
[06:07:23] in the in the entrepreneur space that's
[06:07:25] not like, you know, passion is what is
[06:07:27] what gets you through the the hard
[06:07:28] times. I don't think so. Passion has not
[06:07:31] been the thing that has gotten me
[06:07:32] through my my harder times. It has been
[06:07:34] desire. It has been wanting to make
[06:07:37] something into a reality by dragging
[06:07:40] something from your mind into the world.
[06:07:43] And sometimes I feel like you're giving
[06:07:44] birth to this thing, which for every
[06:07:46] mother, which I obviously haven't given
[06:07:48] birth, it's like you give birth kicking
[06:07:49] and screaming. It's a painful
[06:07:50] experience, but then there's life that
[06:07:52] happens afterwards. And I see work as
[06:07:55] very much labor. And we even use the
[06:07:57] same word. It's labor. It's work. It's
[06:08:00] It's painful. The pain is that like
[06:08:02] you're halfway through, I would imagine,
[06:08:04] and you're like, I still have to keep
[06:08:06] pushing because it's still not alive
[06:08:07] yet. It's still not out. And so, I think
[06:08:09] learning to push through that, and this
[06:08:11] is the part that my friend was saying
[06:08:13] where he's like, they don't get it. They
[06:08:14] don't get it. They think that I do one
[06:08:16] of these speaking events and they see my
[06:08:17] Instagram and they think, "Oh, okay.
[06:08:19] Well, why is my brain not growing like
[06:08:20] that?" He's like, "Well, I was in five
[06:08:22] different cities this week and I just
[06:08:24] had to do FaceTime with my kids in order
[06:08:27] for them to see me." And people are then
[06:08:29] like, "I wouldn't make that trade."
[06:08:31] Fine, but don't want what he has. And
[06:08:33] so, let me let me draw this out for you
[06:08:35] in a nice little visual to show you how
[06:08:38] I see work, right? This volume that you
[06:08:40] need to do. So, you have excitement,
[06:08:44] right? So when you have this new idea,
[06:08:46] which we have them, and you're like, "Oh
[06:08:48] my god, this is amazing, right? This is
[06:08:51] so good." The thing is is that once you
[06:08:54] become neutral and then you become
[06:08:57] worried and stressed, this is when work
[06:09:00] begins. And so in the bodybuilding
[06:09:02] world, they'd be like, "Okay, once you
[06:09:03] have achieved failure, that is where
[06:09:05] your working reps begin." It's an old
[06:09:07] school bodybuilding thing. I'm sure the
[06:09:08] science bros will be upset about it, but
[06:09:10] I think that it very much qualifies for
[06:09:12] how it relates to work in this world is
[06:09:15] is that your motivation fades very
[06:09:17] quickly. It's that work begins once
[06:09:19] motivation stops. And I think if you
[06:09:21] measure it that way, then you will
[06:09:22] measure how much you work and how hard
[06:09:24] you work very differently. So, it
[06:09:25] reminds me this Muhammad Ali quote where
[06:09:27] he says, "I hated every minute of
[06:09:28] training, but I would tell myself,
[06:09:30] suffer now and live the rest of your
[06:09:31] life as a champion." I have this uh
[06:09:34] tweet that I said a minute ago that I
[06:09:35] really like. And so whenever I get to a
[06:09:38] low point where I think why do I even
[06:09:39] bother? I just try and remind myself
[06:09:41] this is where most people stop and this
[06:09:42] is why they don't win. That period that
[06:09:44] wall that you hit like that is that is
[06:09:47] the champion wall. That is where you you
[06:09:49] leave everyone else behind because
[06:09:50] everyone only works until their point of
[06:09:51] excitement and then they stop. It's like
[06:09:53] you have to find that next gear. So the
[06:09:55] next point is that they cannot copy
[06:10:01] your proof. People want to gain
[06:10:03] reputations. They want to be known for
[06:10:05] certain things. They want to get status.
[06:10:07] [music]
[06:10:07] But people can copy your promises. They
[06:10:11] can copy your services. They can copy
[06:10:13] your logo. They can copy your name, but
[06:10:15] they can't copy what you've done. I have
[06:10:17] sometimes younger entrepreneurs who
[06:10:19] reach out and they're like, hey, I want
[06:10:20] to build a big brand. And um they're
[06:10:22] like, I want to start making content.
[06:10:23] But I advise them to only make content
[06:10:26] if they're truly documenting and don't
[06:10:28] transition into teacher mode. Because
[06:10:30] the thing that will build your brand is
[06:10:31] the stuff you do. Like we look at the
[06:10:33] business titans that are out there,
[06:10:34] right? You look at Elon, you look at
[06:10:36] Bezos, you look at maybe now Sam Alman,
[06:10:38] you look at Jensen Hang from Nvidia and
[06:10:40] they now have these quote big business
[06:10:43] brands. Steve Jobs, Bill Gates, Warren
[06:10:45] Buffett, they are considered probably
[06:10:46] the leaders of the business world in
[06:10:48] terms of thought leadership. But did
[06:10:50] they get there by building personal
[06:10:53] brands? Or did they get there by
[06:10:55] building personal businesses and then by
[06:10:57] building personal businesses, which I'm
[06:10:59] joking here. They just built big ass
[06:11:00] businesses. By extension, people wanted
[06:11:03] to know who was the person behind this
[06:11:05] big business. And then they built their
[06:11:07] credibility before they built their
[06:11:09] likability. Everyone wants to put the
[06:11:11] car before the horse. Everyone wants to
[06:11:12] put the uh they want to eat the pudding
[06:11:14] before they have the proof. The proof
[06:11:15] comes before the pudding in the real
[06:11:16] world. In a world where anyone can say
[06:11:18] anything and get instant reach, trust is
[06:11:20] the thing that is the scarcity. That is
[06:11:22] the that is the rare commodity. And so
[06:11:26] the idea is if you want to build a
[06:11:27] really big brand, then you want to index
[06:11:29] super hard on trust. And the way that
[06:11:30] people can trust you is that you do what
[06:11:32] you said you have done. The reason Mr.
[06:11:34] Beast videos worked is because he used
[06:11:37] his videos as proof. He didn't say, "I
[06:11:39] am super knowledgeable." He said, "Look,
[06:11:40] I did something that no one else is
[06:11:42] willing to do." His first video that
[06:11:43] went viral was him counting to a million
[06:11:44] or something crazy, right? And so he did
[06:11:47] something that other people were not
[06:11:48] willing to do. And so he just happened
[06:11:49] to have documented that thing. And so if
[06:11:51] you're like, well, how do I get proof?
[06:11:53] I'm so young. It's like, well, you just
[06:11:54] do epic stuff. And then people will be
[06:11:56] like, wow, he did epic stuff. This is
[06:11:59] interesting. And so it still requires
[06:12:01] epic amounts of work in order to do
[06:12:03] that. The reason that there's such a
[06:12:04] misconception about overnight success is
[06:12:06] that it's just that there's a threshold
[06:12:08] over which you are good enough that you
[06:12:10] go viral. All right? And so this is call
[06:12:13] it like here is the viral you know viral
[06:12:15] moment. All right. So this is our viral
[06:12:17] moment right here. The thing is is that
[06:12:19] we the person lived this whole life.
[06:12:21] What we in the public see is this moment
[06:12:23] what happened since. And so we have the
[06:12:26] perception of overnight success. And
[06:12:28] this is why it's so difficult for people
[06:12:29] to wrap their heads around because they
[06:12:30] want to model what they see not what
[06:12:32] occurred. And so we have to model what
[06:12:34] they did not what happened. And so this
[06:12:37] fundamentally is the inputs. This is
[06:12:38] what they put in for a long period of
[06:12:40] time. What we see here is the output.
[06:12:43] This is what's visible. And so this is
[06:12:45] where it gets especially difficult for
[06:12:47] people trying to learn is that most
[06:12:48] people get rich and then they get weird.
[06:12:50] And then what happens is people then try
[06:12:52] and copy what they do here,
[06:12:55] not what they did to get there. And so
[06:12:57] they copy the wrong stuff. They model
[06:12:58] the plateau, not the rise. So you don't
[06:13:00] get rich by flying on private jets. You
[06:13:02] get rich then you can fly on private
[06:13:04] jets. And so a big thing that richer
[06:13:07] people do is that they will act with
[06:13:08] urgency. And I would say this is just
[06:13:10] not even richer people. This is
[06:13:11] entrepreneurs specifically that I'm
[06:13:13] making this video for is that they act
[06:13:14] with urgency. All right? And so you can
[06:13:17] tell in some ways how how successful
[06:13:19] someone's going to be by how quickly
[06:13:20] they do things. The gap between thoughts
[06:13:23] and action. And so this is something I
[06:13:24] personally work on a lot which is like
[06:13:26] how quickly between when I make a
[06:13:27] decision to do something does it
[06:13:29] actually occur. And you can improve your
[06:13:31] potency as a person, how powerful you
[06:13:33] are by decreasing the gap between
[06:13:35] thoughts and action. Like if you think
[06:13:36] about the hypothetical extreme of this,
[06:13:38] the god figure if you will, thoughts and
[06:13:40] reality are one and the same. He thinks
[06:13:42] planets and universes and they appear.
[06:13:44] And so that would be the ultimate
[06:13:45] demonstration of power in my opinion.
[06:13:47] And so we can approximate that. We can
[06:13:49] get as close to that as we can by
[06:13:51] shrinking the time it takes between when
[06:13:53] we think and when we decide and then
[06:13:55] when we ultimately do. When you don't
[06:13:57] have any more information to collect in
[06:13:58] order to make a decision, then you make
[06:14:00] the decision. And you make the decision
[06:14:02] by eliminating alternatives. So like
[06:14:05] literally the word decide comes from
[06:14:06] decadere which is Latin for to cut off.
[06:14:08] And so the question is what thing are
[06:14:10] you eliminating by making the decision
[06:14:12] that you're going to make. And a really
[06:14:13] easy tactical thing is is whenever you
[06:14:15] say I'm going to get this done by the
[06:14:16] end of the week ask yourself can I get
[06:14:17] it done by the end of the day? And that
[06:14:19] seems like a very small hack but that
[06:14:21] increases your pace of progress by 7x.
[06:14:23] And so if you hear that you're like wow
[06:14:25] 7x it's like yeah and for that reason
[06:14:27] there are people who are working 100
[06:14:28] times faster than you. And I think that
[06:14:30] this is a really good cultural thing
[06:14:31] which is uh you can just say end of day
[06:14:35] not
[06:14:37] end of week and not end of month end of
[06:14:41] week. So in each of the instances this
[06:14:43] is a 4x increase this is a 7x increase
[06:14:46] right and you can even go end of day
[06:14:48] goes into end of hour. Now this is one
[06:14:51] that I talks about a lot and she's a
[06:14:52] master operator is that she heard this
[06:14:56] from a mentor. She said, "If it's a five
[06:14:58] minute task and you have 5 minutes, do
[06:15:00] it now." And so the amount of times
[06:15:01] where I'm like, "Hey, we should do this
[06:15:02] thing." And then literally in 60 seconds
[06:15:04] it's handled by Ila, like while I'm just
[06:15:07] walking around talking just like
[06:15:08] shooting ideas out there is baffling.
[06:15:11] And so her speed of like that's a great
[06:15:14] idea, it's already been, you know,
[06:15:16] delegated out. Like she doesn't keep
[06:15:17] things on her plate. And so there's this
[06:15:19] big falseness that I think is propagated
[06:15:22] by a lot of the social media world
[06:15:24] because it feels good and to get lots of
[06:15:26] shares because it gives people
[06:15:27] permission to be lazy. It gives people
[06:15:30] permission to tell themselves that
[06:15:31] they're great just the way they are. I
[06:15:33] wholeheartedly reject that entire
[06:15:35] notion. The idea that they sell you is
[06:15:37] that you're young. You've got time. And
[06:15:39] I think that is false because all this
[06:15:42] does is extend how long it takes you to
[06:15:46] remember that number one, tomorrow isn't
[06:15:48] guaranteed. Like I just looked at my
[06:15:50] newsfeed this morning and I there was a
[06:15:51] guy that I knew who's my age and he just
[06:15:53] died of stomach cancer. Really sad.
[06:15:55] Really nice guy. Wife and three kids
[06:15:56] into fitness, really in shape. Just a
[06:15:59] freak thing that happened. And so the
[06:16:01] assumption that you've got time assumes
[06:16:03] that you know you're going to live
[06:16:05] forever, that you know you're going to
[06:16:06] live to 100. And we know that that's not
[06:16:07] true. And let me put this in
[06:16:08] perspective. Three out of 10,000 people
[06:16:12] live to 100. And so everyone has this
[06:16:14] assumption in their mind that they're
[06:16:15] like, "Yeah, I'm at 50, so I'm going to
[06:16:17] make it to 100." Yeah. Well, you've got
[06:16:18] a 3 in 10,000 shot at doing that. Very
[06:16:21] unlikely. More realistically, you'll die
[06:16:24] at the median, which is 74 for men in
[06:16:26] the US, which means that at 37, you're
[06:16:28] actually at the halfway point, just in
[06:16:30] years. But if you adjust for the
[06:16:32] increase in speed of time. So the same
[06:16:34] reason that your kid at 5 years old
[06:16:36] thinks that something takes forever when
[06:16:37] you say it's going to happen next year
[06:16:38] and when you're 40 something that
[06:16:40] happens next year feels like you blink
[06:16:42] your eyes and it's there is that when
[06:16:43] you're five one year is 20% of your
[06:16:45] life. When you're 40 one year is 2 and a
[06:16:48] half% of your life. And so it very much
[06:16:50] in real way is nine times faster than it
[06:16:52] is for your 5-year-old. And so it's my
[06:16:54] belief that as we get older we don't
[06:16:56] become more patient. Time just moves
[06:16:58] faster. And so if you adjust for that
[06:17:01] time speed, your midpoint isn't 37. It's
[06:17:04] closer to 21. And so this is also why in
[06:17:06] my opinion when you think back on your
[06:17:08] life, you have so much meat in the first
[06:17:09] 20 years. So much stuff happens, all
[06:17:11] these material life events. And it's
[06:17:13] because in that time period, it was half
[06:17:14] of your life. And then after that,
[06:17:17] everything happens real fast. And so
[06:17:19] what you have to realize is one,
[06:17:20] tomorrow isn't guaranteed. Two, nothing
[06:17:22] is going to be easy. Just get over it.
[06:17:24] Every time you think, oh, this could
[06:17:26] look just get immediately skip to it.
[06:17:27] Oh, that's not true. there's something I
[06:17:29] don't know about that. Just skip to it.
[06:17:30] The faster you can train that muscle
[06:17:32] that as soon as you have this FOMO, just
[06:17:35] slow down and realize that you don't
[06:17:36] know enough. Three, it takes time to get
[06:17:38] good. There's no one who's good at
[06:17:40] anything that was immediately good at
[06:17:41] it. And the people who are immediately
[06:17:43] good at it, I remember telling a
[06:17:44] professor, I was like, you know, I've
[06:17:45] just naturally been good at languages.
[06:17:46] He was like, when you were a kid, did
[06:17:47] you have multiple languages in your
[06:17:48] household? I was like, well, yeah, I'm
[06:17:50] bilingual. And he's like, what are you
[06:17:52] even talking about? Like, you literally
[06:17:53] started with that. So, of course,
[06:17:55] languages are easier for you. And so the
[06:17:57] thing is is that the people who have
[06:17:58] things that come naturally to them, they
[06:18:00] just only came because they forgot the
[06:18:01] work that generalized to the new skill.
[06:18:04] Once you realize that it takes time and
[06:18:05] repetitions to get good, then you also
[06:18:07] realize that the sooner you start, the
[06:18:09] sooner you get. And don't stop until you
[06:18:12] do. So let's assume you act with
[06:18:14] urgency, right? You've gotten that done.
[06:18:16] You've moved end of week to end of day.
[06:18:17] You've moved end of day to end of this
[06:18:18] hour. You moved end of month to end of
[06:18:20] this week. And you've massively
[06:18:21] increased the speed that you execute.
[06:18:22] Well, then you start running face
[06:18:25] forward into the fact that things are
[06:18:26] going to get really hard really fast.
[06:18:28] And so I will I will tell you this one
[06:18:30] is that hard is for now, not forever.
[06:18:32] And so the good thing about bad times is
[06:18:35] that they end. And the bad thing about
[06:18:37] good times is that they also end. And so
[06:18:39] whenever you're going through a good
[06:18:40] season, it's also a good reminder that
[06:18:42] this too shall pass. And so what ends up
[06:18:44] happening is that when you're in the
[06:18:46] hard time, that can give you that
[06:18:47] necessary respite. It can give you the
[06:18:49] end of the the tunnel that you can look
[06:18:50] forward to. There's only three outcomes.
[06:18:52] You either quit, it gets easier, or you
[06:18:54] get harder. So, think about that because
[06:18:56] no matter what, it always ends, but you
[06:18:59] only lose when you quit before you see
[06:19:01] it through. Because two out of the three
[06:19:03] outcomes get easier. Either it relents,
[06:19:05] the outside circumstance gets easier,
[06:19:07] like the hard thing moves, or you become
[06:19:09] harder and then by extension, it no
[06:19:11] longer feels hard for you, which I'll
[06:19:13] make this real for you right now. Think
[06:19:15] about the problems that you were
[06:19:16] stressed about 5 years ago in your
[06:19:18] business, right? Think about the things
[06:19:20] that you were dealing with, what you
[06:19:21] were stressed about. Now, think about
[06:19:23] you trying to solve those problems
[06:19:24] today. It's probably a joke to you now.
[06:19:26] You'd be like, "Well, yeah, obviously."
[06:19:27] It's not that those things became less
[06:19:29] hard, you became better. But here's
[06:19:31] where this gets really interesting for
[06:19:32] me. It just means that nothing is
[06:19:34] inherently hard to begin with anyways.
[06:19:36] We are just always inadequate. For me, I
[06:19:38] remember when I had five employees and I
[06:19:40] was like, "Man, it's so many people to
[06:19:41] manage." Or, you know, I was like,
[06:19:42] "Where am I going to, you know, I have
[06:19:44] to manage cash flow. How do I do that?"
[06:19:45] Or like, "How am I going to get new
[06:19:46] customers? like how do I how do I I
[06:19:48] can't sell really expensive stuff. Like
[06:19:50] what if someone gets upset, you know, if
[06:19:51] I if I charge more, right? What if what
[06:19:53] if someone finds out I charged this
[06:19:55] much? As though it's like something
[06:19:56] wrong. Like all of these things are just
[06:19:59] just irrelevant to me now. Just so
[06:20:01] silly. Though for me at the time, they
[06:20:03] were difficult. And I can only imagine
[06:20:05] how inconsequential the problems that I
[06:20:07] deal with growing hopefully three
[06:20:10] billion dollar companies right now
[06:20:11] within the portfolio compared to what
[06:20:12] Elon deals with having six multiple
[06:20:15] hundred billion dollar companies and I I
[06:20:18] compare myself to that so I can always
[06:20:20] feel like I have a long way to go. If
[06:20:23] you are a business owner and you're
[06:20:26] making you know you've got a legitimate
[06:20:27] business, you've got employees, revenue,
[06:20:29] profit, etc. and you'd like to see how
[06:20:32] we grow companies. Uh, every month at
[06:20:35] acquisition.com in person at my
[06:20:37] headquarters, we hold basically two-day
[06:20:40] workshops where my team, my actual, you
[06:20:42] know, director of marketing, director of
[06:20:44] sales, director of media, all of all of
[06:20:46] my team basically works with businesses
[06:20:48] to just help them grow. And it's a cool
[06:20:51] way for us to meet new companies that
[06:20:53] kind of builds our pipeline on the
[06:20:54] investment side, but it also just
[06:20:55] provides value to you guys. And so, it's
[06:20:57] kind of a cool win-win. You know, the
[06:20:59] reviews are exceptional. So the link is
[06:21:01] ACQ ACQ the letters.com
[06:21:04] vegas. You can go there and you grab a
[06:21:07] time with my team. They'll just ask you
[06:21:08] a couple questions, make sure the
[06:21:09] business makes sense that we can help
[06:21:10] you out. And if so, then we'll invite
[06:21:11] you out here to Vegas and have a have a
[06:21:13] party. Not really. It'll just be almost
[06:21:15] all entirely business. And I would
[06:21:17] encourage you not to party at least till
[06:21:18] afterwards. Uh but beyond that, let's
[06:21:20] get back to it. But let me give you one
[06:21:22] thing that that'll also give you a
[06:21:23] little bit of hope about these these
[06:21:24] hard times is that these hard times are
[06:21:28] also
[06:21:32] your best times
[06:21:35] but only in reverse. And so let me
[06:21:38] explain what I mean by that. Think about
[06:21:39] the times when you were younger and you
[06:21:41] were in love and you were poor and
[06:21:42] you're like man those were the good old
[06:21:44] days. The thing is is that when you were
[06:21:45] in that moment it was stressful. You
[06:21:46] didn't know how you're going to make
[06:21:47] ends meet, how you're going to make
[06:21:48] rent, where you're going to get food,
[06:21:49] whatever it is. You have these these
[06:21:51] hard times, the hard times that you go
[06:21:53] through today, but these hard times
[06:21:55] become the good old days. And so, we
[06:21:56] only see the truth when we look back.
[06:21:59] You have to go through them to get the
[06:22:01] perspective. And it's something that I
[06:22:02] try and like remember on a regular basis
[06:22:04] that like I'm going through the good old
[06:22:06] days. And if they're the good old days
[06:22:07] in the future, they might as well be the
[06:22:08] good old days today. So, let me tell you
[06:22:12] a little bit about what it feels like
[06:22:14] throughout this entire process. Because
[06:22:16] if you were consistently growing, you
[06:22:17] were consistently in pain. That's why
[06:22:19] they're called growing pains, not
[06:22:22] growing joys. And if you have stress
[06:22:26] from growth, remember the alternative is
[06:22:28] that you can have stress from stagnation
[06:22:30] and you can have stress from decline,
[06:22:32] which fundamentally means that hardness
[06:22:34] and stress is a fact of life. You will
[06:22:37] always have stress, you will always have
[06:22:38] problems. And the largest problem of
[06:22:40] all, the largest stressor of all is
[06:22:42] determining that having problems is a
[06:22:44] problem. Is that being stressed means
[06:22:46] there's something wrong with you. But
[06:22:48] being stressed just means you're alive.
[06:22:50] Having problems just means that you are
[06:22:52] actually doing something. I'll tell you
[06:22:53] this story that I think can drive this
[06:22:55] home. And I think this is the path to
[06:22:57] fulfillment over comfort.
[06:23:01] So imagine you talk to the creator of
[06:23:03] the universe before birth and pick the
[06:23:05] person you get to become. You say, "I
[06:23:07] want to be the most courageous." The
[06:23:09] creator replies and says, "Well then I
[06:23:11] will give you monsters to terrify you so
[06:23:12] that you can conquer them." Then you
[06:23:13] say, "Well, I want to be patient." And
[06:23:14] the creator replies, "Well, then I will
[06:23:16] make you work harder and longer so you
[06:23:17] can learn to wait." So then you say, "I
[06:23:19] want to be wise." Then the creator
[06:23:20] replies, "Then I will give you failures
[06:23:22] that will crush your spirit so you can
[06:23:23] learn the value of judgment." You then
[06:23:25] say, "Sounds like a rough life. Can you
[06:23:27] give me a good life?" Creator replies,
[06:23:29] "Just like we measure the quality of a
[06:23:30] blacksmith by the strength of his steel.
[06:23:32] I measure you by what you are at the
[06:23:34] end, not the fire and the hammer it took
[06:23:36] to make you." A good life isn't a life
[06:23:38] that's easy. A good life is a life that
[06:23:40] makes you into a good person. And that,
[06:23:42] my son, is a hard life. And so I
[06:23:44] remember when I when I sold Gym Launch,
[06:23:46] there was a year that I more or less
[06:23:47] took off. I had all these kind of
[06:23:49] existential crises that I was going
[06:23:51] through because all I had been doing is
[06:23:52] just working and working, working. Then
[06:23:54] I hadn't like put my head up to like
[06:23:55] look around and and smell the roses, per
[06:23:57] se. The problem that I had was that when
[06:23:59] I was smelling the roses, I was
[06:24:00] miserable. I was very sad. And the the
[06:24:02] sadness for me came from the thing that
[06:24:04] I had that was most reinforcing my life
[06:24:05] was the work that I was doing. That was
[06:24:07] the thing that was that I enjoyed the
[06:24:08] most. And so not having that actually
[06:24:10] created a huge loss for me. And so then
[06:24:12] I had to create like what am I doing
[06:24:13] like why am I here right and so for me
[06:24:15] that was when I created the hypothesis
[06:24:16] or at least the thesis I have for my
[06:24:18] life was that hard work is the goal is
[06:24:20] that nothing left in the tank which I
[06:24:22] got from Jesse gets which I love
[06:24:23] emptying the tank every day is the point
[06:24:26] because for me those are the days that
[06:24:27] when I look back are the days that I
[06:24:28] feel the most fulfilled on in the moment
[06:24:30] you feel tired you feel exhausted you
[06:24:32] feel like you're bored you feel like you
[06:24:33] don't want to do another repetition you
[06:24:34] don't want to do another two hours but
[06:24:36] another two hours another repetition
[06:24:37] another edit is what is required not
[06:24:40] what you want but is what is required
[06:24:41] tired and if you have a little bit left
[06:24:43] in the tank and you don't know if you
[06:24:44] have a little bit left in the tank until
[06:24:46] you empty it, until you physically can.
[06:24:48] And so I think about that steel that
[06:24:50] we're trying to make and the only
[06:24:51] difference is that we are both the steel
[06:24:53] and the blacksmith. And so the creator
[06:24:55] in this would just give you the fire and
[06:24:56] either you can stand far enough away
[06:24:58] from it that it just keeps you warm or
[06:24:59] you can go into it and you can hammer
[06:25:01] out the impurities so that you can just
[06:25:02] become better and better and better and
[06:25:04] stronger. And if you're watching this
[06:25:06] and you would like to start a business,
[06:25:08] but you're not sure where to start. I am
[06:25:10] a co-owner of school and we just started
[06:25:12] the school games. And right now we're
[06:25:13] giving $100,000 away in cash or a cyber
[06:25:17] truck to the person who builds the
[06:25:19] biggest community on school in 30 days.
[06:25:21] And so school's just a community
[06:25:23] platform that helps people start
[06:25:24] businesses. And right now, one out of
[06:25:26] two people who start a community, a paid
[06:25:29] community on school make their first
[06:25:31] dollar online. And so you're like,
[06:25:33] "Okay, well that's cool." And right now,
[06:25:35] on average, the average paid community
[06:25:36] owner makes $1,360 per month. So, this
[06:25:39] is not going to be the thing that makes
[06:25:41] you, you know, a billionaire rich, but
[06:25:43] it can help you get started, which is
[06:25:44] why I invest in the company. I spent
[06:25:45] four years looking for something that
[06:25:46] could make the easiest kind of starter
[06:25:48] business for people to get going,
[06:25:50] especially starting online. The reason
[06:25:51] that we have this success rate, right,
[06:25:53] the reason that we have this very high
[06:25:54] success rate is that I meet every single
[06:25:57] week and onboard new people. So, every
[06:25:58] Monday I'm on a call and I onboard uh,
[06:26:00] you know, right now I think it's about
[06:26:01] 300 people per call that are on there.
[06:26:03] Uh, and so I answer questions live uh
[06:26:05] with everyone on there and it's a lot of
[06:26:07] times it's the same faces. So while the
[06:26:09] the calls are relatively small, I'd
[06:26:10] encourage you to come on. On top of
[06:26:11] that, I have kind of like step-by-step
[06:26:13] instructions of exactly what you need to
[06:26:15] do that the best community owners have
[06:26:17] done. And so you can just model the
[06:26:18] behaviors. Just do this stuff. I don't
[06:26:20] explain psychology and triggers and NLP.
[06:26:22] It's just like do this stuff and this is
[06:26:24] what yields this outcome, right? And
[06:26:27] then finally, we'll give you the entire
[06:26:29] platform that basically makes all the
[06:26:31] tech really easy. And so right now we've
[06:26:34] got people who aren't in foreign
[06:26:35] countries who don't speak English. Uh
[06:26:37] we've got I mean I think there was a guy
[06:26:38] who won the games 15 years old. So like
[06:26:41] I'm telling you it's not rocket science.
[06:26:42] Like we've really taken a lot of effort
[06:26:44] to make it as simple as humanly
[06:26:45] possible. You don't need any other
[06:26:46] software to make this work. And so if
[06:26:49] that sounds at all interesting, the best
[06:26:50] part about all of this is that you can
[06:26:53] start absolutely free. And so we have
[06:26:55] the course, we have the calls, we have
[06:26:56] the platform, and we also have the
[06:26:57] community of other people. All right?
[06:26:58] And so you can start for free, get 14
[06:27:00] days. uh you can click the link which is
[06:27:02] uh right here. Oops, other way around.
[06:27:05] school.com/games
[06:27:07] start for free and hopefully I'll see
[06:27:09] you on the other side. And so a big part
[06:27:11] of why this is so hard is that so few
[06:27:13] people want to go into the fire, right?
[06:27:15] And the fire could be entrepreneurship.
[06:27:16] The fire could be content creation. The
[06:27:18] fire could be starting a new product.
[06:27:20] The fire could be doing outreach and
[06:27:21] knocking on doors or quitting your job
[06:27:23] and and and starting another job in a
[06:27:25] completely different industry. That's
[06:27:26] the fire. It's the thing that other
[06:27:27] people aren't willing to do and they
[06:27:29] tell you not to do it because it helps
[06:27:30] them justify the risk that they chose
[06:27:32] not to take. It helps them feel better
[06:27:34] about the risks they aren't willing to
[06:27:36] make. I remember thinking about this at
[06:27:38] long length when I was younger and I
[06:27:40] thought about the word exceptional.
[06:27:42] Right? So buried in the word itself is
[06:27:46] the key point which is that you cannot
[06:27:48] expect to be accepted. If you want to be
[06:27:51] exceptional, to become exceptional, by
[06:27:53] definition, you have to become the
[06:27:55] exception, which means you have to be
[06:27:57] unlike other people. You have to do what
[06:27:59] they don't agree with. If they agreed
[06:28:01] with you, if everyone agrees with you,
[06:28:03] you can be sure that it's the wrong
[06:28:04] path. When I quit my job, every single
[06:28:07] person in my life told me it was a bad
[06:28:08] idea. I graduated in three years from
[06:28:10] Vanderbilt. I had a nice white collar
[06:28:11] consulting job. I was set up to go to
[06:28:13] grad school to one of the Ivy Leagues. I
[06:28:15] had acedc. Like, I was set up. I'd done
[06:28:17] the path. And so for me to quit and be
[06:28:19] like, I'm going to I'm going to be a
[06:28:20] personal trainer for minimum wage at a
[06:28:21] gym, that was not a happy news for the
[06:28:24] vast majority of people that I knew. But
[06:28:25] the thing is is that I've had those
[06:28:26] conversations multiple times in my life.
[06:28:28] When I ended up leaving the gyms and
[06:28:31] started the turnaround business, every
[06:28:32] person was like, you finally made this
[06:28:33] thing work. You finally, you know, now
[06:28:36] we finally agree with you again. And it
[06:28:37] was right at the point where they
[06:28:38] accepted me that I was like, you know
[06:28:39] what? I think I want to do this other
[06:28:40] thing and I'm going to sell all these
[06:28:42] gyms for basically nothing in 90 days to
[06:28:44] then start new. And they're like, "But
[06:28:46] you spent so long on this." And they see
[06:28:48] sunk cost fallacy. And the thing is is
[06:28:50] don't listen to the people who are
[06:28:52] closest to you. Listen to the people who
[06:28:54] are closest to your goals. And so a lot
[06:28:56] of people like to think about how they
[06:28:59] have these mentors and these heroes. But
[06:29:01] the most important group is your
[06:29:03] reference group. And your reference
[06:29:04] group is who you compare yourself to.
[06:29:06] But the thing is that people think they
[06:29:07] compare themselves to their mentors and
[06:29:09] their heroes. But they don't. Who you
[06:29:10] compare yourself to is who influences
[06:29:13] your decisions. So the voices you hear,
[06:29:16] the voices you listen to when you're
[06:29:18] about to make a big move, those voices
[06:29:21] are your actual reference group. And if
[06:29:23] those voices are not close to your goal,
[06:29:25] you should not listen to them. If
[06:29:27] anything, sometimes the best advice in
[06:29:30] the world is do the opposite of whatever
[06:29:31] it is that they did to get in their
[06:29:32] life. If you don't want what they have,
[06:29:34] don't listen to what they say. Even when
[06:29:36] you're an entrepreneur, so let's fast
[06:29:37] forward a couple years. So there was a
[06:29:39] point where I started uh the outbound
[06:29:42] team. So, this is going to sound super
[06:29:43] tactical, but I'm going to zoom out for
[06:29:45] you. So, we at Gym Launch had we were
[06:29:48] all paid ads for the most part. We I
[06:29:50] made content, I had a book, like there
[06:29:51] were things that were out there, but
[06:29:52] still 70% plus of my of my new customers
[06:29:54] came from paid ads. And I knew that if I
[06:29:56] wanted to sell the company, I would have
[06:29:58] to create a second acquisition channel
[06:30:00] that was very different from the primary
[06:30:02] one so that I could create more
[06:30:03] stability so you don't have one itis,
[06:30:04] one point of failure within the
[06:30:06] business. And so I remember reading this
[06:30:09] book about how to set up outbound and it
[06:30:11] said it will take a year and I said I'm
[06:30:12] really good at marketing, really good at
[06:30:13] sales. It'll take me 12 weeks and it
[06:30:15] took 12 months like the book said. And
[06:30:19] so when I walked through that, what was
[06:30:22] interesting is it took 90 days for us to
[06:30:24] get our first sale. And the whole time
[06:30:26] I'm investing in this team, I'm
[06:30:27] investing in software, I'm investing in
[06:30:29] training and consulting to like learn
[06:30:30] how to get all this stuff going just to
[06:30:32] get our first sale. But that's not very
[06:30:34] good for the amount of time and effort
[06:30:36] we put into it. And then 3 months, you
[06:30:38] know, after that, we started getting a
[06:30:40] couple sales trickling in. Still not a
[06:30:42] lot. And I actually had almost like an
[06:30:43] intervention from my my executive team
[06:30:46] that were like, "Hey, we think this is
[06:30:48] shiny object." They were using my words
[06:30:50] against me. They're like, "We think this
[06:30:51] is a distraction. It's it's not, you
[06:30:53] know, yielding a result for us. I don't
[06:30:55] I think we should, you know, cut our
[06:30:57] losses and and move on." And I just I
[06:30:59] kept thinking to myself like, "This is
[06:31:01] what hard feels like." like we have to
[06:31:03] just keep inching our way through it
[06:31:05] because we have made sales which means
[06:31:06] we could just we just need to get more
[06:31:08] efficient at it. And then we did another
[06:31:09] six months and then we got to the point
[06:31:10] where it became 50% of revenue. But
[06:31:12] here's the thing that you you don't see.
[06:31:14] And so whether you're starting a new
[06:31:15] acquisition channel like I was, you're
[06:31:17] starting paid ads, whatever, is that if
[06:31:20] I tell you in one year I could double
[06:31:23] your business, right? Let's say you have
[06:31:25] to pay me $100,000, right? And in one
[06:31:28] year I will double your business. Many
[06:31:30] people would probably be like, "Yeah,
[06:31:32] sign me up. I'll do it. Maybe I'll take
[06:31:33] a loan." But even for the 100, like if I
[06:31:35] know I'm going to double my business in
[06:31:36] a year, I would do it. Okay. But then
[06:31:37] what happens is month one, they drop 5K
[06:31:41] and then they lose 5K. And then month
[06:31:43] two, they lose 5K again. And then they
[06:31:46] say, "Ah, ads aren't for me. H
[06:31:48] Outbound's not for me." But the thing is
[06:31:50] is that the way it actually feels is
[06:31:52] that you lose 5K, you lose another 5K,
[06:31:55] you lose another 5K, and then all of a
[06:31:57] sudden one month you make 25K, and then
[06:31:59] the next month you make 50K, and you
[06:32:01] make all of this back and some, but it
[06:32:05] happens all at once. And so there's a
[06:32:06] saying on Wall Street that I like, which
[06:32:08] is it happens slower than you expect and
[06:32:10] then faster than you can imagine. And
[06:32:11] they talk about that when it comes to
[06:32:13] market drops and market explosions. It's
[06:32:15] like we should like this, we should be
[06:32:17] crashing. It hasn't adjusted yet. It
[06:32:18] happens slower than you expect and then
[06:32:20] faster than you can imagine. And so you
[06:32:21] have to be willing to forego that period
[06:32:23] of time for a long time understanding
[06:32:25] that you just want to make progress. And
[06:32:27] so I think the thing that separates
[06:32:29] masters from beginners is that masters
[06:32:32] have more ways to win. So you can
[06:32:34] measure your expertise in anything by
[06:32:36] the ways you can measure equaling the
[06:32:38] number of times and ways you can win.
[06:32:39] And so if you're an expert at making
[06:32:43] videos, then throughout the entire
[06:32:45] process of a really long project, you
[06:32:47] have many wins on the way. You know all
[06:32:50] the little progress markers that occur
[06:32:52] to create some big outcome and you
[06:32:54] approximate those little progress
[06:32:55] markers for the ultimate goal at the
[06:32:57] end. When you're a beginner, you only
[06:32:58] see the output and all you see is I'm
[06:33:01] doing stuff and nothing is happening.
[06:33:03] But you just aren't able to mark
[06:33:04] progress well. And so if you want to
[06:33:07] increase your expertise, then you need
[06:33:09] to increase the number of ways you can
[06:33:11] measure so that you can increase the
[06:33:13] number of wins you have in a given time
[06:33:15] period. And by the way, that is what
[06:33:17] makes you enjoy your work. And this is
[06:33:19] how the work itself becomes reinforcing.
[06:33:21] And so in order to develop that
[06:33:22] expertise, you have to have education.
[06:33:25] And people think that education is
[06:33:27] expensive. But the only thing more
[06:33:29] expensive than education is not being
[06:33:32] educated. And so I would say that in my
[06:33:34] life I spent more money than I could
[06:33:36] possibly imagine is simply trying to
[06:33:37] acquire skills and relationships that
[06:33:39] would make me better. To give you an
[06:33:41] idea, I think the most expensive thing
[06:33:43] that I bought for this, this is not
[06:33:44] including uh me messing stuff up and
[06:33:46] just losing tons of money, but I
[06:33:48] actually wrote a check for was $350,000
[06:33:51] to have a dinner with a guy who was
[06:33:52] worth 7 billion. And I got exactly what
[06:33:56] I wanted from that dinner and it was
[06:33:57] incredibly valuable for me. And uh he
[06:33:59] kept saying no. I I offered 100k and
[06:34:02] then 200k and 250k and then 350k and
[06:34:04] when we offered 350k he said fine I'll
[06:34:07] just have dinner with you and he didn't
[06:34:08] ask for the money [laughter] but I think
[06:34:09] he was just seeing that I was willing to
[06:34:11] spend the $350,000 for it and so I have
[06:34:13] spent so much money for 1 hour 2 hours
[06:34:17] anything to gain context because I I
[06:34:20] heard this close and you've heard if
[06:34:22] you've watched my channel you've heard
[06:34:23] this before but pick whatever number
[06:34:24] your income goal is right let's say it's
[06:34:26] a million dollars a year and let's say
[06:34:28] you're currently making $100 $100,000 a
[06:34:31] year. If
[06:34:33] you value that million- dollar goal, the
[06:34:35] value of the million dollars per year,
[06:34:38] what's the price you put on that
[06:34:39] education? The value of that education
[06:34:41] is the difference between where you're
[06:34:42] at and where you want to go. And so
[06:34:44] that's why if I want to if I want to
[06:34:45] become a Deca billionaire, then I should
[06:34:47] be willing to pay everything that I have
[06:34:49] in order to gain the skills, the
[06:34:51] experience, the knowledge in order to
[06:34:52] get there. And so if there's a way that
[06:34:54] you can spend $50,000 in order to learn
[06:34:56] a million per year skill set, then every
[06:35:00] year you don't do it, you lose $950,000
[06:35:02] that you would have made if you had made
[06:35:04] that investment. And so the the key
[06:35:07] point here is that we use poor people
[06:35:09] language when we talk about education
[06:35:11] when we should be using investor
[06:35:12] language because it should be an
[06:35:13] investment in an asset and the asset
[06:35:15] just happens to be you and you can't
[06:35:17] sell it, but you can invest in it and
[06:35:18] you can grow it. If you think about
[06:35:20] investments, you'll never say an
[06:35:21] investment is expensive. There's just a
[06:35:24] cost and a return. But if someone says
[06:35:25] there's a $100 stock or $1,000 stock, it
[06:35:28] could be expensive relative to the
[06:35:30] return. But if the return is supposed to
[06:35:32] be good, then no one says that that
[06:35:34] amount of money itself is expensive.
[06:35:36] It's just what the cost is for the
[06:35:38] return. It is the investment. And so if
[06:35:40] you think about education in that same
[06:35:42] way, it always has to be framed in terms
[06:35:43] of what you get for it, not how much it
[06:35:44] costs. It's not about how much you make
[06:35:47] now. It's how much you're going to make
[06:35:49] and how much that's worth to you. And
[06:35:50] for me, whatever my delta is is what I'm
[06:35:53] willing to pour into that without
[06:35:54] hesitation. And so for the first
[06:35:57] probably I mean shoot, I lost everything
[06:35:59] at year whatever six of my
[06:36:00] entrepreneurial journey. And I put all
[06:36:02] of the extra money that I had right back
[06:36:05] into learning more stuff. And so even
[06:36:06] though I made profit, my like biggest
[06:36:08] expense was me. But it wasn't on my
[06:36:11] living and my lifestyle. It was on my
[06:36:12] education and my network and my
[06:36:14] surroundings and the skills I wanted to
[06:36:15] learn. The courses, the workshops, the
[06:36:17] seminars, the coaching programs, all the
[06:36:18] things that I did. I'm a product of that
[06:36:20] world despite the fact that I think that
[06:36:21] world overall has a lot of shitty
[06:36:22] people. I still learned a lot. And you
[06:36:25] can learn just as much by learning what
[06:36:27] not to do and say I will never do that
[06:36:28] or treat someone the way that person
[06:36:30] treated me because the best students
[06:36:32] never come out negative. So really like
[06:36:34] think that like I have always been the
[06:36:38] top performer in every single program,
[06:36:42] coaching, whatever I have ever done. And
[06:36:44] so the process that I use is number one,
[06:36:47] do everything they tell you to to the
[06:36:50] tea the first time. Then take what works
[06:36:54] and toss the rest. You can learn
[06:36:56] something from everyone, but only take
[06:36:58] in that which makes you stronger, which
[06:36:59] is a quote that I have from Harry
[06:37:01] Potter, the Sword of Gryffindor. But I
[06:37:02] love it because it was enchanted to have
[06:37:04] this this spell that it would only take
[06:37:06] in things that made it stronger. So it
[06:37:07] took in the bass venom which allowed it
[06:37:09] to kill you know the horcruxes later on.
[06:37:11] But I like to see myself as that sword
[06:37:13] is that I continue to invest. I continue
[06:37:15] to put things into the steel but I only
[06:37:17] take in that which makes me stronger. So
[06:37:19] a lot of people have these negative
[06:37:20] experiences with coaches, consultants,
[06:37:22] vendors, whatever. And I just like to
[06:37:24] think to myself like in what way will
[06:37:25] this make me better? And so by instead
[06:37:28] asking that question rather than
[06:37:29] enumerating the many things they could
[06:37:31] have done better or the things they did
[06:37:32] wrong simply saying there is something
[06:37:34] that I can learn from this and there is
[06:37:36] something in this experience that will
[06:37:37] make me stronger. And that frame may
[06:37:39] have been one of the most valuable
[06:37:40] frames that I've had because I like you
[06:37:42] have spent plenty of money on things
[06:37:43] that have quote not worked but I still
[06:37:46] learned enough from them and oftentimes
[06:37:48] what not to do that allowed me to then
[06:37:50] see what to do. But before I ever did
[06:37:52] that, I had to do the first three steps
[06:37:54] of that, which was do everything they
[06:37:56] said to the tea the first time. And if
[06:37:59] for whatever reason it did not work, I
[06:38:02] would then use my other skills to patch
[06:38:03] the difference so that I could find a
[06:38:06] way to make it work. And by the way, if
[06:38:08] they have a success story, which they
[06:38:09] usually do cuz that's how they sold you,
[06:38:11] is that you find that person and figure
[06:38:14] out what they are doing that is lacking
[06:38:16] in the education that the person who's
[06:38:17] teaching taught. Fundamentally, if you
[06:38:19] ever buy something where there is
[06:38:21] somebody who has been successful, then
[06:38:22] it means there are activities that yield
[06:38:24] success. And the discrepancy, I'm going
[06:38:27] to show this to you visually because I
[06:38:28] think it's important. So, let's say
[06:38:29] there's a bridge, right? And you've got,
[06:38:33] you know, here's here's money and here's
[06:38:35] you. Okay? So, you've got this path that
[06:38:38] someone uh shows you how to do. So, you
[06:38:41] paid money and they give you these
[06:38:43] little bricks here, right? They give you
[06:38:44] these little bricks that you paid money
[06:38:45] for. And maybe these bricks, you had to
[06:38:47] pay different vendors, different amounts
[06:38:48] of money for each one of these bricks,
[06:38:50] but you still haven't made money yet.
[06:38:51] The thing is is that there's a gap here.
[06:38:54] And the reason that some people are
[06:38:55] successful with some people's uh, you
[06:38:57] know, programs or implementations and
[06:38:59] other people aren't is because that the
[06:39:01] people who already bought that brick
[06:39:02] from somebody else before that, that
[06:39:05] brick isn't missing. And so if you see
[06:39:07] the education you have as these bricks
[06:39:09] on the road, then you wouldn't say that
[06:39:11] the foundation of a house is in some way
[06:39:13] a ripoff. you would just say it's not a
[06:39:15] complete house. Now, if they sold you
[06:39:17] the expectation that you would have a
[06:39:19] house, sure, you could be upset by them,
[06:39:21] but they still helped you build a
[06:39:22] foundation. And so, it's the same people
[06:39:24] who get upset saying, "Oh, I learned
[06:39:26] arithmetic from Mrs. Glass, but then
[06:39:28] when I found Mr. Hardwick and he taught
[06:39:30] me calculus, she only taught me
[06:39:32] arithmetic. She is a moron." You
[06:39:33] wouldn't say that, but for some reason,
[06:39:35] people talk about the basics of business
[06:39:37] the same way when they become more
[06:39:39] advanced. If someone taught you how to
[06:39:41] do outbound and do warm outreach so that
[06:39:43] you could sell your first customers and
[06:39:44] someone else later teaches you how to
[06:39:46] run ads, well, you probably learned how
[06:39:48] to work the leads from the ads that work
[06:39:49] for you because you learned how to do
[06:39:50] outbound. You probably learned how to
[06:39:51] sell because you learned how to sell
[06:39:52] strangers. And so when you did the ads,
[06:39:54] it worked for you. And then somebody
[06:39:55] else who did that same exact
[06:39:56] implementation, didn't have the bricks
[06:39:58] that you had and they never got the
[06:40:00] dollars that came across. And so
[06:40:02] whenever something doesn't work, if you
[06:40:04] can, it doesn't make you any better by
[06:40:06] saying it's their fault. And fault also
[06:40:08] only matters in the eyes of the law,
[06:40:10] which you're not going to sue anybody
[06:40:11] anyways. So, who gives a [ __ ] The only
[06:40:13] thing that matters is whether the
[06:40:14] outcome happens or not, which is under
[06:40:16] your control because it means that you
[06:40:18] simply have a discrepancy in where you
[06:40:19] are and where you want to go. And so, a
[06:40:21] lot of people would then say, "Sure,
[06:40:23] Alex, it's easy for you to say you're a
[06:40:25] white guy. You're right. Cool. So, just
[06:40:28] don't watch the video and move on." Um,
[06:40:29] but for everybody else, you've got
[06:40:31] connections,
[06:40:33] you've got money, you've got looks,
[06:40:36] you've got intellect or intelligence.
[06:40:37] These are all great, but you can beat
[06:40:40] all of these. You can beat somebody who
[06:40:42] has all four if you have one thing,
[06:40:45] which is the desire to improve, the
[06:40:49] insatiable desire to improve. No matter
[06:40:51] where you start, if you have this, it's
[06:40:53] hard to beat someone who improves every
[06:40:55] second of every day without stopping,
[06:40:58] without giving up. And so I have met
[06:41:00] people who have connections, money,
[06:41:00] looks, and intelligence. And they do not
[06:41:03] people who have an insatiable desire to
[06:41:04] improve, who do not stop. And so if you
[06:41:07] think about it like this, if life were a
[06:41:09] race where at the end you die, so got to
[06:41:12] finish first, right? There are people
[06:41:14] who may start at different parts of that
[06:41:17] race, but what is not measured is the
[06:41:20] speed that you can move. And so, I don't
[06:41:22] know if you've seen these these clips
[06:41:23] that have gone viral in the NFL where
[06:41:24] they have like one of their wide
[06:41:25] receivers start like 20 yards behind a
[06:41:27] fan and they have to race the length of
[06:41:29] the football field and then the wide
[06:41:30] receiver will usually catch up like talk
[06:41:32] to them and then just speed right past
[06:41:34] them. And so, it's far less about where
[06:41:36] you start because that's where a lot of
[06:41:38] losers will define themselves. They'll
[06:41:39] define themselves by what happened to
[06:41:41] them rather than what they made happen.
[06:41:43] and somebody else may be here, but it
[06:41:45] only matters if you think that there's
[06:41:47] fairness. But I don't believe fairness
[06:41:48] is something that exists in the
[06:41:50] universe. And so I don't hold it as an
[06:41:52] ideal that I proclaim must exist. But
[06:41:54] there is simply a starting point in a
[06:41:56] rate of progress. And the starting point
[06:41:58] you can't control, but the rate of
[06:41:59] progress you can. And so control what
[06:42:01] you can control. If education is a
[06:42:04] change in behavior, that's what you do.
[06:42:05] If you become educated, you do something
[06:42:06] different after you learn something.
[06:42:08] Then intelligence is rate of learning
[06:42:10] which means that you can in a very real
[06:42:11] way influence it's the rate of learning
[06:42:14] the speed of learning. You can influence
[06:42:16] how quickly you move along this race
[06:42:19] independent of where you start. And
[06:42:20] you'll also note that the person here
[06:42:24] has no influence on what this person
[06:42:26] does. These two people are independent
[06:42:28] nodes. The only reason that this person
[06:42:30] gets upset is that they think it's not
[06:42:33] fair. And if you just eliminate fairness
[06:42:35] from your vocabulary and think only in
[06:42:37] terms of what do I need to do, then it
[06:42:39] eliminates a lot of the distraction that
[06:42:41] keeps you poor. So if you call recall
[06:42:44] from the very beginning, lazy people get
[06:42:47] distracted. They focus on distraction.
[06:42:50] And one of the biggest distractions is
[06:42:51] it's not fair. It's it's not fair. I
[06:42:53] shouldn't have to. I should get. I
[06:42:55] should. I should. It should. Things
[06:42:58] shouldn't. It's all shoulds. And I will
[06:43:01] tell you that should in my worldview
[06:43:05] should not exist because should creates
[06:43:08] expectations of an uncaring universe. It
[06:43:10] says that you demand something and I
[06:43:12] promise you that the universe will win.
[06:43:14] And so all you have to do is watch like
[06:43:16] baby seals just get immediately eaten by
[06:43:18] orcas after like a mother is laying
[06:43:20] there on the ice to be like, "Wow, life
[06:43:23] isn't fair." I'm sure that seal could be
[06:43:25] like, "It's not fair that my babies were
[06:43:27] literally eaten in front of me." Tough,
[06:43:29] right? Tough. They have mammal brains.
[06:43:31] We can see that they got they got some
[06:43:32] feelings, right? And so if we go back to
[06:43:36] the sword of Gryffindor, does demanding
[06:43:38] that it should be fair make you
[06:43:39] stronger? Does saying that that person
[06:43:41] started further ahead of you in any way
[06:43:43] benefit you? No. Because your actions
[06:43:46] are entirely independent from them. And
[06:43:48] so the only thing that that does is
[06:43:50] actually delay your speed of taking
[06:43:52] action. It makes you dumber. Because if
[06:43:54] we define intelligence by rate of
[06:43:56] learning, then it means it takes you
[06:43:58] longer to learn. It makes you stupid.
[06:44:00] And I think that that's why people stay
[06:44:02] here for a very long time.
[06:44:05] And many of them never leave. So one of
[06:44:08] the things
[06:44:10] that bad entrepreneurs talk about with
[06:44:13] good entrepreneurs is one of the excuses
[06:44:16] they'll make is that they will make
[06:44:18] preference excuses. They will make
[06:44:19] trade-off excuses. They will say this is
[06:44:23] not worth the price. In which case,
[06:44:25] fine, but don't also want the thing. So
[06:44:28] for example, privacy is the price of
[06:44:30] fame. Loneliness is the price of
[06:44:32] ambition. Pleasure is the price of
[06:44:35] discipline. Novelty is the price of
[06:44:37] loyalty. Discretion is the price of
[06:44:40] trust. And so so many people want the
[06:44:42] benefits of these traits, but can't
[06:44:45] afford the cost or the price. They're
[06:44:47] not willing to be discreet, but they
[06:44:48] want someone to trust them. They can't
[06:44:49] hold someone's secrets. They they want
[06:44:51] somebody to be be loyal to them at home,
[06:44:54] but then they want the thrill of the new
[06:44:56] relationship. They want the benefits of
[06:44:57] discipline, of consistency, but they
[06:44:59] can't trade the pleasure in the moment.
[06:45:02] They want ambition, but they're not
[06:45:05] willing to pay the price of being
[06:45:06] lonely, of being the exception. They
[06:45:08] want fame, but then all of a sudden they
[06:45:11] are startled when they realize that they
[06:45:13] have no privacy. And so each of these
[06:45:15] things are tradeoffs. And if you're not
[06:45:18] willing to make the trade, fine, but
[06:45:20] don't [ __ ] about it. And and I think
[06:45:22] part of it is that we have a hard time
[06:45:24] understanding to what degree. And so
[06:45:26] each of these ideals are not binary.
[06:45:31] It's not discretion. It's how much
[06:45:33] discretion you have. It's not novelty,
[06:45:34] it's how much novelty. It's not
[06:45:35] pleasure, it's how much pleasure. It's
[06:45:37] not loneliness, it's how lonely. And
[06:45:38] it's not hard work. It's how hard do you
[06:45:41] have to work and how long do you have to
[06:45:43] work? And so most people, and I think
[06:45:45] this is where a lot of the complaints
[06:45:46] come, is that they believe they're doing
[06:45:48] 10 out of 10 work, right? They're like,
[06:45:50] I'm do this is 10 out of 10 hard for me
[06:45:52] right now, but they're actually only
[06:45:55] doing onetenth
[06:45:58] of the amount of work that it takes to
[06:46:00] get to this goal. And so they might be
[06:46:02] doing a 10 out of 10 work for a 100K
[06:46:04] goal, but they're doing a 1 out of 10
[06:46:06] work for a $1 million goal. And I think
[06:46:09] a lot of that work comes down to being
[06:46:10] able to accurately assess reality and
[06:46:14] see what your actual discrepancies are
[06:46:16] and realize how much work you really
[06:46:18] have to do in order to get good at every
[06:46:20] one of those discrepancies because most
[06:46:22] outcomes don't occur until you've met
[06:46:24] all of the conditions like a pipeline.
[06:46:26] All right? So let's say you've got this
[06:46:28] pipeline here and you've got these
[06:46:29] valves. These are the valves. You've got
[06:46:31] this water that's coming here and let's
[06:46:33] say once you get all the way through the
[06:46:34] water comes out the other side. These
[06:46:36] valves have to open. You have to open
[06:46:39] this thing. Open each of these valves.
[06:46:42] And let's say you've checked off three
[06:46:43] of the four boxes. The water's still
[06:46:45] going to be stuck here. You're still not
[06:46:46] going to get the water through. And so
[06:46:48] the thing is is that as much as you work
[06:46:49] and you're like, "But I did that and I
[06:46:51] did that and that didn't work and that
[06:46:53] didn't work. It may have worked. It just
[06:46:56] might not have met every condition to
[06:46:58] get the outcome." And so if you think
[06:46:59] about life and outcomes that way, it
[06:47:01] gets a lot easier because it stops being
[06:47:03] emotional. You can simply say there's a
[06:47:04] condition that I haven't met and I have
[06:47:06] to figure out what that condition is
[06:47:07] rather than proclaiming that the
[06:47:09] universe isn't fair or that you you
[06:47:11] started further back and that's why your
[06:47:14] effort hasn't resulted in it. Maybe and
[06:47:18] maybe this person only has to meet three
[06:47:20] of these and you have to meet four.
[06:47:23] Okay. Well, then I guess that means that
[06:47:24] you're going to be better than them. Why
[06:47:27] is that a bad thing? It means that
[06:47:28] you're going to develop more skills to
[06:47:29] achieve the same goal. Great. If the end
[06:47:32] of this life is that you are the steel,
[06:47:35] you are the thing that gets created,
[06:47:37] then you can't resent the hammer and the
[06:47:39] fire that makes you. Because you can't
[06:47:41] wish for strong character and an easy
[06:47:43] life because the price of each is the
[06:47:45] other. So either people aren't
[06:47:47] succeeding because they don't understand
[06:47:48] that they have to make a trade that
[06:47:49] they're not willing to make or the trade
[06:47:51] that they're currently making isn't
[06:47:52] sufficient. So they either think that
[06:47:54] they deserve to get the Nike shoes just
[06:47:56] for being who they are and think it's
[06:47:58] not fair and think that the store owner
[06:47:59] should just give them the Nike shoes.
[06:48:00] And look, all you have to do is look at
[06:48:01] the news. There's plenty of people who
[06:48:02] think that way and they go and try and
[06:48:04] take it, right? But that makes them a
[06:48:05] thief. That makes them significantly
[06:48:07] worse. It actually does more harm to
[06:48:08] them in my opinion. But there are people
[06:48:10] who believe that. That's the worst.
[06:48:12] That's the lowest level. The next level
[06:48:13] above that is people who say, "No, I'm
[06:48:15] willing to pay for the Nikes, but I'll
[06:48:16] pay 30." It's like, "Yeah, but they're
[06:48:18] they're 300. That's the price." It's
[06:48:21] like, "Yeah, but I'll pay 30." They
[06:48:22] don't extend they understand the extent
[06:48:24] of the trade-off and then they complain
[06:48:26] that their $30 isn't good enough. It
[06:48:28] shouldn't be so expensive. It is what it
[06:48:30] is. And so there's a saying that Leila
[06:48:32] and I say a lot internally. I'm like it
[06:48:33] takes what it takes. And so if we want
[06:48:35] this thing, what often has to happen is
[06:48:37] you have to keep bidding. It's much more
[06:48:39] like an auction of a trade-off because
[06:48:41] the real world level three is that you
[06:48:43] see the Nikes and then you bid 30 and
[06:48:46] then you realize it's not enough. And
[06:48:48] rather than moan or put your thing down
[06:48:50] and walk away, you're like 50. And
[06:48:52] they're like, you're like 100.
[06:48:56] You're like, God. And so that is the
[06:48:58] pain is being able to consistently reset
[06:49:00] the expectations and bid again and again
[06:49:03] and again until eventually you make it
[06:49:06] all the way through and you bid $300.
[06:49:10] You do get your Nikes and then all of a
[06:49:12] sudden everyone says
[06:49:15] must be nice to be born so naturally
[06:49:19] good. All you have to do by the way is
[06:49:21] watch some of my very first content
[06:49:22] pieces. And you think my very first
[06:49:24] content pieces are the podcasts that I
[06:49:25] made. various for content pieces that I
[06:49:27] made I made for my gyms 13 years ago.
[06:49:30] And so it's like, man, you're so
[06:49:32] naturally good on camera. Watch those
[06:49:33] videos. [laughter]
[06:49:35] Tell me if you think the same way. I had
[06:49:36] to take shots before the videos cuz I
[06:49:38] was so nervous about sounding stupid. In
[06:49:39] the fourth version, I would say like the
[06:49:40] highest version of this. So let let's
[06:49:42] I'll I'll break this down. So the zero
[06:49:44] level of trade-offs is should you just
[06:49:48] say you should get it for nothing. The
[06:49:50] next level is too much. So you say it's
[06:49:53] 30 bucks, but it's actually 300. And you
[06:49:56] say it should. The next level is
[06:49:59] bidding. So you bid. So you say 30, 50,
[06:50:04] 100, and you find out that you're
[06:50:05] insufficient. You keep going up. The
[06:50:07] final is source, which is where you
[06:50:09] determine the price. And this is often,
[06:50:10] in my opinion, where you create your
[06:50:12] reality. So, it's continuing to hammer
[06:50:15] away at content, continuing to write
[06:50:17] drafts of the book before anyone else
[06:50:19] has seen it because you are the one that
[06:50:21] holds a standard higher than everyone
[06:50:22] else's because no longer do you accept
[06:50:25] the approval of others as your litmus
[06:50:28] test. The market for sure in the
[06:50:30] beginning will tell you whether you're
[06:50:31] good or not. But Steve Jobs, Henry Ford,
[06:50:34] right, they would have asked for faster
[06:50:35] horses, not cars, is that they demand
[06:50:39] more from themselves than anyone else
[06:50:41] does. And by setting that standard here
[06:50:43] where everyone else is here, by actually
[06:50:46] meeting the standards of the market, you
[06:50:48] actually lower your own. And so this is
[06:50:50] where your standards become source. And
[06:50:52] this is where you get into rarified air.
[06:50:53] And this is what the quote rich guys, if
[06:50:57] you will, when we talk behind closed
[06:50:59] doors about what people don't
[06:51:00] understand. It's about holding the
[06:51:02] standard. And in my opinion, the person
[06:51:03] who should make the decision in every
[06:51:05] organization is the person who has the
[06:51:06] highest standard. It's not the person
[06:51:07] who's most senior, not the person who
[06:51:09] has the most shares. It's the person who
[06:51:11] has the highest standards for whatever
[06:51:12] it is. Our marketing should be at this
[06:51:14] level. If the owner thinks it's less,
[06:51:16] then that person should be the person
[06:51:17] who's running marketing. If somebody
[06:51:19] else thinks the product needs to be this
[06:51:20] good and someone else thinks it be less,
[06:51:22] that person should be in charge, whether
[06:51:23] it's their first day or the thousandth
[06:51:25] day. The person who has the highest
[06:51:27] standards is the one who should be
[06:51:28] making the decision. They should become
[06:51:29] source. And so when you get to that
[06:51:31] level, the only person you're making
[06:51:32] trade-offs with is yourself. You're the
[06:51:34] one who's determining
[06:51:36] is this good enough for me to put my
[06:51:39] name on rather than is this good enough
[06:51:41] for them to say it's good. And for
[06:51:43] example, J.R.R. Tolkien worked on The
[06:51:46] Hobbit for a decade and he didn't even
[06:51:49] submit the draft. One of his friends saw
[06:51:51] that he had been working on it for a
[06:51:52] decade and submitted it, grabbed it from
[06:51:53] his desk and submitted it for him to a
[06:51:55] publisher and then it obviously became
[06:51:57] The Hobbit and and everything came after
[06:51:59] that. And so his standards were so high
[06:52:02] that he still didn't even think it was
[06:52:04] ready, but it was still so good that
[06:52:05] they ended up releasing it. Now, many of
[06:52:06] you think that you are J.R. Tolken. But
[06:52:08] most of you were not. It's actually just
[06:52:10] very bad. And so once you realize how
[06:52:13] high your standards really have to be in
[06:52:15] order to be excellent, what you then
[06:52:17] have this daunting realization is that
[06:52:20] you can only do two to four things
[06:52:24] in your whole life because of how long
[06:52:26] it really takes to get to there. And so
[06:52:29] it's like I want to be the best author
[06:52:31] in the world. That's not a desire of
[06:52:33] mine to be clear. But if I wanted to be
[06:52:34] the best author in the world that I know
[06:52:36] that that's going to take at least a
[06:52:37] decade of actually working hard every
[06:52:40] single day to get better. And believing
[06:52:42] that for me because I'm special, I
[06:52:44] should somehow be able to be my first
[06:52:46] book is an overnight success. And and
[06:52:48] and and that is the thing that chains
[06:52:50] you to mediocrity. It's believing that
[06:52:52] it should be a different way rather than
[06:52:53] accepting reality as it is and then
[06:52:55] changing your actions as a consequence.
[06:52:56] And so this is also why lazy people
[06:53:00] distract themselves
[06:53:04] because distraction
[06:53:08] makes you believe the lie that you can
[06:53:10] try a hundred things and then figure out
[06:53:12] which one works when the reality any of
[06:53:14] them can work but none of them will work
[06:53:16] unless you pick one to work on and then
[06:53:18] that is you making it work. The vast
[06:53:21] majority of things with enough iteration
[06:53:23] can become success. It's just that
[06:53:24] people underestimate how many iterations
[06:53:25] they need to have. It's 19 drafts, not
[06:53:28] two. It's 500 minutes of editing to make
[06:53:31] the video, not 50. It's making a,000
[06:53:35] phone calls every week for two years,
[06:53:39] not two months. And so, most of the
[06:53:42] times, it's just that our level of
[06:53:44] understanding, it's it's here. And this
[06:53:47] is where a lot of people get stuck. A
[06:53:48] lot of people get stuck here. They say,
[06:53:50] "I should be better. This should be
[06:53:52] easier. I've already paid a little bit.
[06:53:54] I said I was willing to pay 30. The Nike
[06:53:56] store owner won't give me the shoes. And
[06:53:58] then you basically are the same as this
[06:54:00] person. You just have a price at that. I
[06:54:01] should I should. It should be. I
[06:54:03] deserve. I am worth.
[06:54:06] Takes what it takes. It costs what it
[06:54:07] costs. You got to be willing to make the
[06:54:08] trade. No matter what your goal is, you
[06:54:10] will suffer to achieve it. So, pick a
[06:54:12] goal big enough. It's worth suffering
[06:54:14] for. Here's how to achieve that goal.
[06:54:16] Give me the next 30 minutes and I'll
[06:54:18] help you make the most of your 20s and
[06:54:19] your 30s. So, I made my first million
[06:54:21] when I was 26. A decade later, my
[06:54:23] portfolio companies generated last year
[06:54:24] over $250 million in aggregate revenue.
[06:54:27] And I'm 36 now. And so in this video,
[06:54:28] I'm going to give you the real world
[06:54:29] advice that I wish someone had told me
[06:54:31] much earlier. So number one is you want
[06:54:33] to take asymmetric bets. If you're under
[06:54:36] 30, you have no reason not to go 100%
[06:54:39] allin on your goals. The downside is
[06:54:42] nothing and the upside is everything. If
[06:54:44] you think about life as giving you kind
[06:54:46] of lottery tickets, right? You can
[06:54:48] scratch off a ticket and if you don't
[06:54:50] win, then what did you lose? The
[06:54:53] scratchoff ticket. But the thing is is
[06:54:54] that when you have nothing to lose, you
[06:54:56] have nothing to lose and you only have
[06:54:59] things to gain. And so the objective
[06:55:01] when you have as little as you can is to
[06:55:02] take as many shots as possible because
[06:55:05] your downside is zero, right? And so
[06:55:08] it's the only time in your career where
[06:55:09] you can take more shots than anyone
[06:55:11] else. And so the reason or the fact that
[06:55:14] people don't take shots and myself
[06:55:15] included when I was younger, I was so
[06:55:17] afraid to take a shot. But the only
[06:55:18] reason that was holding me back was the
[06:55:21] belief that other people who I don't
[06:55:23] even talk to anymore would somehow judge
[06:55:25] me as a quote failure. You never
[06:55:27] actually start from scratch ever again
[06:55:30] because every time after the first time
[06:55:32] you start from scratch, you start with
[06:55:33] an experience. So you still always net a
[06:55:36] positive. And so that's the beautiful
[06:55:38] thing about taking shots is that you
[06:55:39] either get the big win or more likely
[06:55:42] you learn something and then that
[06:55:44] learning compounds. And so the thing is
[06:55:47] is that I had a misunderstanding of how
[06:55:50] success worked which is that it's far
[06:55:51] more stacking many things on top of each
[06:55:54] other than it is nothing nothing and
[06:55:57] then something works. Right? And so if
[06:55:58] you imagine success like a bridge,
[06:56:01] right? So you're over here and you've
[06:56:03] got this chasm that you have to get
[06:56:04] across. Right? This is, you know, let's
[06:56:06] say there's alligators here and lava and
[06:56:08] all sorts of stuff, right? And then
[06:56:09] there's you over here who's got, you
[06:56:11] know, your big smiley face and you're
[06:56:12] happy and you're doing all the stuff you
[06:56:13] want. The thing is is that I thought
[06:56:15] that I just kept wanting to jump over
[06:56:17] this gap over and over again and think
[06:56:19] like if I just jumped hard enough or if
[06:56:21] I had the right opportunity, that's what
[06:56:23] would do it. But more likely than not,
[06:56:25] it's really like you install these these
[06:56:27] bricks on the path and you keep you keep
[06:56:30] walking and it's like, okay, well, I
[06:56:31] fall here. Okay, well, I'll fix this one
[06:56:33] later. And then you take a and then you
[06:56:35] you start again and then you fall here
[06:56:37] and then you fix this and you keep going
[06:56:38] and then you fall here and then you fix
[06:56:40] this and then all of a sudden you make
[06:56:42] it all the way across. And that's what
[06:56:44] it looks like or what the experience of
[06:56:46] kind of becoming the overnight success
[06:56:48] is and that's why so many people talk
[06:56:49] about it where uh it doesn't happen at
[06:56:52] all and then happens all at once. It's
[06:56:54] not that it happens all at once. The
[06:56:55] actual outcome of getting a system to
[06:56:57] work all the way through that is binary.
[06:57:00] But the process of building the system
[06:57:01] is actually very linear. I'm also not
[06:57:04] saying this from a position of um like
[06:57:06] even though I I you know I saw some
[06:57:07] success early in my career, I also
[06:57:09] started pretty early. And so I had nine
[06:57:11] failed businesses, nine before I had one
[06:57:14] that really worked. And so I bring this
[06:57:17] up to say that like I don't know what
[06:57:18] failure you're on right now. Maybe
[06:57:20] you're on zero failures, you're on one
[06:57:22] failure or two failures, but you have
[06:57:24] way more failures in you at the end of
[06:57:26] the day. Like one of the big
[06:57:26] realizations I had is that since life is
[06:57:28] an infinite game and what that means is
[06:57:31] that there are there are games where you
[06:57:32] have a defined time period and at the
[06:57:34] end you count the score, right? And then
[06:57:36] there's infinite games where the only
[06:57:38] point of the game is to keep playing the
[06:57:40] game. And so like the point of marriage
[06:57:43] is not to get married, it's to stay
[06:57:45] married. The point of health is not to
[06:57:47] get healthy, it's to stay healthy. And
[06:57:49] the point of business is not to get into
[06:57:51] business, but to stay in business. And
[06:57:53] so basically the only thing that you
[06:57:55] have to do to stay in business is to
[06:57:57] choose to continue to fight. And so once
[06:58:00] you realize that, then you realize that
[06:58:02] you become a success the moment you
[06:58:04] decide you are. Because being successful
[06:58:05] is far more about being in the game,
[06:58:07] about being in the arena. And so when
[06:58:09] you're in your 20s, what you lack in
[06:58:11] experience, you have to make up for in
[06:58:13] effort and hours. And believing
[06:58:15] otherwise leads to a life of honestly
[06:58:17] well-deserved mediocrity. So if you're
[06:58:19] hearing this, you're like, "Okay, I got
[06:58:21] it. I need to take more bets and I need
[06:58:22] to take maybe riskier bets because my
[06:58:24] downside is nothing. All right. Well,
[06:58:26] which bets do I take? So number two,
[06:58:28] don't follow your passion. So passion is
[06:58:31] vague and so it's very difficult to say
[06:58:33] I like this thing more than this thing.
[06:58:34] But what you can say is I'm better at
[06:58:36] this than that. And so passion usually
[06:58:39] then comes from competence, not creates
[06:58:43] competence. And so we usually like
[06:58:44] things that we get good at rather than
[06:58:46] getting good at things that we like,
[06:58:47] right? And so this is the thing like
[06:58:49] that I think confuses a lot of people.
[06:58:50] And so the other flip side of this is
[06:58:52] that enjoying something doesn't even
[06:58:53] guarantee that you're good at it or that
[06:58:54] you're going to be able to make money
[06:58:55] from it. And I remember my dad used to
[06:58:57] tell me when I was much younger, he
[06:58:58] said, "Listen, if I were following my
[06:58:59] passion, I'd be a bartender at a ski
[06:59:01] slope, right?" He said, "If you can just
[06:59:02] make money," he said, "The rest of your
[06:59:03] life, you can do whatever you want." And
[06:59:04] I actually think it was very practical
[06:59:06] advice for me. And I'm very grateful
[06:59:07] that I got that. But the thing is is
[06:59:08] that getting good at anything, you have
[06:59:10] to slog through this period where you're
[06:59:11] probably not going to be passionate
[06:59:12] about it because it's very boring. It's
[06:59:13] very monotonous. It's very repetitive.
[06:59:15] Right? It's it's one thing to say, "Oh,
[06:59:16] I like ping pong." It's another thing to
[06:59:17] say like I hit 500 forehands and 500
[06:59:19] backhands every morning and every night,
[06:59:20] right? It's a different level of
[06:59:22] dedication that you have to have to it.
[06:59:23] And that isn't going to be something
[06:59:24] you're passionate about. You might like
[06:59:25] playing the game, but getting good at
[06:59:26] the game are two very different things,
[06:59:28] right? And so it sets this false
[06:59:30] expectation that I think ultimately
[06:59:31] harms more people. And I think one of
[06:59:34] the biggest reasons of not following
[06:59:35] your passion is that your passions will
[06:59:37] change as you age. I promise you, the
[06:59:40] things that I was passionate about when
[06:59:40] I was 20 is not things I'm passion about
[06:59:42] now. And I'm sure that things I'm
[06:59:43] passionate about when I'm in my mid and
[06:59:44] late 40s are going to be different than
[06:59:45] things I'm now. Same as 50s and 60s. And
[06:59:47] so this idea that like I have to find
[06:59:49] this one thing, it puts a ton of
[06:59:50] pressure on that thing that it has to be
[06:59:52] perfect forever. And if it's not going
[06:59:53] to be perfect forever, then why don't we
[06:59:55] be practical now so that we can give
[06:59:57] ourselves options later. So
[06:59:58] fundamentally, all we're going to look
[07:00:00] for are things that you're good at that
[07:00:02] people already spend money on because
[07:00:04] that creates a very high likelihood
[07:00:06] outcome of you creating something that
[07:00:08] you can exchange in the marketplace.
[07:00:09] Once you've decided on something that
[07:00:11] you want to get better at, you're
[07:00:11] already good at it. You want to get
[07:00:12] better at it, which is hopefully, you
[07:00:14] know, maybe it is your passion, which be
[07:00:15] amazing, but a lot of times it's not.
[07:00:17] The next thing is you have to get good
[07:00:18] at one thing.
[07:00:20] Think about the equal opposite of this.
[07:00:22] How would I get someone to be poor? I
[07:00:24] would get them to keep starting new
[07:00:26] things rather than getting good at one
[07:00:28] thing. And so, do you remember that guy
[07:00:30] who got rich dropshipping, day trading,
[07:00:33] buying crypto, and wholesaling all at
[07:00:35] the same time? Yeah. Me neither. You
[07:00:37] have to focus. And it's arrogant to
[07:00:39] think that you can do multiple things at
[07:00:40] once and beat someone who does one thing
[07:00:42] with all their effort. You have to pick
[07:00:44] one thing and go allin and then you
[07:00:46] become the one who's hard to beat. So I
[07:00:48] told you earlier that I had nine failed
[07:00:50] businesses. Now here's the part that a
[07:00:51] lot of people don't know. Six of those I
[07:00:53] had at the same time. And so I like to
[07:00:55] tell people, oh yeah, I'm a CEO. I've
[07:00:57] got multiple companies, right? Like kind
[07:00:59] of the way I do now. But it's very
[07:01:01] different now because the thing is is
[07:01:02] that I actually have CEOs who run those
[07:01:04] businesses, right? Not me. Because you
[07:01:06] can only be CEO of one thing. You can
[07:01:08] only drive one thing. Now
[07:01:10] IDriveacquisquisition.com,
[07:01:12] right? But CEOs of each of the divisions
[07:01:14] of each of the portfolio companies, like
[07:01:15] those are people who run their own
[07:01:16] profit and loss statements. And I didn't
[07:01:18] understand that. And so I had a
[07:01:20] chiropractor agency, a dental agency, a
[07:01:22] gym launch business where we did
[07:01:23] turnarounds. I And then I also had five
[07:01:26] gyms of my own at the time. All right?
[07:01:28] Depending on how you want to describe
[07:01:29] it, I had five locations plus the three.
[07:01:30] So I had eight. It's a lot. All right?
[07:01:32] It was too much. And because of that, I
[07:01:34] was stressed out of my mind. I was so
[07:01:36] spread thin and basically I had lots of
[07:01:38] things that generated revenue and I
[07:01:40] didn't make any money. The only thing
[07:01:41] that it fed was my ego, not my bank
[07:01:43] account. When did this big turnaround
[07:01:45] happen for me? Leila came into my life
[07:01:46] and she was like, "Hey, you're clearly
[07:01:48] really good at this one thing. Why don't
[07:01:50] we just cut everything else?" And that's
[07:01:52] exactly what I did. It was the hardest
[07:01:54] period of my life cuz I had to shut down
[07:01:55] all the other businesses but one, which
[07:01:56] also meant that I had to end
[07:01:57] partnerships with all these different
[07:01:59] other people that were relying on me.
[07:02:01] And that was hard. I'm not going to lie.
[07:02:02] Like it was not fun. Like these are
[07:02:04] people that I liked. But I had to make
[07:02:06] this decision. I had to cut off the life
[07:02:08] that I didn't want to have the life I
[07:02:10] wanted. If you want to impress people
[07:02:12] who are poor, talk about how many things
[07:02:14] you do. If you want to impress people
[07:02:16] who are rich, talk about how good you
[07:02:18] are at one thing. Like, at the end of
[07:02:19] the day, your ability to demonstrate
[07:02:22] excellence is going to be the only thing
[07:02:24] that someone who is ahead of you will
[07:02:26] look at. And so, you only fool the
[07:02:28] people who have no idea. And I'll be
[07:02:30] real, there's a lot of people who have
[07:02:31] no idea. So the thing is is that this is
[07:02:33] where the whole imposttor syndrome will
[07:02:35] start creeping up on you because you're
[07:02:37] like man I you know I kind of feel like
[07:02:38] a little bit of imposter because you are
[07:02:40] you're misrepresenting yourself. You
[07:02:42] know you're not as successful as you
[07:02:43] pretend to be. And so if you want to
[07:02:45] eliminate imposter syndrome just stop
[07:02:47] lying. When I say lying people like I
[07:02:48] don't lie. If you present something in a
[07:02:50] way that you know is going to be
[07:02:51] perceived differently than what reality
[07:02:53] is posturing in my opinion lying. You're
[07:02:56] misrepresenting. What you want to be
[07:02:57] able to do is state the facts and tell
[07:02:59] the truth. Period. And then if those
[07:03:01] facts and truth are not compelling and
[07:03:02] do not get you status, then change the
[07:03:05] facts and change the truth. Meaning not
[07:03:07] that you lie about them, but you work so
[07:03:09] hard that the truth is compelling. And
[07:03:11] sometimes that takes time. But I promise
[07:03:12] you, the people who are who are all in
[07:03:14] only on the imposter stuff, the guys
[07:03:15] that I knew that are that were, you
[07:03:16] know, when I was in my 20s who were kind
[07:03:18] of like hustle bros, whatever, a lot of
[07:03:20] those guys faded, you know, and or
[07:03:22] they're still like jumping from thing to
[07:03:23] thing to thing, kind of like pretending
[07:03:24] to be successful, but like I know that
[07:03:27] they're barely able to afford their
[07:03:28] house. At the end of the day, it's a
[07:03:29] choice that you have to make. Do I want
[07:03:31] to pretend to be rich? Do I want to
[07:03:33] pretend to be successful? Do I want to
[07:03:34] look like I'm successful? Or do I want
[07:03:36] to be successful, which more likely is
[07:03:38] do the things that success requires,
[07:03:40] which today do not look like success. It
[07:03:42] looks like a very long string of
[07:03:44] failures. Because you will be
[07:03:45] [clears throat] rewarded far more in
[07:03:46] life for your determination than your
[07:03:48] intelligence. But the problem with
[07:03:50] determination is is that in the short
[07:03:52] term, it looks like a long string of
[07:03:54] failures until it works. Okay? So,
[07:03:56] you're like, "Got it. I'm going to
[07:03:57] focus." Now, let me give you something
[07:03:58] that's going to help you stay focused.
[07:04:00] Number four, stop networking. All right?
[07:04:02] Now, this is a really, really important
[07:04:04] point. Now, it's not that I even have
[07:04:06] some big problem with networking
[07:04:07] overall. That's actually not my point.
[07:04:09] It's more that there are there are
[07:04:11] seasons of life, right? In the
[07:04:13] beginning, you're in exploration. I
[07:04:15] grabbed this from Nval and I really love
[07:04:16] it. Later on, you get into exploitation,
[07:04:19] which is where you go allin, right? And
[07:04:21] so, the thing is is that in the
[07:04:22] beginning, you're tasting lots of stuff.
[07:04:24] you're trying to figure out what you are
[07:04:26] good at or have some proclivity towards.
[07:04:29] When you have that proclivity, then it
[07:04:30] becomes very clear now is the time to
[07:04:33] cut everything else so that we can focus
[07:04:35] and go deep. Right? So, you go broad in
[07:04:37] the beginning so that you can figure out
[07:04:39] what you to go deep on. The broad period
[07:04:41] that you're in is never the period where
[07:04:43] you're going to make money. Like this is
[07:04:44] the part you have to get. I say from the
[07:04:46] beginning of when I started until I
[07:04:47] really graduated from it was about 5
[07:04:49] years. It's less of a binary, more of a
[07:04:52] continuum. In the beginning, you taste
[07:04:53] lots of stuff and then you just have to
[07:04:54] because in the beginning, you have to
[07:04:55] say yes to things. You have to say yes
[07:04:56] because you're so bad. You're so scared.
[07:04:58] You never want to say yes. But you learn
[07:05:00] to say yes a little bit and then you say
[07:05:02] yes more and then you say yes more. And
[07:05:03] then very quickly you learn to say yes
[07:05:05] and get overwhelmed. And so the only way
[07:05:07] out of this yes trap is you have to
[07:05:09] start practicing to say no. And if
[07:05:11] you're like, wait a second, that means
[07:05:12] that I have to change what I do. Welcome
[07:05:14] to entrepreneurship. Like you have to
[07:05:16] learn, you have to evolve, you have to
[07:05:17] grow. So let me give you a very tactical
[07:05:19] example. So, if you're debating between
[07:05:20] going to a networking event, right, or
[07:05:22] like a lunch with some dude who's like,
[07:05:24] "Hey, we should collaborate. We should
[07:05:25] synergize. We should maybe trade ideas.
[07:05:27] Let me pick your brain, whatever, right?
[07:05:28] And if you're picking between any of
[07:05:30] those things and working, choose the
[07:05:32] work because when the work works out,
[07:05:34] the people will still be there to take
[07:05:36] your call. But if you never do the work,
[07:05:39] no amount of networking will get the
[07:05:41] work done for you." And the bonus or
[07:05:43] negative bonus here is that if you don't
[07:05:44] get the work done, they're not going to
[07:05:46] take your call in the future. And so
[07:05:47] they're willing to take the call today
[07:05:48] with whatever small amount of success
[07:05:50] that you have. But if you lose that
[07:05:51] success because you get distracted,
[07:05:53] they're not going to take the call in
[07:05:54] the future. That door will be open. I
[07:05:56] promise. And not only will that door be
[07:05:58] open, 100 other doors will open for you
[07:06:00] if you win. During this season, losers
[07:06:03] congregate. Winners isolate. If everyone
[07:06:06] was supposed to win, they would have
[07:06:07] made podiums bigger. The top of the
[07:06:09] mountain isn't supposed to fit a lot of
[07:06:10] people. It's normal. The air is harder
[07:06:12] to breathe. And the thing is is if all
[07:06:14] of this seems antithetical or different
[07:06:16] than what you've heard or what other
[07:06:17] people around you are experiencing, ask
[07:06:19] yourself, is that do those people have
[07:06:21] the lives you want? A great way to make
[07:06:23] a mistake is to ask someone else's idea
[07:06:27] about your idea who has no idea. When
[07:06:30] you make this transition from going from
[07:06:32] the exploration period to the
[07:06:34] exploitation phase, you go from many
[07:06:37] looser connections to a very few tight
[07:06:39] ones. I tend to be very transactional as
[07:06:41] a person, but I think we all are and
[07:06:43] some people are just open about it.
[07:06:44] Everybody on some level does some sort
[07:06:46] of math in their head of like the
[07:06:47] person, this person in my life, I get
[07:06:48] more benefits than I have costs. But the
[07:06:50] thing is is that if you want to raise
[07:06:51] the standard of your life, you have to
[07:06:52] raise the standard of the people who you
[07:06:54] surround yourself with. Because the
[07:06:55] fastest way to change your life is to
[07:06:57] change who you're friends with. Because
[07:06:59] that reference group is ultimately going
[07:07:01] to be what you compare yourself to. And
[07:07:03] so if you change who you compare
[07:07:04] yourself to, all of a sudden you will
[07:07:06] create deprivation around the difference
[07:07:07] between where they're at and where
[07:07:09] you're at. The only way that people let
[07:07:11] you into circles that you don't deserve
[07:07:12] to be in is work ethic. There is no
[07:07:14] other way. It is the universal currency
[07:07:16] of respect across cultures, across time
[07:07:18] periods, across cohorts, across
[07:07:20] generations. An old man will respect a
[07:07:22] young man who hustles and they will
[07:07:24] always be willing to give time to
[07:07:26] somebody who they think will execute.
[07:07:27] Like this is that was my secret and it
[07:07:30] still is my secret. Like I I network
[07:07:31] with people who are above who you know I
[07:07:33] punch above my weight class in terms of
[07:07:34] the people that I'm connected with
[07:07:35] because they know that I'll do the work
[07:07:37] and so they don't feel like they're
[07:07:38] wasting their time by helping cuz the
[07:07:39] thing is a lot of people are actually
[07:07:40] very happy to help you. What they aren't
[07:07:42] happy to do is waste their time helping
[07:07:45] you when you actually don't help
[07:07:46] yourself. And so I've shed friends at
[07:07:48] every season of my life and my close
[07:07:51] circle has always been very small like
[07:07:53] very small. The thing is is that I think
[07:07:55] of my life in kind of seasons, right?
[07:07:57] And so you're going to have friends for
[07:07:58] this season and maybe you keep them for
[07:08:00] life but maybe you don't. And I think
[07:08:02] giving yourself permission to say like
[07:08:03] that was that season and they were
[07:08:05] amazing friends for the objectives that
[07:08:06] I had then and then my objectives change
[07:08:08] and it's not really fair to them to say
[07:08:09] hey I'm completely changing all the
[07:08:11] things that I'm doing. You have to still
[07:08:12] be friends with me. It might not make
[07:08:13] sense for them. And so not keeping this
[07:08:16] expectation over them has helped me kind
[07:08:17] of like free myself of that so that I
[07:08:19] can reinvest the time that I have in
[07:08:21] friends that I think will help me get to
[07:08:23] where I'm trying to go next. Okay. So,
[07:08:24] if we're taking these big bets and we're
[07:08:26] we're following something that we're
[07:08:28] good at rather than that we're
[07:08:29] passionate about and we're not going to
[07:08:30] get distracted, we're doubling down on
[07:08:32] one thing and we're turning off these
[07:08:34] other things that in the beginning we
[07:08:35] were exploring the the little lunches,
[07:08:37] the little networking because we know
[07:08:38] that if we just succeed at this one
[07:08:39] thing, all of those doors will be open.
[07:08:41] What do we do to make money? So, let me
[07:08:42] give you a money rule. Money loves
[07:08:45] speed. And this will relate back to the
[07:08:48] asymmetric bets. By the time you have
[07:08:50] all the information, the opportunity is
[07:08:52] gone. Sometimes you just have to make
[07:08:54] your bet. And it's almost always faster
[07:08:56] to make a decision, then make a mistake,
[07:08:59] and then correct that mistake than it is
[07:09:01] to painstakingly deliberate on the
[07:09:03] decision. If you know how long it would
[07:09:05] take you to fix something, if you're
[07:09:06] wrong, then just make your best bet cuz
[07:09:09] you can always fix it later. And so said
[07:09:11] differently, if it takes you 5 minutes
[07:09:13] to decide and then 10 minutes to fix
[07:09:15] something, don't take two hours to
[07:09:17] decide because you could just do it. And
[07:09:19] if you're right, you immediately are
[07:09:20] moving forward 5 minutes later. And if
[07:09:22] you're wrong, you're moving forward 15
[07:09:23] minutes later. But either way, it's
[07:09:25] going to take you less time than trying
[07:09:26] to assume that you're going to know
[07:09:27] everything because you're just not. You
[07:09:28] have to get a grip with uncertainty.
[07:09:30] Like uncertainty is the job. Like, if
[07:09:33] you want certainty, don't try and go
[07:09:35] after your dreams. Because the thing is
[07:09:36] is that the only way to go after a
[07:09:38] certain dream is to go after an old
[07:09:39] dream. And if you go after an old dream
[07:09:40] that's already happened, you're trying
[07:09:41] to fulfill something that will not
[07:09:43] happen again. And so, you're either
[07:09:44] going to do the work or you're going to
[07:09:46] sit around wishing you'd done the work.
[07:09:48] And one of the things that took me a
[07:09:49] very long time to to understand was that
[07:09:51] the things that dragged me down were not
[07:09:53] the things that I thought they were.
[07:09:54] Because the heaviest things in life
[07:09:56] aren't iron or gold, but they are unmade
[07:09:58] decisions. They're the things that weigh
[07:10:00] us down. They take up all of our
[07:10:02] attention, all of our brain power. And
[07:10:04] so, right now, there's probably a
[07:10:06] handful of decisions that you know you
[07:10:07] need to make that you're just not. If
[07:10:09] you want to feel yourself go so much
[07:10:11] faster than you ever have, just decide.
[07:10:14] So few decisions in life actually are
[07:10:16] irreversible. Even the ones that people
[07:10:18] pretend are irreversible. What if I
[07:10:20] should I buy this car? Should I buy this
[07:10:22] car? You could buy it and then flip it.
[07:10:23] It's not like you can't sell it again,
[07:10:25] right? And so the real cost of the
[07:10:26] decision is the delta between what I
[07:10:28] could buy it for and what I can sell it
[07:10:29] for. Okay. Well, how much does it cost
[07:10:31] me waiting 6 months to do this? Probably
[07:10:33] a lot. And if I need that car to to, you
[07:10:36] know, or a truck so that I can like go
[07:10:37] to job sites or pick up clients or
[07:10:39] whatever it is, then like I am losing
[07:10:41] all of the time that I'm waiting to
[07:10:43] decide. And I'm telling you where people
[07:10:46] slow down is at the decision process
[07:10:48] more than at the doing process. Doing
[07:10:50] usually takes very little time. It's the
[07:10:52] deciding that people that bogs people
[07:10:53] down in quagmire, right? They just get
[07:10:55] stuck. They they feel like they're
[07:10:57] trudging through mud because they just
[07:10:58] hit these walls and all of a sudden
[07:11:00] there's no action because they're just
[07:11:01] thinking, they're planning. And I think
[07:11:03] I had to get comfortable with the idea
[07:11:04] that there's so many variables that I do
[07:11:07] not know. That I actually have to get
[07:11:08] comfortable with the idea that I just
[07:11:10] should test and learn and I'll learn way
[07:11:13] faster than if I try and deliberate. And
[07:11:15] that has happened more times in my life
[07:11:16] than not. I would say that approach has
[07:11:19] served me with bigger and bigger
[07:11:20] decisions in life. Like I have I've made
[07:11:22] monster mistakes, but the bigger mistake
[07:11:24] that I would have made is just not being
[07:11:25] able to make decisions to begin with.
[07:11:27] And so you can move through life at
[07:11:29] seven times the rate of other people by
[07:11:31] simply changing when you say you're
[07:11:33] going to make a decision from the end of
[07:11:35] the week to the end of the day. And if
[07:11:37] you want to move even faster than that,
[07:11:38] you can decide at the end of the hour.
[07:11:40] And if you move faster than that, guess
[07:11:41] what you could do? Decide now. And so
[07:11:43] sometimes like my team has seen me do
[07:11:45] this. Well, we're like, "Okay, so um you
[07:11:47] know, we've got to we got to make this
[07:11:48] decision." And people are always like,
[07:11:49] "Yeah, let's kick that to next, you
[07:11:51] know, meeting or let's let's circle
[07:11:52] back. Let's let's go offline for that."
[07:11:54] It's like, "No, let's confront. Let's
[07:11:55] just choose. Let's pick. Which vendor
[07:11:57] are we going with? Which website design
[07:11:59] do we like? What headline are we going
[07:12:00] to use? What's the ad hook that we're
[07:12:02] going to go with? Just pick. That's why
[07:12:04] all of this stuff comes down to bets. If
[07:12:06] you want to have a future that you want,
[07:12:08] you have to get comfortable with risk.
[07:12:10] So, if money loves speed, where are some
[07:12:12] of the money potholes? So, number six,
[07:12:14] pay off your debt. Now, I'm going to hit
[07:12:17] you with something you probably haven't
[07:12:18] thought of before, which is there are
[07:12:19] many kinds of debt. There's obviously
[07:12:21] financial debt, but the biggest and most
[07:12:23] expensive debt is ignorance debt. It's
[07:12:25] the cost of what you do not know but
[07:12:27] should. And to be clear, I still pay off
[07:12:30] ignorance debt every day. It's the debt
[07:12:32] in skills and knowledge that I should
[07:12:34] know to get faster and further to where
[07:12:37] I'm trying to go, but I don't. And so, I
[07:12:39] have to just fail until I get this
[07:12:41] knowledge. But the thing is is that if I
[07:12:43] don't fail, I will never get it. I am
[07:12:45] willing to pay in looking bad, in money
[07:12:48] lost, in time lost, in people judging me
[07:12:52] to make bets. And so I like this
[07:12:54] perspective on experts, which is that an
[07:12:56] expert is just somebody who's made all
[07:12:57] the mistakes you can make in a very
[07:12:58] narrow field. You have to learn how to
[07:13:00] lose before you can learn how to win.
[07:13:03] And the first rule of losing is that you
[07:13:05] didn't lose, you just learned. You paid
[07:13:07] down the most expensive debt. So then
[07:13:09] the question is, if you know that you
[07:13:10] have to pay this debt off, why aren't
[07:13:12] you? And I think it's because you don't
[07:13:14] realize how expensive not paying it off
[07:13:16] really is. And so know the price of
[07:13:20] inaction. Do you think that the reason
[07:13:22] that you're in the situation you're in
[07:13:24] right now is because you've struggled to
[07:13:25] decide in the past that you've gotten
[07:13:27] all the way up to the edge, you've
[07:13:28] gotten all the way up to the precipice,
[07:13:29] all the way to the front of the line,
[07:13:30] and then you choose not to. And so the
[07:13:32] question is, how many times have you run
[07:13:34] that cycle? How many times have you
[07:13:35] thought through this decision and then
[07:13:37] not done something about it? And is the
[07:13:38] life you have you want as a result of
[07:13:40] those actions? Because maybe the best
[07:13:42] thing you can possibly do is maybe see
[07:13:44] this and then just choose to make that
[07:13:46] call because not making that call has
[07:13:47] gotten you where you're at. If you
[07:13:49] genuinely believe that you're going to
[07:13:50] do this sooner or later, right? Make
[07:13:52] this bet, make this call, whatever,
[07:13:53] sooner or later, then you might as well
[07:13:55] do it sooner so you can start enjoying
[07:13:57] the benefits now cuz you're going to
[07:13:58] enjoy the benefits either way. But why
[07:14:00] would you want to delay the benefits of
[07:14:02] taking action? The real real is because
[07:14:03] you want to delay the costs of potential
[07:14:06] failure. Real quick, I have the most
[07:14:07] amazing offer for you, which is all
[07:14:10] three of my books for free. Uh,
[07:14:13] [clears throat] just cover the shipping.
[07:14:14] I think it's like five or six bucks in
[07:14:15] shipping uh per book. um you get the
[07:14:18] actual hardback shipped to you. And the
[07:14:20] reason for that is because some of you
[07:14:21] guys may know we had 3.6 million copies
[07:14:23] that were donated from entrepreneurs.
[07:14:25] And I'm doing my part to give the books
[07:14:27] away, but I'm also giving the other two
[07:14:29] books uh to anyone who want them who
[07:14:32] choose to redeem it. All right. Last
[07:14:33] time I made this offer, uh it sold out
[07:14:36] in like 10 days. Uh so I did buy a lot
[07:14:38] more books. Um so if you see this, you
[07:14:40] know, go check it out. Go grab them. Um
[07:14:41] these are obviously while supplies last.
[07:14:43] um because this lives in the video
[07:14:45] forever and if you get there and it's
[07:14:47] not there then you know don't get upset.
[07:14:48] All right, back to the video. Let's say
[07:14:51] you have a reason why you haven't taken
[07:14:53] action, whatever that is, right? Just
[07:14:55] imagine in your mind like it's some
[07:14:56] visual thing. Realistically, it's
[07:14:58] probably one or two voices in your head
[07:15:01] and you can probably think about whose
[07:15:03] voice that is and it might not be yours.
[07:15:05] And so, who is the person that you're
[07:15:08] choosing to not live your entire life
[07:15:09] for? Whose judgment do you care that
[07:15:11] much about? And so I will tell you the
[07:15:13] story. I almost didn't sell Gym Launch
[07:15:16] because I thought that $46 million was
[07:15:18] not enough to impress a specific
[07:15:21] colleague of mine. Real talk. I was very
[07:15:23] very hesitant to sell the company. And
[07:15:25] the main reason is cuz I thought that
[07:15:26] they would think that that wasn't that
[07:15:28] that impressive. And when I thought
[07:15:29] about that, I was like, "Wow." I was
[07:15:32] like, and this is this wasn't family.
[07:15:34] This wasn't friends. This was just kind
[07:15:36] of a colleague that I respected. when I
[07:15:38] was able to really listen to the voice,
[07:15:40] whose voice does this belong to and what
[07:15:43] are they saying? And most importantly,
[07:15:45] is that the person who I want to give
[07:15:47] control over my entire life? And once I
[07:15:49] saw that, I was like, well, that's
[07:15:50] ridiculous. I don't care about this.
[07:15:52] They're usually subconscious. Like, you
[07:15:54] don't notice them unless you listen for
[07:15:55] the voice, unless you name the voice. Am
[07:15:57] I really going to let John be the reason
[07:15:59] that I don't get married to this girl?
[07:16:00] Is Joe really going to be the reason
[07:16:02] that I don't raise my prices? Is Sarah
[07:16:05] really the reason why I'm not going to
[07:16:06] sell this thing? Ridiculous. But people
[07:16:08] do it, myself included, every day. And
[07:16:10] look, this isn't going to be easy,
[07:16:12] right? Building these skills, losing
[07:16:15] friends, taking bets, taking losses, you
[07:16:17] might find yourself stuck and then
[07:16:19] blaming your previous experiences. Which
[07:16:21] is why number eight, get over yourself.
[07:16:25] Everyone's childhood was difficult. Get
[07:16:27] over it. And if you want to win the
[07:16:28] award for hardest childhood,
[07:16:30] congratulations. I'll give it to you.
[07:16:31] You have the hardest childhood. You win.
[07:16:33] Feel better, right? No one cares about
[07:16:35] what happened to you then. only what you
[07:16:37] can make happen now. And so the only
[07:16:39] person that's satisfied with whatever
[07:16:40] that reason is is you. And the everyone
[07:16:42] else calls that reason an excuse. And at
[07:16:45] the end of the day age, you want to get
[07:16:46] to your life and have everyone be like,
[07:16:47] you know what, he wasn't successful, but
[07:16:49] he had a lot of really good reasons.
[07:16:50] Wouldn't it be so much more powerful to
[07:16:52] say he had all these reasons he
[07:16:53] shouldn't have been successful but was
[07:16:55] anyways? Like those reasons actually
[07:16:57] give you even more fuel because you
[07:16:59] become a stronger story to everyone
[07:17:02] else. Like no one cares when the silver
[07:17:04] spoon kid succeeds really. And so all of
[07:17:06] the reasons that you can normally tell
[07:17:08] yourself of why you shouldn't do it are
[07:17:09] sometimes the best reasons of why you
[07:17:11] should. If you had disadvantages, I
[07:17:13] agree with you. Like you're right. It's
[07:17:15] harder to be successful if this thing
[07:17:16] happened to you or if you're born with X
[07:17:19] or you're in this gender or this race or
[07:17:21] you have this birth deformity or you
[07:17:23] speak a different language or you're
[07:17:24] born in a different country or you had
[07:17:25] abuse, whatever. So the main point is
[07:17:28] despite the disadvantage, you only have
[07:17:30] one choice. What are you going to do?
[07:17:32] You can take action anyway and become
[07:17:34] proof to other people like you, your
[07:17:36] people who were also born into your
[07:17:38] situation, whether it was abuse, whether
[07:17:39] it was your gender, whether it was your
[07:17:41] your race, whe your country, and you can
[07:17:43] prove to them or prove to yourself that
[07:17:45] you can overcome it and that they can
[07:17:46] overcome it too. Or you can do what the
[07:17:48] vast majority of people do, is that they
[07:17:50] protect their ego and blame and
[07:17:52] complain. And to be clear, this is not a
[07:17:54] pulpit. You can do whatever you want. I
[07:17:55] support your choice. Go you. But only
[07:17:57] one of those decisions is going to make
[07:17:58] you better. And likely only one of those
[07:18:00] decisions is going to get you closer to
[07:18:01] where you want to go. Because at the end
[07:18:02] of the day, here's the TLDDR. Losers
[07:18:04] define themselves by what has happened
[07:18:06] to them. Winners define themselves by
[07:18:08] what they can make happen despite what's
[07:18:10] happened to them. And so where some
[07:18:12] person sees an excuse, another person
[07:18:13] sees an origin story. Like you look at
[07:18:15] every every champion, every hero, every
[07:18:18] comic book, they all have hard pasts.
[07:18:21] And so you having a hard past, whatever
[07:18:23] that is for you or some disadvantage,
[07:18:26] just makes you like every other
[07:18:27] superhero who ends up, you know,
[07:18:29] changing their lives. And I actually
[07:18:30] love this. I heard this from Joe Rogan,
[07:18:31] so this is not mine. Every single one of
[07:18:33] us can today wake up like it's the first
[07:18:35] day of a video game. Like you just like
[07:18:37] got transported into this body and
[07:18:39] you're like, "Okay, look around. I have
[07:18:41] a wife. I have some kids. I have a job I
[07:18:43] hate or I have a business I don't like
[07:18:45] or I have some bet that I I have this
[07:18:47] thing inside of me that I I know I can
[07:18:48] do more but I'm not. you have all this
[07:18:50] stuff that's around you and now you can
[07:18:52] choose like everything else behind you.
[07:18:54] You could just have today be your spawn
[07:18:56] point. And so when you're in a video
[07:18:57] game, it's easy to just forsake all that
[07:18:59] stuff because you don't have this
[07:19:00] emotional connection to it. But the
[07:19:01] thing is is that like the action needs
[07:19:03] to be taken either way. So whatever
[07:19:04] frame of mind you need to be in in order
[07:19:06] to do it, then do that. All right. So
[07:19:07] once we have this head trash out of the
[07:19:09] way, then we have to get back to back to
[07:19:10] business, if you will. So what's the
[07:19:12] next thing that we have to do? We have
[07:19:14] to solve bigger problems.
[07:19:16] If you want to make more money in your
[07:19:18] 20s and 30s, solve bigger problems.
[07:19:20] Right? If you want to make a million
[07:19:22] dollars, you have to be willing to
[07:19:23] endure a million dollars worth of pain.
[07:19:25] If you want to make $10 million, you
[07:19:26] have to endure $10 million worth of
[07:19:28] pain. And here's the thing is that most
[07:19:30] people have never endured that. And so
[07:19:31] when they start getting into it, the
[07:19:32] thing is is that the nature of the pain
[07:19:34] changes. And so in the beginning, the
[07:19:36] pain is I don't know what I'm doing.
[07:19:38] Later the pain is people judging me. And
[07:19:40] later the pain is lawsuits. And a lot of
[07:19:43] the pain is just not knowing what the
[07:19:45] hell you're doing at whatever stage of
[07:19:46] business you're at because that never
[07:19:48] goes away. And so not knowing is a
[07:19:51] constant. So trying to solve for not
[07:19:53] knowing is silly cuz it's never going to
[07:19:55] happen. And so this is why you have to
[07:19:57] get comfortable with uncertainty. You
[07:19:58] have to make uncertainty your friend. If
[07:20:00] we're going to solve problems, right, we
[07:20:02] might as well pick big ones. And I'll
[07:20:03] give you a great a great analogy that I
[07:20:05] got from Steven Schwarzman who's the
[07:20:06] founder of Blackstone. He said big goals
[07:20:08] and small goals are usually just about
[07:20:10] as hard. A common VC saying is that
[07:20:13] having a really successful restaurant,
[07:20:14] you might have to work 80 hours a week
[07:20:16] and manage all these different people to
[07:20:18] have a really successful local
[07:20:19] restaurant. And you might also have to
[07:20:21] manage all these people and do all this
[07:20:23] other stuff if you want to build a
[07:20:25] billion-dollar unicorn. Both of those
[07:20:27] things are hard. And so if it's going to
[07:20:28] be hard regardless, you might as well go
[07:20:31] big. And actually, it's been a very like
[07:20:33] that is a very helpful frame for me
[07:20:34] because one of the beliefs that I have
[07:20:35] about business and life is that
[07:20:37] suffering is a constant. Like I have to
[07:20:39] remind myself this on a regular basis,
[07:20:41] which is that if we are growing, I am in
[07:20:43] pain. If we're plateaued, I am in pain.
[07:20:46] And if we are declining, I'm in pain.
[07:20:47] [clears throat] Which means that I am
[07:20:48] pretty much always in pain. And so to
[07:20:50] think that there's something wrong with
[07:20:52] pain misses the point of how this works.
[07:20:55] It is a constant. And if it's a
[07:20:56] constant, we don't even need to think
[07:20:58] about it. It shouldn't be a reason to do
[07:20:59] something or not do something cuz it's
[07:21:00] just always there. Competition for big
[07:21:03] goals, believe it or not, is actually
[07:21:04] much rarer. It's thinner air. People
[07:21:06] believe that it's so unrealistic that
[07:21:08] they don't shoot for it, which actually
[07:21:10] makes fewer people there to compete
[07:21:11] against. And so, it is probably harder
[07:21:13] in some ways to have a local restaurant
[07:21:15] that is really successful than it is to
[07:21:17] have a, you know, big business. And what
[07:21:20] I found is that most problems are
[07:21:22] solvable, which means that most things
[07:21:24] are knowable. And the reason that you
[07:21:26] probably haven't gotten to where you
[07:21:28] want to go is cuz you haven't actually
[07:21:30] started trying it. And so, you're going
[07:21:32] to have to be obsessive about it. And I
[07:21:34] think one of the big things that I
[07:21:35] didn't understand was just how obsessive
[07:21:37] I was going to have to be. Is normal to
[07:21:40] not be like your other normal friends.
[07:21:42] If you want to have extraordinary
[07:21:44] outcomes, if you think about the
[07:21:45] reverse, it wouldn't make sense if we do
[07:21:47] the same things as our normal friends
[07:21:48] and somehow get something different.
[07:21:49] It's a positive indicator. It's a green
[07:21:51] flag that you're living a different life
[07:21:53] than everyone around you. Like I had a
[07:21:55] conversation with my EAS this morning.
[07:21:56] They were like, "Man, I feel like if you
[07:21:58] were a normal person," that's what they
[07:21:59] said to me. They're like, "I feel like
[07:22:00] if you were a normal person, you would
[07:22:02] drive this kind of car." I like looked
[07:22:04] at them and I was like, "So basically,
[07:22:05] if I were not me, I would do things that
[07:22:08] not me would do. Right now, it would
[07:22:10] make sense that you're going to do
[07:22:12] things that normal people won't do
[07:22:14] because you're trying to not have the
[07:22:15] same outcome as them." 10. Obsession is
[07:22:19] the ticket of entry. It's the price of
[07:22:22] entry. And the thing is is that
[07:22:23] obsession isn't really obsession. It's
[07:22:25] actually just trying and no one else
[07:22:26] tries. Like that's the real real is that
[07:22:29] normal people call what I consider sane
[07:22:32] people to be obsessed. But sane people,
[07:22:35] which is what I consider myself,
[07:22:37] consider everyone else insane because
[07:22:39] they do nothing and waste their lives.
[07:22:41] And so we have to be comfortable with
[07:22:44] reasoning from first principles of like,
[07:22:46] I am only going to live here for not
[07:22:48] that long and I'm only going to have a
[07:22:49] certain amount of hours to do the stuff
[07:22:50] that I want to do. Why on earth would I
[07:22:53] not do it because of some face noise
[07:22:56] that some person, some other, you know,
[07:22:59] advanced ape is going to say to me about
[07:23:02] them having a preference about how I'm
[07:23:04] living my life. And so you can boil
[07:23:06] almost all insults or judgments down to
[07:23:10] this statement. And I think like I hear
[07:23:11] this, I translate it when I hear hate.
[07:23:13] You do not live your life in a way that
[07:23:14] I would prefer. So they're like, you
[07:23:16] know, you shouldn't. I do not live my
[07:23:17] life in a way that you would prefer. And
[07:23:18] that's okay because that's why you live
[07:23:20] a life that you prefer and not a life
[07:23:22] that I would prefer. And that's why you
[07:23:23] live your life and I live my life. And
[07:23:24] so people just get so triggered by this.
[07:23:27] So when people hate on you, it usually
[07:23:29] means that they're jealous and believe
[07:23:31] that you are undeserving of some part of
[07:23:33] your life. And so to be clear, it's not
[07:23:35] that they're jealous of your whole life.
[07:23:36] They might be jealous of the attention
[07:23:38] you get. They might be jealous of maybe
[07:23:40] just the money you make, but not the way
[07:23:41] you look. Or they might be jealous of
[07:23:42] the the body you have, right? And
[07:23:44] they're going to be like, "Ah, you're
[07:23:45] chewing to that food, right?" Or, you
[07:23:47] know, "You work too much." or whatever
[07:23:48] the whatever the little snide remark is,
[07:23:50] right? But what they basically think is
[07:23:52] that life has unjustly given you the
[07:23:55] benefits that they believe they
[07:23:56] rightfully deserve. And they might be
[07:23:58] right, but life isn't fair. Here's the
[07:24:00] thing. People who obsess about work life
[07:24:03] balance are typically mediocre at both.
[07:24:05] And so obsessed people apply their
[07:24:07] obsession to everything and just call it
[07:24:09] life. And they also don't consider
[07:24:10] themselves obsessed. They just consider
[07:24:12] everyone else unobsessed and just plain
[07:24:15] and banal. And so I get criticized all
[07:24:17] the time for work life balance. People
[07:24:19] say like, Alex, you don't have any
[07:24:20] hobbies, right? I don't want any. I
[07:24:22] don't want any. They're basically saying
[07:24:23] yet again, you live your life in a way
[07:24:25] that I would not prefer. If I were in
[07:24:26] your position, I would live life
[07:24:27] differently, right? And that's why
[07:24:28] you're not in my position. So why should
[07:24:30] I sacrifice the things that I prefer to
[07:24:31] do in order to do the things that I
[07:24:33] don't want to do, right? Just to make
[07:24:34] your definition of work life balance
[07:24:35] happy, which I don't accept. So like
[07:24:37] work life balance is a wonderful goal. I
[07:24:40] have no hate for it. It's not going to
[07:24:41] happen if you want to be the best. Like
[07:24:43] you've probably heard the, you know,
[07:24:44] work smart not hard, right? That only
[07:24:47] works when you're competing against
[07:24:48] people who are not smart. If you compete
[07:24:51] against other smart people, the only
[07:24:52] thing you will have left is to work
[07:24:54] hard. If you work smart, not hard, you
[07:24:56] will get beaten by someone who works
[07:24:57] smart and hard. And if I don't know
[07:24:59] about you, I would rather be that person
[07:25:00] cuz at the end of the day, I would like
[07:25:02] to just win. And that is point 11, which
[07:25:04] is work hard and smart. If you
[07:25:07] extrapolate out what a normal life is
[07:25:09] like, right? Maybe someone makes, you
[07:25:11] know, a million dollars or $2 million
[07:25:13] over the span of their entire career,
[07:25:14] right? 40 years plus. I think there is
[07:25:16] just a certain amount of work that must
[07:25:17] be done to generate income. And so what
[07:25:19] I would rather do is just take that 40
[07:25:20] years and just cram it into four and
[07:25:23] then have the other 36 years of my life
[07:25:26] to do whatever I want with resources far
[07:25:28] beyond what I would be able to do there.
[07:25:30] And so I remember Ila uh had this very
[07:25:33] early conversation with I think it was
[07:25:35] our first date. She said she's like I
[07:25:36] just want to help people, right? It's
[07:25:37] like that was her whole thing. And I was
[07:25:39] like do you think it'd be possible for
[07:25:40] you to help people and to make money?
[07:25:42] And she was like well yeah. And I was
[07:25:44] like, "Okay, do you think you could help
[07:25:45] more people if you made more money?" And
[07:25:48] she was like, "Yeah." And in that
[07:25:50] conversation, she shifted from being
[07:25:51] what I would consider a bleeding heart
[07:25:53] of just like doing everything like just
[07:25:55] trying to just just help every single
[07:25:57] person. But the thing is is you're li
[07:25:58] your resources are so limited. You can't
[07:26:00] do much. And so if you want to help a
[07:26:02] lot of people, it's like you got to
[07:26:03] learn the game. And the thing is to win
[07:26:05] that game, it's like you probably have
[07:26:06] to outwork people, a lot of people. And
[07:26:08] you have to be called names by people
[07:26:10] who live lives that you don't like. I
[07:26:11] want to be very clear about this. When I
[07:26:13] say work hard and smart, it doesn't mean
[07:26:15] it's going to be exciting. So 12 here is
[07:26:19] accept boredom.
[07:26:21] Like if you want to be creative, you
[07:26:23] must first learn to be bored. If you
[07:26:25] want to achieve a goal, you'll either
[07:26:27] have to accept boredom or pain. And the
[07:26:29] bigger the goal, the more of both you're
[07:26:30] going to get. I have this great visual
[07:26:32] in my head about how winning works,
[07:26:34] right? And so you imagine you have this
[07:26:36] this marathon, right, that you're
[07:26:37] running. So you've got this starting
[07:26:39] line here, right? Start. And then you've
[07:26:41] got this big race, right? And then
[07:26:43] you've got a finish line over here.
[07:26:44] Tada. Finish. Now, when you've seen a
[07:26:47] race, where do people gather? They
[07:26:49] gather here. And they gather here. So,
[07:26:51] here's the question. Where does the
[07:26:52] winning happen? On your own. Cuz no one
[07:26:55] cheers for you not drinking for a day or
[07:26:58] not smoking, you know, on a lawn drive
[07:26:59] if you're trying to quit or not
[07:27:00] overeating for one night or skipping out
[07:27:02] on going to the club with the boys. No
[07:27:04] one cheers for that. No workout or meal
[07:27:07] is ever impressive on its own. And so
[07:27:10] the reason so few people understand
[07:27:11] success or at least achieve it in my
[07:27:13] opinion is that consistency never looks
[07:27:15] impressive in the moment only at the
[07:27:17] end. Because if you think about how
[07:27:18] consist like it's very difficult to
[07:27:20] visualize consistency because you can
[07:27:22] only see someone do something once,
[07:27:24] right? You see a snapshot of someone
[07:27:26] take a shot or hit a backhand. The only
[07:27:29] way that you can actually witness
[07:27:30] consistency is working with people who
[07:27:33] are consistent. Because the thing that
[07:27:35] you have to see is that person show up
[07:27:37] every single day. Like someone could
[07:27:38] show a workout of me working out and
[07:27:40] someone else might be like, "Okay, well,
[07:27:42] I mean that's a workout. Maybe I should
[07:27:44] kind of work out like that." And sure,
[07:27:45] there's a level of intensity that might
[07:27:46] be there or form and things like that,
[07:27:47] whatever. But the thing that people
[07:27:49] won't see is it's very hard to witness
[07:27:51] 20 years cuz you have to be there for 20
[07:27:53] years. And this is why I think so few
[07:27:54] people are able to internalize
[07:27:56] consistency, which is the most important
[07:27:58] success trait, because it's very hard to
[07:28:00] lose if you show up every day. It's very
[07:28:02] hard. And showing up every day is
[07:28:04] boring. And so if we're willing to
[07:28:05] accept boredom, the next thing that
[07:28:07] we're going to have to be willing to
[07:28:08] accept is sacrifice.
[07:28:10] We have to give up some things to get
[07:28:12] others. And so like at the end of the
[07:28:14] day, like all we have are trade-offs. We
[07:28:16] have what we have and what we want. And
[07:28:18] the question is, what are the things
[07:28:19] that you currently have? Are you willing
[07:28:20] to trade for the things you want? And I
[07:28:22] think this such a perfect way of
[07:28:23] thinking about it. Like you have
[07:28:25] everything in your life right now that
[07:28:26] you're going to have to trade. Like
[07:28:28] everyone trades. Everyone starts even
[07:28:29] when you had at zero. You have things in
[07:28:31] your life and you have to trade those
[07:28:33] things for things that you currently
[07:28:35] want but don't have. There's no perfect
[07:28:37] way to live your 20s or your 30s, right?
[07:28:39] You either live them up and become an
[07:28:40] underskilled 30 or 40-year-old or you
[07:28:42] work them up and become an underlived 30
[07:28:45] or 40-year-old. You just have to figure
[07:28:46] out which you'd rather be and accept the
[07:28:48] trade-offs and know that there are no
[07:28:49] doovers. And that's okay. And when we're
[07:28:51] really thinking about sacrifice right
[07:28:54] now, no human will ever get more than 24
[07:28:56] hours per day. We all have that, right?
[07:28:58] And so fundamentally everything that you
[07:29:01] spend your time on that is not you
[07:29:04] pursuing your goal you are determining
[07:29:06] is more important than your goal. And so
[07:29:08] if you look at what you did every single
[07:29:10] one of these hours and then you actually
[07:29:12] surface it and say you know what
[07:29:13] watching Netflix you know doom scrolling
[07:29:16] Tik Tok and Instagram hanging around
[07:29:18] doing nothing surfing the web or
[07:29:20] whatever it is that people do these days
[07:29:21] that is what's actually more important
[07:29:23] to you based on your behavior. And so,
[07:29:25] is it really a sacrifice to give that up
[07:29:28] for what you want? Because the thing is
[07:29:30] is that a year from now, you're not
[07:29:31] going to look back on today and be like,
[07:29:32] "Man, I'm so glad." Like, those clips
[07:29:35] that I watched really changed things for
[07:29:36] me. They you probably won't even
[07:29:38] remember any of the clips that you saw.
[07:29:40] They did a great research study on this
[07:29:41] where they did short form versus long
[07:29:43] form even and people remember like 11%.
[07:29:46] Like 24 hours later, it was a tiny
[07:29:49] percentage. And so we have to accept
[07:29:51] that the things that we spending our
[07:29:53] time on most of the time is just wasting
[07:29:55] our time on. And so I think Senica said
[07:29:57] this, it's not that we don't have enough
[07:29:59] time, it's that we waste the time we
[07:30:01] have. I come back to this which is like
[07:30:03] is it really a sacrifice or you finally
[07:30:05] just saying I believe this is my
[07:30:08] priority and therefore all of these
[07:30:09] things that are not helping me pursue
[07:30:11] that I'm now going to trade out for
[07:30:13] things that will help me get this
[07:30:14] priority. That's it. And to me, if you
[07:30:17] like what you're going to get, why would
[07:30:18] you not make the trade? And so I had
[07:30:20] this clip that went super viral from a
[07:30:22] podcast that I did yesterday. And the
[07:30:23] host asked me, "If all my books and all
[07:30:25] my tweets and all my emails and all my
[07:30:27] YouTube videos were all deleted and I
[07:30:29] had to compress all of my stuff uh into
[07:30:32] into 60 seconds, what would I say for
[07:30:34] somebody who's in their 20s and 30s?"
[07:30:36] This is what I said. Figure out what you
[07:30:37] want. Ignore the opinions of others and
[07:30:39] do so much volume that it would be
[07:30:41] unreasonable to not be successful.